Three
Pain Relief
Something you said sits in my head,
It's been there too long, it's killing me slowly
It's rolling around, it's pushing me down, it's keeping the good part of me closed
Can't you see that when I find you I'll find me.
- When I Find You, Joshua Radin and Maria Taylor.
Clove
The summer I was 14 me and my sisters went to stay with my aunt and it was needless to say I had changed a lot. My ebony hair had changed from waves to large loopy curls, and I had gotten a bit taller. I walked into training on the first day in a white tank top and exercise shorts. My old uniform had out grown me a few months ago and I couldn't get a new one.
"Hi Cato." I said on the first day back.
He chocked on his water. "Clover are you trying to kill me?"
"Um no." I said wairily.
"Good then don't sneak up on me like that." He said. "So how have you been?"
"Great!" I smiled.
"That's something I've not heard from you in a long time." He smiled.
"Yeah I know. What makes it so much better is that my dad isn't going to be around anymore, mom finally filed for a divorce." I sighed, it had been a huge relief when she finally broke that news to us. At least on me.
"Well that came about 13 years too late." He growled.
"At least it happened." I laughed weakly, before he could answer I was called over by my instructor and the day had begun.
At lunch I sat outside cleaning my knives, it was our job to keep our weapons clean and organized, if we ever lost one the punishment was severe. Cato sat next to me sharpening the sword he worked with. That's when she came up, Ariel, the biggest air head in class.
"Hi Cato." Ariel said.
"Hi." He muttered, She sat on his lap, where the sword wasn't.
"Care to introduce me?" I asked.
"Oh Clove I didn't think you'd heard, but this is Ariel my girlfriend." Cato said.
"Well that's a little detail you left out earlier." I said, not being able to bite back the scowl that had crept up on my face.
The rest of the day I spent in silence and on the way home I let Cato do all the talking. "What's up?" He asked about half way home.
"Nothing." I answered.
"Do you like Ariel?" He asked.
"You could do better." I muttered, it's true he could. He's tall, well-built and he's a career, which is about all anyone ever takes into consideration around here.
"Well there are only like two other girls in our class and that's Bubbly or you." He frowned.
"I would prefer even Bubbly." I muttered. "Hey! What's wrong with me?"
"Nothing your just_"
"Just what?" I snapped. When he didn't answer he was lucky my knife missed his ear.
"God what was that for?" He yelled.
"So you think I'm inadequate?" I snarled.
"No I just think that-" MY next knife skimmed his arm, "Ow!" I grabbed my knives and ran off down the street. Cato was still calling my name, but I didn't turn back.
Only when I was home did I stop to wonder what was wrong with me. Cato caught up with me and grabbed my shoulder.
"Clove there is nothing wrong with you." He panted. "You've been gone all summer Clove." He was right.
"I would still prefer Bubbly." I said and he smiled, I knew that for now everything was going to be okay, it always would be.
"Well I like her." He muttered.
"Why?" I asked.
"She's pretty."
"I ought to have figured that was why."
"Night Clove."
"Night Cato."
I turned and went back inside, smiling my mother was sitting next to the oil lamp, she looked up at me. "What happened?"
"Nothing, why?" I closed the door behind me and went to sit down.
"You're smiling you almost never smile anymore Clove." She said.
"I smile, sometimes." I muttered.
"Well what made you smile?" She asked. I didn't answer. "Was it a boy in your class?"
"No mom it was just something funny Cato said." I answered.
"Cato's a boy." She pointed out.
"Oh gee, I hadn't figured that out. Did you know he's like four inches taller than me now?" I asked.
"Really? That's what his mother said but I didn't believe her." MY mom said, she and Cato's mom were friends and that how Cato and I became friends. The kind of friends who throw knives and sword fight each other for fun. Hey, what are friends for right?
I changed quickly and crawled in bed next to my sisters. Hazel and Nutmeg instantly wielded themselves to the area around me. Paprika molded to the wall, as usual, with her thumb in her mouth.
The next day I was early for my meeting with Cato. He seemed a little surprised when I was sitting on his front porch sharpening my knives.
"Hi Clove, your unnaturally early." He yawned, he never has been a morning person.
"Yeah I am, I had a hard time sleeping." I said.
"What's up?" He asked knowing instantly that something was up.
"Nothing." I muttered.
"Come on Clove, out with it." He stood in front of me, blocking my way.
"Look if I really wanted to tell you I would!" I snapped.
"Okay I'm not going to pressure you into telling me." He said.
"Really because that sounds kind of like what you're doing." I smiled at him in a not-so-sweet way.
"Okay I'll just shut up now." He sighed in defeat.
We walked the next three miles to the training center in silence. I walked over to the knife station and started to sharpen my knives. I was about half way threw the set when some ones fist collided with the side of my face. I dropped the knives as I fell backwards, I heard a sickening crack as I landed. I looked up. My dad.
I probably would have gotten up and hit him back if Cato wasn't already there. "Leave her alone!" Cato's fist collided with my dad's face, even I heard the crack and couldn't help but wince, that had to hurt.
"Cato!" The trainer yells. Cato seems to snap out of it as his eyes fall once again to where the rest of us are. A large crowd has now gathered about twenty feet away. I start to get up and as I put my hand on the bench I feel a sharp pain. I quickly remove it, my hand hangs limply from the wrist down. Broken. I try to stand again using the other hand, only to find I've sliced the top of it open with my knives when I fell.
"Clove." Someone mutters. I try again to stand, this time it doesn't work because I've also cut into a good portion of my calf. I decide on rolling out of the way, and finally using my one good leg I stand only to start falling over a few seconds later, but someone catches me. The medic.
"Lay still, I'll have to stich you up and set the bone." HE ordered.
"Where's Cato?" I asked, warily.
"Removing that scum from the building." He answered. I didn't bother telling him that scum is my father, because around there that's the kind of thing that gets you picked on.
By the time Cato returned the bone was being set. He was the only one who was not afraid to come near me, which proves the point that they don't do a very good job around here. These dandelions are killers who were terrified of a little blood, maybe some bone, they won't last a day in the arena.
"You okay Clove?" HE asked, surveying the damage.
"Yeah, it's only a few cuts and a broken wrist." I shrugged.
"Yeah, only cuts that required a total of 15 stitches." He raised his eyebrows to which I rolled my eyes.
"Cato, please." I whispered he gots the message and nodded. The door bangsed open and all of our heads turned. My family, this day was going to be just wonderful. My mom rushed in.
"Clove." She said.
"HI mom, I'm fine I assure you." I said.
"Honey, you're going to have to watch your sisters, they're over there." She gestured and I saw my sisters, Nutmeg was looking around at the other kids training, her eyes were the size of frying pans, Hazel was waving cheerily at Cato and Paprika was sucking her thumb.
"What why?" I asked.
"Your father's home. You will be staying with Cato tonight." She explained hastily. "I'm so sorry. Are you okay? I heard about the accident."
"I'm fine, they gave me something for the pain, we're getting the bone set now and then I'll be back to training." I said.
"Are you sure you want to go back to training?" She asked.
"Yeah mom I'm sure, just leave the girls here and I'll take them with us." I told her.
"Okay, if you're sure." She kissed my forehead and rushed out of the training center. The medic announced me done and I sat up, gathered my knives and moved back to the targets.
Thud! Thud! Thud! My knives hit the target one after the other, my anger boiling over and I'm taking it all out on the training dummies. As I disappear into my own world and let my self go completely. In Hand-to-hand I managed to take down Cato, he grins up at me and then as he raises his sword we hear a scream. I looked up. Nutmeg.
"Nutmeg!" I shouted I rolled off of Cato and rushed over to her. She seemed terrified. "Meggy, what's wrong?" I stroked her face, and realized she was terrified of me. "Nutmeg, I wasn't going to hurt him and he wouldn't hurt me, do you understand?" She was still shaking but managed a nod, so I pulled her into a quick hug and led her and the other girls out into the waiting room.
"Yes." The lady at the desk said.
"Can my sisters sit out here?" I Asked.
"Sure." She nodded and I lead them to three chairs and told them to stay there until we came for them. I felt something trickling down my leg, damn, I had torn the stiches.
As the day came to a close Hazel and Paprika fell asleep, Cato grabbed HAzil and I grabbed Paprika. Nutmeg walked some distance behind us. When we opened the door to his house, I was instinctively quiet, but his whole family was awake, his mother had the table set, his sister was cleaning up the living room and his dad was in District 4 (Peacekeeper buissness) I tried hard not to cry, why did they have to be so perfect?
I managed to hold it together until bedtime. I am put in Cato's room, he sleeps on the floor but I can't get comfortable. The emotions of the day take over and I silently let the tears trickle down my face. Cato reaches up and takes my small hand in his.
