Severus: Rooster!
James: I wish.
Severus: Bestiality?
Narrator: After a brief fight the two are dragged back to the table by Tonks and forced to read again.
He was moving slowly inside him at first, but gradually started moving faster and faster. Both of them were moaning loudly in pleasure and it didn't take long before they both came.
James: Back to their senses!
Snape slipped out of James and leaned on the other man
Severus: Who was in the room recording the whole thing.
James: You can't just rape me and then lean on this other man.
as he was tired. James thought it was over and let his body relax, but Snape started chuckling.
"That was nice… but now it's time to punish you."
Remus: I don't understand…any of it!
Tonks: Sirius, are you crying?
Sirius: *Sniffle* no.
James looked wondering at Snape. "Down on the floor."
"How?" James asked.
Remus: Not-
Tonks: Not on your head. We get it.
Remus: I'm worried.
"Ass up,"
Remus: Oh god.
Severus: Yeah we all know, it's quite horrific.
Remus: No, he's on his head.
Snape smirked. James blushed and went down on the floor like he wanted him. "Now, spread your legs Potter."
James: Please don't make me read anymore.
Severus: We kind of have to.
James: Why?
Severus: To get out of hell.
Everyone: Purgatory!
Severus: Right, sorry.
He stepped away for a moment and got a bottle of liquor from a cabinet. After rummaging through some drawers he also found a cork screw.
Sirius: I can think of a couple of things to do with that.
Tonks: Oh god.
Sirius: Yep, I don't know how many situations I've been in where I've said 'I wish I had a cork screw.'
His laugh was almost evil as he walked back.
Tonks: Yet, strangely motherly.
"This is gonna hurt."
Severus: My brain.
He put it in James' ass and began pouring it inside of him.
Sirius: Oh god the cork-screw?
Remus: It would appear.
Sirius: Obviously the author and I aren't using the same kind of corkscrew.
Remus: Obviously.
Sirius: I wish I had a corkscrew.
It was really painful and James wanted to scream, but he stayed as quiet as he could. Only a few whimpers of pain escaped his lips.
Severus: Because I slit his throat!
James: Must you sound so happy about that?
When the bottle was empty, Snape put the cork in James' hole
James: Ear hole! Ear…hole.
to keep it there. Snape got up and got a chair to sit on.
"Now, come to me."
Severus: Good boy! Now roll over.
Sirius: Me…dog. Not him.
James: You can be in the story if you want.
Sirius: (Goes white) No, never mind.
James stumbled over to him. His body was shaking. "Does it hurt?"
"Yes."
"How bad?"
"I've never felt this much pain before."
James: Except that one time.
Remus: Ah yes, that one time.
Tonks: You both really disturb me.
Snape smiled. James' voice was shaky and he struggled to keep quiet.
"Sit down on my lap." James sat down so they sat face to face. "Don't be afraid to show that you hurt. Now, entertain me. Rub your ass against my cock
Severus: Rooster.
Tonks: Not again. Sit.
Severus: Aw.
and…" He placed his hand on James' face. "Kiss me."
James started rubbing against Snape's cock as he was told and kissed him, but only briefly. Their lips barely met. After two kisses like that he put his head down. Tears started leaking out of his eyes. He stopped moving.
Tonks: *Shudder*
Remus: You alright?
Tonks: No, my mental images started working again.
Severus: I like to imagine we're puppets here.
Sirius: Why puppets?
Severus: Puppets don't have genitalia.
Sirius: Oh, that's a good idea.
Tonks: Ow, your logic, it hurts.
"What?" Snape wondered. "Continue."
James looked straight into his eyes. His glasses had fallen off long ago. Snape seemed shocked.
Severus: My god, you have eyes!
"I-I-I I'm sorry,"
Sirius: Three extra 'i's, that's how you know he's really sorry.
James: Am I supposed to be stuttering? I don't stutter.
Tonks: Even if you did no one stutters like that.
James stuttered. He collapsed onto Snape and embraced him with weak arms.
Severus: Just what I wanted, a pair of arms.
Sirius: What can you do with those?
Severus: Potions, ten times better than if you're using animals.
Sirius: I wish I had a corkscrew.
"I tried my best… but… but." He started sobbing. "The pain is too much. Do you really hate me his much?"
Severus: That depends, how much does 'His' hate you?
His voice was still shaking. He tried speaking properly, but his mouth wouldn't listen.
Tonks: No, mouths aren't supposed to listen. That's what ears are for.
"I wanted to make you… hap-py! At this would m-make us even.
Severus: Nothing could make us even.
James: Agreed Snivellus.
I-I love you!"
James: Nope. I don't.
Sirius: Aw, you weally wike him!
Snape turned away from James. His eyes fell on the carrot
Severus: Why the carrot?
Remus: It was an innocent carrot.
Severus: I mean, I don't even like carrots.
Remus: Right, that's what I meant too.
he had used before. It was blood on it. "No…" he whispered. Snape lifted James and moved him to the floor. He tried getting up, but James held him back. "Let go! Now!" Snape's voice was full of hurry and fear. James let him go.
All: Ehh?
Sirius: I have to ask it, what in the hell is going on?
All: Ehh?
"I'm sorry… I just wanted to…"
"Shut up!" Snape
Severus: Told the author before he bashed her over the head with a bedpost.
Remus: Snivelly, we're better than that! We have magic!
grabbed the cork and let the liquor run out. "Red? All red?"
James: At least it's not blue.
Sirius: That would be quite worrisome.
Severus: What kind of liquor were we using?
Sirius: Horrible liquor from hell.
Tonks: Purgatory!
Remus: No dear, only when Severus accuses us of being in hell do we say that.
Tonks: I thought it was just when someone said the word.
The liquor had mixed with the blood and was now a bright red shade. Snape looked at James who was still wincing in pain.
"I'll take you to the nurses' office right away," Snape said and wrapped his cape
Sirius: You get a cape! No fair.
Severus: I'm a superhero suddenly.
around James. He carried him to the Nurse as fast as he could.
Sirius: Did you get super speed?
Severus: Yes.
Sirius: Neat.
When he got there he was simply told to wait. Not before an hour later, he was allowed in. The nurse came over to him.
"You were the boy who found him, right?" she asked.
Severus: Nope, I'm the boy who lived.
"What?" Snape asked confused. What had James said?
"Mr. Potter says you found him like that, but he can't remember who did this to him or what happened. Just that you came to his rescue," she explained.
"Right… eh… is he okay now?"
James: Hells to the no!
"Yes. He's fine, but he'll have to lie here for a while. He won't be capable to walk for at least a week. Possibly two."
Remus: Don't we have magic…to fix this?
Tonks: Obviously not.
Remus: Twisted fic-world.
"So can I go inside?"
James: Oh no, I've heard that line before.
"Sure. Just answer this. Did you see who did this to him?"
"No. I'm sorry."
"Well, I guess there is nothing more for me to do with this case." She showed Snape James'
Tonks: Snape James'?
Sirius: It's like some horrible half-breed. If I saw one, I'd kill it. With a corkscrew.
bed and left the room. He found a chair
Tonks: And he won the scavenger's hunt!
and sat down by James' face.
Remus: There has got to be a better way to have that sentence arranged.
"I…" he started, but stopped when he saw James smiling.
Severus: You enjoyed it?
James: Yep, I'm a masochist.
"Did you mean what you said when you were in pain?" he continued.
"Every word," he smiled.
James: Why the hell am I smiling?
James took Snape's hand and Snape bent down over James and kissed him. It felt so good.
Written by ml90
Severus: Now we know who to kill.
James: I have my killing wand.
Sirius: And I need to find a corkscrew.
Translated and slightly improved by Spklvrg
Remus: Speklevreg, am I pronouncing that right? Anyway Speklevreg needs to learn the meaning of the word 'Improved'.
Severus: While I agree I have to tell you, you are pronouncing that wrong. It pronounced Spklvrg, duh.
James: How do you know?
Severus: I text… a lot.
Tonks: It's over?
Remus: I believe so.
Severus: I'm taking an acid bath.
James: I'm going to go rip out my eyes now.
Sirius: Hey! I'm normal me again!
Tonks: Um, Sirius…
Sirius: Damn! I'm sixteen again! Wait doesn't this mean….
A new fic: Falls on the table.
Everyone: Dies a little more inside.
Narcissa: And yes, this means I am doomed to read more fics, but this fic is done. Now, I'm off to find something else awful. Haha...someone kill me.
