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The Avatar's Redemption

Book 1: Awakening

Chapter 8: A Wavering Mind

Sunlight crept through the curtains of Terran's dusty hospital room and warmed his face. Terran shut his eyes and clasped the rough edges of the hospital blanket. He hadn't slept the entire night; he was afraid he wouldn't have woken up if he did.

Terran's muscles strained and his bones creaked as he tried to get out of bed. Terran's knees shook on his way to the bathroom; he splashed his face with tepid water and stared at his reflection. His face was cracked and it reminded him of the sand in the Si Wong Desert. His eyes weren't a bright emerald green anymore; instead they were cloudy and gray. It almost looked like cobwebs were stretched across his eyes. Each strand of web held a secret that anyone could see if they looked deep enough into his eyes. Terran let out a heavy sigh.

Terran walked back to the bed and picked up the scrolls that were on the nightstand. The scrolls shook in his sweaty palms and every time he tried to open them the room would shake. Terran felt like he was losing his mind. He managed to open up one of the scrolls; it was titled, The Last Airbender. "This can't be real. It just can't be," Terran thought to himself, "It was just a dream. That's all it was."

Terran tried desperately to calm his nerves, "I had a bad dream because of the stress I was feeling. Of course that was why I had the dream. I'm fine. I can't let a senseless story or nightmares get to me." Terran repeated the same phrase over and over again, "I'm fine it was just a dream…I'm fine it was just a dream…I'm fine it was just a dream."

Terran lugged himself to the window and peered out at the city. It was such a beautiful place; there were buildings that rose above the clouds and the sun's rays would bounce of the towers and illuminate the whole city. A river swept through the city and children would constantly play in it with their race boats, much to frustration of the merchants. Hover-crafts would race against the skyline and paint a picture of vibrant, neon lights. "I'm fine," Terran repeated.

"Agh!" A piercing pain shot through Terran's skull. He wrapped his fingers around his head and fell to his knees. His eyes flashed a bright white and he could see a flood of images in his mind. Each was of a glorious city where benders of all nations lived in harmony. He felt the tremendous joy of those who lived there, but as the city started to fall apart after each progressive image he felt the pain of those who lived there. The city fell apart further and further until it was nothing more but wasteland. Terran felt only a dead silence now.

The vision finished and Terran's eyes returned to their cloudy state. Terran's entire body trembled and he gasped for air while he struggled to get back on his feet. "No! It's just a hallucination! It's because of the stress of the war! The stress!" Terran would not yield to these delusions. He ran out of the room and headed for the Southern Earth Nation.

Terran treaded lightly down a path of red, sun-dried earth; he was surrounded by a lush field of brightly arrayed flora. This was one of the few places that hadn't been touched by the invasion of the water nation. Terran welcomed a slight gush of air against his face. Even though Terran loved the beauty of the field, this wasn't his destination. Terran walked further south and as he walked the landscape slowly changed. It transitioned from brightly colored foliage to charred earth that was laden with scraps of burnt and contorted metal. Terran's eyes grew misty at the sight, "What happened to the Earth Nation…" He could only think to blame the water benders and their quest for power, but deep down in the abyss of his thoughts he doubted himself.

Terran had called for scrap pick-up earlier and they had just arrived along with a shuttle of a few displaced individuals looking for a home. Terran dumped all the scraps of metal onto the loading dock and wished them a safe trick back.

Terran turned his attention to the group of men, women, and children huddled together in silent confusion; Terran's heart ached for his people, the people he was supposed to protect, but he cleared his mind and did his best to smile. Terran said nothing as he turned his back towards them. He shifted the earth and cleared the ground in a methodical pattern until finally he had created a small village for the people. "Now I understand this isn't much but volunteers from Neo Ba Sing Se will be here shortly. They will fix up the place and give you some of the best tech we've got," Terran said in what he hoped was a reassuring tone.

The people surrounded him with bright faces and a few children with tears in their faces pushed their way through the crowd so they could hug Terran's legs; they were all just happy it was finally over. Terran did his best not to get too emotional and thought to himself, "I'm doing the right thing…nothing's wrong with me." Terran wished the crowd good-bye and headed back for the field, hopefully, he would be able to spend some time there.

*Beep…Beep* Terran's communications disk had gone off. He pulled the crystalline disk out of his pocket and saw Toshi's face on the screen; he considered just letting the call go to voicemail. He hesitantly answered and a small grainy hologram of Toshi appeared before him. Even though Terran knew Toshi had a knack for getting back on his feet he was still worried about his friend, "Toshi why aren't you resting? You need to recover from the battle in the North" Toshi gave a quick but uneasy smirk, "I could say the same to you. Are you all right? You don't look so great. Did you get any sleep last night; you have some serious bags under your eyes. Where are you anyway?"

"I'm fine…I'm fine. I'm down south; I was helping out a few guys." Terran could see that Toshi was beginning to get impatient; Toshi always was a busy body, "Well you need to head back. The General needs to tell us something. Take the transport bridge." Terran mumbled under his breath, "I hate the transport bridge…That's fine I'll be there soon."

"It's not in the meeting hall by the way. This time he wants us to meet him in his private quarters." Terran was amazed; the general never let anyone into his private quarters. "Well I guess I better hurry up then, huh?" Terran responded in a sarcastic tone; the General always had a way to call a meeting at the most inopportune times.

Terran walked out of the transport bridge and down to Toshi, who had been anxiously tapping his feet. Questions of doubt bounced around in Terran's head but he did his best not to unravel in front of Toshi. Toshi had noticed that Terran wasn't walking with the same confidence, "What's wrong?" Terran stared down at his feet; he knew the cobwebs in his eyes would give something away, "Nothing, nothing at all. Hey come on we better hurry." Terran carried himself in a light sprint and Toshi followed closely behind.

They had arrived at the General's quarters a few minutes later. His lodging was a relatively small sized shack that was colored a dull and faded green with a soundproof metal coating. Terran and Toshi entered the room and saw the General sitting down with a holographic image of the North in front of him. The General clearly hadn't been sleeping. His hair was disheveled and his eyes were more sullen than usual, in fact; he looked as if he had aged another ten years altogether. "Sit down," mumbled the General.

The General closed down the hologram and rubbed his swollen eyes, "All right, here's the deal. I know the Siege didn't go as planned but I don't believe it was a total failure. The fire and water nations lost a lot of men and heavy machinery; the earth benders living there seemed to have noticed this too because more of the towns people are starting to revolt and cause unrest. I know this is going to sound insane but I can't allow another failure to end up on my list. I won't let those guys down there get hurt anymore," Terran's heart rose up to his throat, "that's why I will be forming a silent espionage group. Since the Dai Lee Elite and you two are still recovering, I've decided to bring members of the royal guard with me to lay down the final blow…but that's not all I called you two in for."

"I know you two are recovering but I need you guys to scout the fire nation and water nation for possible weak spots." Terran jumped in, "Why do we need to do that?!" The General raised an eyebrow and observed Terran tensely, "Because Terran, we will be planning an invasion of the two nations in the coming months. It will soon be our time to strike back," Terran felt like he was going to vomit, "Toshi you will head to the United Southern/Northern Water Nations and Terran you will head to the Fire Nation. Understood? Good. I expect full reports in one week."

The General stood up and walked out of the room. Terran gritted his teeth at the thought of entering the Fire Nation as a spy. Terran whispered to himself in the depths of his mind, "No. I'm fine. I need to do this, to see my enemy so I can remember why I am doing this. I'm alright…I'm alright…" Toshi patted Terran on the back and wished him good luck; Toshi left the room in a hurry. Terran took in a breath of relief. He wouldn't have been able to keep his thoughts to himself if he was with Toshi.

Terran walked down the street of a quiet fire nation town known as Rahm. He was dressed in fire nation garb but one only need to look at him closely to know he was an outsider. Lucky for him everyone was glued to their projectors. They were all watching live coverage of the "Terror in the North", as the local media had dubbed it. Terran smiled to himself, "Looks like the old man's going to do it," Terran thought.

Terran had already scouted ten locations that might be good targets for an attack and decided he needed to relax a bit. Terran looked through the window of a small and scanty tea shop; Terran knew the Fire Nation was famous for their Jasmine Tea and decided he might as well see if the stories were true.

A bell chimed as Terran opened the door. This appeared to be the only place where no one was watching the news. Every step he took caused the floorboards to squeak, much to his annoyance. He sat down across from a young family with a small baby. The baby coed and babbled at Terran; Terran let out a quick smile but immediately removed it from his face, "What am I doing? That baby is just going to become some fire breathing soldier that will kill my people. He's an enemy. There all enemies."

A stout and hefty old man with a short gray beard came up to Terran and spoke in a calm and soothing voice, "What can I get for you my young friend." "Just a cup of Jasmine," Terran responded. The old man chortled, "Ah yes Jasmine tea, one of my favorites." Terran reached in his pocket and realized he had no money to pay the man, embarrassed he quickly stood up and headed for the door.

The old man had a keen eye and could see when someone was having a hard time, "Excuse me young man, don't you want your tea?" "I'm afraid I don't have any money," Terran responded, ashamed that he was asking his enemy to pardon him. The old man walked over to the young family and picked up the chattering baby, "Why I'm sure this family here won't mind helping out a nice young man like you." The family knew the old man well. They were frequent drinkers at the tea shop and knew the old man was always trying to brighten someone's day. The family also knew he would reimburse them for the extra purchase of tea in some way, shape, or form not that it bothered them too much.

Terran became red-faced, "No, no it's fine." "Nonsense," said the old man, "come on over and enjoy your tea." The family encouraged Terran to sit down and Terran reluctantly agreed, afraid that if he didn't it might seem suspicious; at least that is what he told himself.

Terran took a sip of the Jasmine Tea and his heart was immediately warmed by the soothing flavor. Terran couldn't deny it; the Fire Nation most certainly had the best tea in all the nations. "There, you see? You can always find a friend somewhere, even amongst strangers!" said the old man in hearty laugh.

Terran's mind went back to the charred remains of the once beautiful Earth Nation valleys and to the displaced individuals he had helped. Terran scanned the tea shop, he looked at the calm and serine face of the old man, and at the cheerful family that was happily chatting with him as if he was one of their own and knew that in a few months they would all end up like those poor people in the Earth Nation. That's if they were lucky.

For the first time, Terran actually wondered if he was doing the right thing. Terran could only hear one thought bounce across inside his mind, "What's wrong with me…"

Next chapter preview: After spending some more time in the fire nation, Terran decides to confide his troubles in his closest friend Toshi. How will Toshi react to what Terran has to say?