I did a part two to show Masamune's side during all this! This part has unrequited komasa, heavy chikadate, but overall it's YukiMasa Hope you enjoy

Beta: As always the lovely: Fantasia Green

EDIT: this story has been face lifted. Again, I would like to give a big thanks to XD1411 for pointing out errors that were missed!

"I'm in love with you!" Masamune had said with confidence at the time. He wasn't a coward. He knew his own feelings, and he knew Kojuro felt the same. The blush on the other mans face made it obvious.

"Masamune-sama…" Kojuro cleared his throat, as if nervous. "We should talk about this."

"What is there to talk about?" Masamune was confused as Kojuro made him sit down.

"You're not in love."

Masamune blinked. "Yes I am." He wasn't sure why Kojuro was doubting him. Maybe he was nervous because of his sudden declaration. "I mean it!"

"You're young. You're just confused."

"I'm not." Masamune was suddenly filled with dread.

"Masamune-sama." Kojuro was talking in a calm low voice, as if he were placating a child. He said that Masamune didn't love him, that he was just attached to Kojuro and was just confused about his feelings. He said it was because Kojuro has been with him and taken care of him for so long, and that it was normal to have a crush. After being treated cruelly by his mother, it was no wonder that he emotionally attached himself to the one person who was always around him and took care of him.

"It's just misplaced affection."

"It's not!" Masamune said firmly. "I really…"

"You'll grow out of it." Kojuro ruffled his hair. "Years later you'll look back at this and feel silly."

Silly? Masamune could cry. He was crying. Kojuro gave him a tissue rubbing between Masamune's shoulder blades in small circle. He let Masamune lean against him, and very hesitantly embraced him in an awkward one arm hug.

It was the first time in a while that Masamune had cried himself to sleep. He didn't want to get out of bed the next day when he found himself tucked away in his room. Kojuro must have brought him upstairs.

He didn't move for three days. Kojuro would bring him food, but he wouldn't eat. On the fourth day Kojuro said he had to get up and at least shower and eat, and if he was going to stay in his room, he should at least clean it.

He managed to go downstairs and interact with his other retainers. He didn't say anything about Kojuro blatantly avoiding him. At first there was a tension in the house from the mood bouncing off of the two, but by the third week it had calmed down. Masamune was in better spirits. He figured Kojuro just wasn't convinced because of his age. When he was 18 he would try again and get the desired response. He was very sure of this.

In the meantime he still had school to focus on. He was still a second year at this point. He had class work to worry about. During his weeks of sulking, schoolwork was the only thing that Kojuro wouldn't let him miss out on.

Around the end of the year, he convinced Kojuro to let him go to one of Tokugawa's parties. It was mixture of different schools that were attending. Masamune rightfully established himself as the life of the party, even amongst the people who normally held that title at their own schools.

This is how they met Chosokabe. At first they hung out because of the irony of the eye patches. Everyone called attention to how they were each missing the opposite eye, but within their first meeting Chosokabe had given Masamune his number and the request to call him.

He did, and while Kojuro hadn't ever met the pirate, he encourage the relationship. Masamune wasn't dumb. He knew Kojuro was hoping his interests would fall elsewhere, and he knew what Chosokabe wanted from him. His friends had told him as much. It was okay, because he didn't plan on doing anything with him.

"I don't get why you still hang out with him." Yukimura sighed. They were currently at the Takeda residence, upon Yukimura's request. He often got lonely when his friend, Sasuke, wasn't around. Sasuke hadn't been around much lately, needless to say Masamune was over a lot.

"He's not that bad." Masamune defended. "He's pretty cool."

"Yeah, but…I don't think he's with you because…"

"He's nice enough."

"I never expected you of all people to settle."

"Maybe we're both using each other." Masamune said simply, before pretending to be focused on his math homework.

It was three months in when Chosokabe finally got Masamune in bed. At first it was nothing more than a bit of making out and heavy petting, and then the next thing he knew he was being laid out and stripped. He didn't fight it. He was shy about his inexperience, but he was also curious.

Chosokabe had done this before. He easily made a mess of Masamune. It was embarrassing but he had cum twice that night. Once when he was being fingered and the second time when Chosokabe was inside of him. He could vividly remember the way he clung and wrapped around the other man. He cried out from almost every form of contact, his body had been so sensitive.

Disappointingly so, he felt no passion. He wondered if it would have been different if it had been with Kojuro. All the same it left him ashamed and empty. When he got home he couldn't bring himself to look any of his retainers in the eye. It happened a few times after that before Chosokabe thought it was a good idea to call it quits. Masamune agreed.

"You'll find someone else." Kojuro had said as Masamune sulked.

"I want you." Masamune had mumbled, but the way Kojuro stiffened makes him think he might had heard. Masamune wasn't upset about the break up. He knew that what they had wouldn't last. He was upset because he knew until he got over Kojuro he wasn't going to be able to get along with anyone else, and he knew he wasn't going to get over Kojuro.

Things went back to normal. Masamune was spending less time with Yukimura, as the tiger cub had stopped calling him over. Then again, Yukimura had been acting weird the month before. Maybe he was still pissed about the Chosokabe thing, but that had been months ago. Then again, with the way he had been acting this might just be one of those friend break ups. No words are needed, they just stop talking.

He'd never felt so displaced in his life.

"Wanna fuck?" Chosokabe sent him a message from time to time, and Masamune would accept. It was only a few moments of feeling wanted but he was grateful for it. Chosokabe was at least a gentleman, he let him stay the night, didn't hog the blankets, let him shower, and made breakfast.

A few of his other retainers had asked him what was wrong, but he gave them no reply. Eventually Kojuro came around and asked if he was feeling well before he casually mentioned that Masamune hadn't been himself lately.

"It's nothing that can be remedied quickly." Masamune had sighed not caring to go back to the topic.

Kojuro sighed as well. For the first time he wasn't sure what to do to fix things. He figured he would just keep a close eye on him for the time being. It was hard to manage things because he was also Masamune's caretaker, and was the overseer of the Date's affair in Masamune's stead. He never thought that he had to keep a close watch on Masamune, but he was wrong.

Masamune was in a very fragile state, and needed all of his attention. However, he didn't want to get to close and lead the poor boy on. He was in a tough spot.

"You haven't mentioned Yukimura lately."

"We haven't talked in months."

"Why don't you call him?"

"Because the last time we made plans, he canceled with some fake illness, and the time before he didn't pick up the phone or answer my text. It's whatever." Masamune shrugged but the hurt was easy for Kojuro to see.

"I'm sure he's just going through something that…"

"He's not willing to explain." Masamune finished for him.

"There's no one else?" Kojuro asked.

"Everyone is busy." Masamune said. It was no secret that even though Masamune drew a lot of people to him, he had very few people he considered to be true friends. And recently those numbers were dropping.

"You can't just lay around all day."

"What else am I supposed to do?"

"Go for a walk, practice your kendo, martial arts, clean your room?"

Masamune just looked at him with a kind of "yeah right" look on his face, but it didn't have it's same teasing smile like it normally did.

"What's wrong." Kojuro sat next to him. "This isn't just about what happened between us."

"Does it matter?"

"Masamune-sama…"

"Later, just not now."

"Alright." Kojuro left his room with the door open as if to keep an eye on him. It gave him peace of mind to be able to walk by and see what Masamune was doing instead of giving him time to cover whatever he was doing.

Masamune's phone vibrated. He sighed and picked it up.

"Wanna fuck?"

"I'm tired man."

"Food?"

"I'm broke."

"I'll pay." The last one came with a smiley face. Masamune rolled his eye, but got up all the same, with new found energy. Kojuro was glad to see Masamune up on his feet again, but feared he would go right back to his sadden state when he got back.

Chosokabe did take Masamune out to eat and then, somewhere along the way, they ended up back at his place and his bed. Masamune didn't object. He decided it wouldn't hurt to go with the flow.

Things went like that for a while. Chosokabe never seemed to tire from meeting him like this. He always acted as if there was the first time he was unwrapping some sort of precious gem, and Masamune was always taken aback by that small moment. At the end of the day they were still fuck buddies. He learned to be okay with it.

He entered his last year of high school finding the first semester easier despite the heavy work load. The next semester was supposed to be lighter, but at least this gave him something to do. Yukimura came around once in a while. He was still the energetic mess he always was. He seemed a little off but he explained that Sasuke was a third year and had graduated and was even more scarce than he was last year.

"We barely see each other anymore, he always running out to do something."

"It's probably school related. I'm sure his schedule will clear up around break."

"Yeah you're right."

Speaking of graduating, Chosokabe had also graduated last year and was now attending college. It was more than thirty minutes away, but sometimes Masamune would get talked into visiting for the weekend. The other people on the floor didn't mind his presence, but he was only allowed over when Chosokabe's roommate, Mori, wasn't around. He'd only met the other man once, and they had gotten along for the most part, but Chosokabe said that Mori didn't like him.

People seemed to know what it meant when he was around because they never stuck around for more than an hour before everyone came up with some excuse to leave and Chosokabe would whisk him off to bed.

"So…" Chosokabe started to speak once he was sure Masamune was about to leave. The dragon was sitting up and going through his phone. Kojuro had text him a few times asking where he was, and if he didn't answer soon the man would worry.

"What?"

"Things with me and Mori are getting pretty serious."

Masamune was quiet and he waited for Chosokabe to continue, but he didn't. It was clear what he was saying and there wasn't much of a point elaborating.

"I told Kojuro I wouldn't be back until the morning." Masamune said.

"And?"

"One last time?" He knew that he sounded clingy and needy, but at the same time he couldn't help it. He was losing his last foot hold. Chosokabe smiled at him warmly, but the pity in his eyes was obvious. All the same, he pulled Masamune back down next to him.

~.~.~.~.~

Yukimura had dropped contact for the past three months now. Chosokabe didn't even pretend that he had been interested in Masamune for anything other than sex. He hadn't heard from him since that night. The situation with Kojuro stayed the same.

The last part was the most regrettable. He was starting to think that his confession was the worst thing he'd even done. He wasn't able to go back to Kojuro, or that familiar comfort he could always expect from him. Those strong secure arms that would wrap around him whenever he was distressed. He missed that, he longed for that.

"He stays up in his room the whole weekend. We bring him food but when we go to pick up the tray he hadn't eaten any of it." One of his retainers explained.

"He's not well, but he won't let us help him." Kojuro sighed. Talking would do no good. At this point he wasn't sure if Masamune even actually was listening when he talked. He still made a point to let Masamune know that they were all here for him.

The last time he had said it was at dinner when everyone sat down to eat, and he had somehow managed to get Masamune to come downstairs. The moment those words were spoken Masamune and started to shake, tears flowing from his eyes as he excuse himself.

"Masamune-sama…" Kojuro tried to stop him, and he could hear the calls of the other retainers at his back. It didn't stop him. He locked himself in his room again, crying himself to sleep. He didn't even know why he was crying this time. Maybe it was just from everything being bottled up inside him for the past year, or he actually had been touched by what Kojuro said, or both.

Kojuro hung his head in defeat as he heard Masamune's pained sobs. This had been the second time this year that he made him cry.

Masamune somehow managed to bring himself from his room, and knocked on Kojuro's doors. When he entered he could see the uneasiness in his retainer's face. He asked if he could stay in his room if he laid out his own futon.

"Kojuro…"

"Yeah."

"Can I ask you something?" He was crawling closer to sleep next to Kojuro like he used to.

"What's wrong?"

"Why?"

"Why what?"

"You never gave me a reason."

"What?" Kojuro turned to be on his back and Masamune was hovering over him.

"You said that I wasn't in love and that I was just attached to you. You never said you didn't like me. You never gave me a reason." Masamune's lip quivered the same way his voice was.

"Masamune." Kojuro said.

"Please, just tell me why." Masamune pleaded, "If you really don't like me like that then you can just tell me, right?"

Kojuro hugged him, letting Masamune cry on his chest. He let him stay next to him the rest of the night. He kept his arm around him to put him at ease.

Masamune made another recovery, and refused to talk about what had happened the next day. He continued like everything was fine.

"I'm so tired." He could be heard mumbling from time to time, and it was becoming more frequent.

"Tired of what?" Kojuro finally asked.

"Everything." Came a simple reply.

"Have you tried calling Yukimura?"

"I already told you how that was going." Masamune sighed.

"No parties? It's your last year in high school, you should be out with your friends. This may be your last chance to see each other."

"I know."

"You should call."

"There's no point if they don't want to." At this point Masamune's phone rang and Yukimura's name popped up in the caller ID. Kojuro gave him an "I told you so" smirk.

It turned out that Yukimura needed help for Sasuke and his friend. The tiger made him promise not to say he told him, and Masamune agreed.

Once he had all the details about the situation he was able to make the necessary plans to take care of it. The Date had a heavy influence over the police force, and even though Masamune wasn't of age to take over, he could still pull a few strings.

"You owe me." He said at the end and Sasuke complained that he'd promised the his services were free.

"I had to get down on my knees and beg the Toyotomi for help." He explained. In the end he never really planned on calling on that favor. He'd helped a boy get out of an abusive home, and into one he knew would properly protect and raise him. He was feeling a lot better than he had in the past few weeks.

"I think I like you." Yukimura had blurted out when he took Masamune out to eat as a thank you. It was nothing more than a cheap burger joint, but it was the thought that counts.

"You think?"

"Well…"

"You've known me long enough to know I won't take you seriously unless you come at me seriously."

Yukimura looked defeated and didn't speak anymore.

"Love confessions are always hard. Don't beat yourself up over it." Masamune said remembering how long it took for him to talk to Kojuro.

"Have you ever…"

"Once, and I was completely rejected."

"Who was it?"

"Kojuro." He could feel a smile gently playing at his lips after speaking his name.

"Y-your retainer?"

"Yeah. He's been the only constant in my life, the only one who has been by my side despite everything. He took care of me, loved me. No matter what I did he was always there. He was all I've known for years." He recited bitterly. "Or at least that's what he told me the reason for what I was feeling. He told me that it was just misplaced affection and that my feelings would fade."

"Was it?"

"Was it what?"

"Misplaced affection."

"No." He said simply. However, he didn't want to explain what he was still feeling to Yukimura after he had just confessed. It didn't matter because Yukimura had changed the subject to something that had happened at school.

They fell back into their familiarity of battles and banter. He couldn't help but grin. Nothing had changed between them. Yukimura was too good, and too sweet of a person for Masamune to consider being with half-hearted.

He knew he couldn't completely dedicate himself to him. He couldn't use him the same way he used Chosokabe, and he couldn't stand to lose him the same way he did Kojuro. There was a fundamental difference between their relationship. Messing around with each other without serious intention could lead to irreparable damage. He thought too much of Yukimura to take that chance.

Fin