Between a Rock and a Hard Place
Chapter 4
Isao Kondo stood still in the middle of the room when every eye fell on him. Eh, what? What did I do wrong?
Kagura walked up to Kondo at a very fast pace and grabbed his collar. She then shook him like a ragged doll. "What are you saying, Gorilla? Where are you thinking from, your baby toe? Do you want to get me killed?!"
"What… get you killed? What are you talking about, Kagura-chan?" Kondo asked confusedly and dizzily when he was finally released from Kagura's iron grip. His head was spinning because his brain was shook so hard that it was unable to comprehend things around him. Hijikata inhaled his cigarette and spoke up quietly.
"What's wrong with sleeping with your sibling? I mean, he is your brother, right?"
"Just shut up and keep on consuming cancer, Mayora. Anyway, I'm not going to sleep with this idiot for sure. I'm going to sleep with Anego."
"But… but… you can't! I bought Otae-san eggs from the super market, if you know what I mean," stated Kondo with a small smirk. Everybody who knew about Otae's cooking froze and looked at the floor bitterly. Damn, the Gorilla must've thought this through! Everybody's lives are at risk!
Okay, Kagura thought to herself, so Anego option is out. I would rather be killed by a knife than some unknown substance. Who else can I…
"Shinpachi! Can I sleep with you tonight?"
"Eh?" Shinpachi looked up at the ceiling thoughtfully, "I think I will sleep with my sister tonight, Kagura-chan. As you can see, I'm already used to her poisoning… cooking. Besides, it is dangerous here with a loose Gorilla."
"EHHH!" Kondo yelled painfully and shielded his eyes when he saw Shinpachi's glasses glinted brilliantly. Crap, I totally forgot that Shinpachi-kun has developed a resistance cell to the dark matter!
"How about you then, Gin-chan? Please! Health me! We've always sleep together at the Yorozuya, right?"
Gintoki looked at the Yato girl who is now desperately clinging to his legs with pity. He was about to say yes when he looked up and saw the look everyone was giving him.
Hijikata: Pedophile…
Shinpachi: Gin-san… don't tell me…
Kondo: Yorozuya, I know that single guys this age tend to be lonely, but…
Abuto: …BE ASHAMED.
Kamui: Kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill, kill…
Okita: Die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die, die…
"…Sorry, Kagura. I can't save you. Please give up on Gin-chan and find someone else!"
"But… Gin-chan!" Kagura screamed and reached out her hand when Gintoki burst into a dramatic run and dashed out of the meeting room with sparkling tears of shame and guilt running down his face. The room went quiet once the silver haired samurai had exited.
"I will sleep alone."
"We don't have that much luxury around here. The place is packed with injured men everywhere. Megane will be sleeping with his sister. Kondo-san will… well, he'll probably stalk the girl all night, so he'll be sleeping on the ceiling. I will have to share a room with Yamazaki. Abuto-san, sorry to say but you might have to share the room with the damn perm. You have either Sougo or your brother." Said Hijikata. Kagura felt like killing someone at that very moment.
"I don't mind sleeping with China and her brother. Her stinky dog and Danna's strawberry puddings can have the other room." Okita said dead-panned. Kagura screamed.
"What are you saying, Sadist? Are you out of your freakin mind?"
Then she saw that look in his eyes. The look of pure sadistic nature. This guy will do anything to make me suffer, even if it means staking his own life?!
"Great idea, Sougo! We can even save room for Sama…Saja… Sadahari-kun too!"
"Are you serious, Gorilla?! I'm not safe in there. My life will be hanging between the thread in that room with those two monsters!"
"Wrong, Kagura-chan. You will be the safest person alive in there. On your left is your strong, reliable older brother. On your right is a policeman who upholds his duty above anything else. I see no reasons to fear."
"My older brother is a psychopath and the policeman you mentioned is a twisted sadist who loves to torture girls! I don't even know if I will come out of that room the same in the morning. I could turn into an M!"
"Now, no more arguments, China." Okita stood up lazily and pulled her along with him. His eyes were sparkling with excitement. This could take my mind out of killing Hijikata-san for a while.
"Well then, see you tomorrow, Earthlings and Abuto." Kamui waved with a smile and followed Okita and Kagura into the hall way. Kagura was yelling and swearing like a
truck driver while Kamui simply carried his umbrella with a scary smile. Okita smirked at his awesomeness.
He would do anything to be with his sister, Mitsuba, again. He loved her and cherished her more than anyone. That's why he couldn't understand the conflict between China and her China older brother. Why would anyone hate their sibling, unless that sibling is Hijikata?
Once they've arrived at Okita's room, the prince of Sadist let go of the girl in his arm and tossed her a blue futon.
"I call the one beside the door." he said and picked up his own futon then yawned tiredly. Kagura growled angrily when she turned and saw Kamui walking towards the corner beside the window with his futon. This means that she is stuck in the middle.
Kamui undo his braid quietly with his eyes glued tightly at Kagura's and Okita's movements. His sister released her buns and the Shinsengumi guy was popping his buttons. Both of them look as relaxed as they could be, as if this isn't their first time spending the night together.
No way, thought Kamui as he nodded to himself, Kagura is only 15 and the guy is 19, the same age as me. There is no way they would… but what if… eh? Is it possible? Nah… nope. I don't think so… probably not. Because, like, I was the one who raised her up and stuff… but then the perverted silver haired samurai was also the one who looked after her at such critical age. Besides, this Shinsengumi guy wants to rape her! Ah, shit! I wanna kill him, but I can't!
"This takes me back to that night, eh, China?" Okita finally called out as he brushed his teeth in the washroom. He was referring to the night when they were captured by the Joui group with that girl, Kirie. Kamui stopped moving and smiled at them as calmly as he could. What night is he talking about?
"Ah, you are right. Damn you for speaking of something so dirty (referring to the poo) at such a touching moment. It was such a turn off."
EH! Wait, what dirty talk?! What turn off?!
"Aw, come on. At least I didn't actually do it (poo), right? You were the one who was a turn off for suddenly stopping like that (when she was running and got shot). We could've made it through (escaping) if it weren't for you." Said Okita who had just finished changing into his light green pajama. Kagura sneered and walked into the washroom after Okita came out.
HUH!? You`re kidding me! I am going to kill the samurai first, then the Shinsengumi guy, then…
Kagura walked out with a yawned and grabbed her blanket. She looks too tired to even argue about the rooming or who was turn off any longer. She looked at Kamui who was sitting with a frozen smile then nodded to the washroom with a small grunt.
"…It isn't busy anymore."
"Oh… okay. Thanks." Kamui mumbled and got up. He washed his face, brushed his teeth and changed his clothes into a pajama he had with him in his backpack. I will make whoever polluted my sister`s innocent pay. How shall I do it? Should I kill them with a knife or umbrella or…
The list went on forever.
Kamui turned off the light and returned to the room, only to find darkness and the sound of Kagura and Okita breathing and swearing at each other sleepily. He shut the door and lay down on his own futon, oblivious to the fact that both Kagura and Okita are just faking the relaxation they`ve put up until now. The truth is, they were so aware of being killed, they couldn`t do anything but pretend to be casual to each other.
That night, none of them could sleep.
Kagura couldn`t sleep because she was sure that either Kamui or Okita or both are going to jump her. They are going to kill her and put her in a stuffy body bag. But she was too tired to stay up all night with her soldier face, so she drew eyes over her eye lids and try to sleep. Her sleep was disturbed every time she heard any sound. This is one hellish night for Kagura.
Okita couldn`t sleep because even though her was strong, he`s still in the same room with two mood swinging Yatos. They could easily break his neck once he lets his guard down, especially the older one who seems like he was smiling all the time, but always glare at him with murderous intents. His sword felt uncomfortable under his futon, too. This is one hellish night for Okita Sougo.
Kamui couldn`t sleep for quite different reasons. His rage was boiling once he thought about the night Okita and Kagura had spent together. It is not easy to sleep while you are angry, trust me. Also, every time Okita shifted in his futon, Kamui was ready to jump on the boy. One wrong movement which was made closer to Kagura might`ve resulted a massive battle between Kamui and Okita. The bloodlust inside Kamui was stronger than ever. This is one hellish night for Kamui.
They are never going to last for three weeks in this kind of situation. No way.
