Disclaimer: I don't own Heavy Rain or the characters, but I do love them so I try not to hurt them (too badly) ;)
A/N - Thank you again to everyone for your reviews. I'm sorry I kept you all waiting so long for this chapter. Work had me so busy lately and then I had a bit of writer's block. But when I saw OnlySnakesCanLove had posted an update to her story the other day, I made it my motivation to finish this chapter before I would let myself read her new chapter. And damn, I can't wait to read her latest instalment to "Uploaded". So as soon as I post this, I'm off to read it. And to anyone who isn't reading her story "Uploaded", what the hell are you waiting for? Go do it now! (But after you read my chapter first.. lol)
I think there might be some OOC moments in this chapter with some of the dialogue, but I really just wanted to get this chapter posted so I could move on to the rest of the story. I also have been exploring some POV changes, as I'm trying to move into writing this story both from Norman and from Blake's point of views, so we'll see how that works. My apologies for any glaring grammatical issues with that.
Oh and an aside about the smut scene I wrote in the previous chapter. For clarity: it wasn't the first sex scene I ever wrote. I've written many a smutty sex scene back in the day for all my friends in High School and University, but this was my first published one I've shared with the world!
Bonus: This chapter explores some parts of Blake's background!
Rated M for swearing, masturbation and sexual activities between men.
Enjoy and please leave a review!
Thursday, October 6th, 2011
Agent Jayden found himself tied up in events beyond his control for much of the day. After getting picked up by the cab he got dropped off at Nathaniel's apartment and took possession of Blake's police-issue vehicle. Norman's own car was still parked at the precinct where he had left it the morning he and Carter had set out to question Nathaniel, but he decided it was only proper protocol to return Blake's car before he picked up his own wheels. Norman was tempted to stop by his motel room to secure some more Tripto from his stash and to change into his own more comfortable clothing, but he knew he risked another verbal chewing out from Captain Perry if he was any more late in getting to the station.
Norman's arrival at the precinct was met with a tongue lashing from Perry, just as he had suspected, not to mention some gentle good-natured ribbing at his unseemly choice of attire. It seemed like he was not making a good impression as a fashion plate, after coming in the previous morning covered in mud from his spills down the muddy hill at the Wasteland. But Jayden was there to get the job done, not to worry about what he looked like. Except his hair… he was always concerned about his hair!
The morning was spent in the debriefing room with Perry and Ash, as they went over the previous day's events that had led to Carter being shot. Perry was nonplussed at Norman's inaction during the standoff with Nathaniel and the Agent had no recourse or explanation to offer. How on earth could he ever explain to the Captain that while Blake had been staring down the barrel of crazy Nathaniel's M1911, he had been staring into the dark abyss of Tripto withdrawal. Norman's personal battle with his own internal demons had almost cost Carter his life, and according to the update Perry had received from the hospital that morning, the Lieutenant's survival was still not guaranteed. The two gunshot wounds Blake had suffered were severe and the doctors were monitoring him around the clock to ensure there were no complications from yesterday's surgery. The hospital would keep Captain Perry updated.
Against Perry's better judgement, he allowed Norman to remain on the Origami Killer case. Like he really had the authority to pull him off anyway; Jayden was part of the Fed's jurisdiction, but Perry could have filed a complaint with the FBI requesting the Agent be yanked. He just didn't want to have to deal with a new headache from Washington and so he decided to give Norman another chance. Perry partnered Jayden up with Ash and sent them off to continue with the investigation. The Captain also gave Norman his gun back, after Sergeant Perez had turned it in to ballistics and it came up clean. Perry warned Jayden, he better remember how to use the weapon properly the next time.
Spending the day with Ash on the case wasn't Norman's idea of the best use of his time. The Agent clearly felt he worked better on his own, but these were Perry's orders and Norman had orders from his own Director to follow the lead of the local police when working the case and to try not to step on too many toes. So Norman tagged along with Ash while they paid a visit to the psychiatrist of one of their lead suspects.
Norman didn't particularly enjoy working with Ash, but he didn't hate the mild-mannered detective either. Ash was a nice enough guy, but Jayden found him to be rather like tofu: bland, tasteless, with no real personality of his own. As much as Norman thought he hated working with Blake, he realized he missed the fiery spirit of the dark-haired Lieutenant, That visceral hatred that spewed forth, that rage that showed a passion burned deep within the Detective. Maybe it was anger, but Norman believed there was a passion for something more hidden below. Something that got Norman himself riled up… made him feel alive, more than Tripto had ever done for him. And he couldn't deny how just being in such close proximity to Blake made him feel all hot under the collar. Why did his body respond to Blake in this manner? Jayden had never been with another man but realized sexuality could be a very fluid thing. And as he thought more about his session in the shower that morning, he realized that it wasn't so much shame from masturbating to the image of another man, as it was about trying to understand why Carter specifically had flipped a switch inside his brain?
At first he had feared that he had made a mistake by not going back to his motel room in the morning to snag a vial of Tripto, but he actually hadn't been feeling any withdrawal symptoms from either the drug or the ARI. He couldn't deny how relaxed he felt since he had masturbated earlier that morning. Was it really so simple? Was sexual release the answer to all his physical and psychological symptoms?
Thursday, October 6th, 2011, 7:30pm
After a long day of working the case with Ash, the two men finally decided to call it quits for the evening. Norman was desperate to get back to his motel room, change into his own clothes, snort back some of his magical blue powder and get some much-needed rest in a comfortable bed. However, he still had one more stop to make before his guilty conscience was assuaged.
Jayden hadn't had an opportunity to use the ARI all day so luckily he hadn't experienced any ocular bleeding from overuse, but he could feel a blistering headache bubbling up behind his eyes and his intestines were grumbling in protest. The Agent was truly astonished that the withdrawal symptoms had been delayed by such a long period of time. It had been almost twenty-four hours since he last took the drug and his past history had him using three or four times a day.
It wasn't that Norman didn't want to use the ARI to assist him in investigating the case, but he was very hesitant to put the glasses back on again. He couldn't shake the remorse from his mind, that it was his lack of responsibility, his inaction that allowed the shooting incident to have occurred. All because he had frozen while walking the edge of that finely honed knife; stuck in between managing withdrawal symptoms from the Tripto and trying to keep a firm handle on the ARI side-effects. Norman wondered if Blake getting shot was the manifestation of him finally falling off that knife and losing complete control.
Back behind the wheel of his own government issued sedan, Jayden headed to the hospital. He needed to check on Carter and finally see the Detective with his own two eyes to make sure the man was really still alive. Parking his vehicle and walking to front desk, Jayden asked for Blake's room number, but was met with an angry looking administrator who informed him that Lt. Blake was in the ICU and could not have any visitors. Norman flashed his FBI badge and enlightened her that he was on official Government business. He loved abusing the little perks of his job and the woman pointed him in the right direction, but not without first grumbling about no-good Gov't bureaucrats. Norman smirked; it seemed that the woman had taken a page straight out of the official Carter Blake operating manual.
Following the woman's directions, Jayden made his way to the ICU and ran into Dr. Kardish. "Do you ever go home?" Norman good-naturedly asked the Dr.
Dr. Kardish chuckled, "I got off at seven this morning, went home and had a nap. Now I'm back on for another sixteen hour shift."
Norman made a face; he thought his job was bad.
"I assume you're here checking up on your partner?" the Dr. asked
"My what?" Norman choked. Sweet Jesus, does he think we're…. a couple? Instantly his mind flooded with all the sexual imagery he had fantasized about in the shower earlier that day.
"Lt. Blake?" said Dr. Kardish. "You're here to see how he's doing?"
Norman regained composure, immediately realizing the Dr. was talking about them being work colleagues, police partners. "Yes," he said, feeling his face flush bright red at how ridiculous he was being. Why is every little innuendo making me think about Carter?
"He actually woke up a few hours ago," said the Dr., gesturing for Norman to follow him, as he began to walk down the hospital corridor. "For the seriousness of his injuries we actually expected him to be unconscious for a much longer period of time after his surgery. But the man has the resilience of a cockroach. He's still a bit groggy but he was giving us a hard time,trying to pull out his IV's and other lines. We had to restrain him so he would settle down."
Norman rolled his eyes. "Oh, I'm sure he was thrilled with that," he said sarcastically.
"Most patients don't enjoy being restrained, but it's for his own good. He even tried to get out of bed at one point, but we can't even begin to entertain that until we can move him into a step-down unit," explained the Dr.
"And when would he be ready to move out of ICU?" Norman asked?
"Not until we remove his chest tube," Dr. Kardish explained. "But that won't be for a couple more days. We need to be sure all the fluid is drained from his lungs first."
The Dr. stopped walking and paused in front of an open room door. "Maybe you can talk some sense into him?"
Jayden let out a loud snort. "Ha!" he exclaimed. "That man is as stubborn as a bull and just as determined."
The Dr. sighed. "Well, Lt. Blake suffered some serious injuries and although I take pride in my skills as a surgeon, I do know it's going to take plenty of time before he can make a full recovery. But perhaps his stubbornness will serve him well. A positive attitude can make all the difference in the world for the patient's healing process."
"I wouldn't exactly call him positive," said Norman. "But he does usually make sure he gets whatever he wants."
"Every little bit helps," replied the Dr. He motioned toward the doorway. "Feel free to stay as long as you like, but try not to tax him too much with police work. He actually might be suffering from some temporary memory loss as a result of his trauma, but it shouldn't be anything too serious. I'd like him to focus on getting better, not trying to solve a murder case. I have other patients I need to check in on, but if you or Lt. Blake need anything just ring one of the nurses and they'll be happy to help you." Dr. Kardish walked off down the hallway, leaving Norman lingering outside the room, wondering what he was going to walk into.
Taking a deep breath, the Agent conjured up his courage and entered Blake's hospital room. It was a private room with a large exterior window overlooking the hospital courtyard. The room also had a large glass interior window inset on the right hand wall. Blake's bed was against the left hand wall with the footboard facing the interior window. The nurse's station was on the other side of the glass window, so they could easily keep an eye on the patient without having to leave their monitoring station.
Jayden walked into the room and saw Carter lying in the hospital bed. The Lieutenant's eyes were closed and his face seemed ghostly pale against the stark white pillow and sheets. An IV ran from his right arm to an IV stand on which hung two bags of saline. A shunt hung from the middle of the IV line for the nurses to administer morphine and other medication when necessary. Norman saw that Blake was topless underneath the sheets. The top blanket was pulled up just to below the Detective's pecs. He observed Blake's chest, his light brown, almost pink, nipples, slightly erect from the cool air in the hospital room, the thick dark hair covering his chest, and his tattoo proudly displayed on his right pec. The delicious sight made Jayden's mouth begin to water. Those nipples are just so damn … lickable! To see Carter so still and vulnerable again, just like when he was lying on the floor of Nathaniel's apartment, brought a plethora of feelings flooding back for Norman.
Blake's left arm was strapped across his chest in a sling and his right arm was strapped down to the bed with a restraint. And as Dr. Kardish had explained, Carter also had a chest tube exiting the left side of his abdomen, to keep his lung inflated for the time being. Instantly, all feelings of sexual arousal left Norman's body as he saw the seriousness of the injuries the cop had sustained, due to his own irresponsibility.
Careful not to wake up the Detective, Jayden slowly crossed the room and sat down in a chair by the side of Blake's bed. He didn't say a word, instead just watching the Lieutenant's chest rise and fall with each breath. Norman was taking it all in… the machines that were hooked up to Blake, beeping and monitoring his heart rate and other vital signs, the various liquids draining from the chest tube into a bottle at the side of the bed, the bandaged side of Carter's abdomen, his injured arm. …. Norman felt a bubble of remorse well up inside him and he knew this was all his fault. He let out a quiet sob and held his face in his hands, but he could hardly hold back the torrent of pain that quickly surged up.
The sound of Jayden's quiet weeping caused Blake to open his eyes. He saw Norman sitting in the chair by the side of his bed and wondered how long he had been sitting there.
"Fucking pussy," Blake began for an opening salvo. "What the fuck do you got to cry about?"
"Cartah?" said Norman. "Are you okay?" Norman sat up in his chair, wiping his face with the back of his hand.
"Am I okay?" repeated Blake. "What the fuck do you think? I was shot two times by a raving lunatic, and you just stood there with your head in the fuckin' clouds."
Norman hung his head. "I know, I know, I'm sowwy," he said.
Carter just stared incredulously at Jayden. "You're saw-wee?" he said, making fun of the Agent's annoying accent. "Seriously? Is that all you can say? You almost got me fucking killed!"
Norman didn't know what to say and started to stutter and stammer some kind of explanation, but the gibberish that left his mouth could hardly be considered English or intelligible. He looked down at his feet and scuffed his shoe against the tile floor, his body language taking on the appearance of a little boy being scolded by a schoolteacher. He knew he had done something wrong and had no good explanation for it.
"You god-damned cocky little FBI agent… coming here to MY precinct, taking over MY case, making ME look like a fucking incompetent fool, "Blake continued his vicious diatribe, not allowing Jayden to get a word in edgewise. "Then you get me fucking shot, cause you're too much of a pussy to shoot your fucking gun." Carter shook his head in disbelief, the anger and hostility painted as plain as day across his face. His eyes and mouth contorted in rage as he continued to spit out obscenities at the meek bureaucrat, whose head was hanging so low from the verbal abuse that he was practically prostrating before the Detective.
Blake pulled against the restraint on his good arm, practically bucking against the bed, in attempts to make some kind of violent, physical contact with Norman. "God damn it! Would you undo this fucking restraint? They're treating me like some common criminal!" Blake demanded.
Jayden's eyes widened with fear. He didn't want to get anywhere near the man's hands, for fear the Lieutenant's fist might make contact with his face. "Um, I don't know if that's such a good idea," stammered Norman.
"You fucking assho….." But before Carter could finish his curse, his facial expression changed and the corners of his lips curled up in a grin and then his entire mouth opened up into a wide-toothed laugh. "Oh my God, what the fuck are you wearing?" Blake guffawed as he let out a huge burst of laughter.
Confused, Norman lifted his head, taking a look at Carter and then giving his outfit a scrutinizing glance. Blake continued to laugh, until the heaving ripples of laughter moving through his body caused a sharp pain in his chest wound, and he suddenly bent over at the waist and gasped for breath.
Jayden stood up and rushed over to the bed, putting his hand on Blake's shoulder, "Are you okay, Cartah?" he asked, concerned the man had hurt himself. The instant his hand touched Carter's flesh, he felt as if a hot poker had seared the palm of his hand. Like being struck by lightning, Norman felt a sizzle of electricity move from the detective's skin, through his hand, up his arm and straight down to his groin, which fluttered in response.
"I'm fine, get the fuck off me," Carter spewed at him, shrugging his shoulders to remove himself from Jayden's touch. Norman immediately removed his hand, more so from the intensity of the feeling and less from Carter's barking command. He took a step back from the bed, his heart pounding and his head spinning at how quickly his body had reacted to just the mere touch of Carter's bare flesh.
"Those clothes, where did you get those? It looks like you're trying to play dress up?" Blake asked, snapping Norman from his reverie. The Agent knew the clothes were ill fitting. He looked down, taking in the short pants and the baggy shirt. "Wait a minute," said Blake, before Norman could explain. He squinted his eyes taking another good look at Jayden standing before him. "Those are my clothes? Why are you wearing my fucking clothes?" The anger began to rise in Blake's voice again.
"I uh," stammered Norman, "I waited at the hospital until you were out of surgery, but uh." Jayden felt a blush come over his pale cheeks, as he tried to come up with a good reason why he went to Carter's house last night, other than his own perverse curiosity. "The Dr. gave me your belongings and I uh… I wanted to make sure they were safe, so I um, uh… I had your keys, and…. Um…. I dropped them off at your house." Norman's face was flaming scarlet red now as he remembered his shower from earlier that morning. How on earth am I going to explain that I spent the night at his house?
Blake glared at Jayden, not impressed by the pathetic story the Agent was attempting to string together. Suddenly Norman looked up excitedly, "I fed your dog!" he announced, thinking Carter would be happy someone had looked after the animal.
At Norman's sudden announcement, Carter's entire demeanour changed, his face relaxed and his tone softened. His blue eyes lit up and a smile came over his face. "Cadence!" Blake exclaimed. "Oh my god, I forgot all about her. Is she okay?"
"She's fine," said Jayden. "I fed her and let her out to do her business. How old is she anyway? She seems a little worse for wear?" he asked.
Not being one to share a lot of personal details with co-workers, and especially not with this fuck-nugget FBI agent, Blake thought carefully before he chose his words. Cadence was his partner, his confident, his whole world. He had been paired up with the two-year-old German shepherd, eight years ago, when he was first accepted into the K9 unit. Once they had completed their training, the two worked for the city police Narcotics division providing drug sniffing at crime scenes, police roadside checks, the airport and even drug sweeps at local schools. Carter and Cadence, or C&C as they were known around the precinct, became an inseparable, unstoppable team.
Being a K9 handler, Carter was responsible for Cadence 24/7 and it didn't take long for a loving bond to grow between them. A bond that meant either one of them would put their life on the line for the other. And that's exactly what Cadence did for Carter. Four years ago, during a routine police roadside check, Blake was walking the dog up the line of vehicles that was stopped, while another officer spoke to each driver as they slowly inched their way to the front of the line. Cadence sniffed out a stash of cocaine in one vehicle and after she alerted Carter and he began to make his way over to the car, the driver got spooked by the dog and pulled out a gun. Blake moved to pull out his own piece while he shouted a warning for the guy to put down his gun. But the driver, who, they later found out, was high on crystal meth, was even quicker to aim his gun at Carter. Cadence turned out to be the quickest of them all, and she jumped and tackled Blake just as the driver fired his weapon, putting herself between her handler and the danger. Cadence took the bullet straight through her left hind leg, but she had saved Carter's life. By the time the dog and the officer had hit the ground, the other police on the scene had stepped in, disarmed and apprehended the shooter.
Carter was fine, aside for some bruising where the dog had landed on his chest, but the same couldn't be said for Cadence. Even after surgery and antibiotics, she was never the same. She had developed a limp after her leg had healed and with such a lack of mobility she was declared unfit for active duty. Carter decided to keep Cadence as a pet after she was retired from the police force, and he immediately quit the K9 unit, choosing instead to enter Homicide.
"She's almost ten years old, but she's been through a lot," explained Carter. "She used to be in the K9 unit."
"No kidding," said Norman. "Was she yours?" Jayden found it extremely difficult to imagine Blake being a K9 handler. He knew that only the most dedicated officers were considered for K-9 units. They had to have exemplary records, plenty of arrests with convictions, an outgoing, energetic personality, and strong physical conditioning. Norman couldn't argue that Blake certainly had the physical conditioning; the man was built like a brick shit-house. But as for the other criteria? It was doubtful at best.
"Yeah," said Blake, "About eight years ago I got accepted into the K9 unit. Cadence was my first partner… well… uh…" he stammered. "My only partner really. We worked Narcotics."
Norman let out a snicker. "Ha! You were a NARC?"
Blake just glared at him but didn't respond. "She got shot in the line of duty and had to be retired. I couldn't bare to see her be put down, so I got to keep her."
"But you're in Homicide. What happened?" asked Jayden, curious about why Blake had switched career paths.
"I quit K9. I couldn't do it without Cadence. She… uh…." Blake stopped, a lump gathering in his throat. Norman could see a slight dampness gathering in the corners of the man's eyes. "I couldn't stand to raise another dog, ... to get…..." Carter trailed off.
"…. to get that close again," Norman finished Carter's sentence quietly under his breath.
Wow. Blake actually does have a softer side. It was clear to Jayden's profiler instinct that Blake shared a special relationship with Cadence. He could tell how close the Detective was with the dog and he wondered what had happened that she got shot. But the Agent knew better than to keep probing for information. He was just thankful that with the attention turned to Cadence, Blake seemed to have forgotten about his original question as to why Jayden was wearing the Lieutenant's clothes.
"Her spirit was broken and she's never been the same. She can't run and play like she used to," Blake continued.
Norman glanced at the older man and saw the tenderness in his eyes, surprised at the vulnerability that Carter was showing. But he knew that shouldn't have lasted for long, as the Detective interrupted Norman's thoughts with another angry outburst. "How the fuck did you even get close to Cadence?" Blake asked. "I mean, she is a loveable animal but only around people she knows and trusts."
"I had stopped at Mickey Dee's on my way over to your house," Jayden explained. "I had a Big Mac and it seemed to subdue her."
Blake laughed, again his gruff exterior melting away at the thought of his dog. "Oh my God, I used to give her a Big Mac once a week as a treat. I knew it wasn't good for her, but she worked so damn hard. She had such a weakness for those burgers." He smiled and then looked down. "She and I both," he continued.
Jayden glanced over at Blake's form lying underneath the white hospital sheets, the man's stomach flat as a board. "Oh yeah, looks like you have a serious junk food problem," he joked, remembering the sight of the Lieutenant's naked chest in Nathaniel's apartment when he gave him CPR the day before. "You could wash laundry on your abs." Oh shit, did I just say that out loud?
"What the fuck is wrong with you?" Blake burst out angrily. "You are such a fag!"
Norman averted his eyes from Carter's body and took a step away from the bed, mentally wishing to put as much distance between the two of them as possible. "I am not a …. fag." said Norman, having difficulty even saying the crass sounding word.
"Denial ain't just a river in Egypt," cracked Blake.
Jayden chuckled sarcastically, "Ha ha, very funny," he responded. "I told you, I'm not a fag!" he said a little more harshly.
"You sure fooled me, you cock-sucking queer," sneered Carter, the venom in his words stinging the Agent's pride just a little bit. "I know you were all over me, the Doc told me you gave me CPR. Ripped my clothes off and couldn't wait to get your lips on mine. Fucking homo!" Blake took a big inhale and then actually spat a ball of phlegm in Norman's general direction, just barley missing the man's pant leg.
Disgusted at the Detective's vile behaviour, Jayden began to walk towards the door. "I saved your fucking life Blake!" he shouted.
"But it was your fault I was fucking shot in the first place!" Blake yelled back at the Agent. But Jayden didn't intend to stick around any longer to argue with the man and he was already out of the room and down the hallway.
"Fucking asshole!" Carter screamed after him, remnants of spit flying from his mouth into the air. His heart was racing and he could feel his pulse pounding in his ears. He knew his blood pressure was up and instantly one of his monitors began to sound an alarm. Within seconds a nurse raced into the room. "Mr. Blake!" she reprimanded him as she silenced the monitor. "You're going to have to calm down." She pulled her stethoscope from around her neck and placed the cool chest piece to Carter's chest to listen to his heart.
Blake growled deep in his throat. "Don't tell me to calm down," he hissed as politely as he knew how. "And while you're at it, get me out of these fucking restraints!"
Thursday, October 6th, 2011, 10:48pm
Jayden set on the edge of the bed in his motel room, holding his head in his hands. After the hysterical blow-up with Blake he had fled the hospital, making a quick stop in on Cadence to feed and water the animal. Even if the two men didn't see eye-to-eye, Norman wasn't going to let the dog starve to death.
But now, here he sat, going over the events of the past two days in his head. And despite the painful headache that had come on slowly over the course of the day, like his head was being clamped in a vise, squeezing ever more tightly as each hour had passed while he worked the case with Ash, the Agent had had no other Tripto or ARI related withdrawal symptoms. Then, miraculously, the headache had disappeared after his visit to Blake in the hospital.
Norman picked up a small blue vial that was sitting on the nearby nightstand and rolled the cool glass tube around in his fingers. He felt no addictive urges to take the powerful drug, when normally just the sight of the blue powder was enough to make him snort back a noseful. Had it really been more than a day since he had last had a hit?
Setting the vial back on the nightstand, he lay down on his back on the bed, still dressed in Blake's ill-fitting clothes. Was it the jerking off in the shower that had subdued his cravings for Tripto? No, that's ridiculous. But Norman couldn't deny that anytime he had been around Carter, his body had responded in an uncontrollable way. And every time he walked away, he felt a powerful rush of endorphins and hadn't needed to take a hit of the drug. He couldn't even begin to verbalize how he felt. It disgusted him and pleased him all at the same time. Norman closed his eyes, but all he could picture was Blake lying in the hospital bed, looking weak and vulnerable. His crotch tingled in response and Norman let out a weak moan.
Before Jayden was a trained profiler, he questioned every decision he made, every feeling and emotion that crossed his mind. Even from a very young age, it was what made him get into the study of psychology in the first place. He analyzed to death every date or physical contact he ever had with a girl. 'Why did she say that?' 'What did she mean by that'? 'Why did he do that?' 'Was her lack of emotion a reflection on him'? 'Was he searching for a mother figure?'
In fact, if Norman had paid closer attention he would have realized his overanalysing was probably the reason why all his relationships had failed, rather than from him being so busy studying in University. So now he couldn't help but question why did he had such an overwhelming attraction to Carter - the raging fireball, jam-packed full of testosterone? What did that say about Norman? Was he looking for father figure? Carter was far from fatherly, with all the the arguing and the bickering, but it did make Norman feel alive. Was that what he was looking for?
After so many years of Tripto use, had he burnt out all his old brain synapses and neural pleasure pathways? He was always chasing that last high and he usually needed Tripto just to feel normal. But now here was Carter making him experience feelings he had never felt before; taking him to a height he could remember only from the first time he had tried Tripto.
Jayden shook his head; he had to stop second-guessing everything. He feared he was going to drive himself mad if he continued to keep questioning his reaction to the Detective. Besides it's not like Carter has any feelings for me. He thinks I'm a fag.
Norman could hear the older man's words echo through his mind again. 'Cock-sucking queer.' He smiled and his penis twitched. A flash of blood soared into his groin as Norman imagined how Carter would enjoy a little cock sucking of his own. Even despite the cruelty and anger that Carter had shown towards the Agent, Jayden couldn't help but imagining himself crawling up into that big hospital bed and licking Blake's soft, brown nipples. Sucking each perfectly, little round disc into his mouth and teasing each nipple into a firm, erect peak with his teeth. Norman's growing erection began to strain against the fabric of his pants and he reached over and undid the zipper and slid his pants off his legs. He tossed the clothes on the floor and got under the bed sheets and closed his eyes again.
He wrapped one hand around his firm member, blood pulsing through the thick veins, causing his erection to bob and weave in his grasp. Again, imagining himself in the hospital bed with Blake, he threw one leg over the man's body so he was straddling the man's lower legs. The Detective started to put up a bit of a struggle but Norman placed one hand over the man's mouth. With his injured left arm subdued in a sling and his right arm done up in the hospital restraints, Blake was completely vulnerable. A big grin came over Norman's face as he realized he could do whatever he wanted to the man and Carter couldn't stop him.
Looking down, Jayden saw that he wasn't wearing any pants. His arousal was demanding attention but then he noticed that Blake had pitched a tent of his own. The white bed sheet was bulging upwards, Carter's own erection bobbing and seeking release. Norman shifted his weight and walked his knees forward a little so that he was no longer sitting on Carter's knees and shins, but rather straddling the man's thighs. He leaned forward and brought his crotch so very close to Blake's erection; the thin hospital sheet was the only thing keeping the two men from touching. Blake groaned something but it was muffled behind Norman's hand. The Agent didn't dare move his hand but then he felt something wet. Carter had begun to gently lick his palm, the rough hairs of his goatee tickling his flesh, feeling almost like the sandpapery tongue of a little kitten.
Norman moaned, imagining the man's wet tongue licking his penis instead of his hand. He shifted his weight carefully again, this time making very slight contact between his groin and Carter's erection through the sheets. He felt the massive bulge and when he looked down, Jayden could practically see the thick, throbbing veins on Carter's member standing out even through the thin hospital sheet. A damp stain appeared on the fabric at the head of Blake's penis, as pre-cum began to leak from the tip. Norman's mouth watered and he licked his lips, he was aching to get his tongue on that beast, not to mention to finally lay eyes on it.
Carter apparently shared Jayden's feelings, as he moved from licking Norman's palm, to taking first the Agent's index finger in his mouth and then his middle finger as well. He slowly moved his tongue up and down Norman's fingers, swirling around his fingertips, slobbering plenty of saliva down over Jayden's fingers and palm. Licking his lips, Blake looked at Jayden, his blue eyes hungry and his chest heaving with deep panting breaths. Norman could barely hold on any longer and he crushed himself against Carter's groin, their two erections grinding together. Norman tilted his hips, rubbing himself hungrily against Carter's penis through the sheet. Grunting in anticipation, he threw his head back and closed his eyes, continuing to grind himself on top of the older man. He felt the pressure building up between his legs and as Carter continued to lick and slurp at his fingers, Norman could only imagine the man's tongue lapping at the head of his penis, his facial hair rubbing briskly over his inner thighs. The visual image was too much and Norman felt himself climax. His face clenched in pleasure from his release and he groaned from the intensity. Panting, Norman felt his abdominal muscles pulse with each contraction and when his orgasm had finally subsided, he opened his eyes. A little bit stunned and surprised, Norman realized he was back in his hotel room. He looked down and saw he was holding his now limp organ in his hand and his stomach was covered in his own semen.
Standing up, Jayden padded over to the bathroom in his bare feet to clean himself off. He washed his stomach and hands, splashed his face with water and then looked at himself in the mirror. Letting out a deep breath, Norman ran his hands through his hair. His face was flushed and he felt a little wave of nausea overtake him briefly, as he realized for the second time in twenty-four hours that he had masturbated to fantasies of Lt. Carter Blake. Shaking off his revulsion, he headed back to the bed. Fluffing up his pillow and laying back down, he couldn't argue with the fact that he now felt more relaxed than ever. And as the sandman quickly took him off to slumber land, Norman couldn't suppress his ear-to-ear grin, as another fantasy about Carter Blake filled his dreams.
A/N - de gustibus non est disputandum means "In matters of taste, there is no argument"
I think that's a very fitting title for this chapter and something Norman is clearly struggling with. It's also the story of my life! *snicker*
