Thank you soo much to all of you who took those few extra minutes to review and make a girl happy!
This chapter is really important because Ana finally remembers how her life was before going to live with her sister. There's actually a really big clue as to what happened to her here, but I don't think you'll get it that quick. Anyways if someone does, tell me what you thought it was or just about the chapter in general :)
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of the amazing characters by Stephenie Meyer. I only own the plot and my own characters. Any other song, location, etc. is owned by their respective authors.
All the color from my face was drained. I was numb. I was cold.
I was staring at Edward Cullen, my obsession, my dream… the face of perfection.
Holly shit, Edward Cullen! I would never have thought that this moment was going to happen. Not even in my wildest dreams would I have thought that Edward Cullen was going to be my classmate, much less my table partner.
This was so not happening… He was… perfect. I was tong tied just even looking at him.
After the initial shock died down a little, I started to really think…What in the world was I supposed to do? He probably was reading my mind from the moment I stepped into this classroom—no, he probably could read it when I was still in the hallway.
Quick, think fast, something quick… no no no it's better if you just don't think… and that was exactly what I did.
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Don't think.. don't think. The teacher signed my slip and gave me my book; he also looked at me weirdly, most likely because I was so freaked out that it was emanating from me. And to be expected my face wasn't helping; I just couldn't hide the fact that I was in the same room as HIM.
I started to walk towards my desk—or should I say, 'our desk'—trying to act, or at least appear as calm as I could. I took deep breaths and finally lifted my head, so I could see him again. He was watching me, staring at me like I was some big puzzle, I knew Bella had thought the same thing, and that actually gave me hopes that he could not read my mind. I also noticed that just like Jasper, he didn't seem fazed at all by my scent, I was grateful that I was not like Bella to him. Actually he didn't recoil from me, like vampires did from most humans—at least like the books had mentioned—and I was really intrigued. How come they could not smell me?
I finally took residence in my chair, and he was still looking at me, and he didn't even had the decency to look ashamed after being caught staring! But I could not do the same thing I had with Jasper—the staring contest—because if I looked at his eyes for too much time, I would most likely start to act like a lovesick fool, he was too handsome to just look at and not actually gawk, and I didn't want to make him uncomfortable. So I just kept my eyes firmly on the teacher, or any of our classmates, or reading my book, so I just wouldn't look at him.
After forty minutes had passed and the class was coming to an end, the teacher thought he'd be 'nice' and give us the last ten minutes of class to chitchat because we had been working diligently and therefore we had finished all the proposed activities quickly. I guessed that if I had been somewhere else, I might have been happy and thought the teacher was nice, but now I just thought that he was doing this to annoy me on purpose.
I could see on my peripheral view that Edward had been staring at me almost throughout the whole period. Sometimes he would look like a fish, he would open his mouth, but then he would stare at the teacher and just shake his head, and after various attempts I noticed that he wanted to talk to me. So that was exactly why I didn't want those free ten minutes. He would find the perfect chance to talk to me. And, I might have been happy, had this been another moment, but right now I just had a bad feeling. And I didn't know why… it was starting to freak me out.
"Hey there, I'm Edward. Edward Cullen"
Oh my god, even if I was freaked out, I couldn't not answer him, my heart sped up just thinking that he was talking to me.
I just smiled and tried to act nonchalant.
"Hi Edward, pleasure to meet you, I'm Ana"
"Yes, I know, is hard not to know in a school this small" he gave me his crooked smile and my hands just started to get even more cold and my heart sped up even more. How embarrassing that he could actually hear my reaction to him.
"Hmm yeah I guess, news travel fast" I didn't know what else to say, what are you supposed to do when the vampire of your dreams talks to you?
"Yeah, they do, so how old are you?" I sensed that there was some underlying meaning behind this question, another doubt wanting to be answered, but I couldn't know what that was.
"Seventeen" I answered automatically, wondering what on earth was so interesting about my age.
"Oh me too" he smirked, probably thinking that I didn't know why that would be so amusing, but I did get his inside joke. Smooth Edward, real smooth.
"So Ana, what made you move to Lynwood?"
"Well, I just needed a change I guess, and my sister had offered that I could come to college here, so I just needed to finish high school… again"
"Again?"
"Well yes, I've already finished high school back home, but I graduated really young, and college people are usually eighteen or nineteen and I had just turned seventeen. Plus I needed to get more used to the people and the fact that I was going to be talking in English all day long" I smiled thinking about my life back home, I did miss my friends and family, but I was starting to be happy here. I felt content, now I had the chance to bond more with my nieces and my sister.
"Oh yes, I had forgotten that you spoke Spanish fluently" he made a face, realizing that he had slipped; I hadn't told him that I spoke Spanish fluently, and he just couldn't assume that I did. Nobody knew I was Latin American before I told them, my name and last name weren't Hispanic and now days just because of someone's looks you couldn't say anything either.
I smirked at him, waiting to see what he would say to recover his slip, but the vampire in question was incredibly lucky, because just when I was going to ask him, the bell rang. So he rose fluently from his chair, disarming me momentarily with his ethereal beauty.
Then he bid me farewell "Nos vemos Ana, fué un placer hablar contigo" (See you, Ana, it was a pleasure speaking to you)
"Bye Edward" and I sighed… he was just… lovely.
After staring at Edward for a solid minute, I found out that everybody had already left the classroom. They had flown, I had been so flustered while speaking to Edward, that I hadn't remembered that, the bell that had rung was the final bell. The day was over.
I gathered my stuff, took my backpack and bottle of water and left towards my locker, I needed to grab all my books and notebooks that I had left for homework. After I had taken everything, I grabbed my car keys and started walking to my car. The parking lot was almost empty when I got to my car, unfortunately Mike was still there, and he approached me.
"Hiya Ana"
"Hey Mike, what's up?
"Oh nothing much, I'm just waiting for Jessica"
"You are? ... I didn't know you guys were dating" I said puzzled, I didn't remember them being together, they were supposed to have finished their relationship already, or was that in Breaking Dawn…? god I didn't remember facts such as those. I seriously needed to reread those books again.
"Oh we aren't, we just need to finish a project together, and we need to stop by the hospital to interview a few doctors and nurses" he responded and I noticed a slight blush to his cheeks.
"Oh" was my brilliant response, but hey, I had nothing interesting to say to that. I noticed for the first time since I got out of the building that it was lightly drizzling, so I just told goodbye to Mike and hurried to my lovely car before it started pouring.
On the drive home, I started analyzing all the facts about my first day of school, it had been definitely interesting, but the Cullen's reactions towards me were weird. Well first of all… WHAT THE HELL! SINCE WHEN DO VAMPIRES EXIST AND BOOKS COME TRUE! I was extremely panicked, it seemed like I was catching up with the fact that I was in a fictional world just about now.
Thank god I arrived at my house shortly after my not so little outburst, because I had already started to doubt my ability to be behind a wheel for a prolonged period of time. I ran all the way from my car towards the door, because as I had predicted it had started raining on my way home. I went inside the house and said a quick hello to my sister and nieces, apparently Xavier wasn't home yet (that's my brother in law). I climbed the stairs two at time, I couldn't be alone faster.
When I finally got to room, I dumped my stuff unceremoniously on the floor and threw myself in my bed. I just gazed at my ceiling for at least fifteen minutes, and then I started crying. I cried because I was mad, I cried because I didn't understand things, and finally I cried because I was frustrated. I didn't know what was going on in my life. What was wrong with me? Stuff like these simply did not happen. This was reality, book characters did not appear out of thin air. And most important of all: vampires did not exist. I knew this for Christ's sake.
Then even if all of the above mentioned were actually real, then how would you explain the Cullen's reactions to me? First Alice smiled at me, the Jasper seemed unaffected by me scent and actually talked to me. And then Edward Cullen also talked to me, and he seemed like he was too interested. What the hell, what did they know about me? Edward's questions had seemed innocent at the time, but I remembered that I felt like there was more to his questioning than what appeared on the surface. He seemed too curious about me, like he already knew something firsthand and was just trying to get more information out of me.
But well… I couldn't complain, talking to him was one of the best things that had happened to me in a long time. Boys never paid any attention to me, and the fact that Edward Cullen had actually ignited a conversation between us was definitely something.
As I laid there on my bed, crying over my frustrations, I couldn't help but remember all those nights that for the last three years I had cried because of my life—or actually lack of it. My life was regular I guess, I had good friends, excellent grades, I was normal looking. But still I was always so negative. I was too fat, too ugly, to tall, my boobs were too big, my butt was too big, my grades weren't good enough, people didn't like me enough. I was never enough, I had considered several times killing myself, but I guess I never actually had the courage. My parents and friends though I was crazy, sometimes I would just be in my room all day reading, I wouldn't talk to them, I would just get out to eat. I knew everyone was worried about me, so I tried to do my best to not look like a nutcase, but it was hard. Being happy was hard, it wasn't in me. There was always something wrong with me. People knew I was messed up, they just didn't know how extensive my damage was.
To make matters worse I had liked this guy named George for the past couple of years, I had experienced a few crushes on several guys but never something as what I had for George, it's till today and I think I still love the guy. He was in school with me, he was so nice, and really smart, I could actually talk to him about books, he liked my same type of music—I didn't listen to girly girl type of music—he was tall, athletic, a terrific musician and decent looking. He was perfect—at least for me—well to make a long story short I loved the guy for three years, and the worst part is that he actually knew it, and he did things to make me all gooey-in love, while ignoring me at the same time. They guy never looked at me twice but somehow I was okay with it, I was already used to be treated like a pariah by some people.
Then one night we were at a party, most of my friends were there, I remember we were celebrating his birthday, and he made out with a supposed "friend" of mine right in front of me, knowing that I was in love with him. It was horrible, I remembered I just stood there; speechless, motionless, not seeing anything but the two of them all lovey dovey. I remember how I just walked really slow towards the door, then when I was outside I started crying, Cassandra was with her boyfriend Carlos and when they saw me they rushed towards me, Cass knew why I was so worked up but Carlos didn't, so she couldn't exactly talk about it, she told me if I was ok to drive and I remember telling her I was. Stuff seems fuzzy after that, and I couldn't care less about what happened later… I don't even remember how I ended up in my house.
All my life got worse after that, I knew it seemed stupid to get this worked up over a boy, but I was traumatized enough from before and I really do love the guy. Even after I know that he's idiot, I still love him, I cannot hate him, it just isn't in me.
Then as graduation neared, as I was so happy I could get out and not watch the two of them again, I remember how people always told me that the best part of your life is high school, but what if it was the worst? What was I supposed to expect from the rest of my life?
Then my sister offered me to come here and I couldn't tell her no, this was my perfect chance. A chance at normality, at happiness. A chance that would let me start fresh, with no one tagging me as the sad girl anymore. I was still sad and sometimes depressed but I was content here, I was trying to get over my earlier problems and I had trouble sometimes but at least I tried. I didn't want people thinking I was like this because of a boy, because I wasn't. I had self-esteem issues from before and I was working on them, slow but steadily. I wanted to be the girl I was before. Before my too fat/too ugly/too stupid/not good enough started to emerge.
I wanted to leave those times behind, and I was currently concentrating on being happy. I decided that I didn't care how the Cullens came to existence. I was just happy that I could get to have them in my life, I had dreamed countless of times about this, and now that I had it I was definitely not going to miss this opportunity.
So with my mind resolved, I got up and happily walked over to my bathroom, I saw my face in the mirror and winced at what I saw. I definitely looked like a mess. I washed my face and brushed my teeth and started working on my homework.
I spent ages on those things, I did Math first, I loved it and finished it quickly, unfortunately I still had an essay from English, and that took ages for me to finish. My eyes were tired from crying—and I couldn't stand the brightness from the computer—and my mind kept wondering to the Cullens and everything, and if it hadn't, then I would've seriously started to doubt my sanity. It was just to shocking to forget about it that quickly.
When I finished I went downstairs looking for something to eat, I settled on milk and cereal. I wasn't in the mood for a huge supper. Then with a full stomach I headed upstairs to listen to some music before going to sleep.
I put some Blue October, otherwise known as my "depressive music" according to my friends. I quickly fell asleep listening to Sound of Pulling Heaven Down.
Several people have told me that the fact that Ana doesn't have a heartbeat and she's not a vampire is weird and they want me to explain that, but sorry right now I can't tell you because it would ruin the story! In the next chapters you are going to find details that little by little will be piecing the story together.
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