Disclaimer: I own nothing of the characters.
A/N: None of my fics are beta'd, just thought I'd let you know, so if there are any typos or spelling errors, please forgive me. I do try my best but even the best writer is fallible. I also know very little about the Hollywood Presbyterian Medical Centre past what I have read on their website. So I'm pretty much inventing the inside of the hospital here! This story was originally in the Xander/Spike section but I moved it over here as I will take it to Spuffy eventually, it's just focusing on the Spander friendship to start off with.
Decisions
Xander didn't ring Giles. He knew he should have, knew the Watcher would be less than impressed with him charging ahead in this situation. But he couldn't bring himself to dial even the international code for England. He'd stared at that phone forever before making his decision. Whatever had happened here, it had happened for a reason. Xander was here, and he'd found Spike. It wasn't a coincidence. This was his mission.
His first step was going to visit the ex-vampire at the hospital. See if he could find out anymore. On one hand, he was hoping that Spike was still unconscious, or if he was awake, unable to remember anything. It was hard to keep up pretences if the patient told everyone he was lying. But then, if he did remember…it'd make the job of finding out what happened to him a lot easier.
Things didn't usually take the easy path with Xander Harris.
Thankfully, the harder things were always made that little bit simpler by the presence of Willow Rosenburg. She was sat in the car next to him, thumbing through some magical tome, looking for a reason for this occurrence. Xander didn't care what she found, he only cared that she was here to go through this with him. His life saver, ever since they were little kids. And today was no different from fifteen years ago. If this was a comic book, she'd be a super hero in a dashing cape and mask.
As it was, she was a super powerful witch. With some of the darkest bags under her eyes he'd seen since he looked in the mirror this morning. They were both sleep deprived but anxious to find out what in the hell was going on.
He pulled the car into the hospital parking lot and found a space quickly. As the engine jittered to a stop he looked over at his best friend.
'Do you think they'll mind you coming in with me today? He was pretty messed up and I don't know if he'll respond to me alone. Might take a woman's touch?' He asked, and Willow looked up from the book, her mouth set in a thin line as she shut the volume and placed it in her bag.
'It depends, Xan. You told them he was your family, not mine. If he's in ICU, it's unlikely they'll let non-family in.' It wasn't the answer he was hoping for, but he replied with a grunt and climbed out of the vehicle, waiting for Willow to exit before he locked it. They walked into the hospital in silence, his mind racing with the questions of how this had occurred. He could only hope Spike was awake and willing to talk.
They reached the admissions desk and asked to find William Harris. The receptionist smiled politely and pointed them towards the intensive care unit. Which probably meant he was going about this alone. Sending the unimaginative guy in to make up a history for someone who had a very bloody past behind him. He sighed heavily. This sucked. The red head beside him took his hand and squeezed it in reassurance as they headed for the elevator and went up to the fourth floor. The hospital was quiet as they left the ER level, which was typical of an inner city hospital. As the doors opened on fourth, the overwhelming smell of ammonia assaulted Xander's nostrils. He hated the smell of hospitals, the starkness of white and grey walls. He didn't hate them as much as a certain Slayer, but he'd spent more than his fair share in these places. As if on cue, his eye socket began to itch underneath his patch and he frowned. He knew how horrible it was to be in this place, ergo he'd suck it up for the sake of the guy he hated.
That made perfect sense.
The ICU admin desk was staffed by a portly lady, who in the process of stuffing an oversized bagel into her mouth. Salad cream dribbled out of the side and down her chin in a manner than made Xander feel even more sick than he did before. Willow grimaced and cleared her throat. The large woman wiped her mouth on the back of her sleeve, placed the bagel on the plate as if it were made of delicate crystal and then turned to them, smiling a fake smile which showed rows of chemically white teeth. Her chins wobbled as she tossed her head. 'Can I help you?'
'We're here to see William Harris.' Xander said gruffly. This woman reminded him of his Cousin Carol. Falsely pleasant and happy with a big pile of doughnuts. She bent her head for a second and tapped away on the keyboard attached to her computer monitor.
'Ah, yes. He's down the hall and to the left. Room 6-4. Doctor Johnson is in with him at the moment, he got moved here about three hours ago. Are you family?'
'His brother.' Xander replied and the large lady looked at Willow expectantly.
'I'm a friend.' She said brightly. The woman's brow shifted in displeasure and she smiled again, the falseness of it making her appear even uglier.
'You'll have to wait in the waiting room I'm afraid.' She motioned to a door to their right, with the words "Waiting Room" emblazoned across the front, and Xander's heart sunk. He really didn't want to face this alone. Willow looked at him hopelessly and stroked his arm in reassurance.
'You'll be okay, Xand. I'll be right out here if you need anything okay?' She moved past him, throwing the admin woman a dirty look, but she'd already returned to her bagel with no interest in either of them anymore. Xander waited until Willow had entered the waiting room and then turned around, looking towards the ceiling and sighing loudly. The fat woman made an annoyed clicking noise, as if his inner turmoil was ruining her breakfast, and he took that as a cue to leave.
He counted the doors as he headed towards room 6-4. There didn't seem to be a specific numerical system here, at least, not one he understood, so he followed it closely, not wanting to get lost in a seeming maze of corridors. At last he spotted 6-3, and then 6-4. The door was open, and two white coated doctors and one blue scrubbed lady were in there. Spike was sat up, his eyes open. He was alert, even though the breathing tube was still firmly in place over his face and, Xander guess, down his throat too. Xander cleared his throat and knocked on the door gently, gaining the attention of the four occupants. He looked specifically at Spike, but saw no recognition.
'Ah, Mr Harris I presume. Dr Caldwell briefed me that you would be by. I'm Dr Johnson.' One of the doctors smiled at him, and offered a hand. 'I'm glad you are here. We were just about to extubate your brother.' He noticed the blank look on Xander's face and grinned slightly. 'We're going to take the tube out of his throat so he can breathe on his own. His progress overnight has been astounding, the wound is healing very nicely, we should have him on a regular ward before this evening. I wasn't expecting this level of recovery so quickly.' He turned back to his colleagues and said something that Xander could neither pronounce or understand. Then Dr Johnson turned his attention to Spike and smiled reassuringly.
'William, we are going to remove this tube. Can you take a deep breath and then exhale as I remove it?' He asked and Spike nodded in response. The doctor pulled the tape from the sides of the mask, and removed the external parts before taking a firm grasp of the tube. 'Take a breath.' He waited for Spike to breath in. 'And…release.' As Spike exhaled, Dr Johnson pulled the tube from his throat, resulting in Spike gagging and choking as his throat was finally cleared of obstruction. He took a few deep ragged breaths and then looked up at the people standing over him.
'Where am I?' He rasped, looking around the room in confusion. Dr Johnson motioned to the other two medical personal, who left, presumably because they were done in the room and Xander watched as they shut the door and gave the three remaining men some privacy. Dr Johnson reached over and picked up a cup of ice chips and passed them to Spike, who took them and stared at them for a moment. 'Where am I?' He repeated. Xander noted that his accent remained, although not as rough as he remembered.
'You were in an accident, William. Do you remember anything?'
Spike stared at the ice chips some more. 'I…fire. I remember fire. And it hurt…but nothing else. Is that my name? William?' He asked, looking to either man for confirmation. Dr Johnson smiled and motioned towards Xander.
'Your name is William Harris. This man is your brother, Xander Harris. He found you after he received a call that a man matching his missing brother's description was brought here.'
'You still haven't told me where "here" is.' Spike looked a bit peeved off. Xander couldn't blame him. Not knowing anything about yourself much be pretty frustrating. He moved round to the other side of the bed. The doctor began to explain what had happened so far.
'This is The Hollywood Presbyterian Medical Centre. You were brought in couple of days ago in a severe condition, which deteriorated rapidly. You underwent surgery yesterday for damage to your internal organs but you seem to be healing exceptionally well. You haven't shown any sign of a head wound, so we cannot explain your memory loss. However, once you are suitably recovered, we'll make arrangement to move you over to Gateways; they have a mental health specialist centre over there that will be more helpful to you.'
'I'm not crazy.' Spike said, with something akin to a pout on his face. 'Just…don't know who I am is all.'
'And they have amnesia specialists over there. As it appears you do not recall anything about the incident which brought you here.'
'Where did they find him?' Xander piped up suddenly, realising that he didn't know. 'No one told me anything except that he was in an alley and nearly dead.' The doctor shrugged.
'I'm afraid I don't know. The police will probably wish to speak to him at some point.' He looked at his watch and replaced Spike's chart on the end of the bed, smiling at the two men. 'I have other patients to see to. If you need anything, Betty on the admin desk will help you out. I'll be back in a couple of hours to check on your progress, William, and we'll discuss a transfer over to Gateways then.' He nodded and then left the room, leaving them in silence.
It took a few moments for Spike to look at Xander funny and purse his lips. 'So we're brothers.' Xander nodded. 'You don't sound British. I obviously am.'
Xander cleared his throat. 'We have different moms.' Remember the story, remember the story. 'Our dad left your mom in England and got with mine. He took off again soon after I was born. I didn't know anything about you until about seven years ago. We didn't really get on but…we sorta got on better last year. Then you disappeared.' Not too far from the truth I suppose.
'So your name is Xander and I'm William.' Spike sighed and looked back down at the cup of ice chips, which was rapidly melting in his hands.
'You prefer to be called Spike.' Xander said, scratching the back of his hand in an idle manner. Spike smirked.
'I'm not surprised.' Silence befell them again until Spike, who apparently even without his memory couldn't shut up for five minutes, grew more inquisitive. 'How did you lose your eye?'
'Crazy guy attacked me and poked it out with his thumb.' Xander stated matter-of-factly.
'Gruesome.' Spike made a face and then put the ice chips on the bedside table. 'So…how old am I? Can you tell me anything else about me? Might jog my memory.'
'You're 28.' That's a random number for ya. 'You used to bleach your hair but I'm guessing you haven't been able to do that much since you…disappeared.' Disappeared, burned to death in the crater of my hometown….tomarto, tomayto. 'You used to have this girlfriend, real morbid type. I dunno what happened to her, except you broke up. You like punk music, and you always used to wear this leather trenchcoat. And you smoked.' Xander thought real hard. He was trying to be careful about what he said and did not want to outright lie anymore than he had to. He wished Willow was here. 'Willow…she's a friend of mine and of yours, sort of. She's outside. She wanted to see you but they wouldn't let her in cause she's not family.'
'Oh. Okay.' Spike muttered, glancing towards the door.
'I'm sorry. I'm not much help. I guess…I didn't know what I was supposed to tell you. I don't know where you've been the last year. You weren't really an open book kinda guy.' Xander offered a lop sided grin and then remembered something else. 'You really like Jack Daniels. Or any type of booze I believe.' He hesitated. 'Before you disappeared…there was girl. My other friend. Buffy.' He waited for a reaction. Spike stared at him blankly.
'Yeah? What about her?'
Xander sighed. 'You guys were close. Real close.'
'Does she know I'm here?' Spike asked, but the tone in his voice expressed that he was only saying what he thought he was supposed to.
'No. The only person who knows other than me is Willow. Oh, and Faith.' He stopped. 'We weren't sure what to do. Cause we don't know what happened to you. And because you don't remember…you might find some things we do pretty weird.'
Spike nodded. 'Okay. I get that.' He sighed. 'So, am I going to have to go to this Gateways place? Or can we weasel me out of that? Have a feeling I won't enjoy being poked and prodded by mental types.' Xander smiled at the sandy haired man on the bed and nodded.
'I'm sure we can find a way.'
Willow looked up as Xander opened the door to the waiting room and smiled softly at her. He'd been gone an hour or so and had finally excused himself to use the bathroom when the nurse came in to check Spike's vitals. He took a seat opposite Willow and ran a hand over his face. She put down the book she had been reading and Xander caught sight of the title before she did.
'Memory spells?' He asked and Willow shrugged.
'I'm looking into everything. Be helpful if I could talk to him.' She said, looking towards the door and Betty behind it, who had been scoffing an éclair the last time Willow had poked her head out.
'Might be in some luck on that front. He's awake and coherent. Doesn't know what happened to him or where he's been the last year. I told him what I could without sounding like a crazy person. The doctor said he was healing really quickly, so I'm guessing there's a lot more going on here than we thought.' He scratched at his eye patch and the witch smiled. 'I'm not gonna leave him too long. He's kinda…no, he's a lot different. I mean, he's Spike but, not. It's very confusing. But the doctors talking about moving him over to Gateways.'
'The mental health centre?' Willow frowned. 'There was no head injury right?' Xander shook his head in confirmation. 'Then whatever is going on is most likely mystical. I mean, he's come back from the dead. I think that's our department, don't you?'
'Yeah, I thought you'd agree. I told him we'd try and get him discharged if the doctor said his injuries were healing okay. He doesn't want to go to Gateways. I think he's feeling how Buffy always used too in these places.'
'Have you called her?' Willow asked quietly, changing the subject. Xander looked down at his left shoe, not wanting to get into this subject but knowing if he looked up, his best friend would be wearing her resolve face. Her voice floated to him as he inspected the toe of his tan shoe. 'You need to tell her at some point. We're going to have to say something to Giles, he has more books than I do.'
'I know. I just don't know how to approach the subject. I ignored two texts from her this morning. She's going to know something is wrong if I don't reply soon but I don't know how to tell her Spike is alive. She was so…broken…Will, how…?' He trailed off and Willow moved over to sit beside him, leaning her head on his shoulder.
'We'll figure it out, Xan. Somehow. We always do right?'
A/N: Hope you all enjoyed it. I may treat you to another one to go with this one. Lemme know what you think.
