~I wasn't born for diggin deep holes
I'm not made for pavin long roads
I aint cut out to climb high line poles
But I'm pretty good at drinkin beer
I'm not the type to work in a bank
I'm no good at slappin on paint
Don't have a knack for makin motors crank, no
But I'm pretty good at drinkin beer~
After they'd sat down and had a couple of beers, the atmosphere between them all seemed much more relaxed and normal. Everyone was in a good mood; Jackie didn't even complain about the twangy country music on the jukebox.
"Now that you four are all coupled-up, it is time to get Fez a woman, yes?"
Kelso nodded. "Well, sure... I'll be wingman."
"What is wingman?" Fez asked excitedly.
"Well... it means I'll go find a hottie, and you can scoop up her less attractive, more desperate friend."
Fez nodded, pleased. "Yes, a plan that could actually work..." he agreed. "The less attractive friend is always more desperate..."
"Exactly- that's our bread and butter, my friend." Kelso nodded.
Donna rolled her eyes. "You two are disgusting. Go... do that over there."
"All right, we'll leave the squares in middle-aged-coupledom." Kelso smirked, walking off with Fez close in tow.
"We are not 'squares'." Jackie huffed.
Hyde suddenly whispered something in her ear and she smiled, flushing.
"Okay, ew, you two- come on, let's go play pool?" Donna suggested.
~So hand me one more
That's what I'm here for
I'm built for having a ball
I love the nightlife
I love my budlight
I like 'em cold and tall
I aint much for mowin thick grass
I'm too slow for workin' too fast
I don't do windows so honey don't ask
But I'm pretty good at drinkin' beer~
"Teams or two tables?" Eric asked.
"You only want teams because you think you'll be able to beat me with Donna on yours." Hyde accused.
"Well... yeah, and you'd have Jackie, so, two disadvantages." Eric smirked.
Jackie huffed. "My Daddy has a pool table, Eric. I know how to play."
"Wait... in your house?" Eric faltered.
"Yes. Shall we play for money?" Jackie asked, eyes glittering.
Donna snorted at her boyfriend's befuddled and nervous expression.
"Uh... let's just play for fun... we wanna go easy on you women..." Eric said with fake bravado.
"Right..." Hyde snickered.
"Well, if you feel that way about it, I think Jackie and I should take you two on." Donna snapped at him.
"I... what?"
Jackie clapped her hands. "Yay, that sounds so fun!"
"Put down a dollar each, boys." Donna said in her I'm determined to prove something because I'm a feminist voice.
Hyde gave a scowl to Eric. The message was clear: Foreman, what have you done?
~A go getter-
Well, maybe I'm not
I'm not known for doin' a lot
But I do my best work when the weather's hot
I'm pretty good at drinkin' beer
So hand me one more
That's what I'm here for
I'm built for having a ball
I love the nightlife
I love my budlight
I like 'em cold and tall~
Donna broke, and two balls went in. Then three more, but then she scratched. Eric smirked.
"Heh, heh, heh... I'm up."
"You kidding, Foreman?" Hyde said with an eyeroll. "I'll go."
Eric nodded. "Right, right..."
Donna whispered in Jackie's ear, and as Hyde started to take his shot, Jackie bent way down, using her shoulders and upper arms to give Hyde an eyefull of breasts, causing him to knock the cueball into another player at another table.
"Hey, watch it, dummy!" the irate trucker snapped.
Hyde winced, taking it. "Right... sorry..." he mumbled, and gave Jackie a look.
"That was cheating..."
"I didn't do anything..." Jackie said innocently, and Donna had the same innocent smile.
"Right..." Hyde said, shaking his head.
"Okay, it's Jackie's shot." Donna said, and Jackie grabbed the stick, bending way forward to line up her shot.
"Hyde... distract her like she did you!" Eric whispered into his ear.
Hyde waved him off. "First off- we're men, personal space, Foreman." he whispered. "Second: Girls are not wired the same way?"
Eric nodded. "Right, right..."
Hyde watched her lean back, but then he noticed the table behind them noticing her, and a guy taking his pool stick to lift the back of her skirt...
~I wasn't born for diggin deep holes
I'm not made for pavin long roads
I aint cut out to climb high line poles
But I'm pretty good at drinkin beer
I'm pretty good at drinkin beer~
Hyde reached out and threw A pool ball at the guy, nailing him in the clavicle. He dropped to his knees, and Hyde rushed over, punching him loudly in the face. Jackie's eyes were huge.
"What-"
Eric quietly explained, but then the guy's friends started surrounding Hyde, and Jackie gave Eric a shove. "Go help him!" she ordered, and raced over to Kelso and Fez, shoving them into the fray with, "Go help Steven!"
Jackie raced back to beside Donna, who was watching the boys fight- and not particularly well against the much larger, older men, whose friends seemed to keep coming out of the woodwork. Either that, or they were just getting jostled and joining the fight because of that, the girls couldn't tell by this point. Worried, Donna grabbed a pool stick and jumped into the fray herself. Jackie started to, but felt herself grabbed from behind by a strong pair of hands. Hands that felt coarse and smelled like tobacco and gasoline.
She struggled as she felt herself being lifted. "Steven! Help!" she screamed.
Hyde disentangled himself from where he was, rushing towards her, but, the cops came racing in, pushing everyone back and slapping cuffs on everyone before he could get to Jackie...
Twenty minutes later, Hyde was pacing the over-packed cell like a caged werewolf.
"They took the girls to a different side..." he muttered, running a hand through his unruly curls nervously.
"Yeah, I'm... I'm sure they're okay..." Eric said, though a seed of doubt and worry was tugging at him as well.
"We should be worrying about ourselves!" Kelso said bluntly. "What about when they call our parents- what about when Eric's parents get here?"
"Oh... no..." Eric sighed, leaning his forehead against the bars...
Meanwhile, Jackie was sitting with Donna, talking to the Police Sergeant.
"Really, please, don't be angry and call anyone! Some creep tried to get grabby with me, and Steven- my boyfriend- was just protecting me! Honest!" Jackie said, tears flowing down her cheeks.
"Yes, and the other guys just jumped in because he was outnumbered." Donna finished. "Really, you can ask them, that's all that happened."
The Sergent gave a nod to another uniformed officer, who went down to the boys' cell.
"Which one of you is Steven Hyde?" He asked.
Hyde walked forward nervously.
"What exactly happened, son?"
Hyde closed his eyes, swallowed hard. "Look, some asshole was tryin' to make moves on my girl, okay? And, apparently he had more friends than he deserved..."
The uniformed officer sighed, unlocking the door. "All right, your story pretty much matches your girlfriend's, so we're gonna let you off on self-defense, just pay a fine, which we're writing up for ya now."
"Where's Jackie? Is she okay?"
"She's right through them doors-"
And, Hyde practically knocked over the officer getting past him to rush to the Sergeant desk, and scooped Jackie into his arms.
"Steven..."
"You all right?" he asked, looking her over with worry written all over his face.
"Yeah, I'm f-ow." she hissed as his hand brushed over her hip.
Hyde frowned. "Ow is not fine."
"I think I might be a little bruised from when I got grabbed towards the end of it."
Hyde's fists clenched behind her back, and Jackie put her hands on his cheeks gently. "C'mon, why don't we go to my house, just you and me? My Dad's out of town, and my mom won't notice that you're there..."
Hyde lifted her into his arms and looked at the cop at the desk. "Can we go now?"
"Yeah, go ahead, son. The redhead has your paperwork."
Hyde nodded, walking Jackie out the door, the others following quietly.
Eric looked over at Donna when she sat next to him in the front seat.
"Are you-"
"Now you ask me? Now?"
"Well, I-"
"Too late; take me home."
"All right, then..." Eric said quietly...
Eric pulled off the car at Jackie's house. "Cover for me, I'm gonna crash here." Hyde said, and lifted Jackie out, carrying her inside.
"Her legs aren't broken, Hyde!" Donna called after him, laughing when she was rewarded by a rude gesture from Hyde.
Eric shook his head, pulling out of the windy driveway and started back towards home. "Donna... I'm... I really was worried about you too."
"I know." Donna sighed. "It just would've been nice to hear earlier."
"Well... a lot was going on and the police station freaks me out. But, I love you?"
"Yeah, yeah, take me home, you big girl." Donna grinned, and kissed his cheek, laying her head on his shoulder...
Meanwhile, Hyde walked Jackie upstairs to her bathroom and finally sat her down on the countertop. She smiled at him as he began filling up the bathtub with warm water, and walked over to her, slowly undressing her.
"Ooooh... that's nice..." she whispered playfully.
"No, no, you're gonna relax..." Hyde said softly, looking her over, drinking in every part of her.
He saw a few bruises, and ran gentle fingertips over them, feeling his anger flare more and more, until he bent down, kissing them tenderly.
"Oh, Steven..." she moaned. "My poor baby, you're way more beat up..." she cooed, stroking his cheek gently.
Hyde shrugged. "I'm fine. You're my girl, and nobody gets to touch you like that."
Jackie's eyes glowed. "Do you have any idea how hot you are right now?"
Hyde grinned, allowing her to take his shirt and glasses off of him. "Why don't you tell me?" he asked huskily.
"You're hotter than Clark Kent right now. My Superman..." she whispered, her delicate fingertips raking over his bare chest and abdomen.
"Come on, Lois," he chuckled, picking her up into his arms again. "I'll show ya why they call me Superman..."
And, Jackie laughed as they jumped into the tub, Hyde's pants still on, making a big splash. And, right then, Jacqueline Beulah Burkhardt had a revelation: Maybe all princes start as frogs, but not all frogs grow into princes. And now that Princess Jackie had found her Prince Steven... well... she wasn't about to let happily ever after slip out of her fingers ever again...
-The End-
