Chapter Two- Talking

Harry awoke to sunlight streaming through the window. He thought about how misleading sunshine could be, when all he felt inside was pain. He looked over, happy to see Ginny still sleeping. He didn't want to wake her, he just wanted to watch her sleep. He was amazed at how beautiful she still looked, even with gashes and bruises along her face. Looking at her flaming red hair spread around her, Harry realized something. Harry realized he loved her. He realized that this was the moment he had been waiting for. Yes, he had wanted to defeat Voldemort, but this was something different. He had been waiting for almost a year to just see her again. He had missed her more than words could describe, and he had been terrified that something would happen to her when he was gone. He felt incredibly guilty as he studied the bruises that covered her skin, the cuts and scars that had yet to be healed. He never wanted to leave her side again, never wanted to have to wonder what was happening to her. For all he cared, they could lay there for an eternity, just the two of them. Harry leaned over and kissed her forehead, causing Ginny to stir in her sleep. Ginny groggily blinked her eyes and looked over at Harry. She smiled for the first time in months, and Harry's heart soared. He kissed her again, this time on the lips, and together they sat up.

Harry wanted to talk, but he didn't know how to start. He felt so incredibly guilty, he wasn't sure if he could find sufficient words. He tried to start to speak but quickly stopped again. Just thinking about the words caused him to tear up again. He looked up to find Ginny's warm eyes studying him. They showed concern, but Harry could see the pain behind them. This did not help him, but made him tear up more. He was now crying freely, stuttering the things he wanted to say. "G-G-Ginny, I'm so sorry. It's all my fault. Fred and Tonks and L-L-Lupin. And you getting hurt. And I'm just so sorry. I never meant for anything to happen I -" But Ginny stopped him. He looked back up at her, and saw her own beautiful eyes swimming with tears. She spoke gently to him, " Harry, shhh. It's okay. It's not your fault, it's over. It's done. Voldemort is gone. No one blames you for anything." Harry nodded, unable to speak. Ginny kissed him again, and wiped his tears with her thumb. When he finally quieted down, she became aware of how filthy they both were. She didn't want to disturb the moment between them, but it would not do for either of them to show up at the funerals like this. Ginny used the same gentle tone, not wanting Harry to get upset. "Harry, I think we should get cleaned up. You know, for the funerals." Harry nodded sadly and kissed her again. Ginny got up and walked back to her old dormitory.

Ginny stepped into the shower, grateful for the hot water. Hot showers always helped her clear her head and calm down. She was absolutely bewildered that Harry thought he was to blame for it all. It tore her heart in two, seeing him so upset. She was determined to be there for him, to be his rock during these difficult hours of saying goodbye that were quickly approaching.

Harry got into his own shower, grateful to be clean after weeks of living on the run. He was so ashamed of himself, breaking down on Ginny like that. He couldn't believe he had put her through that. He was angry at himself, he felt like a complete loser. As he dried off, he told himself that he was done with tears. It was Ginny's turn to grieve, he would not dump any more emotions on her. He would comfort her, and not think anymore about himself.