Terrible Parents

"...Mom?" I said softly, after over a minute of complete silence, "Your eggs are burning," I watched her carefully, as she took a deep breath.

"Is...is that a sword?" She asked.

Kisame grinned. "Yes m'am."

"And...are you..?" Kisame's smile only grew, as he gave a short nod. I held my breath as my mom seemed to except this with a faint nod, turning towards the stove. She flipped the egg, and began getting plates ready for both herself, my sister, and me.

After a few moments, I had to ask. "Well?"

"Well what?" she said, not turned to look at us.

"..can they stay..?" She took a deep breath, paused in her actions, and glanced over her shoulder at us, then turned her attention back on breakfast.

"No."

"No?" I spluttered.

"No." She said with an air of finality.

"But-But-!" I began. She whirled on me.

"'No' means no." She said firmly, grabbing a pan for bacon, "You can't just- just spring this on me out of the blue!" She began placing pieces of the meat in the pan, then turned to fetch four more plates. "They stay for breakfast, and then they have to go home. I mean it."

"But they can't." I insisted, advancing on her.

"What do you mean they 'can't'?" She asked, eyes narrowed as she tried to work around me.

"We're stuck here, m'am," Kakuzu started, before my mother whirled on him.

'"This has nothing to do with you!" She snapped before turning to me. "What does he mean 'stuck'? They can walk out anytime!"

"They aren't from here Mom- c'mon- there's only four!"

She ignored me, naturally. "Where are they from, then?" She asked.

"...A different world…" I said, fully expecting what came next.

"Did you summon them?" She hissed. "Annalena- I swear if they are by any means demonic-"

"No! Nono!" I said, trying to speak over her furious ranting as she viciously flipped the bacon. "They were cats when they got here- I made a contract with them to turn them back to their original forms-"

"What do you mean you made a contract? I am so sick of the magic in this family! You and your Grandmother are always up to trouble! You're gonna be burned one of these days! How are we supposed to feed them-"

"We'll find a way! Mom there's only four! We can work something out-"

"Where are they going to sleep? What will your father say? And your sister? Are they dangerous-"

"ENOUGH" Kakuzu roared, fists clenched. The others, were looking mildly amused. Breathing heavily, he finally snapped out, "Would you two shut up. You're giving me a migraine." For once, my mother was silent.

"Money will not be an object," Konan spoke, wisely taking advantage. "Once we find means of obtaining it, we have full intention of paying our share of what we spend. As for sleeping arrangements, none of us are accustomed to uncommon beds- we are more than willing to take a floor. In the mean time- we shall help you and your family whenever necessary. I'm sure arrangements can be made and adjusted if needed." Her soft voice held great authority.

My mom regarded Konan with narrowed eyes. "Fine," she grumbled, "Let's eat and discuss. Like adults." She added, glaring at me. Setting food on plates, she turned to me. "Go wake your sister up."

"Isabelle!" I yelled. Mom frowned.

"Well I could've done that." She grouched. As she passed a row of cupboards, she turned on the radio, leading all of us into the dining area. She sat at the head of the table, waving her hand for the rest of us to follow. As we sat, she looked up at the ceiling. "She still not up?" She asked, placing a bite of egg in her mouth. "Musta been a late night, then."

"What time did she get home?" I wondered. My sister played in a band as the lead guitarist most Friday nights at a little club downtown. Sometimes, she didn't get home until well after four in the morning.

"We heard the door open at three- a girl came in?" Konan offered, neatly picking at her food.

"Yep, that would of been her." Mom concluded. "Was she carrying her guitar? Or was she on piano?"

"Guitar," Came a grumble from behind us. Isabelle stood in the kitchen, buttering her toast. Her hair, was short and dyed blonde and pink, shaved vaguely on the sides to bring it into a mohawk shape. Her green eyes were almost closed against the morning sun, and thick eye liner was still on her face from the night before. She hadn't seemed to notice the criminals in our midst, but they most definitely noticed her.

"Well goodmorning," Said Kisame around a mouthful of food. Isabelle whirled around, eyes widening at the sight of our unexpected guests. Her mouth opened and closed like a fish, as she took in the sight of four familiar faces.

"Oh...my god…" She said, dropping her toast. The food didn't go to waste- Toby quickly swallowed the treat.

"I'm getting pretty fucking sick of all this damn staring." Kakuzu grumbled, somehow managing to eat the majority of his food with his mask on. Sasori nodded in solemn agreement.

"Is- take a seat and close your mouth. Once your father gets home we're having a," She glanced at the Akatsuki, "...household discussion."

Isabelle took a seat next to Konan, picking at her food and occasionally looking up at her in awe. The rest of breakfast was an awkward silence- only to be interrupted by my father opening the door.

Now, out of both my parents, I most certainly did prefer my father. He was a very laid back man- with military short hair dusted grey and a scraggly mustache that always seemed to need a trim. He was tall, and firmly built, and was awfully quiet for his size. As he walked in, he paused at our strangely dressed guests for a second, and then carried on removing his shoes, and set his jacket on a chair. Unsurprisingly, he only gave a polite "Hello," Before kissing my mother's cheek and taking his place at the table. He arched a burly brow at me in amusement, lips twitching into a smile. "So," he said with a faint chuckle, "I'm guessing this was you?"

My mother gave him a glare as I nodded in weak amusement. "Don't encourage this," she grumbled half heartedly. Turning to me, she set her face in her most fierce version of 'mom-mood' and said, "I think we all deserve an explanation."

And so I told her, about finding the dirty box on the side of the road, about trying to figure out how to turn them-and send them- back, and how finally, Gran called and left me a spell in the Book. She frowned at this, but kept silent. Finally, Konan explained what happened on their side, keeping it even more vague than when she told me.

"So," Mom started, "Tell me why they can't just go stay at your Grandmothers- as she was so kind as to help you."

"They can't be more than nine miles away," I started.

"And Ma's an hour and a half away." Dad finished.

"So if they have to stay here, how on earth are we going to feed them?" Mom said, pointing at both Kisame and Kakuzu for emphasis.

"Well, Sasori doesn't eat, and Kakuzu doesn't eat all that much," Kisame said, pulling Sasori's untouched plate towards himself, "Konan-san here will only eat a normal amount, and as for me," he said with a grin, "I don't always eat as much as a horse."

Despite my Mothers grumpy appearance, she had to snort at Kisame's comment.

"I think," Dad started, "That we could definitely use a few more helping hands around the house." He smiled as my mother raised her eyebrow at him, and made a vague gesture around the house. "You've had construction plans for a while…"

She shook her head, "Fine," She grumbled, "But they're pulling their own weight." She looked to me, "But you are responsible for them. I mean it, one wrong move…"

"All right, all right," I said with a grin. "I can handle this. Totally." I looked at the criminal's, "Right guys?"

I received a grim silence for my troubles. Apparently they held just as much confidence in me as I did in my self. I swallowed nervously.

My mom merely shook her head as she collected dishes from our brunch. "I should hope so," she called from her way to the kitchen. "Your father and I are leaving for this weekend, he has his teachers meeting in Prince Rupert remember?" The dishes where placed in the sink with a clatter.

My father frowned. "I'm not sure I'm comfortable with leaving you and Isabelle with you guys…" He gave the akatsuki a suspicious look. This look was met with a great amount of indifference.

Isabelle scoffed, having finally recovered. "Believe me, we can handle it." She said, giving me a knowing look from across the table. I flinched, remembering the time we accidentally summoned a demon-overlord into my grandmothers garden last year, A fight a wasn't all that proud of. My grandmothers lavender plants were sacrificed in the battle- something she still isn't impressed about to this day.

My mother rolled her eyes. "You think I'd leave theme alone? Allan!" She scolded, "Of Course not! Patrick will check up on them," She gave me and Isabelle a firm look, "regularly."

Isabelle and I made eye-contact across the table. Uncle Patrick? Checking in on us? Regularly? Theirs as much chance of that then there is of hell freezing over. But what ever helped my mom sleep well at night….

My father relaxed. "Well that sorts that out!" He grinned, ruffling Isabelle's hair as he stood. "I"ll pack the car?" He called to my mother. She gave a nod, and before we knew it, Iz and I were alone.

In my house.

With four members of the Akatsuki.