A/N: I cannot thank all of you enough for reviewing, it really makes my life a bit happier. We reached 21 reviews, so thank you all so much. At this point, I'm going to keep up with the story, but the events will probably be more spaced out (graduation possibly, the ride home on the Hogwarts Express, the wedding, some time with Harry, and I think I might write a death scene…I know…sad) so if there is any event or idea anyone wants incorporated into the story just put it into a review or a PM.
Also, as I'm wrapping this up in the next few months, I'd like to just let all of you know that I do take story challenges or requests. In fact, I think that they're a lot of fun, so get those brains thinking. I have no problem branching out to different ships besides LilyxJames or different scenarios. Let me know!
Please Read and Review. Your reviews really encourage me to write a lot faster!
Lily POV
When it came down to it, forgiving James had been easy. I had expected it to be something that I would do eventually, but after pondering it for a bit and making James promise me various things so that something like this would never happen again. But the moment he opened up to me in the dorm room, something changed. I really had never seen him that vulnerable, and knowing that I was the reason he was in that state broke down my defenses completely.
That was the moment I had been waiting for. The time when he would realize that I didn't need something flashy, I needed something that would show me that he was capable of letting me in and showing me that he actually cared. Saying it was one thing, showing me was another, and then singing it? Merlin I melted. I had actually heard the song before; my father was a White Stripes fan. When he had started that verse I had inwardly cringed. The song was about competing with another girl after all, and I couldn't help but wonder if we was going for a "let's talk about my cheating to fix this" approach. But the lyrics took on a whole new meaning coming from James…being about me.
I had always seen myself as a pretty girl, but not someone overly attractive or beautiful even. To hear from James that I was beautiful beyond compare startled me. No one had ever expressed something like that to me before. I had heard that I was a freak from my non-supportive sister, that I was "wicked foxy" from a few boys after a few too many Butterbeers or a Firewhiskey, or that I was a vile Mudblood slag that didn't deserve to breathe the same air as whoever was making the comment. Beautiful was new territory. Beautiful made me light up inside and the walls crumbled further.
And then he had sealed the deal and told me that he loved me, his voice a bit cracked from the emotion that he obviously was uncomfortable with me seeing. But he chose to say it anyway, to let me see that he could be trusted, that he was sincere.
What else could a girl do at that point but say yes?
The kiss that had followed was long overdue, but I think it made it that more special. I certainly would remember it for a very long time. Of course, that could also be because of what had happened next…
…I leaned into the kiss with a ferocity caused by the passion and tension that had been boiling between the two of us for over a month. Finally, everything was fixed, and I didn't need to think anymore. I didn't have to do anything besides enjoy James. Kiss James. Don't think, just do.
James reached forward and circled my waist with his muscled arms, pulling me forwards so that I was seated in his lap. Running my fingers through his hair, I moved my lips to place small nips down his jaw to the spot on his neck that when lightly sucked on caused him to hum with delighted pleasure. It had been too long.
He pulled his neck away from my eager lips after a moment, wishing to repay the favor. He lifted me off of his lap and pushed me down onto his stacked pillows for a bit more comfort. His arms slid from my lower back to my stomach, bunching my shirt a bit. I savored the feeling of his hands touching my skin as I-
The door flew open.
"James, have you seen that bloody essay I was writing it's due tomorrow and I can't seem to fi…" Remus cut off abruptly as he looked up for the first time since entering the room and took in the rather compromising position that the two of us were in, my look of utter embarrassment, and James' glare that could have killed if it had the power. "I'll just…er…leave now," he stuttered, backing towards the door. As he turned to leave, cheeks a bit pink, he froze.
James was halfway through his angry snort that was sure to have a snappy comment attached to it when he heard it as well. Heavy footsteps that sounded even closer than they must have been when Remus had first heard them. Before I had a chance to pull down my shirt a fix my hair to a "I-was-not-just-snogging-my-boyfriend-in-his-bed" state, the door flew open again and the other two Marauders tumbled through.
Sirius was a magnet for any kind of mayhem or embarrassing moments and had his eyes on us within a second of detecting the awkward silence in the room. Peter followed his gaze after a few more seconds, his face turning red in an instant. Sirius, of course, spoke first.
"Well Prongs, bout time you got around to getting a shag."
I laughed even now at the memory. At the time I had been horrified and began sputtering things about how we had just been talking, though I had been cut off fairly quickly. After a quick and nondescript explanation about what happened to his friends, James had excused himself and we had gone down to the kitchens, his apatite suddenly back now that his heartbreak and sorrow has dissipated.
Of course after that, I had insisted that we go to class. There was no reason for us to be skiving off any more than we had already, seeing as that N.E.W.T.S were coming up in about a month at the time. James had laughed at that, but I was fairly certain during the next few weeks leading up to the exams he and the other Marauders were very happy to have my study techniques around and my diligent notes. Everyone had to study, even if they did have an enormous amount of natural talent. Peter probably benefitted from my study sessions the most.
The dreaded N.E.W.T.S eventually passed, and then we were rushing through graduation and packing up seven years of accumulated junk from under beds and finding lost textbooks that we had left in the Room of Hidden Things.
That was where I was presently, standing in front of the Room of Hidden Things, reminiscing about the seven years that I had spent at Hogwarts. A small cough from behind me stirred me from my thoughts.
"Something about the wall funny Evans?" James asked, wrapping his arms around my waist.
I turned my head and smiled up at him. "No, just…remembering."
"Remembering what, love?"
"This. The castle and all of the memories that I've had here. I never really fit in back home, you know? With Petunia and feeling like something was missing from my life, and then I end up here, with all of these people who are just like me. It's more of a home than any house I've lived in, and now, we're never coming back. It's…it's a lot to take in."
James leaned his head down onto my shoulder, turning so that his lips brushed against my exposed neck. "You know what I remember?"
I leaned into him, and shook my head, forgetting, or possibly not being able to access words for the time being. He felt my head's movement and continued.
"I remember the friendships I've made, the things I've learned, and the person who I finally got to love me."
I smiled at that.
"And even though it all started at Hogwarts, I know it's going to stay with me. This world isn't going to disappear from you after we leave Lily. You will still have your magic, your friends, and a place to stay here, where you belong. And you know what else you'll always have?"
"What James?"
He turned me around then and pulled my face up to his.
"Me."
With that statement, he claimed a few quick kisses before I impulsively pulled away to check the watch on my wrist. It wouldn't do for me to be late for the last Hogwarts Express ride I would ever get to experience.
I sighed, realizing that the time was moving steadily closer to our departure time and to my departure from the school. But James was right. As long as I held onto the things I had acquired here, I never really would feel alone again.
It took us about an hour to make it to the platform at Hogsmead. James and I had stopped at various places in the castle and on the grounds before taking one last look at Hogwarts and moving along the path to Hogsmead, trunks levitated in the air in front of us. I could feel tears prickling my eyes as I moved farther away from the castle, but I mentally told myself to hold them back until we reached the train and I could make an escape to the loo. James was good with many things; crying girls wasn't one of them.
As we approached the station, I took in my last look, at least for a while. I waved to Hagrid who was ushering first years onto the train, to McGonagall, who seeing off the group as the Head Boy and Girl were a bit too busy leaving, and to a few students who I knew I wouldn't get a chance to see again before they departed the platform in London.
I handed my trunk over to James who was loading his at the time. We would meet the rest of the Marauders in their compartment in the back of the train as soon as we could and James seemed to be on automatic pilot to reach them as fast as possible and spend their last few hours of Hogwarts together. I had asked if he wanted me to sit with a few friends to give them some "guy time" but he had refused, saying that this would be the only time that we could ride the Hogwarts Express as a couple, and he wanted to enjoy it.
He had pointedly winked at me after this statement, and as we had been doing last minute revising for N.E.W.T.S. at the time, he was smacked on the head by a year's worth of Transfiguration notes. He had just laughed and promised not to bring it up again, but I had gone on to allude that I wouldn't really mind if we took advantage of one of the empty carriages.
The other Marauders put a quick stop to that suggestion. They had decided that they would spend the ride home discussing their best pranks, playing Exploding Snap, and eating all of the food on the trolley. None of those things particularly bothered me, and it would be interesting to hear just how the four pulled off their pranks, so I decided that it would be a wonderful way to spend my last ride on the Express. Besides, it had James, his hilarious and kind, for the most part, friends, and food. Where else would I want to go?
When James and I located the compartment, a game of Snap had already broken out. I laughed as James complained to them about "not being able to wait five seconds for anything you tosspots!"
The ride passed quickly, even more so than other years. It might have been the nerves that had hit me as soon as we had pulled out of the Hogsmead station, but I decided that it was because of the family that I had now become a part of. James, Sirius, Remus, and Peter were some of the closets boys that I knew, more that brothers in a way. The fact that I was accepted here made me recall James' words yet again about how they would become my family in the Wizarding world. And in that moment, I believed him more than ever.
