i wanna break this spell...that you've created
The library was thankfully very warm, when Harry entered. A soft bustling whisper surrounded him, coming from various students positioned around dark wooden tables or alone in dim brown chairs placed near hazy reading lamps. The library was wide and always had an inviting wave of comfort from the several fireplaces situated along the far walls. Harry understood why people like Hermione, constantly engrossed in their accurate speculations, would find salvation in places like this. Remembering why he had entered this area of the castles, Harry scanned the room. He noticed startlingly red hair in the far corner behind a gap in a bookshelf and headed towards it. The anticipation of Hermione and Ron's questions built up inside of Harry, getting steadily more dreadful the closer he got to his two close friends.
They were sitting quietly around a small circular table, but an atmosphere of a conversation hastily silenced when they saw Harry approaching lingered, from the way Hermione and Ron repeatedly glanced at each other. Harry slumped uneasily into the waiting chair to the left of Hermione, who was reading Transfiguration notes, and right of Ronald, who was aimlessly reading his thick dark blue Charms textbook. The three friends sat in forced silence for several minutes.
Harry leant back and listened to his chair creak, scanning the shelves beside him. He looked over the neatly placed books, some with chunks of fabric missing in the binds and others with large and oddly coloured stains on them. He hated the murmuring flowing past his ears indifferently and found them off-putting.
Harry felt that his entire expression was tense as he thought about Malfoy. He then experienced an awkward twinge of guilt as he rembered pushing him off him and causing the shocked and extremely hurt look that Draco had sent his way. Harry could help but remember Malfoy's electric touch and now he wanted nothing more than to find him; to both kiss him and punch him in the face. Naturally, he was quite unable to relax.
Harry began sweeping his eyes over a thick dark red book bind that looked like it had been cut with a jagged knife. Ron was drumming four fingers on the table as he vaguely turned the pages in his book. Hermione kept fidgeting as she kept glancing at Harry, becoming more and more worried. She spoke through the strange tension that had emerged between them.
"Harry, what's wrong?" Hermione finally said, openly looking up from her notes. Her tone was flat and frank…more so than usual. Ron stopped drumming his fingers to look up.
Harry turned his body away from the bookshelf slowly and placed all four legs on his chair back to the wooden floor with a soft clunk. He traced his finger over one of the patterns on the wood of the table while shaking his head, holding back a grimace. Suddenly, he remembered Hermione and Ron had seen him with Malfoy and his hands started shaking slightly as he started to panic silently. He balled both hands into fists and pressed his knuckles into the table. When this caused the unsteady table to shake quite noisily, he twined his fingers together and focused hard on trying to steady his trembling hands. He licked his dry lips nervously before he began speaking.
"Nothing Herm'…N-Nothing." He tried to smile at her but ended up making a fake painful sneer instead. Feeling how taunt his muscles felt from the strange expression, Harry then pressed his lips hard together, trying to look as blank as possible.
Hermione widened her eyes when she saw Harry trembling so much. She glanced at Ron who caught her eye; he seemed as equally taken aback. Hermione placed her notes carefully on the circular table and smoothed the top parchment before continuing, breathing deeply and moving fluidly to try and keep the atmosphere calm and stop Harry from panicking so much. Hermione's dark chocolate eyes looked into Harry's intently yet kindly for answers. Harry hated it when she did that. He tried instead to focus on the whispers surrounding them but he no longer found them distracting.
"Do you recall something I said to you around a week ago?" She said in one breath. She slowed down and titled her head slightly when she carried on. "In Potions?"
Harry bit his lips and blinked slightly before gazing at his hands.
He remembered.
"Harry? Haaarry?" Hermione's gentle voice said in Harry's ear, shaking his shoulder slightly when he didn't look up straight away.
"Hmm?" He said, turning his watchful eye from his Potion that he was giving his hundred percent (since he was sick of receiving Ps and didn't have Snape's hatred towards him to blame.)
"Okay. I don't want you to freak out and for God's sake, pleeease be subtle." Hermione said biting her lip when she finished speaking.
Harry chuckled slightly whilst stirring his Potion precisely and said "Subtle is my middle name."
Hermione's eyes narrowed as she ignored his heavy sarcasm. She then said very quietly "I believe that…that Draco Malfoy has been…staring at you for the last fifteen minutes."
"WHAT?" Harry hissed slightly too loudly as he began to crane his neck around Hermione's crazy hair to look at the Slytherin for himself. Hermione grabbed the sides of Harry's messy black hair painfully, forcing him to look her straight in the eye.
"STOP IT." She hissed, almost turning round to check Draco's reaction but she was positive a curious expression must have emerged.
She let go of Harry's hair, and spoke quietly as he rubbed the sides of his head, screwing his eyes dramatically to seem in pain. "I've noticed it before, but I simply dismissed it…but it's kind of getting obvious. I'm quite positive now, that, Malfoy simply likes you."
Harry dropped his hands to his laps and stared at Hermione's slightly amused smile, knowing that her tone was filled with honesty. He opened and closed his mouth several times before saying in one ragged breath "andwhyexactlyshouldIcare?"
Harry turned extremely quickly to refocus his attention on his Potion and complicated ingredients but his over enthusiasm to turn away from Hermione caused his glasses to fly off his face and land in the cauldron. The once navy water, bubbling happily, turned a nasty shade of thick murky brown. Harry winced when he heard the unmistakable sound of loud crunching glass as violent black sparks flew out of the cauldron. Hermione, who was trying to stifle her laughter, fished out her wand and tapped the pot.
With an even louder crunching noise, the mixture swelled and squeezed out a pair of extremely squashed and stained glasses. Harry watched it float out of the potion and land gently on the table, leaving bits of glass still mixing in the cauldron.
Harry looked at Hermione with a carefully constructed blank face and said "This is what happens when I decide to give a fuck about Potions." Hermione bursts out laughing as she tapped the glasses and began mending them.
But then Harry felt a eccentric rushing feeling through his chest when he heard an unmistakable low chuckle from someone hidden behind Hermione's head.
Hermione took a deep breath, waiting for Harry's reply.
But Harry said nothing. He just stared at his hands and could see a faint bruise emerging on his wrist where Malfoy had gripped him.
Looking up, he saw Ron open his mouth to say something so Harry snatched his dark sapphire book from the table and pretending to start reading the chapter on new incantations they had been assigned to learn.
Hermione exhaled and carefully asked, trying to sound merely interested "Where did you and Malfoy go?"
Harry slammed the book on the table at the same time the school bell went, sending horrible echoes around him as he left the library. He wanted to swear at Ron when he sniggered and knowingly said "Aaah…"
xxxxx
Hermione and Ron did not question Harry for the rest of the morning, which gradually became warmer. All pupils still walked around wearing oddly thick robes but were not shivering continuously. Bright light, reflecting over melting layers of snow on the school grounds, drifted into the school. So bright, it gave nearly everyone a headache.
xxxxx
At lunch, Harry walked at their side through the entrance to the Great Hall. However, he glanced unconsciously to his right and then significantly sped up and stared fixatedly at the Gryffindor table, moving hastily through the vivid light pouring in through the enchanted ceiling. Hermione and Ron glanced in the same direction that Harry had briefly diverted his attention and saw a platinum blonde boy watching Harry miserably.
Ron was chuckling quietly, his shaking shoulders giving him away, and Hermione had to hit him as they sat opposite Harry, who had stiffly placed himself on the bench with his back to the Slytherins. Hermione felt a strange amount of symathy towards Malfoy, since he was absent-mindedly gazing at Harry, looking like nothing could possibly get worse for him.
As the trio ate, Ron unsubtly looked over Harry's left shoulder whenever Harry glanced up at him. The fifth time he did this, Harry had had enough. He flicked his wand sharply and caused Ron's face to fall and be glued into his pasta. Harry became even more annoyed when he saw Ron started laughing uncontrollably. Suddenly, a force pushed the back of Harry's head as Ron swished his own wand and sent Harry straight into his cold beans.
Hermione snatched the two wizards' wands as both their loud laughs muffled through their food. She refused to unglue their faces...until Harry banged his fists childishly on the table, but with his ridiculous strength, it caused nearly every single goblet and plate on the whole table to clatter manically.
xxxxx
"Can I ask you something?" Blaise asked, not looking up from his pasta.
"Go on then…" Draco said, eyes flickering between Blaise's face and the back of Harry's head.
Blaise latched his dark eyes with Draco's smoky grey ones, as he shifted to his left, blocking Harry from Draco's view. Draco looked at Blaise angrily and began muttering loudly and darkly as he poked his sandwich with no intention of eating it.
Blaise sighed when Draco shot his eyes up suddenly when he heard Potter's carrying distinctive laugh echo through the glowing Great Hall. Draco looked down again and started tapping the table, this time not speaking as he waited patiently for Blaise to continue.
"Better. Now, I was just wondering, why were so full of shock after your little detention with Potter? I mean you knew you liked him so…" Blaise waved his hands lazily, gesturing to Draco to continue and enlighten him.
"I knew I liked him for whatever fucked up reason." Draco muttered, looking down at the table sadly, running his pale finger over the edge of his plate as Blaise watched him. "I just…didn't now I wanted him quite so badly that it felt like someone shoved a singe in my back when my hand accidentally brushed his."
Draco realised how pathetic this made him sound and was consumed by an odd feeling of utter amusement so he looked up and smirked widely at Blaise, who smiled back. But it was not an amused smile Draco received back. It was one filled with pity and understanding. So Draco returned to looking down, being defeated and wishing that the ground would swallow him. Blaise dug his fork into his pasta, knowing that was all Draco had to say.
Around ten minutes past and neither of the two Slytherins said anything to each other. Draco then heard more booming laughter and watched as Weasley and Potter stumbled through towards the entrance hall, followed by a reluctantly giggling Granger. Weasley and Potter had food stuck to their hair, uniform and faces. Blaise turned round to follow Draco's line of sight before returning to his food. Draco pretended to ignore Zabini when he muttered "You're in love with an idiot" but grinned to himself when he agreed.
A lack of colour – death cab for cutie
It taught me that some boys actually do have feelings.
