A/N: hey hey hey! What's up people? Don't answer that it is a rhetorical question. So sorry for not posting this week I have been super busy I hope you can forgive um let's See let's See what else… I guess nothing really thank all of you for reviewing I really didn't think anyone was so you can imagine how giddy I was, seriously my brother slapped me in the face because he thought I was high or something. Idiot.

Disclaimer: was Hermione ever really a main character? Did we get to see her home life and her parents or were they just useless Muggles. Then I do not own this story. Is Bella a meek, pasty white girl? (No offense to other pasty white people.) Then I do not own that story... Thank you for your time

Chapter three: Burn Baby Burn, Bitch Slap

Hermione/Isabella

"Thank you Robert, in other news a giant forest fire consumed a three million dollar mansion just outside of Forks, Washington district. The police have no clue as to what started the fire but nonetheless three percent of the forest has been burned to the ground. Wildlife protection has been on the job none stop since last Friday the beginning of spring break turn in at ten for Colby's interview with the man who built a corn powered car engine will it work or fail evolution in technology? This has been Channel Seven; Seattle News."

Hermione turned off the TV with a satisfying "hmm" it was Sunday the official end to spring break. In two days she had turned her new found host's image from a weak, zombified heartbroken girl into a lively energizing young women who still smelled strongly of sea water. Charlie was surprisingly unsurprised, it may have been from the notice me not charm she placed on him but regardless he was happy. She thought that burning down the Cullen's mansion was a small price to pay for giving him something to do in his work. I mean sitting on one's ass all day playing cards wasn't beneficial for anyone's health.

Yes the white glassed mansion was burned to a crisp; it took little effort to set it on fire, a click of her fingers really. And damn that fire spread faster than lavender brown legs on Quidditch night. And also like lavender, Hermione just couldn't quite find it in her heart to let any of the safes, clothes, cars and other valuables burn. It would be a pity to let all that go to waste. Who would? Cullen's paid money for that griffin dung, and this girl was not gonna waste.

"Bella!" Charlie called; probably going fishing again if he goes anymore we'll never get the smell out.

"Yeah?" She hollered back

"I'm leaving! I'll be back Wednesday!" ah, a long visit, oh how gratifying it was to be left alone, All these mischievous thoughts waiting to be let out.

"Okay Dad! See ya later eat well!"

"Aha okay bells be good." He warned, Ha! When was I not good? Compared to other people I was a-a saint! When I heard his car grumble to life and speed away (hypocritical cop) I jumped out of bed, since the fire I haven't correctly taken inventory of the stuff I found.

"Accio beaded bag!" oh how I loved wandless magic, it was almost as good as pudding. But nothing, I mean nothing could beat pudding; it was a god given gift to us mere mortals.

"Now let's see..." I mumbled to myself flicking my fingers, softly the ingenious lyrics of "I shot the sheriff" played, who didn't love Bob Marley. I turned my bag (a new one; apparently jumping through bodies and universes you didn't get to keep your shit) shrunken Mercedes and a red and black jeep fell out along with five original Van Gogh paintings, Carlisle's medical/personal journals(I was curious!) along with the rest of the families strange and in Rosalie and Emmett's case promiscuous thoughts. Who knew jasper lovedCourage the Cowardly dog? I know I didn't that's for sure. Rosalie's clothes and shoes to be honest the chit had a lot, I really wanted Alice's stuff like really wanted but I could only use her skirts she is such a tiny thing. But I was able to use her hair, face and body products. I had no clue in hell why a vampire needed bloody face moisturizer but mine now bitches.

Japers kick –Arse fighting technique journals fell out next, along with Emmett's top of the art game systems and comic books, let me tell you I was very tempted to put his pornography in Charlie's drawer, but… I have very sensitive hearing and risking his safety for a silencing charm wasn't worth it. After that shudder inducing thought, Edwards's piano and music system came out last, with a few safes.

The great thing about non magical people was that they had no complicated lock systems, no curses or defensive dragon's just plain ole locks. It was heaven. I magically expanded, my room casting a fidelus on it. I will be the one and only person stepping forth in this place, you can believe that, plus when I took Snapes journals I finished his equation for being your own secret keeper basically all spells are casted with intent; you could transfigure your face by saying oh let's say smile! But thinking of a way to change your features, you can also cast the Unforgivables by saying Reparo. The perks of being a genius were unlimited.

Now my room was roughly the size of our kitchen and living room combined. More like a Malfoy master's suit point is... it was big. Thank Merlin for Molly weasley trying to turn me into a proper housewife; if it wasn't for her I would not know a damn thing about architecture spells and housing development charms. In the far right corner I put a bar, always wanted one in the common room Gred and Forge were all for it. Damn McGonagall, always putting me down. This is why I wanted to start "Down with man!" strikes the Wizarding War and World needed hippies! That government was corrupt man, corrupt.

Four bay windows, two on the east wall and on the south, the walls were painted a soft green, like spring. He he, I rhymed there, Merlin was I a boss or not.

The window panes and floor boards a cherry mahogany. The ceiling was an illusion of the night sky, stars floated down to the floor and exploded in silvery sparks. I charmed it to change from night and day, in the left corner by the south bay windows. I put a genie bed, Parvati showed me pictures of her room, and I really liked the idea of a floating carpet bed, drowning in colorful silks and satin.

The floor was charmed to a bright vibrant green grass by the north corner, by the bar it was warm sand with a little pool. On the west wall I transfigured various sheets of paper into twenty foot yellow frames. Into those I pulled out some memories of Luna, Papa Lovegood, and I. some of the boys and me, and my Yule ball pictures which to say –not to blow my own red cap or anything- were so damn beautiful. The pictures moved but didn't talk, I did not need my less than perfect sanity ruined by past ghost, and they were good to look at but not talk to.

Looking around, my room needed more color, so transfigured a couple of blankets into nets and dyed them neon, blue, green, purple, pink, and yellow. The mesh floated around the walls sticking to the pale green surface. The overall effect was, amazing. The west corner would be my dance/training/ arse-kicking fighting moves area. So a reflective air bubble went around that area. That way I can see what I'm doing and not mess up my beautiful walls. Underneath the sand where now two empty "basement doors" the one on the right will be my potions lab/study, which will be fully operated when I scorer the town and possibly the state for some spell and ritual books. A good thing about any universe was that everyone believed in magical things. The other door will lead to my closet, and yes I really needed a whole room to store all of the clothes I've recently… acquired and then those I will buy. Also the safes and any other information such as bank account numbers extra credit cards all that jazz will be there also.

luna

"luna!"molly shouted. i wish she wouldn't merlin knows how temperamental all this stuff down here is.i have been hiding in their basement for two days eating nothing but instant pudding and suckleberries a very nutritious meal.

"Luna! love come out!" screamed a horse neville, i really wish he'd stop that. ever since we broke up well we weren't really in a relationship more of a cuddle-buddy snuggle -body companionship. the reason i have been down here is that soon i would be with mione , and then once i'm there a chain reaction should start basically we will be the start of a new world order. a new school and teaching program for every magical being whether they be witches and wizards, mutants and supernatural hunters, ghosts or werewolves, faeries and for that to happen we would need information. so i, being the lovely vague person that i portray told daddy that i would be gone for .. well, ever and he gave me the lovegood and greengrass family journals and inheritance.

i started gathering every other wizarding and non human families journals, special rituals and whatnot. starting with the potters than i went to the blacks-a nasty piece of work worse than breeding thestrals-the bones, browns, flannigans, dumbledore's, the Xaviers Institute etc. etc. tomorrow i leave for america ,over hundred wizarding families there, then brazil, africa,china, spain, russia, bulgaria.i had exactly one year to get as much information as possible before the portal closes. if mama's calculations are correct i should arrive four months after hermione has arrived.

" Luna ! please come out! we have pudding!" damn them all to the firey pits of Tartarus . why oh why does everyone bust out the pudding card? bloody arse-holes! sighing i put down my enchanted backpack-a silken alpaca fur sack from Austria- and unlocked the basement door. one of the plethora of motto's in mine and Hermione's books is "never pass and opportunity for pudding"

Billy

"hey bill! you want another beer!" Charlie hollered over the blaring TV, the Nixes game was on over twenty people were cramped in my tiny ass house. it was sweaty and hot, but we sure as hell we're havin some fun.

" yeah! give me a minute!"i heard his muffled 'yeah okay' and wheeled myself over to the phone. i have been very suspicious ever since bella left jake the other night. the girl had been mad dogging (no pun intended) him for a straight two weeks than she figures out are secret-which is still doubted by herself i mean Charlie's girl isn't exactly the brightest of the box- not only that but we are still havin some issues with those damn bloodsuckers.

"Hello ?Billy? what's up" croaked Sam,

"hey here Sam, i need someone to check on Charlie's girl, things have been a little ..weird lately"

" No problem Billy i'll have- you know what never mind i'll check it out for myself"

"thanks Sam say hi to Emily for me"

"will do bye."

Hermione/Isa

school, there is a million different definitions. diverse and unique, once upon a time -before Luna- the thing consumed me. i had overbearing parents who strived for the very best and severe consequences came if not presented with the best. Hogwarts was not a relief for me. picked on by people who looked down on the claw in the lions den. it didn't matter if i brought in more house points than anyone. i was a freak, a bossy nosey freak. no one never really tried to get to know me, the real me. they only used me for finding out their problems and pointing out the obvious.

i was a living codex who opened up to anyone with a bloody smile. but i haven't been that girl since papa came.

school, is a place for social gatherings and playing who's in control. today the new Bella will rule this world i know it. i can feel it. It was seven-forty, i was dressed in a skin tight flower dress, a vintage Louis vuitton brown leather biker jacket and brown pumps. i look good.my chestnut curls swirling around in a beautiful flowy halo effect. since Charlie was gone i didn't have to worry about checking in with him or a curfew for the next couple of days.

slabbing on some chapstick -watermelon!- i grabbed my bag and apparated down stairs. i knew why the twins loved doing it so much. it was so bloody fun, i was tempted to just pop over to school but i foresee a troubling thing happening so i might need my car, well Edwards car but really.. it was unrecognizable. Seriously it was, i turned his plain silver Aston into a bright cherry pink and added Hogwarts crest to the black leather seats.

soon i was speeding out of the driveway; in gold letters HBIC flashed away in the distance.

when I arrived-after breaking over twenty different traffic laws- it was a gratifying feeling as everyone watched me as i pulled in. i could hear whispers of "is that a new girl" and "who the hell is that" boys were already checking me out-which was a big thrup (A/N:thurp is like a throw up and a burp) in my opinion- and the pretty stuck up bints were eying me with the green envy. was it bad that i completely embraced this feeling, i mean shite i feel like i can define gravity, no one was ever going to bring me down , ya know?

i made my "get out of the car" sequence as dramatic as possible, lets just say, minds were blown.

" hey there girl ." Taylor, no Tyler thats it! said to me " are you new to this earth baby, because all I see is light." oh. my. bloody. hell. this was going in my "worst pickup lines ever" which was filled with a majority of McLaggen and Ronald... and some malfoy and harry. but that was only one time he was trying one out for practice and needed a "dummy."

" um yeah Taylor.-"

"Tyler, how did ya know my name sweets?"

"Yeah okay Tyson, listen its me Isabella and I'm sorry but were you dropped on your head as a baby?"

"Bella!" he shouted mouth agape, whispers started to life.

"Hmm, yeah ISAbella, I'm sorry that when your mother dropped you it gave mental retardation, but don't worry our school is accepting to those who are... different." I drawled

DING!

"Oh golly Gee whiz! There goes the bell!, bye Tristan! And close your mouth sweetie you might catch flies." I floated away with a parting pat on the head. Today was going to be fun.

I Take that back, today was a bore...i mean sure i was looked at, and gaped and and drooled at. but longing jealous looks only go so far. that is why right now on my way to this pathetic dining hall opps "lunch room" i was going to start something and was gonna be fun.

there was a reason a i've dodging Jessica and Lauren, i just wish Tyler had taken to dodging me but oh well you can't resists this deliciousness. i grabbed a turkey salad from the line, its wilting leaves looked oddly... peaceful, like the rain ooh! i mentally squealed i lovethe rain.

i walked gracefully -well as gracefully as i could in this body, balance exercises tomorrow- ignoring mikes wounded " you got hotter and didn't call me" face he'll be dealt with later.

" Omg! bella! i just love , love your hair!" Jessica squealed

" oh thank you jasmine these are my natural curls i just dyed my hair." her smile faded while mine got bigger, angela failing to hid a snicker scooted over to make room for me,

" unm its Jessica, jess, you know my name!" she squeaked outraged.. i can see why people were laughing she looked like a red frog swelling up.

"yeah well you know my name jentri its Isabella." poor ange just couldn't keep it in soon everyone was laughing even the people eavesdropping. "oh mi gawd" Lauren whispered to who i didn't know, were there nargles here? i smirked. " when did Bella turn into such a bitch"

i turned towards her " what was that" i asked my face emotionless a tiny smile taunting my mouth.

" i-nothing." she muttered

" no.. it wasn't Leslie, say what you just said." i demanded, the cafeteria was quiet now, my fist clenched together in anticipation

" i didn't say anything gawd." she whined, i hate whiners, they were bloody worse than bella bitch and all her baby coo's.

"now you listen here" i stood up and walked over to her ,the table created a nice easy access path to her,

"You stupid fucking cunt! i heard what you said i just thought you be less of a frigid bitch and man up to it." I hissed, eyes blaring, i could feel the atmosphere change, getting darker, fearful my hair cackled, ha! And I wasn't even mad."Sorry ange, i know how you hate cursing" she waved me off, I knew she liked drama just as much as the next crazed freak.

"you called me a bitch: well guess what you got a bitch , give me one reason why I shouldn't backhand your ass across town."

I warned I was ready one little hit and then I would leave her the bruise and erase everyone's memory.

"I-I, I dont- I dont..." she stuttered, a foul odor came from her, I along with everyone else looked down.

Well shit, Lauren shat herself... wicked!

A/N: okay I know alpaca's don't come from Austria but whatever! thank you all for the reviews! see ya next time.. well not really but ah! You know what I mean : P