Even before the sun was up, people were busy practicing and getting ready. The schedule said they had to get from before 'I'm Not That Girl' to right before 'Defying Gravity'. It was a lot to do.
"Ok, to begin, I need just Fiyero, Elphaba, and Galinda. Now get busy!" The author was trying to avoid another fistfight. "Ok. Martin and Rose you begin on stage with the lion cage. I NEED THE LION CAGE!" the author yelled. There was no action from the props department. "Lion Cage, Methuselah!"
"Uh . . . What?... Oh . . . I fell asleep," he grumbled sleepily.
"Get me the lion cage please," the author said smiling through clenched teeth.
"Oh the lion cage. Lemme see . . . I think I left it here . . . " he dove into a larger pile of stuff.
"Tell me if you find it," the author said as she tried not to attack the old mouse. "Now start." The scene was so extremely realistic and tender that the author almost forgot it was acting. "Oh, that was so sweet!" the author thought to herself as Martin ran offstage. "Ok music!" Rose was perfect. When the music break happened, the author stopped the scene. Checking to see Matthias was nowhere to be seen, she rushed out the placing on the bridge. "Ok thisiswhereFiyeroandGalindacomeoutandkissOkgotitlet'sgo!"
"WHAT?!?!?!" Martin, Rose, Cornflower, and Matthias, who had just walked in at the wrong moment, yelled.
"Yes," the author said nervously, seeing Matthias and Rose lunging toward Martin and Cornflower, "Kiss I know it's wrong and bad and awkward, but it's acting and it's not real. So deal with it!" The author was in a bad position. She was in between the two seething mice and their newfound enemies. Before she could move out of the way, she was caught in-between a huge fistfight. Barely making it out without serious injury, she ran out of the way. "Stop! Stop! Please!" The four couldn't hear her as they were too busy tearing each other apart. "Enough already!" A crowd was gathering to see what the ruckus was about.
"I SAID ENOUGH!! STOP!!" She screamed at the top of her lungs. The fighting stopped. "Everyone leave except Rose, Martin and Cornflower." The three mice sat sulking and rubbing their injuries. "Get on with the scene."
Rose sang her solo again. When it came to the moment on the bridge, they were about to kiss when Matthias, who was hiding in the wings, ran out, got in-between them and did the Mr. Ronson to Martin. Punch, punch in the face, kick in the groin. Martin was about to give him a piece of his mind when Cornflower got in between them and shrieked,
"STOP THIS FIGHTING!! IT'S ACTING!! GO IN THE GREEN ROOM MATTHIAS AND STAY THERE! LEAVE! L-E-A-V-E!!!" Surprised at the sudden outburst, he left. The scene went on without anymore maiming. Everything went smoothly right up until One Short Day. The citizens of the Emerald City were Cluny's horde. So you can imagine some of the issues. First of all, they were awful, awful singers and dancers. It was not a pretty sight. They tripped over each other trying to dance and their singing sounded more like the Jonas Brothers singing while on the rack. Rose and Cornflower were having trouble being friendly after the bridge incident. Some of the horde was obviously a bit mental because they were prancing around like girls at a picnic. It was very disturbing.
"Who's the mage/whose major itinerary is making all Oz merrier?" the chorus sang while swaying and doing the can-can.
"STOP! WHAT THE *beep* ARE YOU DOING?!" the author yelled.
"The can-can," Scragg said. The author was afraid he was going to be attacked by Cheesethief. He was grinning evilly in his direction.
"Well don't do it! It's ruining the scene!"
"But it's fun!"
"TOO BAD! Just do what I told you to do!" The scene ended with Rose and Cornflower singing through clenched teeth as they sang about being friends.
"Sharing one wonderful . . . one . . . short . . . " they sung. Silence.
"Uh . . . Redtooth?"
"What? Uh oh sorry, I kinda spaced out for a moment."
"Sing the line again!"
"Sharing one wonderful . . . one . . . short . . . " Silence.
"REDTOOTH!! WAKE UP!!"
"Oh sorry! The Wizard will see you now!"
"DAY!!!"
Then Cluny was supposed to come out with the Oz Head. But there was no Oz Head.
"Where's my Oz Head?" No answer.
"WHERE'S . . . MY . . . OZ . . . HEAD??!!" the author yelled at the top of their lungs.
"Well . . . um . . . I uh . . . "the stagehands began.
"Let me guess. It hasn't arrived yet," the author said sarcastically.
"Yeah . . . " they answered.
"Urgg. Pretend Cluny, pretend," the author grumbled annoyed. Cluny danced in with a top hat on and a cane.
"What the heck are you doing Cluny?"
"DANCING!"
"Well, you're not supposed to be. And why are you yelling?"
"'CAUSE I FEEL LIKE IT! YOU GOT A PROBLEM WITH THAT?"
"Not really . . . anyway just say your lines." Cluny then started yelling his lines so loudly, that Cornflower and Rose had to cover their ears to stop any permanent damage.
"Cluny, they can hear you. You don't need to yell," the author tried to tell him in a voice you would use on a three- year- old.
"BUT I'M PRACTICING MY THEATRICAL VOICE!" he screeched.
"Well, you don't need to. Just say your lines normally," the author, who didn't want to be deaf after this, said. Cluny kept yelling, but not quite so loudly and sang very badly. Very badly. And the yelling didn't help things. And he was tap-dancing through it. The author didn't even bother commenting. Methuselah couldn't find the Grimmiere, so they had to pretend. Constance did not look happy next to Cluny. It went ok until they had to move the sets to reveal the flying monkeys. The only way to do that was on the Oz head. But there was no Oz head. The four of them looked at each other until Cluny got the idea of kicking the set. It worked. He yelled to the guards.
"GUARDS! GUARDS! THERE IS A FUGITIVE AT LARGE! FIND HER! CAPTURE HER!" he yelled dancing off. No guards came out.
"Repeat the line Cluny!" He repeated it. Still, no guards.
"GUARDS! WHERE ARE YOU?" the author yelled.
"Oh! Us! Here!" Ungatt Trunn, Cheesethief, Badrang, and Redtooth said running out with some . . . um . . . interesting weapons.
"Oops I forgot to blunt them . . . " the author said to herself worriedly as they ran off stage in the direction of their enemies.
The kicking of the set because there was no Oz head was a real London incident. I hope you like my story. Please review so I know. Oh and I forgot this for the other chapters! I don't own Redwall or Wicked or any of that of course. Oh and the 'Mr. Ronson' is a looooooong story. . . .
