Chapter 4
Fear
Thumpthumpthump
thumpthump
...
... ... ...
It comes when the sun goes down
Where the shadows grow and move
In the cold, away from the light
It shifts and coils, prepared to strike
It resides in my chest
In the nightmares of my dreams
Its presence is sharp
Painful like a cut, cold as ice it seems
It appears out of nowhere, when the unexpected happens
It's touch burns inside me, my heart to race inside
It blossoms in the darkest hours, consumes me when I try to hide
It is fear, I suppose
Come to haunt me till I die
...
-Jane Doe
Two weeks later.
She didn't know what she was doing; not consciously anyways. Opening her eyes, Sakura once again peered down at the small text, re-reading the third paragraph for what felt like the umpteenth time that night. It didn't make sense; though she supposed nothing ever did the first time one tries something complicated.
If the Immune system is truly trainable, then she should be able to alter the cells to submit to foreign substances- In fact, by training the immune system, she should be able to stop the white blood cells from attacking ones own body. Trying again, Sakura zeroed in on one of her T cells, willing it to move past the antigen in her body.
She could feel herself losing control as more T cells joined in on the attack.
"Just a little more... come on..." she chanted stubbornly. She always had the hardest time when it came to a mob of white blood cells. Her precision was off- she had to spread her chakra out evenly between hundreds of thousands of cells so that the balance was perfect.
At the sound of a sharp knock, Sakura's chakra spiked, her attention temporarily drawn away from her cells to the front door. Her influence of the cells dimmed, faltered once, twice-
Cursing loudly, Sakura threw herself back over on her bed, groaning in frustration. Another loud knock echoed over the hallways, reminding her that she had a visitor. Swallowing her fury, Sakura rolled over in reluctance, keeping a hand on the wall as she made her way clumsily through the narrow hallway.
At the sound of a third knock, Sakura flung her hands up in annoyance, almost tripping down the stairs as she shouted, "I'm coming! I'm coming!"
Flinging the door open, Sakura halted, eyes pinned on the figure in front of her. In the dim moonlight, a glint of white caught her eyes. Her hues stayed trained on the towering silhouette as she gracelessly flipped on a light switch. The man remained still as light flooded around him, evaporating any doubt of his identity.
"Kakashi?" She whispered, shocked. Her eyes flickered briefly towards a cut along his upper brow before latching on again to his lone eye poking out from under his mask.
The silver-haired anbu captain gave a hesitant nod. His posture was sunken, eyes dimmed. "May I come in?"
A small wriggle caught her attention, and Sakura glanced down to a tiny bundle wrapped in his Kakashi's large arms, held securely against his chest. Peering forward, Sakura could see a tiny fist resting against what appeared to be the side of a very small human-like face. Is that..Is that a baby?
"It an emergency." He prodded gently, seeing traces of uncertainty reappear on her face.
Sakura, feeling slightly alarmed, took a step back, allowing room for Kakashi to come in.
"Of course."
Kakashi paused as he began to pass Sakura. Looking down, the anbu-captain relinquished his hold on the tiny infant as Sakura snaked her arms under the tiny bundle, gently cradling the infant in her arms as she gave a small kiss to its forehead. She stared down at the small babe, smiling at her reflection in the child's dark-blue eyes. Sakura bunched her eyebrows as a fresh new wave washed over her. Inhaling again, the scent became more recognizable. Smoke.
"Where did you-" Sakura stopped, shaking her head. "I mean, what were you-"
"I found her."
"Where?" She demanded appalled.
Kakashi gave a large sigh, running a hand through his silver mane. Thrusting his hands inside his pockets, Kakashi stared at the crooning infant, now staring blankly at Sakura's swinging pink locks.
"Sakura." Kakashi waited for her to look at him before going on, catching her emerald eyes and holding it in his own. "We need to talk."
Sakura felt her muscles stiffen at the tone in his voice. It was hollow, crisp; lacking even the smallest bit of warmth and humor that once presided in his light voice. Her eyes narrowed.
"What happ- OW!"
A sharp tug on her head pulled her attention to the infant cradled in her arms. The child, armed with a fistful of her pink hair, shrieked in laughter as she shook her trophy side to side, kicking her tiny feet in the air. Kakashi too, gave a smirk at the bubbling high pitch squeal.
"Here. This should be everything."
Glancing down, Sakura eyed the navy bag on the wooden floor.
"Oh no. No, no, no- I can't keep her, I'm barely home an-"
"I've already talked to Tsunade."
Sakura gaped at him. Unbelievable. This was unbelievable.
"It's just for a little while," He prodded gently. "Besides, I have something more important for you."
Seriousness suddenly settled over the two of them as they stared at each other. Blinking helplessly down at the crooning child, a soft wave of warmth washed over her as she watched the child's drooping eyes close with finality. With a sigh of defeat, Sakura gestured for Kakashi to take the infant from her. "I believe my mother put away my old crib in the storage room. I'll go and get it."
Sakura, after much frustration, finally found the wooden crib placed low over a stack of papers and books. Gently, so as not to wake the sleeping infant, Sakura placed the small babe on her back, throwing a soft, blue blanket over her form.
She gave a deep sigh, running a hand through her pink locks as she stared at the sleeping child. Everything was feeling suddenly chaotic- as if a whirlwind just decided to drop out of nowhere, destroying everything and leaving her mind in a disorganized blur. "What am I doing..." she murmured, talking to no one in particular.
A memory flashed behind her eyelids, illuminating the darkness in her head.
She saw herself next to Kiba, her head in his lap. She could see herself laughing, her shoulders racking up and down as she flipped onto her back, her eyes gazing up at the sky. Kiba's hand ran delicately through the top of her head, brushing aside a stray strand of hair. She closed her eyes.
"I've always wanted kids of my own," he murmured, looking away.
She opened her eyes, sitting up.
She heard Kiba ask, "What's wrong?"
She began to stand up, already moving away. "Nothing," she whispered, not turning around. "It's nothing."
Flipping the light switch off in her room, Sakura padded down the hallway towards the staircase where Kakashi waited patiently for her. She slowed her pace as she neared the bottom, brushing a stray strand of hair away from her eyes.
"So," Sakura began, turning to take a seat across from her ex-sensei, "What happened?"
Kakashi closed his eyes, running a hand over his face and chin. "Tragedy happened." He murmured softly, almost to himself. A strained silence followed his reply.
Sakura blinked at him, beckoning for him to go on.
Kakashi leaned forward, resting his elbows atop his kneecaps in a way Sakura would have found casual on any normal day. But looking at him now, she could see the rigidness behind the movement. It was almost painful, reminding her of an elderly person with arthritis. "We were on our way back from a previous mission. There was a village." Kakashi opened his eyes, dropping his voice. "Or, I should say there used to be a village..." Kakashi paused, catching Sakura's eyes. "The entire village was wiped out- the people were all dead, their bodies set ablaze."
Inside her head, images flashed behind her head like snapshots of a movie reeled together. She could see the people screaming; see the flames as they burned away memories and treasures from long ago. "But how?" Sakura breathed, shocked, now imagining the cries of people in her head. A shiver crawled up her spine. "Was there an attack? A raid?"
"No. Nothing like that." He interjected.
"Then what?" She demanded.
"An illness." He concluded, face expressionless. Yet the weight of his gaze felt eternal as they rested on her. Kakashi stopped, reaching into his back pocket to pull out a vile of blood, sealed securely with a sealing jutsu. The binding was incredible- black markings zigzagged over the glass tube, literally making it impossible to shatter.
"Potent enough," he continued, with new vigor, "to wipe out hundreds of lives in a matter of weeks." He finished with a low voice, as if something was heavy on his mind. "We were told to stay away. Panic, it would seem, was everywhere. There's something you must understand," he added in a more serious tone. When people begin to panic, they lose all sense of themselves. Their judgment becomes clouded, and their ethics and morals even more so."
Sakura stared at him, her face having paled since the beginning of their conversation.
A deep sigh. "People panicked."
"So the neighboring villagers... they just- they just..."
Kakashi nodded, not needing her to finish the sentence for him. "Yes," he replied solemnly. "They arranged the death of the village- and the death of the people within, if only to protect themselves."
She felt queasy. More images began to burst behind her eyelids. Every time she blinked, a new image would form in her head, always more gruesome than the last. In an attempt to save herself from imagining the destruction, Sakura reached out to take the vile, cradling it gently in her hand.
"The blood came from one of its victims. " He said lazily, appearing to have snapped out of his thoughts at her touch.
Sakura stared at it thoughtfully, thinking dimly that one wrong move on her part, and the whole village could be wiped out by the species contained within. The sealing jutsu did little to reassure her as she absently tightened her grip on the cool glass tube stained black. As if on cue, a shrill panic shot within her as she realized exactly what she was holding; what she held tightly in her sweaty palm. Shooting a look at Kakashi, Sakura cried, "Are you mad? Why would you bring this here! Into the village! If this were to get out..." Sakura let the sentence hang delicately in the air, unable to finish; unable to voice her fear.
Kakashi was quiet as he stared at her. An eerie calmness seemed to overtake him as he sat up even more in his chair. "Because," he began absently, a line of tension drawn between his shoulder blades, "I don't believe the disease, virus, or whatever it may be sprung there by accident."
A rush of uneasiness came over her as she glanced back down at the blood vile with new apprehension. "You can't expect everything to be an attack on the village. New diseases and such sprout up all the time." She replied, not unkindly, but with a hint of dry humor.
"Yes," he agreed, thoughtfully. "But not ones like this. A group of medics in another camp examined the villager's blood before setting fire to it." Reaching into the side of his vest, he produced two folded pieces of papers stamped with a red seal that read 'CLASSIFIED" on top in bright crimson letters. Tentatively, Sakura plucked them from his open hand, an icy chill running through her veins. Whether from fear or the chill of the house, she couldn't say.
Unfolding the pieces of parchment, Sakura hungrily ran her eyes over the letterings and figures. Small scratch markings littered the thin paper, reminding Sakura of Naruto's messy and disorganized notes. At first sight, nothing seemed abnormal. Five graphs, clearly hand-drawn, dominated the top of the first parchment, representing the five samples that they were willing to get a hold of.
She frowned. CBC was normal, blood culture showed no signs of a viral infection, even the white blood cells were in perfect shape. She stared at the piece of paper for a few more second before turning her attention to the second piece clutched tightly in her hand. She was met with a similar line graph stretched horizontally across the creamy parchment. Under it, a set of percentages outlined the bottom edge of the graph, whereas on top were listed a number of chemical names, all she recognized to be found in blood. Plasma, which most of the blood consisted of, Albumin, Globulin, Mineral cations and antions, the list felt endless. Looking at the zigzag lines above, she felt her frown deepen.
"There's nothing wrong," she stated blankly, confused. "There's nothing wrong with the blood samples. They show that the person..." she paused, her eyes widening significantly, "was perfectly healthy..." Her voice trailed off into a whisper. She glanced sharply at Kakashi.
His face remained expressionless, but she thought she saw a slight twitch to his temple. "Exactly," he grumbled, entwining his fingers once again.
She blinked at him, not knowing what to say, except for the obvious. "Kakashi, you realize that that's not possible. It must have been a mist-"
"No mistake," he interrupted, voice firm. It was the voice she remembered her sensei having, and despite the odd circumstances, she found it oddly comforting. "The evidence that the disease existed is too strong to overlook. And yet," he said, dark curiosity thick in his voice, "the tests show that nothing of the sort ever existed."
Like the virus went into self destruct, she thought to herself, appalled. Then aloud, she said, "I see why you say it's not like other illnesses."
Kakashi nodded grimly. "If this is what I suspect it may be," he finished, a shadow passing over his features, "our village may have more to worry about than previously suspected."
A tense silence filled the empty space between the two. Sakura felt goose bumps rise on her skin like the scales of a snake. Still, a question continued to bubble in her head. She bit her lip vaguely, wondering whether to voice it or not. Finally, she decided to go ahead and ask.
"What does Tsunade think of all this?"
A crinkle of a smile etched its way under his mask. "Nothing like this has ever occurred in the history of the lands. She doesn't know what to make of it." A pause. "She believes that it may be a virus mutated by toxic waste, or other such chemicals."
Another pause followed suit. Sakura asked, voice quiet, "And you? What do you think?"
Kakashi stayed silent, his eyes hidden in the dim shadows. In all that Sakura has seen him, she has never seen her teacher more tired, other than the day he found out the truth about the village elders and their monstrosities. He looked old; tired and weather worn. A sharp contrast than the Kakashi she's known him to be growing up. She was about to dismissive her question, worried that it was something her sensei wasn't willing to discuss, when Kakashi said, "I can't say."
For reasons unknown to her, a strong urge came over her: the urge to simply brush the whole conversation away saying, "This whole thing is silly. We've nothing to worry about." But she didn't, simply because she knew she would be lying to herself. And despite the painful want she had, to simply cast the grain of fear away, she could not bring herself to ignore the seriousness of what she was hearing.
In an attempt to turn the subject around, Sakura asked, "How did you get this?" Her hands tilted up, gesturing to the vile of blood still held tightly within her hands.
Kakashi's eyes were deep in thought. Then, with a deep grave tone, one Sakura has never quite heard before, Kakashi replied, "Some things are better left unknown."
A flash of indignation flashed within her, but was quickly smothered out by the thought of what Kakashi must have went through. She didn't need to hear the details, she thought with a pang of guilt. "And what of the baby?" she prodded gently, still not understanding how she came into his possession.
His eyes brightened a bit, clearly having forgotten about the sleeping child upstairs. "Her parents are dead. The illness killed them."
Sakura opened her mouth to speak, a sharp stab of alarm almost causing her to drop the vile onto the dark, oaken floor, but Kakashi raised a hand to forestall her, saying, "She was not in the village at the time; her biological parents sent her away when people first began getting ill. She has had numerous tests done on her. If she had the illness, she would have shown signs of it by now, especially being the infant she is. I can assure you, she is harmless. I would not have brought her here otherwise."
Sakura swallowed, closing her mouth. What Kakashi said was true: everyone in the other village perished. If the child had contracted the fatal virus, she would have perished among them, whether she was in her home village or not. "So where was she sent to?" she inquired.
"The other neighboring villages. Only, nobody was willing to take care of her, fearing for their own lives. They wanted to kill her, even after the numerous test results."
"So you brought her here," she finished for him. "To save her life."
He nodded, shifting himself to stand up. Sakura got up with him. "It's getting late," he pointed out, notifying Sakura that it was time for him to go.
"Yea," she agreed quietly, gripping the front door knob in her hands, "Thanks for talking to me." Kakashi nodded, already three steps out the door. Sakura was about to shut the door when she noticed the blood vile still in her hands. "Wait!" she shouted, rushing after him. Kakashi paused, turning around. "The blood, you forgot it."
"No," he shook his head, "I didn't. That's for you to keep."
"And what am I supposed to do with it?" She inquired, remembering her patients at the Hospital.
A shadow passed over the moon, hiding Kakashi's figure in the temporary darkness. But even in the inky blackness, a grim stiffness could be seen in his silhouette. "Get a head start," he replied, pulling out a small scroll for her to take.
"Here," he said, a hint of embarrassment etching into his voice as he held the paper out for her to take. "Almost forgot."
She took it in her hands, fingers tracing the coiled bottom of the parchment, eyeing the small red ribbon. When she looked up again, Kakashi was gone. Leaning against the now closed door, Sakura unfurled the ribbon, recognizing Shizune's neat slanted handwriting.
Sakura-
Meet me in Lab 5 tomorrow. You and I have been assigned
to this unknown illness. Don't worry about your patients,
they are being cared for.
-Shizune
A sigh escaped her lips as she slipped the thin piece of parchment into her pocket. Here we go again, she thought with a scowl. Yet again, she was being stripped of her hospital duties. Only this time, it was for vital research. She didn't really mind, she decided, a spark of anticipation blossoming within her as she headed up stairs towards her room, grabbing the navy bag as she passed it.
A sharp wail sounded at the end of the hallway. Sakura jumped at the sound, a painful jolt rushing through her as she rushed to the top of the stairwell. After a few seconds, she realized the wailing belonged to the baby. With a push, the door flew open, and she rushed to the crib.
"Shhhh, shh," she crooned, scooping the infant and holding it to her chest. "Don't cry. You're okay."
The infant, pacified by Sakura's touch, blinked her blue eyes at the pink haired medic, her tears rapidly fading on her pink cheeks. Sakura looked down at her, smiling.
The same memory of her and Kiba flashed once in her mind, bringing forth a sharp ache in her chest. She blinked, staring down at the pink babe.
"I guess you'll have to do," she whispered, her smile diminishing as she placed a small kiss on the infants forehead, settling on the edge of her bed. She began to rock back and forth gently, drawing the baby's eyes close. A thought struck her head.
"Nobody told me your name...," she murmured, half to herself, half to the nameless child. The infant stirred in her arms, her arms rising up before drifting under her chin, a small bubble forming at the tips of her thin lips.
"How does Hana sound?" she asked, knowing the child couldn't hear her. Absently, she placed the child back into the crib before shrugging into her snug tank top and shorts, climbing into bed.
"Hana," she repeated silently. "Beautiful blossom...It fits." With that final thought, Sakura closed her eyes, darkness swooping over her like a dark tidal wave, drawing her closer into unconsciousness.
(A.N) First off- So sorry for the extremely late update! Time seems to have disappeared from under me, and with work and summer stuff- I feel like this must be the busiest month of the year for me! So just bear with me- It's not my fault (: Well... sort of is, but hey.
Sooo... things ARE getting a bit chaotic... what could possibly happen next? *Grins wickidly*
So this chapter sparked another idea for a story that I would like to do- and with that in my mind, I am more than determined to get this story rolling! Hope the info wasn't over kill x_x
Feel free to post your comments about the ongoing events in the story (:
Much love: Colani :D
