Everything has meaning, even the small, colorful, and annoying insects that crawl on you as you lay in the tall, bright green grass on a cool summer night have meaning. Words that seem like nothing at the time of the conversation have meaning to them, no matter how small and insignificant you believe they are. Actions have more meaning than both of those things of course. Actions are part of our instincts and if someone has done wrong to you physically you could learn to forgive them for it, unless they knew what they were doing, then you stay far away from them and teach yourself that people can be scary and that no matter what, some people just can't change.
At this moment I could only take shaky breaths as I stared up at the nights sky, the grass tickling my bare arms and neck as the breeze moved slowly around me. The stars in the sky have meaning, every constellation and far away sun has meaning. The small specks of color in your eyes have meaning. When I think to myself that there is no way that I am useful on this piece of dirt floating in the middle of infinity, I just think that maybe I have an important meaning. Of course finding out what it is is always the hardest part of the journey. I raised my hand in the air, reaching for something that I knew wasn't there, but a boy could hope. A man, I'm a man. I frowned and tilted my head slightly as I noticed a star twinkle brightly at me and I wondered if maybe stars had soulmates like we mad.
I looked down at my arm where resting in the crook of my elbow was a mark that looked much like a tattoo due to the intricate designs and black color. The shape if the mark was an interesting one, no one I've ever seen has had one as big and dark as mine. Mine was a pitch black color, others were normally a light brown and very rarely did they have color, and was shaped much like the figure of a cat with a fish tail but it had no solid shape, it was full of strange symbols that I could only make out a few. There was my Zodiac sign, Sagittarius, and another one, a Virgo, but not much else I could tell in it, mostly swirls. Compared to others my symbol was special. Maxine's was just a small, rare blue butterfly on her ankle that she showed me one day when she noticed my own mark peaking from under where I normally roll my sleeves up. When she finally met up with Chloe and saw the butterfly on her upper thigh when they went swimming, Max said she never felt happier, knowing your best friend is your soulmate is the best thing that could have happened to her.
I wish I knew the feeling.
There was absolutely nothing stopping me from doing what I wanted at this time but I stopped myself, a sick feeling bubbling in the pit of my stomach as I felt another presence nearby. I took a disgusting sounding swallow, as laying flat on your back position is a difficult one to swallow in, and tried to stay still, hoping that maybe they wouldn't notice the invisible nerd boy who only ever had girls as friends, and none of them were interested into being upgraded to Girlfriend unless you shared the same mark as them, which was bullcrap. My parents didn't have the same mark and they still fell in love, had me and my younger brother, and are still together happily. Least I hope they are happy.
Sadly my prayers weren't answered as soon a figure stood above me and I couldn't stop the overflow of tears that began to come out of my eyes. All I wanted was to be alone and actually be invisible on my own terms for once in my life and yet this person had to come and ruin this beautiful moment that I was having for myself. All everyone ever does is ignore me or they torment me for being smarter than them on a daily basis and I couldn't help that I was quite smart and that I wanted a good job when I was older, even if I was thinking of going into becoming a director. I just wish everyday that I could get a scholarship to get to a college far from Arcadia Bay and away from the people who have only made my life hell in the small time I've been here.
The figure above me never even moved as I cried, just staring down at me and listening to my sobs of loneliness and despair until they sat down next to me and slouched over their knees, laying their chin on their knees and looking up at the night sky with me. All I wanted was for them to just leave me alone and let me look at the one thing that made me happy by myself.
My crying stopped after what felt like ages and I felt a hand grab mine in the dark, intertwining our fingers together as we both looked up at the stars, I couldn't help but wonder who exactly was sitting next to me, but the fear of it was too much and I just hoped with every fiber in my being that the person who had slightly rough, strong, yet shaky hands had a meaning to all of this and that it was true what I said to myself everyday. I looked down at our hands and noticed a tattoo on the back of theirs and I sucked in a breath, trying not to cry out and hug the mystery person as the tattoo that stuck out in their pale white skin was the same one that was in the crook of my elbow. I wonder if they noticed before sitting down with me.
I was still too scared to look up at their face, so I closed my eyes and sat up, laying my forehead on my knees and leaning towards them, I could hear them take a sharp breath and their hand tighten around mine as I climbed onto their lap, eyes still closed as I lifted my head and pressed my lips against their thin, slightly chapped ones that began to kiss me back slowly, keeping our hands intertwined as he wrapped his other arms around me to pull me closer.
I used my thumb and began to rub at their tattoo, loosening our hand hold and they shivered and pulled me closer, their hand that was around my waist now on my arm and rubbing at my tattoo. I felt a shock of relief flood my system as I realized that this is what it feels like to finally touch your soulmate and have love and adoration fill you up until it felt as if you were going to explode.
As I kissed him I could feel him crying as salty tears ran down his cheeks and intermingled with my own tears of happiness. I was still too scared to see whose lap I was on. I didn't know who I expected either, I wasn't expecting anyone really (Thinking this could all just be a dream broke my heart more than it should.) and whoever it might be would be a surprise. I just never knew it would be a guy whom I would be connected to and how, if I have gone to school with him, I never noticed his tattoo before.
"Your eyes have beautiful flecks of gold in them." The boy under me breathed out and I couldn't help but shiver at the sound of his voice, trying to ignore the fact that he sounded oddly familiar, the sense of not knowing who it was was the best part of this, and he can't screw it up by speaking with that beautiful voice of his.
"Shut up. . . ." I mumbled out and pulled them into another kiss, this one much hungrier and lust filled than the last one as I ran my hands through his slicked back hair that had way too many hair products in it and every second, dread set in more and more as I had a sense of who it was. They began to grumble out curse words between kisses and I whined, knowing exactly who was below me at this point and I couldn't ignore that. I pressed myself against him more until I felt his hardness rubbing against my own with way too many layers separating us. I felt him bite my lip and I jumped, not expecting that at all as blood filled my mouth and his own. The copper taste really wasn't all that appealing and now my lip hurt a bit, but I pushed the pain to the side and growled into the kiss, a bit annoyed at this point. I pulled away and looked at the male right in the eyes. He had blue eyes with specks of silver and green. I panted as I looked at him and noticed the hint of blood on his lips from me. He stared back at me with half lidded eyes as I inspected him, noticing the tears that were on his cheeks had dried and his eyes were slightly puffy and his cheeks flushed. The moonlight hit him in such a way that if I were a photographer. This would be the greatest shot of mankind.
"Wow. . . " He mumbled and I was taken aback and got off of his lap in a hurry, taking a breath as I ran my hands through my hair and nibbled on the bite on my lip, drawing more blood on accident. He stood up with me and reached a hand towards me but I shook my head.
"This. . .can never happen again." I said and Nathan stared at me, his face changing into different emotions and he finally settled on looking pathetic.
"You can't say that. You're my soulmate. Your mark matches mine perfectly!" He held his hand out with the back of it facing up so I could see the mark and I felt my own begin to ache from the lack of contact with my soulmate. There was no way in hell that this. . . this douche was my soulmate. This is taking the Bully/Victim trope way too far. I felt tears running down my face as Nathan stepped closer to me and I couldn't move away, I stood there as he put his hands on my biceps, "Warren. . . .I know . . .I know I'm the last person you expected to be your soulmate. . . . but honestly I was hoping that you were mine? I mean. . .I make fun of you most everyday and probably make your life a living hell. . . .but I knew there was no other way that you would even give me the time of day." I slowly looked up at Nathan and he looked was more nervous than I have ever seen him before. "I'm the one who wrote 'I Heart Warren Gayram' in the bathroom." He admitted and I breathed out a laugh that made him look away in shame and I sighed.
"But. . . me and you? I just. . . this is just really random I guess," I said and he looked at me in confusion, "I don't think we're anything alike, so I guess it's just really random for me." I said shrugging and I stared at the ground, noticing a caterpillar making its way down a blade of grass and couldn't help but think of Max and her mark and how happy she is with her soulmate, maybe I could be happy with mine as well.
"Well. . . .I don't know you all that well except that you're just. . . .really smart and I find you. . .really really attractive." Nathan mumbled and I could feel blood rushing to my face as I stared at Nathan in disbelief that one; he thought I was smart and attractive, and that two; he had no idea how to talk to people who he liked in a cognitive style, he was just going everywhere at this point and I sort of loved how flustered and nervous he was.
"Me? Attractive? I think you're thinking of someone else there." I joked, giving him a smile. Nathan shook his head and smirked at me, his entire demeanor changing into one full of more confidence and rested the palm of his hand on my cheek, bringing me in for another kiss and I decided.
Why the fuck not? I could try this.
I pulled back from the kiss, "You're gonna have to learn more about me now Prescott. You're stuck with me now." Nathan looked surprised at first but once I finished a huge grin spread across his face and that is the first time I have ever seen him smile, I couldn't help but smile back as he pulled me in for a hug, kissing my cheek as he did so and we stood there, just embracing for who even knows how long, and I never wanted it to end.