It has merely been days since the fake Moriarty was caught and peace is restored in England.
Peace, being a relative term when it concerns Sherlock Holmes.
For him, fake Moriarty's demise was followed with demand by Molly Hooper to help her pack so she can go back to her flat.
She had agreed to stay at Baker Street until the danger had come to pass and now that it had, she, like everyone else had assumed she could just go back to her previous living arrangement.
No way in hell.
He nags and demands and throws tantrums and Molly finally relents.
She will stay with him, continue to be his flat mate because does she not know how much he hates changes and how much he has gotten used to her presence? Not to mention, she makes an adequate soundboard now that John is gone.
It's all very logical, the argument he provides to keep Molly with him but the reality is, he just wants her to stay.
"Guess what?" She says as she drops her bag on the table and flops down on the couch beside him.
Sherlock, who is busy shouting abuse at the TV, finally turns his attention to her and raises his eyebrow in question.
"He asked me out!" She tells him giddily, almost jumping up and down on the sofa in excitement.
Her declaration is followed Sherlock promptly turning his face away from her and staring back at the TV.
Molly frowns at his weird behavior, and patiently waits for him to say something.
"What did you say?" His voice is all very controlled and emotionless and Molly has no way of knowing that he is one step away from hurtling his remote at the TV and destroying anything he can in his general line of sight.
"I didn't answer him. I- I wanted to know what you thought of him first. So, tell me, is he a ex murderer or psychopath or- you know?" She looks hopeful, as if she wants him to say there was something wrong with her latest admirer.
He takes a deep breath, the temptation to lie growing stronger by the second but he grits out reluctantly, "He is fine. Completely normal."
He doesn't look at Molly but if he had, he would have noticed the way the smile falters from her face before she grins at him- this time forced. "Thank you! I will say yes to him then. Wha-"
She doesn't get to finish her line of enquiry though, for Sherlock Holmes had already risen and gone inside in the sanctity of his bedroom, slamming the door on the way.
"You know you could be more productive with your time than wasting it away sulking," Mary informs him in a matter of fact way, sixteen weeks after Molly and that Doctor named Mark began dating.
"I am not sulking." Sherlock knows he had been doing exactly that, but God help him if he admits this to Mary.
Mary sighs, places cupcakes she brought for him on the kitchen table, tries again," You could just tell her."
He waits until he hears the closing of the door before he whispers to the empty room. "There is nothing to tell."
And there isn't.
What will he tell Molly Hooper anyway? That he is madly in love with her, that he can't imagine living the rest of his life without her? That though he is a first class jerk and had behaved rudely with her from the first time he saw her, he had always been attracted to her?
It's all well and romantic in theory but when it really came down to it, he knows if he said those things to Molly now he would be nothing but a laughing stock.
She has moved on, it's clear from her behavior during the past couple of months. Now, any feeling he shows for her other than friendship will be completely unwanted and undesired.
She has grown out of her hero worship of him- just like he always knew she would- and saw him for the pathetic excuse of a human being he is. How could he hope that she would love him after that, why would she?
And then, Molly doesn't deserve for him to disrupt her carefully constructed life once again. He had already broken her engagement with Tom; he can't ruin things for her again.
Molly deserves a normal life, a normal house with normal children and a normal husband who will make her happy. Not a person like him, with all his baggage and 'sentiment is a chemical defect' crap.
And he won't stand in her way of happiness, even if it killed him.
He is formally introduced to Mark and he hates it.
There is truly nothing wrong with him. Nothing.
Sure he was married once but it is clearly the ex's fault that it resulted in a divorce- she cheated on him.
Other than that, Mark is a surgeon, thirty four year old, good looking, funny, nice and smart.
He is perfect for Molly.
Something Sherlock isn't and will never be.
He immerses himself in cases, resolutely avoids Molly as much as he can and avoids his own home.
She isn't there anymore, her things aren't there any more, she has moved in with Mark and what are left are her memories.
Her scent still haunts his nostrils; he hears the sound of her voices every time his despair leads him to reach out for his secret hidden stash only to back out at the last minute- because voice in his head tells him to not do it, that real Molly will be very angry if he does.
He doesn't.
He proposed.
-MH
Sherlock?
-MH
Are you busy?
-MH
Oh, okay then. I just wanted you to be the first one to know.
-MH
Congratulations, Molly Hooper. I hope you will be very happy. You deserve it.
-SH
At least try a new line! Anyway, I haven't said yes yet.
-MH
But you will, won't you?
-SH
How do you know?
-MH
He is perfect for you.
-SH
That is the last time she and Sherlock shares something personal, until the day of her wedding.
He ambushes her in his room, just before she is supposed to take her vows.
"Sherlock! You scared me," She says when she sees his reflection in the mirror.
He looks wonderful in his tuxedo and her tugs at the sight. She isn't supposed to look at him this way, not any more, certainly not after today.
It takes her a moment but she notices his state immediately and she is filled with concern for him. His hair is messy, there are bags under his eyes and the way he holds himself clearly indicates he is tired. He doesn't look he is attending a wedding; he looks like he is attending a funeral.
He looks sad.
"You look beautiful, Molly," His words are a whisper.
It's an honest compliment. Sherlock Holmes doesn't give honest compliments. His praise are always veiled in cutting remarks.
He takes a step towards her and then two and there he was, standing inches away from her.
"Are you okay?" She asks him, her eyes roving all over him and suddenly, she wonders if she made a mistake. Is she isn't around, who would take care of him? Who would look after him, who would he say I need you to?
She squashes the thought as fast as it came. She is deluding herself. Sherlock Holmes doesn't need her, he never did, he never will.
"I am fine. I am great." A beat. "Are you okay?"
She nods.
He takes in account her worried look and continues, "Really Molly, I am fine. Don't look like that," He offers her a small smile, shaking his head.
The stay in silence for some time before he speaks, his words a jumbled mess, "You will be a married women today. Amazing! I never thought- I mean, I did. I always knew married life would suit you, that you would make a great wife to someone some day. It's just; I never thought it would be this soon. I thought it would be when I am not around anymore-" He trails off, having clearly revealed more than he intended too.
"You could have asked me. You could have asked for more, should have asked for more. Why didn't you?" His voice cracks and Molly can't do anything but look at him as Sherlock Holmes comes undone in front of her. "You should have said let's get married Sherlock, let's have kids, let's have a normal life. You could have asked. I would have done anything if you had asked- I. I am sorry. That's not what I had intended to say when I came here, "He smiles melancholically, "It's too late, isn't it?"
"Sherlock," She takes a step towards him but he cuts her off.
"No, it's okay. I really am fine. I just came here to congratulate you."
Meena, unfortunately, chooses that moment to barge in. "Molly, It's time. You are ready, right?" She notices Sherlock but doesn't pay any heed to him, dragging Molly with her.
She keeps on stealing glances behind her to the man who had her back turned to him as she desperately wills the tear that sprang up to her eyes to not fall.
"Anyone has any objection to why these two should not be married?" The priest asks,"Then…"
Unfortunately he does not get to finish, for Molly Hooper chooses that moment to shout, "I do."
"No, you say that after-"The priest begins but Molly cuts him off with a shake of her head.
"No, I mean I object."
"What?" Mark shouts at the same time as the priest.
"I made a mistake. I made a terrible mistake."
"What are you talking about?"
"This is wrong. This is all wrong." She gestures her surroundings. "Don't you see? That's not how it's supposed to be. This is not how it's supposed to be."
Suddenly, understanding dawns on Mark. "It's Sherlock, isn't it?"
Molly grabs Mark's desperately, pleading him to understand. "I need to go to him. I have to talk with him. He needs to know."
"You have got to be kidding me! Really, Molly? On our wedding day? You need to talk with him now? After all this time? "
She pleads for him to understand. "I am sorry. I know what I am doing is wrong. I know it's not fair to you. But don't you see? I need to talk with him. I- There is something stuck between us, something left unfinished. I tried, we both did, to make it go away, but it's still there. It's always been there. Sherlock and I, we need to sort this out, put a rest to this."
"And what if it doesn't rest? What if it intensifies?" Mark looks resigned. Oh poor Mark, sweet Mark. He is an amazing guy, but he will never be Sherlock.
"Then don't you see? Then it will be wrong, staying with you will be wrong. For all of us! I need to go Mark. I need to finish what's between us."
Slowly, Mark extracts his hand from her, "I hope you will be very happy, Molly."
His words are the same as Sherlock and suddenly, Molly sees everything very clearly.
Mark loves her, truly does, just like Sherlock.
He is sprawled all over the couch when she enters Baker Street, clutching a pillow in his hands.
Her heart breaks when she sees it. Sherlock is clutching her pillow, all pink and Winnie the pooh drawn over it.
Briefly she wonders if he has regressed, finally given into temptation and taken the needle but she knows him better than that. He won't.
Instead, he has chosen to drown himself in alcohol it seems.
"Great! Now my imagination has come to taunt me," He mutters when he sees her, pouring himself another glass.
"I am really here, Sherlock," She says softly.
"No, you aren't."
"I am," She walks over and crouches down in front of him, fishing out the glass from his hand and setting it on the table.
Molly lets her hand rest on his cheek and watches as he flinches at the contact, before sitting upright and grasping her hand in his.
"You are here. You are really here," He says in wonder, his eyes taking over her every feature before resting on her left hand which was in his and noting the lack of a ring with relief.
"You- Why didn't you?"
She knows what he is asking.
She gets up and sits beside him. "It felt wrong." She notices the way he still, paying close attention to her every word. "I went out with him because I wanted to forget you. And then, when I did, I liked him. I truly did. All the guys I have dated till date were always a replacement of you. So, I dated someone completely different. Mark, fit the bill. He was different from you, he was better than you."
"Then?"
"Then you came and said all those words and I realised that I was wrong, again. Mark is better than you but I didn't want better, I just wanted you. I couldn't go through with it, even knowing all those words you said might have been a heat of the moment thing. I still couldn't. It just felt so wrong."
His voice is a low rumble," Then, what feels right?"
"You."
She is answered by being laid on the couch and under him, as he places sloppy kisses all over him, before finally setting on her lips.
She laughs and kisses him back.
"Stay," He pleads, in between kisses." For forever."
It's the best proposal she ever got. How could she refuse?
"I will."
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