So now that we actually kind of know the band set-up Adam's going with I'm going to use them (because the Misses Keisha and Reina and Mr. London seem wonderful.) But since I'm too lazy to go back and correct that in the first chapter, please just accept this as my lame band-transition.
(I know I said this chapter would come soon... I guess I lied. I suck, I know. Sorry for any of you who were actually interested/waiting!)
Again, I OWN NOTHING and this in no way portrays actual events. I'm just a creepy fangirl. That's it. Let me know what you think, I absolutely love hearing from you all!
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Being on tour was exhausting, but stepping onto the stage every night I knew that this was where I belonged: on stage in the lights with my best friends and band mates right beside me, reaching out to other people with my music. Singing was what made sense to me. Despite all the hazy late nights, screwy sleep patterns, and hectic last minute show things, I wouldn't trade this for anything in the world.
"Good evening ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to the final stop on our Trespassing tour." I paused, grinning as the crowd roared back at me in greeting. "Now, as you may have noticed, we have some slightly off-putting visitors outside tonight." I waited again, this time for the crowd to stop making various noises of disapproval toward the Westboro protestors. "I know, I know…" I said, trying to quiet them down. "I had a minute to talk to a few of them earlier, and they promised to play nice. Let's just all show them how much more powerful love is than hate and be the bigger people." I could sense my band rolling their eyes on either side of me. "But if any of them give you a hard time, tell them Adam says to fuck off." The crowd cheered raucously at this, as I knew they would. I smiled out at them.
Tommy and Ashley started playing a familiar set of chords over and over and the crowd grew even louder as I finished my mini-speech to them. "Do you guys know this one?" I asked, chuckling at the response. "You'll have to be a little indulgent with me here, because we had to do this one tonight. It has an amazing message. It's talking about how you are all beautiful and perfect just the way you are. And no matter who you are, no matter what your orientation, gender, religion, or ethnicity is, you were born this way. Don't ever let anyone tell you that that's a bad thing. I wanna hear you all sing this one with me!"
The chords stopped their loop as I finished talking and began the song. "My momma told me when I was young, we're all born superstars." I smiled toward my mom who was seated in the box seats up at the top of the venue as I sang and she blew me a kiss back. "She rolled my hair and put my lipstick on in the glass of her boudoir."
I stepped to the front of the stage and sang to the front row. "'There's nothing wrong with loving who you are,' she said, 'cuz you were made perfect, babe.'
"So hold your head up, girl, and you'll go far. Listen to me when I say… I'm beautiful in my way, 'cuz there are no mistakes. I'm on the right track, baby I was born this way. Don't hide yourself in regret, just love yourself and you're set. I'm on the right track, baby I was born this way!"
I finished the slightly altered version of Gaga's anthem, singing to specific faces in the crowd as much as possible to get the song's message across. I chuckled thinking of Sutan goofily singing the song earlier and strutting around on the tour bus when the line "Don't be a drag, just be a queen" came up. The crowd applauded and whooped in response as I finished the last chorus.
Following this were my own songs. As much as I loved doing covers, there was something different about getting to perform my own songs; especially since I had written so many of these ones myself. It might sound cheesy, but they really were like my children—they reflected the thoughts that I couldn't quite get across in any other medium, they showed the inner workings of my mind that even I didn't know were there. I'm an outgoing person and love talking with people, but music is where I can fully express myself.
Keeping up the upbeat atmosphere from Born This Way, I sang Cuckoo and Naked Love next. Watching the crowd dancing and singing along and grinning like fucking maniacs gave me so much energy and a huge stage high. These songs felt so natural, singing and performing them was like breathing for me and that made it so much more fun. They didn't have to be forced—I could just let myself get lost in the music and enjoy being in the moment.
Of course, that all got changed with the next two songs—Runnin' and Underneath . As much as the previous ones had given me energy, these took almost everything out of me. I poured out everything I had when we did these songs. These two songs in particular took me back to a very dark place that I had to tap into in order to perform them the way they deserved to be. Performing them was an extreme form of catharsis, but it left me feeling completely hollow and drained. Which is why I picked a kick-ass cover to follow them.
I waited for the crowd to stop cheering when Tommy played the last note in Underneath, a haunted smile on my face as I mentally got ready to brush off the heaviness of the song.
"Alright, let's lighten things up a little bit in here!" I said to the audience. "Are any of you Mika fans?" I smiled as the crowd cheered wildly. "Me too, I love him. This is one of his songs, and it's about when everyone is telling you, 'Be this, be that,' and you just want to say, 'You know what? Fuck you. I'm going to be me. And if you don't like that then tough.'"
"Do I attract you, do I repulse you, with my queasy smile? Am I too dirty, am I too flirty, do I like what you like?" I walked around the stage, singing the playful song in the overly theatrical style that caused it to be written. "I could be wholesome," I struck a dignified, good-boy pose with the line, "I could be loathsome," I did just the opposite here and stuck out my tongue in a belligerent bad-boy, rock-star pose. "Guess I'm a little bit shy. Why don't you like me, why don't you like me, without making me try?" I loved seeing how many of my fans were singing along with the song. Clearly, it was a good choice to do a Mika cover.
"I tried to be like Grace Kelly," I sang, going into the chorus, "but all her looks were too sad. So I tried a little Freddie," There was an extra-loud bout of cheers from my fans at that line since I had just done the Queen shows a few months ago. "I've gone identity mad!"
I finished the ultra-catchy pop song with the same playful, "Ka-ching!" as Mika, laughing a bit automatically.
"This next one..." I smiled in response to the over-enthusiastic screaming. I mean seriously, I hadn't even said what the song was yet. I appreciated the positive energy though. "Wow, you all are awesome!" I said laughing. "This next one was the first single off of Trespassing... it's called Better Than I Know Myself."
The final chunk of the set was compromised of two of my new songs and one old one. Broken English, Whataya Want From Me, and finally Trespassing. We also had an awesome cover planned as an encore if the audience asked for it, too.
I tried to hold onto each moment on stage, knowing this was the final show. It always goes by in such a haze when I'm in the moment and really feeling the songs—time is a nonentity when you're performing. Before I even fully registered it, I was regretfully informing everyone that it was the last song of the evening.
"I want to say thank you to each and every one of you for coming out here and jamming with us tonight. Do you want to meet the band before we do the last song?"
It was a rhetorical question, obviously. My bandmates have become like a second family. Since we spend so much time together while on tour it's impossible not to get close to everyone and they're all incredible people. Not to mention it's just good stage etiquette beside that.
"On the drums, we have the always wonderful Mr. Brian London, give it up!" The crowd cheered as Brian waved and did a short drum solo. I smiled at him, knowing we'd both miss this. "And on backup vocals we have these two lovely ladies, Miss Keisha and Miss Reina." They both danced and laughed with me to the music still looping in the background as the audience cheered some more. "On the bass is the very talented Miss Ashley Dzerigian." Ashley smiled shyly before ripping out her own solo. "And over here on guitar, you've all seen his pretty face before, is Mr. Tommy Joe Ratliff!" That's weird—Tommy didn't even look up at me. I shrugged it off as one of Tommy's many odd ways of trying to not show emotion. The crowd finally finished cheering.
"Give it up for my amazing band one more time!" I said, grinning. As the applause and woots began to fade down I tried to channel that energy into our final song. "Sadly, this is our last song tonight." I had to laugh a little bit as the audience groaned and booed. It was hollow though, and I couldn't conceal the sadness in my voice completely. "I know, I don't want to go either. You guys have been so great. Thank you for being a part of this unbelievable tour. We're going to end on a positive note, because here in the Glamily, we like to keep shit positive." I jokingly turned around to Keisha and Reina who solemnly nodded to the audience in agreement with my statement. "This one is the title track," I had to stop as I was cut off with cheers, "Yeah? You all need to sing it with us then!"
Trespassing was an explosion of energy. It was definitely one of my favourites to perform and tonight was one of the best times we had with it. Toward the end of the song someone in the audience threw a pair of panties onto the stage, which I held up, made a "what the fuck do you expect me to do with these?" expression, and threw them back out into the audience. The song was over before I knew it and I was walking backstage with a final wave and blowing a few kisses out to the audience. My fans never cease to amaze me with their dedication and passion. They seemed to think it was the end of the world, even probably guessing that I was only going backstage to grab some water and wait for the right moment to come back out for the encore.
