Now that there is someone I actually know in person, the motivation perhaps will be stronger to write more frequently (like I used to…) Anyhow… So this chapter goes out to Lotan who's been begging me, in my own words to, "DO ET" already.
PS this chapter turned out way differently than I thought it would… sigh. More drama… it may shatter your heart but I promise to pick up the pieces at some point…. D:
BangBangTheory reference in this one.
Chapter 6
Biking home proved rather uncomfortable for Naomi, considering it was rush hour in Bristol, and she was outside, in public, wearing her pajamas… She didn't understand the people who went to grocery stores in pajama pants and she probably never would. She didn't even realize that she was biking faster than she would regularly, however, Gina did, hence the surprised look on her mother's face when she got home.
"Well, that was quick…" Gina threw a knowing smile in the direction of her daughter who was stood in the doorway, debating what to do next.
"What?" Naomi was too lost in her own thoughts to even hear her Mum. She saw her mother shake her head amused and point upstairs. She took the hint and tried to ignore the motherly judging that was going on, even if Gina wasn't saying anything out loud. She kept her steps on the staircase quiet, remembering that Emily scares easily, and knocked on her closed bedroom door. She smiled to herself realizing she shouldn't have to knock on her own door, but just stood there waiting for some kind of response that she could enter.
"Come in." Emily's muffled voice sounded distant, behind the door.
For a moment Naomi hesitated, unsure exactly what she was proposing to do once she saw Emily… She hadn't planned anything out, and was becoming increasingly nervous and frustrated with herself for not being able to know what she wanted like she usually did. Right now, she assumed she just wanted to restore things to normality after a crazy morning, so she went into her room with a confidence she convinced herself was real, thinking maybe a pat on the back and a few words along the lines of 'there, there' would do the trick.
The confidence was swept away when she saw Emily's back poking out from the covers of her bed. Emily turned around to face her, her brown eyes looking at Naomi as equally unsure of what to say. The only thing Naomi knew was that her heart was doing something she could only assume was along the lines of 'swooning', a feeling completely unfamiliar to her. She brushed the thought aside and stepped forward as if she were in a trance. Her mind was completely captured by the cute little button nose and brown eyes in front of her. She looked lower and saw that there was a frown on the girl's face, and something inside of her shrunk.
"Emily…" She said the only word that was on her mind, giant font, bold text and all…
"I thought you were Gina…" Emily whispered.
Shrunk, shriveled and died was that new feeling. Naomi felt hurt, like a harsh blow to the gut only this was far worse than any physical pain. A reminder once again, that she may not be able to help Emily as much as her mother could. She would just be another meaningless object in this girl's life, despite the fact that for once, she may feel differently about the whole situation. The feeling needed to leave, and it needed to leave now. It was as if an entirely different person took over the blonde girl's soul and removed any of the painful insecurities and replaced them with standoffish rude behavior.
"Yeah, well, sorry to disappoint…" Naomi scoffed, subconsciously folding her arms defensively in front of her. Her new self wavered for a moment when she saw Emily's lip quiver before turning into an angry grimace.
"Can we just pretend what happened before, well, didn't?" Emily pulled the covers up a little closer to her face, her voice was shaky.
"It happened, Emily. It's fucking reality, not everyone is perfect, get used to it." Naomi looked away from the shocked brown eyes that went from soft to hard the second she finished her statement. She knew it was a low blow, but her statement held more truth than she could imagine. What she didn't know was that she was talking more about herself, than whoever she thought caused Emily such pain.
"Right. Fine then… this is me realistically asking you to leave me alone, kay?" That time Naomi couldn't look away from the harsh venom beneath Emily's words.
"You're in my fucking bedroom, you can't make me leave." Naomi was pissed, even though she knew it wasn't justified. She wasn't allowed to get mad at this girl for not accepting her anger and being the sad and quiet girl she expected. Still, she showed no signs of giving in to the girl lying in her bed.
"Fine, stay I don't give a fuck." Emily turned around, away from Naomi as if to put more distance between them without actually moving any further.
"Fuck it, stay in my bed, we don't need your wallowing, psychotic, ass at the table. I'll be down eating breakfast." Naomi was at a loss for words and that was the best she could come up with. She didn't even bother to shut the door behind her, just set her jaw while sighing, and left the room.
She came downstairs fuming with anger, somewhat annoyed that she couldn't control it. It wasn't an anger that she could just lock away in a draw and move past, it was an anger that was nagging her, telling her she should be mad at herself not Emily. Frustrated by trying to do the right thing and having it turn out so wrong she ends up kicking a small table near the entryway. "FUCKING-SHITTING-HELL-CUNTING-BASTARD!"
Naomi clutched her throbbing toes, a lot more pissed off at herself for being so stupid… as if kicking a table would fix anything… Gina's head poked out of the kitchen to see what the ruckus was, "Jesus Naomi, I thought you fell down the steps."
"I wish I did…" Naomi mumbled.
"Come have some breakfast, love." Gina didn't hear what Naomi mumbled, but she knew something was off. Naomi wasn't one to take out emotion on inanimate objects so something clearly was bothering the girl.
With a slight limp, Naomi managed to get herself into the kitchen and sit properly at the table. She saw the familiar sight of newspaper being held up at one end of the table. The familiar grumbles of an Irish accent that she heard so frequently now. Gina placed down a plate of eggs and toast in the center of the table, and then a large bowl of hash browns by the man with the newspaper help up to his face.
"Kieran, food's ready. Help yourself." Gina said, before taking a seat next to him and helping herself to some of the eggs.
Naomi watched as the newspaper was folded up, and behind it appeared the bearded bastard who had become her mother's boyfriend over the past few months. He wasn't all that bad, Naomi appreciated his morbid feeling for everything in life. It was odd to Naomi though, because her mother was probably very far from that sort of way of thinking.
The younger blonde dropped her fork and nearly gasped, "What the fuck happened to your face?" Kieran's face was covered in bruises and there were wads of cotton sticking out of his nose.
"A little fucker decided to take a piss on me… and I took it…"
"I'm glad you didn't fight back, love." Gina smiled at her boyfriend.
"What the fuck? You just let yourself get beat up?" Naomi was outraged by the stupidity. She couldn't imagine that he let himself get beat up…. Nobody should let that happen to themselves…
"It was a fucking girl, Naomi. A teenage girl, don't think I'd be here for breakfast if I took a swing…" He mumbled as he scooped a nice pile of the greasy potatoes onto his plate.
Everyone went silent the moment they heard a gasp come from the doorway. Emily was standing there with a look of horror, just staring at Kieran, her eyes reddened from crying. It took Naomi about five seconds to figure out what was going on, not to mention Emily shouting, "What the FUCK are you doing here?" and disappearing out of the room, was a good enough hint.
Naomi turned to Kieran for some sort of explanation even though she had a crystal clear idea of exactly who did this to him now. He just sighed and shrugged before taking another bite of his potatoes. When he saw Gina and Naomi still looking at him expectantly he chuckled and said, "What were the odds of that, eh?"
Gina shook her head and turned her attention to Naomi, "Why don't you go see if Emily's alright…?"
"Sure, because I have to fix all the bullshit in this fucking house…" Naomi complied to her Mum's wish despite the retort she made on her way out. Gina knew better than to take it to heart, and she already knew Naomi probably wanted to check on Emily, just needed a bit of a push.
Stood by the door, Naomi took a deep breath and opened the door, not bothering to knock this time. She saw Emily sobbing hard and having difficulty taking in breaths of air, on the edge of her bed, facing away from her. Despite her pride she made the next few steps forward until she was sitting next to Emily who didn't seem to care she was there.
"I didn't want to… do it. I couldn't control it, it was like I wanted to hurt him for everything that's happened to me? I shouldn't have done it… I just… I was…" Emily looked up into Naomi's eyes pleading for words to come to her and help her explain. The blonde bites her lip holding herself back from crying while her own eyes look over the wet and swollenness of the girl's face, tears streaming down onto the girl's lap. "I'm so sorry… I just… can you understand?" Emily asked.
"I can try to." Naomi whispered while pulling Emily close into a hug. Like her mother, she held tight to Emily, knowing that the damage already done was worse than the pain Emily was getting from her arm. "I'm sorry about before Emily… I just…"
"It's okay, I'll try to understand."
Naomi pulled away and wiped a tear that was on the edge of Emily's face. "Emily, why… Kieran?"
"I knew him before… he came to my house one time… and I thought… never mind, it's stupid."
"Emily, stop that. This isn't stupid…"
Emily looked down ashamed, "I thought he was going to take me away from them… for years I imagined what it would be like to do magic shows with him. I would go to other parties that he did and make friends and he would make small talk with the other parents about how proud he was of me. I thought he would rescue me, be my new family… I thought he knew how bad it was… and I hated him for that. And when she you know… hit me, I though it was because of him. Maybe she thought he would take me from her, and she wanted to show me I was wrong… so wrong."
"I'll be right back, okay Emily?" Naomi waited for Emily to nod, wiping away one more tear before disappearing out the door. She returned a minute later a little out of breath with a large plate of food and two glasses of orange juice. "Food for the soul."
She could've sworn she saw a small smile for a second on Emily's face. She set the food down on her bed and took out two forks she had stowed in her pocket. Giving one to Emily, she took a bite of the eggs. Emily stared at Naomi and the food silently. "Well come on, have a bite." Naomi said, sliding some of the food towards Emily.
"But you… only have one plate."
"What's mine is yours. This is me showing you I can share. I can share my bed, my room, my clothes, my food, and my family. Unless you want your own that is…"
Emily's face lit up. Sharing was a foreign concept to her, no matter what was being shared. The blame was always one hundred percent hers, and the things she wanted were always, only everyone else's. It took a nod of encouragement before she grabbed a bite of the hash browns, (Naomi had to use Gina's look of 'do the right thing' on Kieran to get some…).
The look of heaven on the smaller girl's face was enough to make Naomi smile. Clearly Emily hadn't been properly introduced to the possibilities of what good food could taste like. She was sure to leave most of the food for the smaller girl, but still took a bite every now and then so as not to make Emily feel uncomfortable about eating.
"Fuck, that was good." Emily mumbled staring down at the empty plate, while rubbing her stomach.
"If you think that was good, just wait until I take you to one of the fancy dine ins in the city." Naomi blushed, immediately regretting the way that sounded more like she was asking Emily out on a date than comparing the quality of home-cooking to a restaurant.
"You don't have to… do that." Emily looked down, back to her shy self.
"I want to." Naomi sat up straighter, back to her confident self. "Sometime soon, for that matter… if you aren't busy, that is…? However first, I'd like you to meet my friends… There happens to be a party I was going to ditch on tomorrow that I could take you to… I already have been hearing how they were all planning on going. It's the perfect place."
"Wouldn't that bother you?"
"Why would it bother me?"
"I'd be in the way…"
"No, Emily, I want you to come, if you want to come. You can't be in the way unless I didn't want you there. So stop making excuses and tell me you'll come." Naomi genuinely smiled.
Emily's face lit up, it didn't bother her that Naomi was being bossy, because this was all with good intentions. Better than good intentions, kind, caring, and friendly intentions… nobody had done that for her, and like Mrs. Sheffer said, denying herself good opportunities was a horrible thing, so she did the only thing she could do; smile and nod like a loon.
"Great, now that that's sorted allow me to introduce you the shower…" Naomi smirked.
"Fuck off, I've showered before." Emily scowled.
"Ah yes, but none are like the great shower of Nindahi…"
"Who the hell is Nindahi? Some sort of fucking myth-legend type person you're mocking?"
"No, Nindahi was the Mexican bloke who installed it…" Naomi winked triumphantly coaxing Emily out of the room.
"You're so full of bullshit sometimes."
"Yeah, well…" Naomi looked at Emily while she pulled out a few towels from a closet, "yeah. Guess so." Both fell into a fit of laughter at Naomi's profound response…
There, I know it's a bit short… yeah it has a range of all the emotions. But I kinda liked it. Naomi would be quick to push away the drama and find distractions. Distractions, distractions, distractions are what she's best at… we'll just have to see how Emily cope's with Naomi's way of dealing with things.
TOOTLES. See you next time.
Apologies again for taking so effin long.
