Disclaimer: I own nothing, except the deliberation of the sequence of words that follow.
I thank all my reviewers. This chapter is dedicated to your patience. You guys are awesome and every time I upload a new chapter I reply to the previous chapter's reviews.
I apologize sincerely for not updating sooner. This story was ready a long time ago even though I did do many rewrites. I just couldn't get over how emotional it was and I stalled publishing it. As many time as I've rewritten it, I can't take away the depths of the scenes, the character's feelings. I decided to publish it regardless. I am not a CB antagonist and I want them happy. Next chapter will definitely polarize this one as far as emotional charge is concerned though all my chapters have emotional moments. and next chapter will be more physical so I will probably change the rating of this fic.
Chapter 5
She had waited and he had come, driving one straight line from bliss to oblivion. In fact, the next few days that followed were absolutely heaven - heart-palpitating, toe-curling, head-swimming heaven - because he still had a hard time even believing that it was real, that all of it was real and right in his lap. Every second of everyday Blair was next to him and if he reached over, he could actually smell her, see her, touch her - elicit moans and shivers from her. She would look at him and smile. They were happy smiles, those ones, 'I'm-glad-you're-here-with-me-right-now' smiles. And then he would smile in reciprocity. If he had been across the room, he would come to her and there would be no space between them for even air to pass.
"I love you."
"I love you too."
It had been their little chant.
They hadn't been fighting either and there hadn't been any suspended tension in the air when it was just the two of them. The forgiveness they had bestowed on each other had been washing it all away and freeing them into each other's hearts once again. They simply loved each other, doing so in the most supremely gratuitous of ways, by heart and most especially by touch. The way she touched him back, it had seemed to make all the hurt disappear in a flick, in a stroke. Was it his forgiveness of her that had been diffusing out of the tips of her fingers and the fullness of her lips? Because he couldn't help but think that her touch had healing powers.
There had been laughter as well and not just smiles and moans - hardcore laughter, because Chuck had never ceased to be inappropriate and Blair had never ceased to love it - laughter on the kitchen counter, laughter on the terrace, laughter in the library when the moon was resplendent with glow. Someone else was resplendent with glow. And the ring of her laughter in his ear, that innocent act, only inflamed his desire for her. Maybe it's the way it always ended in a moaning gasp because Blair would eventually feel him hardening under her after a while. She never wanted to leave his neck and so her laughter was always directly in his ear and his response was always directly against her thighs.
Blair had stars in her eyes when she looked at the man of her dreams. The bubble was in place again and they had kept themselves to it for days on end. Although, it had been imposed with an outing in the country one day. The only outing they had taken willingly, then only because Harold had insisted on them having dinner with him and Roman. Blair would never say no to her father, whatever did he have to lecture her and Chuck about. But it was her father, the answer was always yes. Chuck kind of admired her for it even. So they flew to the chateau in Lyon on a beautiful Thursday. Harold whom was about to say something had to hold his tongue back when Chuck and Blair arrived more in love than any Parisians he'd ever seen and beat him to it. Harold swallowed hard, smiled that perfunctory smile you give the spouse of a classmate upon introduction at a 30 year class reunion. He had been rendered speechless. It took him a while before he spoke on it, post dinner, after he had had time to absorb the fullness of Chuck and Blair being Chuck and Blair in front of him. He was oddly comforted at the prospect of her daughter being in a relationship again because he realized, it did make her happy.
"Oh Charles," he spoke up, the glint of approval in eyes. "You make my daughter very happy. I was so skeptical of the two of you but I am most reassured now."
"Thank you Mr. Waldorf." He was humbled. "I love your daughter. I'm glad she's happy with me."
"Blair is glowing," Roman added.
Blair blushed and Chuck awkwardly removed his hand from her lap.
.
.
"Are you happy?" Blair asked when they walked back into her bedroom after dinner that night.
Chuck was a bit stunned by her question and looked over at her.
"Why you ask?" he queried, leaning in to kiss her full red lips that had been beckoning him all night. "Of course I'm happy. What's going on?"
"Nothing," Blair replied shrugging her shoulders as she gave him a passive look. "I realized I never asked you that. Maybe you're not as completely happy as you would have me think. In relationships, I think it's important to ask. You ask me that all the time."
"Well, that's because I want to ensure that you are always happy," Chuck replied, pulling Blair around the waist closer to him. Standing in the middle of her room, both their sets of eyes gleamed at each other in the soft light. "I can't bear the thought of you being unhappy, which is why I'm so thankful for what happened last week. I'm glad we beat that horse into the ground. I'll never let you go again." he said, kissing her tenderly for reassurance.
"Me too," Blair assuaged. "If possible I've fallen more in love with you since," she said, pulling on his lapels to bring him even closer as she looked deep into his eyes conveying her love and admiration for him.
"Hmm," Chuck sighed then prompted, "so, mon amour, are you happy?"
"Haven't you heard?" Blair replied teasingly, a hint of laughter at the corner of her lip as she pushed his jacket further off his shoulders, "I'm positively glowing and I have you to thank for that."
"Well you are now free to repay me," Chuck joked, raising his eyes suggestively at her as he caught the look she was giving him.
He swerved one hand to the back of her neck, catching the waxy milkiness of her soft curls that tumbled down her back, melodically bouncing and fanning over her shoulders. When she angled her chin to look up at him, Chuck didn't think there was anyone more beautiful than the girl in front of him.
Blair broke out in laughter at the intense suggestive look that was transposed on his face and Chuck profited of her moment of lag to capture her lips, immediately causing her to mewl under his ministrations.
"Your happiness is the most important thing to me," he affirmed seriously after a minute when he pulled away from her.
"Hey, what are you-" he admonished another moment later when she stilled her hands on his belt. "If you don't believe me, I'd be glad to show you right now," he baited, reaching once more for her lips but she quickly turned away from him.
"Oh I'm sure you would," she replied casually though a bit of teasing was laced in her voice. "However...I was wondering for a reason."
When Chuck raised his eyes to question her, he saw the serious look she had already plastered for him.
"Which is?" He demanded, his voice registering a little trepidation at broaching the unknown subject of her concerns.
"You seemed distant tonight," Blair informed him seriously. She grabbed a fistful of his shirt possessively which made Chuck tense a little in surprise. "Is something else on your mind? I don't want to have to compete." She pouted.
Chuck looked at Blair meaningfully, flicking the pout on her lips playfully with a finger, which made Blair soften. He returned his hold on her waist and pulled her even tighter against him.
"Plenty of things on my mind," he answered honestly, still gazing at her."but nothing that could compete with you, my love, I promise."
And if his body was telling the truth, Blair knew she was the number one thing on his mind. Now that their bodies were completely pressed up against each other she had actual evidence of the feminine effect she had on him.
"Hmm," she moaned approvingly. "Well then tell me what it is anyway. I'd like to be the judge of that myself. I don't like us having secrets."
"It's not a secret," Chuck corrected. He stilled her hands that were now returned to his belt and pulled her across the room over to the bed with him. Once has sat them both down, he resumed speaking.
"I've just been thinking," he explained curtly. "That's all."
"Well then tell me," Blair said, shifting impatiently causing Chuck to tense up even more.
"Maybe you already know the topic," He finally confessed, all solemn and hooded with gloom. He sounded like a version of himself right before he pawned her away for his hotel. All brooding and emo.
His face instantly dropped away from her demanding eyes as he hectically searched his surroundings - but not her.
"Your father," she murmured desolately, overcome with sadness for him. She couldn't help the urge she felt to take the pain away. Scooting all the way into his lap, she threw her arms around him tightly.
The comfort of Blair's arms dissipated as soon as she touched him as Chuck felt his heart suddenly constrict at the gesture. It weirdly made him feel even more dejected - how normal her reaction had been to feel sorry for him as soon as his father was mentioned. He felt his body quietly revolt against the act. Despite how much she loved him, he just couldn't take it.
He sheepishly removed her arms from his neck and placed her back on the bed. He didn't - couldn't - look at her pitying eyes, so he looked at the floor of her bedroom instead. Only did he not know it wasn't pity that was any longer in her eyes, it was the hurt of his rejection. Blair blinked back the tears that had profusely welled up.
"I don't really want to talk about it if that's okay with you," He stated softly, almost meaning to apologize. He could feel her eyes glittering on his back but he refused to look up at all.
"Chuck, don't push me away," Blair scolded him firmly. "I want to be there for you."
Her voice stronger than Chuck had anticipated, forcing him to finally look up at her. As soon as she caught his eyes with hers once more, she threw her arms around him again and hugged him. This time Chuck couldn't help but be overcome with the love he felt for her.
"I'm not pushing you away," he assured her, as he eased into her touch, as his guard started to unravel. Her touch really did have healing powers.
"If anything you have helped me deal so much. You have no idea," he said gratefully.
"How could I?" Blair demanded, lit passionately. "You never even talked to me about this before."
"I haven't," Chuck agreed thoughtfully. "but I've been avoiding thinking about those things and distracting myself with you."
"I'm your girlfriend," Blair spat, offended. "I'm not a distraction."
"That's not what I meant Blair," he quickly defended, detecting the disapproval in her tone. "And you are more than my girlfriend. You are the love of my life. But my father..."
His voice hitched before he could continue.
"He intimidates you-"Blair reasoned.
"No. he incenses me." Chuck retorted evenly. "Honestly, I just want to find a way to take him down, get back the company. However Jack and I can't do it alone. We need more than just money. That's the problem."
"...And more than your scheming powers," he added when Blair motioned to say something. "My father is a real estate tycoon who faked his own death, he's not going to easily fall for a scheme. It can't just be any scheme."
"I wasn't going to say that," Blair corrected him, soothingly squeezing his shoulder."I was going to offer that maybe you should talk to him."
Chuck laughed. It was dry and a little sad.
"I would if I didn't think it was futile," he replied. "It's nice of you to suggest things but the real business is not like that."
"Consider the option. I know a thing or two about business too." She reminded him.
"You don't know my father," Chuck countered
"Maybe not," she replied, "but I know you. If he could see you, how far you've come-"
"That's not going to work. Blair, I'm sorry," Chuck interrupted her, knowing it was hopeless to even go there. She caught the hopelessness he hadn't even bothered to hide from his tone.
"What are you going to do?" she wondered sadly, looking up at him sympathetically. "I wish I could help you."
He simply lifted his hands to his face in frustration. Blair's heart curled with a tight feeling of sadness.
"Come here," she coaxed him soothingly, taking him into her arms again. She held him firmly as she rubbed his shoulders and his back, all over. Chuck couldn't help but give into her touch. He was spent from thinking about everything else.
"Just make it go away," He requested huskily into the air.
"I will," she replied, already moving around his neck to kiss him, "for tonight."
She wished she could make it all go away. She wish it was a simple as sex. But it would have to do for now.
Soon her lips were claiming his and Blair went back to removing the rest of his clothes. She then removed her own.
"We will deal with this together," she told him reassuringly as she climbed into position to join him.
"I know," he kissed the palm of her hand, "and I love you for it."
"Promise me that."
"I promise."
.
.
"Good Morning," Simone greeted Blair as she leveled the tray of breakfast in front of her mistress for inspection, a selection of croissant and confitures, granola and yogurt. Blair nodded her head in approval and Simone placed the tray on the table at last. Blair set her tea cup on the table. Then sighing happily, she allowed her senses to take in the freshness of the Waldorf-Rose dining room, which was colorfully decked out in finery.
"Pull the drapes, Simone. It is a good morning indeed," Blair replied as she lifted the newspaper and held it close to her face, admiring the photograph of her that was printed on the side of the article that read THE AMERICAN INVASION.
The picture was one of her looking at fabric samples with the Waldorf Designs textile colorist and merchandiser. She looked very professional and even powerful in the shot if she dare say so herself. Blair couldn't help the swell of pride that rose in her cheeks and overtook her face.
"I guess not every French newspaper hates me," she announced by way of conversation with Simone who was already off to her chore.
"There goes a sigh of relief." she exclaimed, sighing emphatically. "Plus they didn't do half bad with the picture selection. I wonder what got into them this morning."
As she finished the last of her speech, Blair heard the rushed steps of sturdy Italian shoes coming towards the dining room. Her heart eagerly raced in her chest and bumbled with anticipation as the steps advanced closer.
Even though she spent every waking second with Chuck, he still made her heart beat faster whenever he announced his presence. From the first second that she had distinguished the approaching wooden squeaks were masculine steps, They had to be Chuck. She commanded them to be. She had missed him since this morning.
"Somebody's happy," he announced cautiously as he turned into the room, hooking himself to the frame of the door like one of her 1950's silver-screen beaus.
"Yes, happy to see you," she replied, gushing with excitement. "I've missed you. Come have breakfast with me."
"I've missed you too" he replied, kissing her briefly before taking a seat next to her at the table. "But you were smiling way before I came into the room. Who's making my girlfriend happy besides me?" He asked, his tone now playfully serious.
"Correction," she amended and tapped his nose, "the love of your life. Do you want me to butter your toast for you," she asked adoringly as she dragged a plate across the table.
She was quite chipper, he remarked as she leaned in to steal another kiss from him.
"You don't have to," he replied, looking at her like a puppy in love, which he was.
"I want to." She insisted, never even wavering her smile a second. "Simone, go get Mr. Bass his espresso, Merci."
"A French newspaper finally printed something good about me," She announced merrily as the door closed once on the maid taking her leave.
Oh that's what it was. It all made sense to Chuck now.
"Oh my!" he exclaimed catching a glimpse of the newspaper in her hand.
"I know," she explained, her surprise just as evident as his had been. "They had sent me a few emails," she started to elaborate, "I responded, of course. However, I had no faith they wouldn't misconstrue my responses and they didn't."
"You may not have Monte Carlo in the palm of your hands," Chuck congratulated her, " but you certainly have Paris."
"I can't agree more," Blair raved with a proud air that had Chuck spreading his own grin.
"Should we celebrate with champagne?" He asked. `
"Well that depends," she replied. "How did your thing with Jack go?" She queried, perking up for his response.
"Very well," he responded curtly
"Very well and..." she prompted.
"What do you want to know?"
"Everything, of course," she said handing him his buttered toast.
"Seems like we're going to Shanghai," Chuck said biting into the slice, "this might be the last leg on the tour before we go in for the kill."
"But I thought you had enough money already," Blair pointed out, digging into her own fruit.
"You can never have enough money, Blair" Chuck corrected shooting her a disapproving glance. "I thought you knew that. But this one is not about money," he clarified.
Blair gave him a hand signal to continue.
"The guy we're meeting there, He's a Chinese real estate developer. He's like the Bart Bass of the East. Their firm and my father have been in competition for decades. He's known my father longer than I've been born, when they were just starting out. He knows my father's main contacts, how my father operates and joining forces with him we can possibly blackball Bart in this whole side of the world and torpedo most of his already ongoing business there if we act smartly. The guy is very well respected. There's clearly something in it for him too since he couldn't do it alone without the new intel we have. My father took many projects off his hands in the past. He has more than enough money to subsidize our agenda. I thought we would have had to start small but Jack got in contact with him this morning-"
"The Bart Bass of the East?" Blair frowned, interrupting his explanation and taking a moment to process the information.
"Trust me Blair, this guy is the real deal."
"Well can I come with?" Blair asked hopefully even though she was unable to mask her disappointment.
"No. Oh no, you shouldn't," Chuck objected, subtly taking offense at her tone.
"Your mother needs you here," he excused. "Waldorf Designs is getting so much buzz now because of you. You have to seize this moment for the company."
"I just want to be there to support you," She assured him dutifully though did little to convince him of it.
"I know," he retorted lamely, " but I don't feel comfortable taking you away from your work. I've done enough of that last week. Plus this is a bit more serious than my normal ventures,"
He tried placating her with a playful look but she simply frown, shooting him her disapproval through her dagger eyes.
"I insist." She whined fitfully, picking up her tea for a long sip which she dramatically gulped down her throat.
"It's just not a good idea Blair," Chuck said a little bit of irritation edging his voice.
"Chuck, what's going on?" Blair demanded. "Do you not want me there?'
"What do you mean? I never said that," Chuck defended, knowing there was probably more truth to her supposition than he would like to admit.
"Shouldn't you be jumping on rainbows that I even offered to come with you, especially for something so important? I'm offering to sacrifice my work for you, why can't you just appreciate that?"
"I never said I didn't but maybe I want to do this on my own," he retorted sharply.
He swallowed hard, his mind already spinning with all the things he could - should - accuse her of. He may have been irrationally provoked but it was true. He needed to do this for himself. Blair had been the one he did everything for which is why he ended up with nothing. She simply had no place to accuse him of anything.
"I believe in you, okay," she assured him, her featured humbled and pleading. "but maybe you shouldn't be going half way across the world to plot against your father." She gave an intent look.
"Don't you think you have a better chance at being let back into the company if you approach him like a businessman? You're so much better than resorting to that and your father must see it the way I see it in you. You deserve to get back what is rightfully yours but you don't have to play dirty like your father. I would invest everything in you to build something on your own. Playing dirty never worked for you in the past. The scandal this is going to cause, your family name, all the reputations involved. If you go there with him, nothing will go back," Blair choked a little bit at the words.
"Oh so this is about you and your pristine reputation isn't it?" Chuck asked.
"Chuck how could you say that? I'm only looking out for you."
"I'll be fine. I know what I'm doing," he insisted.
"There are just places you can't come back from and I know how much it hurts when you lose someone forever,"
They've both been there, through the times when Chuck could never fathom that he and Blair would find their way back to each other. He had only hoped and thank God!
But this wasn'tabout love.
"This is not about me and my father," he said, the words ringing just as hollow as the message they held. "This is about the company."
"Plus, why is this so important to you?" he asked, catching a glimpse of the pain that was shining in her eyes.
"Because I love you and I want the best for you," she replied.
"If you believe that then be on my side. Fight with me," he demanded
"For a worthy cause, but not this," Blair responded, shaking her head awfully.
"The best thing for you is not necessarily what you think you want," she added warningly, "I wanted everything to work out for the best. I never wanted it to come to this," she lamented resignedly.
"Everything is going to work out for the best." He tried to assure her but Blair shook her head away disbelievingly.
"Plus this means you're going away," she reminded him. "What about the fact that I won't survive a day without you. I hate you." she spat, her eyes like daggers of an imperial bitch.
It all made sense now again. But that couldn't possibly be the sole reason she was upset. Something was a-brewing. God, what was he going to do with her?
"You don't. I promise I will call you," he offered lovingly, lifting his chair to move it as close to her own as possible. When he was settle close enough, he scooted all the way in to wrap his arms around her. Her body remained stiff and stubborn and she did not ease into his embrace as he'd hoped. He tried to make her smile but nothing made her smile not even when he tried to feed her some more fruit. He then removed his hands from her shoulders and returned to his own food.
He sat there next to her in the big dining room and they ate the breakfast in silence, the tears gradually building in their sockets, but neither ever daring to look at the other. Chuck watched Blair from the corner of his eye the whole time she was eating but he couldn't decipher what she was thinking. She had a frown momentarily and to think he put it there. For the first time since they'd reunited had he seen her like this. She was her own brand of stubborn but to know he was the cause of her sagging expression, his heart felt heavy, his appetite fell. Chuck abruptly excused himself from the table.
.
.
.
He hadn't particularly wanted to leave her that night, especially in the mist of their cold war which he didn't know how to bait her out of. He had not wanted to step through those doors when the time had come, however Chuck knew he had to do it even though she hated him for it. He had to do it, for no one else but Chuck Bass, even if indirectly for her too - because everything he did, it was always her of course. How could she not know this?
He would miss her so much, not just physically though, but the whole of her. He hoped that she knew this as he looked at her sleeping form soundly snug against the pillow. She was fast asleep below him, like the goddess that she was, a peaceful smile radiating on her face. He wondered if she was dreaming about him. Maybe she wasn't that upset with him after all. He never wanted to wake her. She was such an angel when she slept. He never wanted to leave.
He would miss her laughter, especially, and the knuckles of her toes rubbing on his calves when they cuddled on the chair. Chuck bowed his head in sadness as he dressed himself in the mirror of her dimly lit room. he could hardly stand to be feet away from her, miles apart would only exasperate him. He couldn't fathom it, which is why he also had to keep reminding himself that his father was a monster and that he had to do this when the very thing he loved was screaming against it.
But how?
He packed his suitcase and placed it by the door, staring at it studiously from his position on the bed. It was three o'clock in the morning, a jet had been called for and Jack was coming to get him. Within a few moments he was going to have to step through those doors and leave their bubble behind. The bubble where life with her was all he breathed and dreamed of and all his woes were kept at a forgettable distance.
It was the reality of the situation that was killing him, the odds, the adversity. Once he left the comfort of her bed, he couldn't just run back. He realized he would have to face that beast he wasn't quite sure how to face.
He was however painfully certain that he did not want to be Mr. Blair Waldorf for the rest of his life, which was a great deal why he was doing all this. He loved her beyond words and looking over at her once more, his heart bled anew with joy for her to have had that spot in the newspaper. He solemnly thought back to when it was him who used to have his own newspaper articles in the business section. A single tear rolled down his cheek as it struck him that he no longer had anything of his own but the promise of her heart, for which he had suffered a lifetime of pain. And she already had her future set because hehad sacrificed his own for it.
As much as he loved Blair, the thought of her being the only thing in his life pained him. He couldn't have her come with him to Shanghai and he couldn't tell her all of that. He couldn't let her know either that he was just as scared as she was of what it meant to face his father. He hated the pity that came at the mention of Bart's name. How can one person inspire so much terror? It made him sound invincible and Chuck hated to think that. He also hated the doubt which engulfed him with an even more intense passion to prove them all wrong, himself included.
It was the last leg. He decide it could mean signing his name in blood. It could mean making a deal with the devil but he had to find a way to make Bart see. Over his dead body would he beg his father to take him back like the weakling he was accused of being.
A flash of his father's cold face appeared to him in the moment and Chuck violently shook it out of his head. It truly was like a living nightmare that he desperately wanted to wake up from. He would fight hard to open his eyes and push it out of his mind but waking hours were just as cruel. Chuck didn't like thinking about the whole Bass Industries thing on his own. The reality of what had happened with Bart had shaken and devastated him to his core. The fact that his father had done that to him, the fact that he could be taken for a ride so easily, first with Blair, but all that was fixing itself now...or was it? But then his father, whom he practically brought back from the dead, only to be repaid like a dog.
Sometimes, when completely alone, Chuck just wanted to cry about it, except the tears wouldn't come. The whole thing had infuriated him more than it had caused him grief. Effectively, he was numb from it now. However, the truth of the matter was so ugly that he simply wanted to cry - chemically release his fury if it were possible. It was impossible. That kind of pain couldn't run liquid. It had to be consumed by a fire, a Carthaginian fire.
He had been so unloved all those years as he used to believe. He hadn't been wrong this whole time he had desperately hoped to be wrong about his father. Why had all these people made him believe that Bart ever loved him? Why was it so easy for people to leave and lie and hurt him? Bart never loved him and will never love him or accept him regardless of personal sacrifices Chuck made for him. Bart was a cold unfeeling person and there was no redemption for that kind of soul.
Chuck cried a single roll of tear, not for the hurt but for the longing. All those years he wasted longing for something that would never come. He was done longing now. He was going to get back what was rightfully his.
He was desperate.
"Blair, I'm leaving," he whispered as he shook her a little as she yawned, stretching her arms fluidly over her head only to turn on her side and fall right back into her restful state.
"Blair." He kissed her gently. "I have to leave. Don't be mad, okay," he begged.
"Hmmm," she moaned appreciation of the gentle caress of his lips, "Chuck, why is your face wet?"
He hadn't even realized he was crying.
"It's nothing," he quickly objected, wiping at the evidence.
"Okay then." She patted the space next to her, kinder than Chuck had expected of her."Get back into bed," she nagged, her eyes still closed.
"Blair," Chuck chuckled nervously, not knowing how to take her mood even though Blair seemed to be dreamily floating somewhere else, "I can't get back into bed."
"Blair?"
"Yes," she replied tiredly in her sleep.
Had she forgiven him or was she simply just deeply unconscious?
"Okay. You're sleeping," he conceded, smiling at the adorable expression on her face, his glassy eyes glittering with feeling of completeness he only knew with her. "I'm sorry but I'll be going now."
"Will you take me with you?" she mumbled incoherently.
Oh how angelic she was when she slept.
"I would," he explained sadly, "I want to but, you see, I don't think you understand it, Love. I don't blame you." His tears were brimming to the surface once more. "I just can't do it Blair. I can't let my father get away with this."
"Chuck, what is it?" Blair made a whining sound and turned over in her sleep.
"Nothing, beautiful," he replied indulgently.
"No. you're very handsome. That's what you are," she blurted and Chuck was suddenly laughing before he could catch himself.
She made a deep grunt low in her throat in protest to the noise and Chuck chuckled anew at her little quirk. Suddenly his heart was lighter. As she was coming back to life from her slumber, she was inspiring life back into him again.
"I know. I know," he teased with a pout, "I'm going to miss you too. But I'll text you when I get there, my love."
"I love you," he said when she didn't respond, seemingly knocked out once more. "Even if you hate me," he rehashed sadly.
Swiping his thumb over her forehead, he leaned in for a soft kiss. She surprised him by instantaneously capturing his lips deeper with hers, moaning indecorously in her half sleep state. He kissed her back full force, momentarily forgetting his woes, the moisture on his face dabbing her own.
"Chuck, are you crying?" she asked, her voice soft yet a little heavy with sleep.
"No," he lied, removing his face from her embrace. He stood up to walk away but she opened her mouth to speak.
"I don't want you crying okay. I want you to be happy."
"I am. I am. I'm not crying." he assured her, staring at her closed lids. "You make me the happiest I could ever be."
"Good," she replied in delight at his confession.
"Go back to sleep baby. I love you."
"Me too," she said before he stepped away from the bed like a soldier on a mission.
.
.
Blair could feel the sunlight beaming on her face even before she opened her eyes. She kicked her legs up and stretched her arms over her head, a beautiful sense of peace and happiness about spending the day with Chuck raining over her. She reached her arms out across the bed to seek him - Chuck! - He was not there. Panic claimed her one second but quickly Blair reeled her mind and decided to breathe instead.
"Chuck," she called out as she looked around the room to find no signs of his presence, not even a castaway sock or a cravat hanging crookedly on the back of a chair. The only sign of him she could distinguish was the faint smell of his cologne lingering on the sheets. She closed her eyes to take in the sensory treat. She then got out of bed to look all over the house but there was no Chuck. Not even in the library where she thought he'd be waiting for her with breakfast. She grinned hopefully as she turned the knob but stepping inside, there was nothing but piles of books and periodicals which they had left in disarray; last they paid a visit in their lust crazed state. He was not in her mother's library. She sighed longingly - their little sacred room. (She had vaguely turned it into her private study ever since she started doing extensive research on fashion during her recently self-imposed week of sabbatical with Chuck).
Checking the big mahogany clock which hung over the arch entrance, Blair was also a little bit taken aback at how late in the morning it was. It was very unlike Chuck not to have woken her earlier for all the research he knew she needed to get through in the day as well as to spare him quality time. Even if she had started a cold war between them, the gentlemanly thing she had expected of him was to still wait on her mercy and grovel for her forgiveness because she was rightof course. She frowned a bit at the thought. She had wanted to make last night up to him regardless, regretting that the slept in discord. She had been willing to make the first move. She sighed in frustration. She really was in the mood for that quality time now that she thought about it. Where in the universe was her enormously stubborn pain in the ass?
With the tour of the penthouse completed and no Chuck Bass to play with, Blair returned to her bedroom a little bit sadder than she left.
"Simone," she called lazily as she settled once again into bed. Her hand restless for the attention of one depraved, well dressed, twenty one year old billionaire. At least he was one she mused as she smoothed her silky nightgown over her crossed knees.
"Yes, mademoiselle," the blond girl rushed in less than a minute later, stepping into the room curiously to take Blair's request.
"Bring me breakfast," Blair asked quietly. Not bothering to even look up from her lap. Her voice rang like an order. There was no playfulness or joy to amuse her eager maid and Simone withdrew her impertinent smile immediately.
"What would you like, mademoiselle?" she asked politely, falling into her trained demeanor.
"What did Chuck have this morning for breakfast?" Blair asked the maid.
Now, it was Simone's turn to avert her gaze to her lap. Blair's moods were already a little bit more sour than usual, as it was, the maid feared what kind of monster would explode out of the feisty little brunette once she were to relay the truth.
"Mr. Chuck didn't have anything this morning for breakfast," Simone replied quietly, "I was told he left in the middle of the night."
Blair didn't gasp or look horrified.
She suddenly looked up at the girl, almost kindly for her honesty, to Simone's surprise. Her face was inscrutable, even softer than usual and the maid was a little bit apprehended by that kind of reaction. Rather than angering Blair, the news had seemed to pacify her. Neither of them spoke up for a minute as the air thickened between them. Blair twirled the pliable fabric around her fingers distractedly.
"Mademoiselle," Simone spoke up uncomfortably.
"Je vous en prie, Blair hissed softly to dismiss her, her eyes cold and harsh though he lips hinted at a smile, however, it was more of a sorry kind of smile. Simone readily obeyed and shut the door behind her
.
.
He left in the middle of the night? Blair was beyond furious. She knew exactly where he must have gone. Couldn't he have even waited until daybreak to talk it out with her? It hadn't even been a full 24 hours since she had rejected his intentions, which she only believed to be in his best interest. She was more than angry with him. NOW.
However, she realized she was quickly even sadder - raising her eyes from her lap to look around her pitiful room, his side of the bed all cold and lifeless. Her fingers ached to tangle in his soft curls and trace the column of his throat. Her eyes longed to drink in his beautiful body through which she imbibed his soul. Did he not understand what he had done?
The last week with Chuck had been so heavenly good that Blair's insides tingled with elation at the recollection. She was in love like she'd never been in love before. Call her one of those silly girls in the perfume commercials, Blair absolutely did not care. She now knew what it meant to lose the one person who made sense of life for her and she wanted to pour all of her into him so he could stay, so she could always have him. She smiled at the thought, but where was he? She didn't have him now.
Pulling her phone from her bedside she lingered a little staring at the screen. Maybe she was overreacting, like she had overreacted the day before...which had led to this. Maybe he had called. After all, she did have one new voicemail.
She pressed the button to play the message.
HelloDarling. RomanandIwerethinking-
Ugh. In all of her life, Blair had never been so disappointed to hear her father's voice.
So, he hadn't called, not even to apologize. Perhaps if he had called - but no, what difference would that make? He still had left in the middle of the night without so much as a goodbye, but even that wasn't the problem anymore. Nothing she had said to him had meant anything. It wasn't the fact that he had left, everything had to do with why he had left – to avoid her. Yes, she had been the one who started it at breakfast and ignored him the rest of the day, (except, she felt bad and had woken up with the intention of making it up to him…buthe was already gone). Two was playing the game now, the feeling unsettled Blair. She released a puff of air she had no idea she'd been holding. She was exasperated, considering she fumed the rest of the day. She had refused Simone and sent her away with the lunch tray.
"I'm mad at the world, don't you understand."
.
By the time he finally called, Blair was ready to explode. They argued. Of course she brought up the fact that he left in the middle of the night automatically in defense of her actions, which he found completely irrational since she had been the one to put the cold shoulder between them at breakfast. What was he supposed to do, stay and argue? Regardless, they were arguing now.
"You clearly object to taking down my father now. You refused to speak to me, which was strange considering you're supposed to be on my side. Don't you think all of that was affecting me too?" he all but yelled at her.
"You want to take down your father, you're so happy about it. I just didn't want you to lose one more person who loves you."
Onemorepersonwholoveshim
To Chuck, that didn't even make sense. When did his father love him? He had just made peace with the fact that his father had NEVER loved him. And she had even soothed his tears about it that morning, unknowingly. Did she mean to upset him?
So what if he gave him blood? He might as well have been a stranger.
"My father doesn't care about me Blair. that's what you always do. You pity me. You think you can save. You think i need you or anyone to save me?"
He hated the pity. He hated it. And why did she even care so much?
Blair suddenly burst into tears.
Her sobs were anguished earsplitting noises that made Chuck's heart stop beating.
"Blair-"
She was hurting.whathadhedone?
"This isn't about your father, Chuck" she barked at him accusingly.
whathadhedone?
"No, because this is about you," he spat a little more acridly than he should have.
But he was angry. He behavior was completely irrational.
"How could you?" she bawled even nastier this time. If she could scratch his eyes out, she would have.
"You have no idea what I've been going through since that day. How dare you?"
"You wanna fix my mess so you don't have to deal with your. It's not my fault. It's yours." He was unapologetic at this point.
And her face was one with the pillow, which she soaked.
Serena. It was the one word he didn't say but Blair almost felt like he thought it. The admission was so painful, she hated that he wasn't wrong.
It truly wasn't about Bart anymore, it was about her and maybe it had been this whole time.
Serena. Blair was still holding the phone. She flipped it in her hand not to throw it across the room. Chuck had already hung up. She had the urge to scream.
Alone in her room with a daylight nightmare of a life, Blair scrolled through her contacts. She wanted to call someone. Maybe Nate, but they hadn't spoken like that in so long. How could she just call him with her problems? He must be sleeping or something anyway. It was late evening states side. She sighed regretfully at the thought.
For the first time since she had kicked the girl out of home, Blair decided to pause her thoughts on it sincerely. There it was, Serena's number and that picture (she had forgotten ever taking that picture) - that picture which drained all the color from her face - which she didn't even know how to process because the sheer cruelty of it appearing in her loneliest moment of grief.
It was a low quality picture when she had been wearing a velvet robe, her hair tied back in an unforgiving state of neglect, a rosary around her neck. Her eyes were rimmed from crying and her lips flat and washed white. Yet Serena was hugging her tight and admiring her, such awe-filled eyes that Blair couldn't help the stab of guilt she felt overcome with.
She remembered how Serena had enveloped her and proclaimed with all the vibrancy in her "I love you Blair. I'm the luckiest best friend in the world."
And right then and there, that forlorn night, Blair had made a mental note to throw Serena the best twenty-first birthday party ever.
Oh, Serena's birthday, she snapped out of her trance. It was coming up. June was ending.
Blair wanted to cry - cry because things were impossible. She had always envisioned being the one to throw Serena a twenty-first birthday party. It was such a monumental coming of age that they'd dreamed up together since the age of four. Blair had spent hers in the confines of white walls and beeping sounds. She had wanted Serena to have a happy one. Serena was always sunshine and sparkle and she deserved exactly that.
The memory of her own twenty first - how easily sadness can plunge to unknown depths. She was stilled like a wax figure looking at the picture on her phone. Those memories they had made when she could never have imagined not having Serena as her best friend, even just nine months ago. She remembered bluntly that particularly gloomy day in November, in the frigid cold of her assigned room, when her future had held no promise but that of a loveless marriage - yet she had planned to be happy for Serena's birthday because Serena had made hers so special even though encumbered by circumstances. Now she could only be distraught over it realizing how tragically her well-meant intentions had been met with impossibility.
It was now seven days before Serena's birthday, she was reminded, and at that, the tears came swiftly. The day was stripped of all the hopefulness it had several hours prior when she had woken up with the elegance and leanness of a dancer with only thoughts of Chuck on her mind. Oh Chuck! He drained the color out of her face too.
The emptiness overwhelmed her. There was nothing in the world that was right anymore. Blair sat up and caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror across the room. She had to quickly look away from the shame she saw reflected there, remembering how on her twenty first birthday Serena had spent the whole day with her at the hospital. She hadn't even gone home to shower. She had said she would not leave her best friend until Blair could smile again .And Blair hadn't been able to smile because Chuck hadn't been able to breathe on his own yet. Serena had stayed the whole time and sung her happy birthday twenty one times. Blair never smiled but Serena had been satisfied.
Blair cried and cried alone in her bed. Chuck hadn't called again even though many hours had passed by the time she checked her phone again. She realized she wanted him to though she hated him for telling the truth.
.
.
It was Twenty-four hours later when Chuck heard the swoosh sound of a box being thrown into the trash bin.
"What is wrong with you?" he hissed at her, "I love you. I stood half an hour in line waiting for those macaroons."
"Chuck leave," Blair screeched on the other side of the door.
"No, "Chuck shot back defiantly, avoiding the frightful gaze of the maid who had just walked into the room unsuspectingly, carrying a hamper of freshly laundered clothes. He did not want to see yet another set of pitiful eyes, but Simone quickly took her unceremonious leave, sparing him the inconvenience.
"Do you know how long I had to spend on a plane just to get here?"
"Go away," Blair insisted
"No. I won't go away," He shouted at her, "until I know why the love of my life is hiding from me." Blair released an audible sigh and Chuck heard it through the door but she did not relinquish her stubbornness. He knew he was in for a long night given how their last conversation had ended, but what he didn't know was that he had managed to force a tight strained smile on her face with his term of endearment.
"Blair I'll break that door down if you don't open it," Chuck warned her, tensing his voice with a bit of command.
"What do you want me to say," he implored when no reply reached him. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. I can't take anything back. All I care about is you. Blair, I can't imagine not having-"
"Shut up." He was rudely interrupted mid sentence by a soft husky voice.
Turning his face to look over, his eyes caught hers immediately. Strangely he had been so intensely meditating his apology that he missed the squeaky twist of the knob when the door flung open. He looked at her sharply, her face a mask of hurt, eyes sunk in. It broke Chuck's heart. In a flash, he stalked his way into the room and squeezed her into a hug.
"Blair I'm sorry." He apologized again. "What are you doing locking yourself in the bathroom? You don't think I would come in?"
"You're only in because I let you," she pointed out, "I wanted you here," she added a little sheepishly, smacking his shoulder as she did so.
"But you told me to leave," he complained, hugging her even tighter in relief.
"Yes," she confessed, finally letting her body melt against the warm comfort of his arms (which she had missed), "because I wanted you to push a little more with your apology, which you did."
Chuck smile against her hair at her open confession. It was such a Blair Waldorf thing to do. He then pulled a little bit away from her to look at her face.
"Blair, are you crying?" he asked, realizing that tears were streaming down her face.
She sniffed dramatically, steeling herself, almost turning away from him but he held her tight into place.
"Blair," he pleaded.
"No. I'm not crying," she lied, even though the tears were trickling down. Chuck reached out a hand to wipe her cheek with the flat of his palm. He could also feel his heart grinding against his chest as he looked at her tenderly to find that her eyes had none of their usual glint. All he could read was a sad and somber expression.
"Please don't cry," he implored pathetically. "There shouldn't be anything to cry about,"
Blair rolled her eyes a bit peeved by his scrutiny. "I said I'm not crying," she defended.
"I'm really sorry, Blair," He apologize again pulling her in close, "For leaving...for everything."
"I've forgiven you lots of worst things," she contested simply.
"You have," he agreed. She had forgiven him lots of worse things before.
"What is going on?" he demanded a moment later when he loosened her from his embrace. "Forty eight hours ago I left you all soundly sleeping and now you're crying your face off. I know what I said yesterday was harsh. I'm sorry," he apologized for the hundredth time since he had arrived in front of her bathroom. "I would have called again to apologize but I knew you wouldn't have picked up, so I came back in person for you. Surprise!" he exclaimed charmingly.
She almost smiled.
"Thank you," She confessed gripping his shirt tightly as if she was about to shake him or make love to him. "I needed you so much. I was so upset with you yesterday however I realized that was more due to other reasons that had nothing to do with you. I was pushing you not to let go of your father because I realize I was holding on to a really big loss." She purged all in one breath.
Chuck looked at her tentatively before he spoke. He could feel her warming against him.
"I figured." he stated, brushing another path of tears from her eyes. " I didn't take any of it personally either. I know you're going through a lot right now. If I have to be your emotional punching bag, then so be it," he added comfortingly.
"Oh don't say that," she swatted him playfully in reprimand. "I would never want to abuse you like that. I may go overboard sometimes too but I love you way more than any hurtful thing I could ever say to you."
"I love you too," he affirmed like a promise. He leaned in to kiss her hair, meaningfully closing his eyes to savor the feel of the moment. He didn't seem to be able to get enough of her. It was almost like a frantic subconscious not just need, but dependence on the love that he felt for her.
"So are you going to tell me what's going on?" he inquired breaking the silence that had settled upon their sacred moment.
"I would" she replied timidly, releasing a huff at once, "but I don't think I'm ready. I had an emotional day yesterday."
"I don't mean to pry but is it about the baby?" Chuck asked sheepishly, seeing Blair's torment to disclose what was really on her mind.
Blair gave him a wary look. Her jaw was tight and she swallowed. He caught the grief she tried to veil by closing her eyes.
"Sorry I didn't mean to go there," he amended quickly, feeling foolish for being so presumptuous with his word choices. "I'm sorry. I've just been wriggling my mind. The way you broke down in tears over the phone. I didn't know what I had triggered. I didn't know...It seemed pretty personal."
Blair shook her head against his chest without response. He didn't know if he should hug her as he didn't want to pity her. He remembered how it felt when she had done that to him. That's what he had always thought although now he was finding out that pity and sympathy weren't quite the same thing.
"How did the baby get into this?" she asked tepidly.
"I know I'm perpetually putting my foot in my mouth, but yesterday on the phone you said i had no idea what you been going through since that day," Chuck explained desperately, "You were really upset about it."
"Yes," she acquiesced calmly breaking away from his hold to gain her own space. Walking to the end of the bathroom she leaned against the wall a moment before slipping down to the floor and hugging her knees as if she were consoling herself. Chuck watched her with a morbid ache all over his face. He couldn't hide the way every once of pain he could conceive from her reacted inside his body just as brutally. His heart flooded with the wretched feeling. He reached her on the floor, sitting just a few feet away.
"I was really hurt," she continued after a moment, " but why would you think..."
"I don't know," he admitted, "Everything you said. The way you were acting. I assumed it must have been around the time you found out you were pregnant. Maybe you were dealing with that. I didn't know what to do or think. I was going crazy."
Blair had never heard such deeply caring words pronounced to her. Her heart suddenly overwhelmed with a maddening kind of love for him she hadn't even known she was capable of.
"Chuck, this isn't about the baby," She spoke up to reassure him, "I do have moments when I'm incredibly sad over it but yesterday wasn't one of those days."
"Sadly for me," she spoke up again mournfully, "I have more than one loss to grieve."
"I know. Was it-"
"Your sister and I aren't friends anymore." Blair confessed languidly, removing her head from his chest to sit upright against the wall. This time when the tears trickled, she didn't try to wipe them and she didn't try to avert her eyes either, allowing Chuck to peer all the way into the bottomless depths of her orbs.
"Yesterday after our fight, I couldn't escape thinking about her. I don't know, for some reason it really hurt me." She continued to lament.
"You miss her," Chuck explained soundly, reaching his hand over to rub soothingly up and down her thigh, which was bare to him since she she had only been wearing his favorite dress shirt that he had left in the drawer in case she missed him.
She did miss him, now she was crying.
As the sobs intensified, Chuck moved over and cocooned her in his arms securely like he had done countless time before. But this was his Blair and he couldn't help but hurt to see her like that. She cried hard against shoulder but he didn't care.
"And I'm sorry I brought up the baby," he admitted sorrowfully. "I hate to provoke you like that. You have enough to deal with."
"It's okay," Blair assured him, her tone clipped with the thickness of her sobs. "It's not your fault. You were just being the amazingly caring boyfriend that you are."
She manage to strain her face into a thankful smile. Chuck immediately felt warm at the gesture and smiled back at her
"Look how far into your mind you went just to find out the source of my troubles," She added all starry-eyed as she relaxed against his chest once more. "No one ever does that for me."
"I don't think that's true," Chuck disagreed smoothly though he was flattered. "I think a lot of people would do that for you."
"Regardless of that, you're the one that's here right now," she affirmed, caressing his chest.
"True," he relented, knowing Blair wouldn't allow him to dispute this any further."But do you find they don't inquire because they're afraid they will upset you?"
"I think that's probably the case," Blair admitted a bit chagrined by the confession.
"Well, you can talk to me about it anytime you want," Chuck offered sincerely, smoothing sweeping his fingers over her exposed skin.
"No. I guess they're right not to ask," she sighed. "I don't think I'm ready to talk about it. To anyone,"
"What about Serena," Chuck asked after a moment when he felt her relax again. "Do you want to talk about that?"
"It ended really badly. I regret ever going there with her. I don't think she'll ever forgive me," Blair confessed sadly.
"Is she really the only one who has to forgive the other person? I'm sure both of you did things that you now regret," he said.
"Yes," she acquiesced thoughtfully, placing a hand over his heart as she lazily played with the pocket square in his suit jacket. "But nothing she does will ever be as bad as what I did to her."
"Do you regret dating him?" Chuck asked, the question slipping from his tongue before he even had a chance to contemplate what he was saying. She angled her head to give him a questioning look but she answered anyway.
"Well my motives weren't all that pure so I do regret the fact that I used him to run away from my reality while hurting the people I love most in the process," she admitted contritely yet firmly, "But I don't regret our friendship. We should have just stayed friends."
"I couldn't agree more," Chuck replied, smoothing over her cheek with his thumb. The tears had stopped running and therefore had started to dry.
"But I'm glad you chose to follow your heart at the end of it all," he finished lovingly.
"I couldn't agree more either," She seconded, giving him a small smile.
"Well Jack and I are going to New York next week," Chuck announced a moment later. "Maybe I'll get Serena to agree to talk with you."
Blair raised a suspicious eyebrow.
'What's going on in New York next week?" she asked .
"I'm going to have to face my father one way or another," Chuck explained, given her a look of surrender. "I might as well do it for the benefit of the company,"
"I agree," Blair patted his shoulder encouragingly. " I think you should talk to Bart, even if you decide it's just for the company."
Chuck shook his head at her in agreement, letting her claim his fingers into her own as she had approved of his new declaration. Blair had been right. He was going out of his way to destroy his father just to prove him wrong when the goal should have always been to get back the company.
"It doesn't make you weak or any less of a man the way you think he sees you," Blair informed him, "You were clouded by anger so you thought you had to prove him wrong by standing up against him, trying to defeat him. You don't have to prove him anything."
"Plus you have a way better chance at getting back the company if you work from the inside," she affirmed. "This is the only way you'll have nothing to lose. You can save the money you've won, in case you decide that's not what you want anymore, simply just because you don't have Bass Industries doesn't mean you have nothing," she added pointedly. "I'll still be here to build a future with you."
"But I thought you did want me to defeat my father," Chuck asked, as a flash of him and Blair in Monte Carlo jogged into his memory.
" I would cash out my entire trust fund if that's what you needed," Blair told him seriously, " I would. Defeating your father is a noble goal, just not for the reasons you were doing it."
"Not because you should feel you need to prove that you can defeat him and not because you believe Bass Industries must be your entire future," she lectured him a bit sternly, making sure to hold his eyes intently.
"I feel guilty because I know you think that way, which is why I didn't want you to go to Shanghai in the first place," she confessed.
"Blair-"
"I know you feel like you've given up your future to save mine and that you may never get back your future because of decisions you made for me. You will never have a proper relationship with your father and I'm the cause of all of that," she stated like a fact but her tone was much more apologetic than informative.
"Blair, I told you my father doesn't care about me and I don't care to have a relationship with him either." Chuck made sure to make his tone sound as indifferent as he possibly could and it came with no effort. Maybe he had truly grown indifferent this time.
"Will you truly be happy with just me?" she asked sincerely.
"I have you," Chuck affirmed hopefully, "I have Lily, Nate, Serena, Jack,"
"Monkey," Blair added jokingly.
"Yeah Monkey's probably best out of all you," Chuck retorted tauntingly.
"Well, he'll have to move over," Blair returned smugly, "because I'm claiming the number one spot. You can count on me to be by your side when you face your father and you will win if you have to."
"I can see it already. you have amazing foresight," Chuck retorted playfully. It was nice how even in their most intimate conversations, they always managed to make each other forget a little while, with a laugh or a smile. They tried.
"I love a takedown as much as the next person, but I love you more," Blair replied sweetly, returning a little bit of the seriousness to the conversation. "No need to risk losing Bass Industries over some egotistical need to best your father, cause a scandal by declaring war and ruin your business reputation by dirty schemes. if you possess one thing, it's integrity. Bart just has to let you back into the company but you'll need to have a serious conversation with him. Back at the press conference, he may have just been in a moment simply because he was envious of what you had that he didn't. But now he has lily back in the folds. He should see things differently."
Chuck shook his head passively. He had made up his mind but he didn't want to think about it any longer.
"What about you?" she asked in turn. "What's your foresight into my future?"
"You and my sister reunited as best friends," he announced hopefully. "I did it once, I hope I can pull it off again,"
"Have you spoken to her lately at all?" Blair asked.
"No. I haven't. She hasn't called me, weirdly," Chuck said to his own surprise, searching his mind to recall the last conversation he had with Serena, but he couldn't even remember. It was so long ago.
"Maybe she read the newspaper article about us being in Monaco together. Maybe she's avoiding me just to avoid you. But I'll see her in New York I'm sure," he added optimistically.
"She must really hate my guts to avoid you. You're her brother," Blair acknowledged with a resigned tone, laying her head down further into the crook of his shoulder to seek even more of his warm and reassuring presence. His arm came around to squeeze her in place.
"I hate it when you two fight," Chuck proclaimed with a frown, after a moment. "Neither of you is happy. You have to forgive each other. I love you both."
"If it were that easy," Blair sighed. "I would understand if Serena never wanted to speak to me again."
"Well I'll be going to New York shortly." Chuck re-announced hopefully, "I can promise you I'll find out." He rubbed her arm reassuringly.
"Maybe you should buy her something Chanel before you go over there talking peace treaties mentioning my name..." Blair suggested helpfully.
"Maybe I should come with," she proposed a second later lighting up brightly at the idea.
"But you're busy," Chuck countered with a little pout.
"But I love you," she said in retort, leaving no room for rebuttal. Chuck understood perfectly the pointed expression on her face.
"I agree," he amended immediately, "say it again,"
"I love you," she confirmed to the happy sound of him chuckling, "Wherever you are, I want to be there as well. I don't want you leaving my side again so soon after you disappeared."
"I would love if you came." He nodded his head dreamily at the thought. "The two of us together as a couple, New York is not going to know what hit her."
"That's exactly why we have to go together." Blair confirmed excitedly., giving him her prettiest smile, complete with several bats of her eyelashes.
"You have the best foresight of anyone I know, he contemplated as he gently touched his lips to her cheek. "It's like a talent."
"Flatter away," she teased him. "You'll need those points for tonight,".
"Oh I think I earned all my points already," he replied smugly.
"What do you mean?" Blair asked narrowing her eyes at him suspiciously.
"I bought you something," he offered simply, still retaining the smug expression on his face.
"You honestly still think you can win me over with gifts? I thought I told you last week-" Blair said rolling her eyes at him.
"It's from that place you told me they just opened," he confirmed, knowing that would instantly snap her to attention, which it did, to his amusement.
"In Shanghai?" Blair demanded hysterically, unable to contain her curiosity.
"Only the best for the love of my life," Chuck replied as he leaned in to kiss her for a brief moment before Blair was up on her feet like a ballerina, as if completely recovered from her emotional distress at the suggestion of one famous jeweler.
Just her favorite jeweler that is.
"Harry Winston?" she exclaimed jovially as she lifted herself from the bathroom floor. "I think you are exceeding your point limits right now Chuck. Go get me my present," she commanded him.
"Well come with me," he drawled with a twinkle as he extended his arm for her to help him off the floor, loving the way she had suddenly become a little crazed rabbit. It could certainly work in his favor.
"Maybe you should surprise me too," he proposed. "Fair is Fair. I'll close my eyes if you don't want me to peek. But after you change out of my shirt and dress for the night I'll give it to you."
Her eyes sparkled with something that Chuck couldn't even recognize. It was greater than lust. It was like she wanted to consume him in a way that physicality couldn't permit.
" I am so in love with you Charles Bartholomew Bass," Blair said when he was up on his feet, his arm around her waist. She placed the palm of her hand on his back, swiping up and down affectionately.
"I'm going to need to hear you say that again just like that in about 5 more minutes," Chuck teased her catching a renewed glint of happiness when he locked eyes with her once more. It made him smiled. He leaned in and kissed her lips with a blazing hell this time.
Blair was giggling when she walked out of the bathroom. The sound directly filling Chuck's ear. He had missed it like nothing he ever imagined. Just the simple ring of her laughter, signaling her happiness to be in his presence. She was happy again. It kind of made him complete. And the act of being one with her amplified it a hundred fold. It was like getting burned by a sweet fire.
.
.
My author's note. I just want to say that this chapter is clearly a lot P.O.V heavy and that's why it took me some rewrites. Chuck has like 3 different P.O.V.s and Blair has at least four. Throughout the whole writing process, CB's P.O.V toward each other was probably the hardest to write. I wanted them to break each other down a little to get to the core of their problems. And I wanted it to resonate with the fact that they know each other better than they know their selves. Blair saw Chuck's problem and Chuck's saw Blair's torment before either were even willing to admit it. And they built each other up at the end.
AND ASLO (this is an add- on) Well I recognize that Blair and Chuck's POVs are extreme in this chapter and well I intended for them to be irrational because ultimately that's how they were able to make each other see. Just because Chuck says he did everything for Blair, maybe he thinks it in an accusatory way, doesn't mean that's how Chuck truly feels. And it isn't simply about Bass Industries, it's about how he is nothing without her, not so much how he has nothing. But well, his wealth matters. That's what he grew up with. It doesn't represent his vanity, it's his identity. So it completely has to do with what he is or isn't, not what he has or doesn't have, because of her.
And Blair feeling like a monster because of what she did to Serena and trying to absolve it through 'saving' Chuck and his father's relationship doesn't mean that's a really rational behavior either. Obviously both Chuck and Blair were in some kind of crazy state ( and I mean literally crazy state) in this chapter. Maybe that's why it was so hard to convey but the problem of Bart and Serena wasn't gonna go away so they had to talk about it. And instead of coming to each other, I made them pull it out of each other, like 3x04 or 3x12 for example.
Hopefully my inspiration springs in the next chapter. This one was probably the darkest I've written and I am not all that proud of it but I just felt it necessary to go there.
There was a lot of crying. I kind of felt evil for writing all that crying. Maybe i can make it up in the future chapters.
This chapter is the longest I've ever written.
This chapter is largely un-betaed, But I want to thank my beautiful Riml (Ohchuckles) for having read over the 1st half for me.
