They came upon a dirt road on the morning of their fourth day, and after following it for several hours the group came upon a cluster of lights on the horizon that was such a riot of colors and sizes and intensities that they felt instinctively that it was unnatural. Nature's lights so far had been soft gold and silver; the mass of red and purple sparks and bright flares of green and orange spoke of men who, world to world, had never been contented with what their world offered but must strive for higher and stronger and brighter and faster and whatever else they thought of as "greater" and "more".
The lights were bright but far away, and it took some time for the travelers to draw near enough to make out more details. The colorful confusion turned out to be one end of what looked like a market street, gaudy with colorful signs and boxes of wares hardly less bright and glittering than the banners and boards that advertised them. The travelers stood at a careful distance for a while, just observing, trying to gauge how far they would stand out should they approach the town. In many worlds they blended in without any trouble, with perhaps only a minor difference in costume to draw local eyes. In a couple, they had been too alien in body and build and coloration to even be seen at a distance without raising some outcry, and though Mokona's translation ability and their various wits and wiles had so far kept them alive, they'd learned to approach new civilizations with caution when possible.
The citizens looked very much like they did; human and with various hues of hair and eye and skin, gesturing with two arms and walking about on two legs, laughing and shouting and some few bickering over purchases. There were tall and short statures, builds of every variety between scrawny and flabby, and even the clothing differed enough from person to person that the travelers might walk about and only draw down comments about being unfashionable, not objectionable. The citizens showed a good bit more skin than the otherworlders, but that was a difference easily remedied by removing cloaks and jackets or shirts. The only problem was the aforementioned skin.
Men, women and children all glowed like everything else did on this dark yet brilliant world, with glimmering curlicues weaving around bare limbs and circling pale necks before disappearing into gauzy shirts and trim vests. The tattoo-like markings were all a soft golden hue, but everyone wore fabrics and accessories that shone out in more vibrant colors such as blue and purple and green. The women and many of the older girls had red- or peachily-lit fingernails besides, and some - both male and female - wore shining baubles in their hair. After observing for a while, Kurogane spoke first.
"No," he said flatly, as if responding to a question or statement one of the others had made. But he'd caught the little quirk of pale lips from the corner of his eye and known. Fai laughed nearly noiselessly and grinned up at him, unfazed by the glare being sent his way.
"Isn't blending in part of being a ninja?" the blond asked, and even though he kept his voice low, Kurogane could still hear the teasing suffusing every word.
"That is not blending in," he growled. "That is called joining the idiot parade."
"Mmm, I guess you'd still stand out even if you were dressed properly, what with your perpetual dark scowl blotting out the lights." The wizard blithely ignored Kurogane's scathing look and turned to Syaoran, who was still watching the townspeople bustling about. A quick tap on the arm drew the boy's attention and then Fai jerked his head lightly back toward the meadow, silently suggesting that they withdraw a bit and discuss options.
"So, what do you think?" Fai asked, once they were out of a direct line of sight from the marketplace, and Kurogane mentally sighed to himself as he noted the lively interest on his companions' faces.
"Might as well walk up and tell the usual 'we come from far away' story," he said with a shrug, and got general agreement. The overall air of the place had been bustling and happy, and he hadn't seen anything resembling a weapon being carried about. This didn't discount the possibility of magic or some other potentially dangerous ability, of course, but they hadn't gotten so far in their journey by being overcautious. This place just felt peaceful, and his instincts had hardly ever failed him before.
"I think so too," Syaoran agreed. "I saw a few simple carts passing back and forth. If that's the level of their transportation, then it's possible they'd believe there are places very far away where people don't look quite like they do. We can purchase some new clothes to fit in better if we need to." There were nods all around while Mokona added her input that everything looked pretty and nice, and then they turned toward back toward the dirt road they'd wandered away from as the sounds of hoofbeats and noisy rattles reached them. A heavily laden cart with a lone occupant was slowly trundling away from the town, and after a quick glance at his companions and a nod from Kurogane, Fai stepped away from the little group to go test their theory.
"Hello," the blond called out cheerfully, pushing through the tall grass with countless glowbugs rising up and trailing after him as if he were a ship plowing through a glimmering sea. "We're new in the area, and wondered if-"
What the mage wondered was not to be revealed, for the merchant took one look at Fai and interrupted with a piercing yell. The blond jerked back slightly in surprise at this reaction and then raised one hand placatingly.
"I mean you no harm," he offered, perhaps thinking he'd been mistaken for some sort of highwayman, but he might as well have saved his breath. The local shied away from that pale hand while jerking violently at the reins, and when his poor animal proved too slow for his panic, the man leapt from his cart and headed back for town at a dead run, shouting at the top of his lungs.
"Help! Heeelp! A ghost! A corpse! A WALKING CORPSE!"
Fai blinked and stared after the fleeing man for a moment, then turned to his companions with a rueful smile as the receding cries of, "help me, save me" drifted through the air.
"Plan B?" the mage asked, and Kurogane sighed in annoyance at the stupid turn events had taken. He was not forming a high opinion of the people of this world.
Plan B ended up involving a hasty retreat deeper into the grass to crouch down ignominiously and hope to pass unnoticed as a small crowd poured out of the town with lanterns and - more ominously - torches and rushed out to the abandoned cart to look for the darkling creature their fellow citizen had described. The three seasoned warriors crawled carefully through the meadow, fleeing the fearfully curious eyes of the townspeople. Fai kept unusually serious and silent, which surprised the ninja. Kurogane might have thought the man would be chuckling over being described as some loathsome and dark creature; he with his fair hair and sparkling eyes, pale skin and a general attractiveness that had so far translated well in almost every world they'd visited.
Here, however, apparently life was not measured in breath and hot blood. If you were not alight, you were not alive.
A quick glance showed him the mage's mouth pressing flat into an unhappy line as he glanced back toward the road, and Kurogane made a noise of irritation as he followed the man's gaze. While they had no individual patterns of lights to give their movements away, that same lack also prevented them from blending into the glimmering meadow. They were a splotch of nothing among all the lights, and the trail they made as they bent grasses and disturbed insects was plainly visible as well. There was no forest nearby to lose themselves in, and while they could have likely outrun a half-fearful group of superstitious townspeople, Syaoran's quest was best served by mingling with civilization, not avoiding it.
"Bun, sword," the ninja murmured, determined to at least smack the stupid out of the first townsperson to try and cleanse the "walking corpses" with fire before explanations could be made. It would put a dent into public relations, but it was better to stay safe now and apologize later than have to receive apologies and medical treatment after they'd had burning brands or blows thrown at them. A pale hand darted out to cover Mokona's mouth before she could comply with Kurogane's request, however, and Fai shook his head. Instead of questioning, they all looked at the mage expectantly and waited, Kurogane included. He'd begun relying on the other man even before he'd fully trusted him, and by now it hardly ever occurred to him to question or doubt Fai's decisions.
At least, not the important ones.
Fai's desire to stay up all night drinking with the kid and bun definitely got doubted. Several of Fai's definitions of what constituted dignified employment were questioned strenuously. And Ginryuu still came singing out of its sheath on special occasions, such as the time Fai'd convinced Kurogane that all the men on a particular world wore dresses, when it turned out that they'd simply landed in a very unique part of town.
But he trusted the blond to be serious and sensible when need be, and knew him to be intelligent and brave besides. And so Kurogane never argued these days when Fai made a decision, for the Celesian was no longer motivated by fear and guilt. They'd all of them given the wizard their trust before he'd truly deserved it, had never taken it back, and now moved toward a shared purpose.
Right now, that shared purpose involved not getting exorcised by fire.
Pale hands were working quickly to weave an intricate scrollwork of words in the air, and as Kurogane watched, the whole mass of light was stretched this way and that, reshaped into an almost bird-like form with deft flicks of slender fingers, and then suddenly doubled so that there were two shining bird-shapes floating before the mage. The ninja was suddenly reminded of the inky tattoo that had risen from the mage's body all those years ago at the dimensional witch's shop, and understood what Fai was doing.
The golden scrollwork only took a few breaths to complete and then the mage pushed the two halves firmly onto Syaoran's chest and back where they seemed to seep into the young man's clothing as if made of smoke or something else equally insubstantial. The light made a reappearance almost immediately as tendrils of shimmering gold began creeping along Syaoran's skin, peeping from his sleeves to curl around his wrists and rising up from his collar to encircle his neck, mimicking how the locals were marked. Kurogane was magically tattooed next, and Fai hurriedly instructed the others to remove much of their upper clothing, but to put their cloaks back on. Mokona also got her orders, which were to disgorge a pack and then hide in it. Though they'd seen many animals both small and large, none had spoken to them nor looked much like the fat little bejeweled bun and they decided not to risk her being seen just yet.
"Stand up," whispered Fai, as he wove his own tattoo. "Face away from them and keep your collars up." The wizard hid behind Kurogane's much more substantial bulk as the travelers were spotted and advanced on, and was just re-fastening his long vest over an otherwise bare and shimmering torso as their pursuers came within torch-throwing range.
"Mage..." Kurogane said warningly, as he turned his head to look at the approaching crowd under the pretense of adjusting the strap of the bun-containing bag he'd thrown over one shoulder. If Fai didn't do something soon, there was very likely going to be an altercation between the ninja and the townspeople, and it would definitely put a crimp in Syaoran's attempts to ingratiate himself with the population if fifteen of them had been laid out flat at their first meeting.
"Down, boy," came the murmured response, which just made the dark-haired man growl, but then Fai gathered his cloak close around him, put on a wide smile, and stepped around the glowering ninja to greet the not-so-welcoming committee.
"Hello!" he called out, and the mass of people wading through the grass startled and staggered back, causing a new series of outcries as stragglers smashed into the people in front of them and toes were trod upon by those trying to back away from the "ghost".
"Oh, my apologies," Fai said airily, as if being mistaken for an animated corpse was nothing out of the ordinary, and threw open his cloak to reveal his softly shining markings. "My cloak must have made me look quite unnatural. It's a fashion we picked up on our travels as they're quite cozy, but I must admit I forgot how it would make us look." At this, Kurogane jerked his head to signal to Syaoran that they should step forward, and they unfastened their own cloaks as they did so, laying them over one arm to carry them as Fai did.
The other two seemed to have been forgotten in the instant that the wizard had captured the townspeople's attention, and the murmurs and shouts from the assembled crowd increased as the number of strangers tripled. Fear quickly turned to relief and curiosity as Kurogane and Syaoran's glowing markings were revealed as well, and among the taunts to the merchant for his mistake and subsequent fright were many questions of where the three men had come from and such things. The nimble-tongued and quick-witted wizard answered them all a bit evasively to cover for their ignorance of this world but poured on enough charm that his vagueness went unremarked.
Syaoran was soon in the center of a cluster of curious locals as well, fending off many of their questions by asking various ones of his own about the history of their town and people. The teen's scholastic curiosity led him to sometimes expose the true depth of their ignorance of local customs and culture, but his seeming age and friendly disposition seemed to work with the lie of simply being from far away to keep everyone from any real suspicion. If this place were as peaceful as it so far seemed to be, it was natural that the people here would be lacking in mistrust.
The tall, dark-haired and red-eyed man was no less interesting to the townspeople but he proved himself less lively and keen after conversation than his companions, and soon enough he was left alone, to his satisfaction. He let the others do most of the initial information-gathering and simply stood nearby, listening and observing. The excited, easy-going chatter continued for some time, and nothing caught his attention to make the ninja revise his opinions and impressions. The man who'd been so frightened of the wizard's appearance had gotten over his fright and responded good-naturedly to Fai's apologies and all the teasing of his fellows. A few people even broke away from the interesting strangers to help maneuver the temporarily abandoned horse and cart back onto the path and send the merchant on his way again with shouted farewells and a few last teasing warnings to beware of ghosts. All in all, everyone seemed happy and content and generally cheerful. It was almost like Outo, except with a lower percentage of annoyingly clingy and clamorous girls, which Kurogane heartily approved of.
Also reminiscent of Outo was the ease with which Fai procured them a place to stay and some work to do. As the welcoming party finally broke up and the crowd began to drift back toward the town, the blond drew nearer his companions and quietly relayed some pertinent details.
"They're getting ready for an annual event called the Festival of Light," Fai explained, keeping his voice to a low murmur. "It seems that this is the principal town in the region and all of the inns are full with visitors, but a sweet little old lady who everyone just calls Grams is putting us up in her house in exchange for some manual labor."
Kurogane narrowed his eyes at the mage, certain of who was going to be providing most of the labor, and got a cheeky grin to confirm his suspicions.
"She was very happy when I told her what a hard worker Kuro-Daddy is," chirped the mage, and then laughingly dodged the tanned fist that flew his way. "There's still a lot of construction work to be done before the festival can begin, and it would be a shame for our son to miss out on such a cultural feast by even a minute!"
"The first hammer I lay my hands on is getting buried in your head," Kurogane threatened, remembering the first - but certainly not the last - time the mage had saddled all the hard work on him and then sat back at his ease to just watch instead of helping.
"Oh, don't worry; we'll be carrying our weight as well," Fai promised, as if his thoughts had led the same way. "Grams is going to put me to work in the kitchen and Syaoran-kun's been wrangled into the hanging-of-decorations committee."
Kurogane nodded, not seeing anything wrong with the arrangement, and the rest of the day - apparently called "bloom" on this world - passed in a busy bustle of little nothings and simple work. Though there were many unfamiliar things about the town called Idia, there were also enough similarities to many of the worlds they'd already traveled to that the ninja had no trouble settling in and setting to work without having to ask questions like "what's that?" The people he'd been assigned to help at first raised well-meaning concerns over his lack of a left arm, but he soon proved himself perfectly able to assist with the simple carpentry. His balance and great strength made carrying planks and beams one-handed a mere nothing, and the fact that the people used thick pegs to fasten things together made even hammering a simple chore, since he did not need a second hand to hold nails steady against the wood.
The world was comfortable but not quite so advanced in technology and magic as the worlds they'd individually come from. In Piffle they'd had to learn not just new skills like driving and flying machines but new words as well. Mokona translated everything for them but some words simply didn't exist in Nihon or Celes or Clow, such as "carburetor". Here, however, everything was simple enough to be understandable even if not immediately familiar. Kurogane helped construct standard items such as platforms and small booths without needing instruction, understood the shimmering peach liquid he was given to be similar to beer, and returned to their temporary lodgings to find a fairly familiar looking meal being laid out by the mage on a sturdy table. Thankfully, the food was not shining since once slaughtered or picked, meat and vegetables soon lost their natural light. Though he found the world and all its luminescence beautiful, Kurogane would have found the idea of sparkly food a bit disconcerting.
"Welcome home," the blond called out as he set down mugs of some sort of fragrant tea, and then lowered his voice to a more confidential level. "We let it slip that we didn't know about the festival, so Syaoran-kun and I used the old story about writing a book to explain why we're traveling. Apparently people here tend not to stray too far from where they're born."
Kurogane nodded but made no reply as their hostess made her leisurely way from the kitchen to the dining room with a large woven basket. The woman was tiny and almost tottered as she carried bread enough for a small army, and the ninja took two long strides over to her and silently relieved her of the basket. He received cheerful thanks from Grams and a smile from Fai. Smiles were normal for the mage, even after he'd discarded all the shallow, surface ones he'd been wearing for so many years, but this one seemed to speak more than simply contentment.
A sweet satisfaction in the little pocket of peacefulness they'd fallen into and this cozy little home scene, at being in a place and position to catch the ninja in the little act of kindness, in the knowledge that he knew the man; knew his past and the kindness that had survived it all, knew how he'd changed, knew that he was part of that change...
Kurogane didn't bother wondering if he was reading too much into that smile or speaking any of his thoughts. He simply knew, just as Fai knew him.
The mage and teenager, together with their hostess, kept the conversation going energetically throughout dinner while Kurogane surreptitiously dropped food to Mokona, who was currently hiding under the tablecloth and headbutting the ninja's shins whenever she wanted another morsel. The ninja tried to catch the bejeweled irritant under one heel until Grams laughed at him for being "such a fidgety boy". After that, he spent the rest of the meal glaring at Fai who'd developed a suspicious twitch to his lips and quaver to his voice.
The conversation between most of the party continued, as did the unspoken communication between the ninja and mage. When sleeping arrangements were brought up, the ninja found that the entire upper floor to the two-story house was theirs to use. The little home had once housed a whole family, but Grams was the only occupant now and stiffening joints kept her downstairs except for once a week when she creaked her way up the staircase to dust and air out the rooms.
Upon finding out that there was a master bedroom and one smaller upstairs, Fai immediately offered Syaoran the smaller room for his own so that he could have the peace and quiet so necessary to his studies. The teenager might have protested being given the luxury of privacy before the others, but he was sharp as well as polite, and simply nodded at the room assignments. Kurogane said nothing and did nothing, just standing by and not even making eye contact in what was his usual "do whatever you want; I have no objections" response. He had nothing against rooming with the wizard. He even had a reason - a valid, unselfish reason unrelated to wanting more of that skin and heat - for rooming with him.
It had been a while since Fai had fed from his prey.
Their hostess kept early hours, and the three travelers - and one bun hidden under a cloak thrown casually over an arm - went upstairs soon after dinner to leave her in peace. The party split up a little bit more evenly than previously stated, with Syaoran taking Mokona with him when he retired while the bun reassured him in a noisy whisper that she'd be good and quiet. Kurogane followed the mage into the other room, watching him keenly as the room was investigated and remarked on.
The walls and furniture, like the timbers Kurogane had been working with all day, were no longer part of a living tree and therefore did not glow. The room was still dimly lit, however, with clear bowls piled high with glass globes half-filled with shimmering dust and a pot of those flowers that they'd used to calculate day and night by; this world's version of lamps and a clock. Similar globes had been hanging from the ceiling to light the halls and the rooms downstairs, carefully arranged to spread the light evenly. Slender hands carefully lifted one of these shining spheres for closer examination, bathing the mage's face in golden light. It did not leech the color from Fai's face but it did throw harder shadows across it, and Kurogane frowned to see them.
Fai was not wasting away or growing gaunt, there were no dark circles under his eyes or fang-tips peeping from under his upper lip as he chatted away, and yet he looked hungry to keen red eyes. The impression was partly the ninja's familiarity with all the mage's looks and partly the indefinable pull he felt under his sternum, all along his core, even running along his limbs and thrumming in his head whenever the vampire was needy.
Kurogane knew that Fai did not need to feed as often as he had before regaining his eye and magic. They'd talked - Kurogane argumentative, Fai insistent - twice about it, and the blond had won out in the end because while his prey could still feel that pulling, calling, yearning sensation, it was undeniable that it was weaker than before. Fai also made no attempt to hide the fact that the witch's prediction had proven false in the end, and that the return of his magic had not, in fact, eradicated the vampire essence within him, and this honesty had mollified the ninja to a great degree. Their argument in Clow had actually begun and ended with the simple matter of whether or not Kurogane had recovered from his wounds enough to be able to stand feeding his predator, and the second discussion in the next world had been a much more simple and concise one in which Fai had explained that he didn't seem to need to feed as often as before and promised to speak up when he wished to drink.
Their stay in that first world had been somewhat lengthy and the vampire had proven true to his promise enough times that Kurogane had stopped monitoring him, but a significant amount of time had passed since the last feeding and the ninja was growing...something. Concerned, puzzled, impatient. Perhaps a bit hungry himself for the contact. Not for the act of feeding his vampire itself, of course; the pain was negligible but still he wasn't the sort to go looking for it, and losing blood gave him no joy. There was an intimacy in it though, that he admitted - to himself - to enjoying. It was a lifelong bond between them, and though he had no need of a reminder of Fai's importance to him, it still had value as such. To put it simply, it was another excuse to touch the mage, and he missed it.
Too impatient to wait much longer and telling himself it was just as much for Fai's sake as his own desires, Kurogane leaned against the door and stared at the mage long enough for it to catch the other man's attention. Soon enough Fai ran out of things to examine and ponder over in the room and drifted close to examine him instead. Fai's eyes traced over the golden scrollwork now crawling over tanned skin, curling out from underneath the short jacket that Kurogane had put back on after removing his turtleneck, and the ninja could practically feel those blue eyes on him as if they'd been the mage's fingers instead.
"It looks good on you," the blond finally commented, nodding over his handiwork. "I was in a bit of a rush, of course, so it's not my best artistry. Makes me want to play around with the design a bit."
Kurogane snorted at the desire to use him as a sort of doodle board.
"I bet," he replied dryly. "I'd walk out of here with kittens and flowers all over me if you thought you could get away with it."
"No, I'm serious," the mage protested, which Kurogane muttered his disbelief at in an under-voice while Fai continued to plead his case. "I know I can do a better job, and Kuro-sama deserves the best, doesn't he? Plus it would be fun."
This last was merely casually tacked on, but it caught at the ninja's attention and made him ponder his companion for a moment. Blond eyebrows quirked up at the sudden silent examination.
"I've never seen you use your magic for anything but dire need," the ninja finally commented, after a quick review of his memories. With the other man's oft-times lamentable sense of mischief, he might have expected to have been the victim of a magical prank long ago. Fai's curious expression turned into one of quick surprise, and then he shrugged and gave a little grin.
"Waste not, want not," Fai tossed off casually, and looked as if he was casting about for another topic to turn to, but Kurogane would not let the matter drop so quickly.
"It's not like you're still working with a limited supply of power," he argued. "And you're the one always recommending that we rest and relax when we can."
"And as the head of the household, Father should set a good example and lead the way," Fai countered, trying to turn the conversational table onto him. Kurogane smacked it right back without a pause.
"Drop that joke already," he said first out of sheer habit. "I already do; the kid and I spar. Training's useful but it's also relaxing and feels good. Your magic's the same; a weapon but also something you can use for something as simple as chasing a bit of fun."
"Careful Kuro-sama," came the teasing comment, backed by a ever so faintly uneasy-sounding laugh. "I might think you were concerned about my happiness."
The ninja scowled at this effort to embarrass him, now that the attempt to shift the focus had failed. Fai seemed startled or at least uncomfortable with the idea of using his power when there was no real need to. It was understandable, Kurogane supposed, knowing what he did of the mage's history. Their great power was one of the reasons the twins had been so cruelly used, and Fai had trained in his magic knowing that someday he might have to use it to murder. He'd found himself unable to learn anything but offensive spells, feared his magical power as the reason he might someday betray and slaughter the king to whom he owed such a deep debt of gratitude to, and perhaps even saw it as the foundation for all the curses both real and imagined that he'd suffered under.
"I didn't turn you just so you could continue to exist," the ninja stated bluntly, giving the other man the conversational equivalent of a sharp smack. "I did it so you could live, health and happiness included."
This put an abrupt end to the verbal squirmings and the conversation ceased for a few minutes as well. They just looked at one another for a while, and then the blond head nodded slowly.
"Yes, I know," Fai said quietly, and that seemed to be that. Kurogane let the matter rest for now, and picked up the threads of the conversation again, only to follow it back to the thing he'd been thinking of when he first entered the room.
"Speaking of which...you're thirsty."
Fai looked up at him, then smiled and nodded as if he'd merely commented that the weather was nice, or that dinner had been good.
"I know," the blond said simply. "Not yet, though."
The simple admission and continued delay surprised Kurogane. Not that he'd been expecting a laugh and a lie or a bitter argument, of course. But just as before, when he'd known Fai was lying without realizing what the lies were hiding, now he knew that the mage was being honest and yet he still did not understand Fai's thoughts.
"Why?" he asked, frowning a bit.
"Why not?" Fai returned with a quirk of pale eyebrows, and then laughed apologetically at the glare this non-answer provoked. "I'm not being difficult. I just want to...test my boundaries. To see how long I can go without, and whether the thirst will get any worse than it is now or whether it's already plateaued."
Kurogane wanted to ask why, but immediately saw some logic behind the idea and kept silent. Knowing one's limits, both weaknesses and strengths, was crucial for a warrior after all. As if misinterpreting the ninja's silence as disapproval, Fai soon expanded on the explanation on his own anyway, giving the taller man the clarity he'd been about to ask for.
"Regaining my magical powers didn't cure me of the vampirism, but it is repressing it somewhat," Fai said softly, looking down and pressing one hand to his chest as if physically trying to gauge or hold back the hunger for his companion's blood. "Part of seeing how hungry I get is simple curiosity, but I think it would be useful to know whether I can go completely without. If we get separated again like we did in Yama, but this time you from I, won't you feel better for knowing I'm not starving to death? And you don't actually want me to pine away and die when you're gone, do you?"
Kurogane chose not to reply to the questions they both knew the answers to, ignoring the short, lilting laugh at the end and instead watching the wistfulness that washed over that expressive face. Fai would miss him when he was dead, and terribly. But until that day, whenever it should come, they had each other yet.
"Fine," Kurogane said, agreeing with the experiment. As if hoping to avoid further surprise attacks from the ninja, Fai drifted away from him to look out the window on the opposite wall soon after. As far as tactical retreats went, it was a poor effort; Kurogane pushed away from the wall and slowly closed the distance between them. There were many things between them that he felt needed no words, but some things, he supposed, were best clarified. As he reached the other side of the room, he looked out the window at the endlessly dark sky instead of meeting the blue eyes that were now turned up toward him once again.
"But if you find that you can go without...don't," he said quietly. World to world, cultures and climates and currency had changed, but the night sky had always been the same; vast and dark and thick with sparkling stars. Someday he wanted to stand under well-known constellations again and teach the mage how to pick out the Archer, Dragon and Great River. He wanted to continue the unlikely friendship that had grown up between them, and wanted also to be more than friends if Fai would allow it. "Blood's the price I paid to keep you with me. I'm willing to keep paying it."
He'd never said it so simply and clearly; his stated reasons had always been to keep Fai alive, to make him face up to his current realities and impending future like a man ought to. He'd never confessed that he'd simply been unable to let the wizard go. Red eyes dropped from unfamiliar stars to gaze at a beloved face, but he was a split second too late; Fai looked down just as Kurogane turned his head to look at him, and the ninja missed the other's reaction - if there had been any - to his words.
"I know," the mage murmured after a short silence, voice low as he repeated his earlier words. "Not yet, though."
Hearing any less keen than Kurogane's would have missed the near-whispers, and though his hand rose unbidden toward that downturned face at the husky tone that had roughened the last few words, it fell back to his side when the wizard suddenly turned and stepped away. If the blond had immediately fled the room he would have given chase, but Fai only stepped over to the packs he'd brought up earlier, picking up one of them and then turning to throw him a strange little smile.
"I'm going to get ready for bed," Fai announced. "You should too; there are still a couple more days of baking and building before we get to enjoy the festival."
He nodded and then frowned slightly as he watched the blond slip out of the room. Kurogane's assumptions had so far been that it was only newness and nerves making the other man so skittish in these moments they had together. What he'd seen in those blue eyes the night before had put a new thought in his head, and Kurogane now wondered if it truly was fear causing all these sudden breaks away. He felt certain that this fear was not fear of him specifically - the gods only knew he'd hurt the man and often, but it had never been out of sheer sadistic pleasure in inflicting pain - and wondered what fragments of Fai's past there might be that reflected the reason for this timidity of manner.
There might had been pivotal scenes that Ashura of Celes had suppressed when exposing his prodigy's past to the man's companions. A heart so riddled with self-loathing would have hardly been proof against manipulation, coercion, or even the temptation of a meaningless, cheap affair even more damaging than an utter lack of any sort of intimacy. Fai had also not always been a powerful wizard and able warrior; he'd been young and weak once...easy prey.
Whether it was nervousness or fear motivating Fai's behavior, however, it did not change Kurogane's.
The mage returned to their room and the ninja took his turn having a quick washing-up and changing into the simpler clothing they used for sleeping when they had the luxuries of four walls and a roof, clean floors and bedding. The taller stepped back into the bedroom to find it quiet and still, the mage hardly more than an extra lumpy section of bedding capped with a mop of fair hair. The room was much dimmer now as well, the globes of light under cloth coverings sewn into snugly fitting shapes, which he was grateful for. It was disconcerting enough to have his own arm glittering at him. He might have had trouble sleeping with the unnatural distraction of a well-lit room.
After a last glance out the window and around the room out of habit, Kurogane settled himself into the space Fai had left for him in the wide bed. He lay facing outward, also out of habit; unable even in the most peaceful-seeming worlds to be comfortable in leaving his back facing the most unguarded direction. He almost always faced the door, and generally moved the bed if it was smack up against a wall or too near a window. He slept best with some space - or Fai - at his back.
The bed was large enough that even with his stature there was a fair bit of space between them, and true to his latest habit, he waited for it to disappear. Some time passed during which both men were silent save for even breaths, and then the blond began to shift. A restless shrug, a little wriggle, an adjustment to long legs...soon enough there were strands of long hair tickling at the ninja's neck and warmth seeping through his thin shirt from a forehead resting lightly between his shoulders and hands curled into the loose material lower down his back.
Plausible deniability was an interesting thing. He knew the mage was awake and was sure that Fai knew he was too light a sleeper to let all this movement and proximity go unnoticed even from a trusted friend, and yet the mage never snuggled up without waiting a while first and Kurogane never did more than simply allow it. He never turned around and drew the other closer, never reached back to draw a pale hand over his side, never spoke. At first he'd thought Fai nervous and had decided to let the other set the pace. Now he thought Fai might be fearful and continued to refrain from reaching for more.
He wanted more, but wouldn't scorn what he had already out of greed or selfishness. Fai's tendency in the past had been to flee; he didn't want to make the mage backslide. Time would let Fai get used to this - to them, to him - and settle his nerves, and time would also help proof outweigh the past and settle Fai's fears. Whichever it was, or even if it was both, if time was all that the mage needed, Kurogane was willing to give it.
So it was, and so it continued that these nights in which they roomed together passed without comment, and it wasn't until the early morning when Kurogane woke and knew that his bedmate was unconscious that he indulged in a caress of his own; a soft brush of the backs of his fingers against a sleep-flushed cheek, idly rearranging some of that unruly golden hair, and once in a while, a kiss stolen more carefully than any coin ever lifted from a dragon's hoard.
