A few days later….
"Kara?" Cat asked surprised to see her former assistant on her office balcony in the middle of the night.
"Ms Grant?" Kara asked looking up startled. "I'm so sorry. I shouldn't be here. I didn't mean to break in I just wanted to…."
"You just wanted to see lights and the windows?" Cat guessed remembering the conversation she had had with Supergirl weeks before. "To picture the stories behind the windows. To see their light, to feel their light, to absorb their light?" Cat asked. "To remember what that light felt like and what it was like to feel happy?"
Kara listened to Cat and as she did she replayed the conversation she, as Supergirl, had had with Cat. As realisation dawned she looked at Cat and asked.
"You know?"
"I'm not blind. While I admit that double act you pulled fooled me for a little while I soon realised the truth."
"Why didn't you say anything?"
"Because you clearly didn't want to tell me. Plus you had enough on your plate with your uncle taking over the world, your sister wanted for treason, my former assistant trying to kill you and the city being generally less than pleased after you let loose your dark side."
"I am so sorry about the whole throwing you off the balcony thing." Kara said immediately reminded of the event.
"We've had this conversation." Cat said before asking. "Where have you been?"
"With Alex and my foster mother in Midvale. I needed time, away from here."
"Understandable. Did it help?"
"A bit. Thank you for what you did. Writing the article, trying to get me freed. Keeping Alex out of the story."
"That story made me more money than is normally generated in six months, so it is not as if I didn't gain from it." Cat said, trying to shrug off her role. "But you're welcome. So what are you doing here?"
"Trying to decide my future."
"What's stopping you?"
"Fear. I don't want to make the wrong decision because I'm afraid. All I've ever wanted to do was help people. Back home I wanted to be like my mother and ensure that justice happened and make sure people wouldn't get hurt. I guess that why I never had a problem with being asked to leave my planet, my family, my friends and come here to look after my cousin."
"Wait, you were asked to look after your cousin? But he must be ten, fifteen years older than you. I know girls mature faster than boys, but that seems a huge burden."
"Technically I'm older." Kara said. "I got stranded for twenty-four years. So by the time I got here he was all grown up and didn't need my help."
"So you were alone and without purpose?" Cat guessed.
"Not alone. My foster family took me in and they were, still are, great. But I always felt I wasn't living up to my potential."
"What were you doing all that time?"
"Trying to fit in and pretend to be normal, but it was never enough."
"So why did you come out?"
"Alex was on that plane. I couldn't let her die. She was so mad though." Kara said staring out at the city.
"Mad at you for saving her life?" Cat asked confused.
"Mad at me for exposing myself and putting myself in danger."
"But you ignored her and became Supergirl anyway?"
"I had to, I couldn't ignore who I was any longer. I know that I was naive when I started. But I really thought that I could make a difference. That I could help people and they would want my help. But all I have done is create a society where half of them fear me and anyone else who is different."
"Whilst I feel marginally guilty about kicking you while you're down, you really need to check your ego." Cat said. "Society is full of people who hate. To them it doesn't matter who that hatred is directed towards. Normally it is towards the latest bandwagon. This week it's you, next week they'll move onto something else. If you let them stop being you, they win."
"So I should return?"
"That is a decision only you can make. Remember why you wanted to become Supergirl and if you still have the same desires then come back stronger. If not disappear and live for yourself. You owe this world, this City nothing. You have already saved them. But, if you do return your weakness to Kryptonite is out in the open now. People will use it against you." Cat warned.
"I know." Kara said as she continued to stare out over the darkened city. After a couple of minutes Cat said.
"You once said that your job was more important than I realised."
"Yes."
"If it still means that much to you, I suppose you could come back, regardless of whether or not you take to the skies. I will keep it open for a month, let me know before then."
"Thank you. For everything." Kara said.
-00-
"Kara?" Lucy asked the following morning, surprised to see her friend on her doorstep. "What are you doing here?"
"I wanted to talk. Do you mind if I come in?"
"Of course not." Lucy said standing back and allowing Kara to enter her apartment. "When did you get back?"
"Last night." Kara explained as she sat down.
"I am so sorry for what my father did." Lucy said.
"It's not your fault and it wasn't his either." Kara said. "That's the reason I'm here."
"What is?"
"J'onn said you are refusing to speak to your father."
"I am. I can't forgive him for what he did."
"But it wasn't his fault. He couldn't control his actions."
"Do you really believe that?" Lucy asked.
"What I believe is that family is too important to lose. If there is even a chance he wasn't responsible don't give up on him." Kara said.
"How can you be so okay with this?" Lucy asked.
"I know more than anyone what can happen when you aren't fully in control. You gave me a second chance and you had more reason than most not to."
"You knew you had done wrong and you regretted it. What if he doesn't feel remorse?" Lucy asked.
"What if he does?" Kara countered. "At least talk to him before you pass judgement."
"I'll think about it." Lucy agreed before asking. "So are you back?"
"No. I'm not sure I'm ready. I was hoping that by being in Midvale I would want to come back. But being there just caused more confusion, so I came back her for a different perspective."
"I understand. But if, when, you decide to come back, I'm here for you. We all are, especially James." She paused and then said. "Speaking of whom, and tell me to back off if you want because this could be awkward, but what's happening with you and James? He's worried about you."
"I...I don't know." Kara said.
"I thought you two were dating?"
"Technically we still haven't finished a date." Kara said. "Every time something came up. It just feels like the universe is doing everything it can to keep us apart."
"So you are avoiding James to keep the universe happy?" Lucy asked confused.
"I thought that if I saw James it might force me to make a decision that could turn out to be the wrong decision. I needed to figure out what was going on in my head before I brought James into it."
"That makes sense, but don't freeze him out. That's what I did. Remember, this is James we are talking about. He'll do anything for you regardless of if you are Supergirl or if you are dating. He is a good guy. Don't forget that."
-00-
"Agent Danvers. I did not expect to see you." Cat stated as Alex entered her office. "Is Kara okay?"
"She will be." Alex said. "She has gone through so much, but she has this ability to bounce back."
"So what is this visit about?"
"She told me you knew. I need to know if you plan to betray her."
"I have known for months and not said anything. Besides it was your sister that lied to me, not the other way round." Cat said dismissively.
"Kara is special. She can always see the good in people even when they can't see it in themselves. But that makes her trusting, too trusting. As a result of that it is easy for people to let her down or betray her."
"Like her mother?" Cat guessed.
"We'll never really know what happened, but Kara discovering it wasn't the simple black and white argument she had assumed felt like a betrayal to her. Then there was her aunt who she thought was dead only to discover she was still alive and wanted to kill her. Then when her aunt was finally coming round I betrayed Kara by killing her aunt and then lying about it."
"Does she know now?" Cat asked surprised by the admission.
"She does and because she is Kara she forgave me."
"I have no intention of telling the world who Kara Danvers really is." Cat said.
"Thank you."
Assuming the conversation was over Cat looked down at her screen, but noticing Alex was not moving she sat back and waited until Kara's sister was ready to say whatever was on her mind. Eventually Alex spoke.
"Kara really loves working here, working for you. Even though you treated her like crap she loved coming into work. We tried to persuade her to work full time at the DEO, but she wouldn't give this job up. Maybe it was because you treated her so badly, it makes her feel normal. I know she can be a little…"
"Annoying?" Cat suggested.
"I was going with awkward." Alex said. "But she means well. All she wants to do is help people and make a difference. She can't do that alone. She needs help, she always has. She always will. She needs you to be there for her. I need you to be there for her."
"Tell me, do they teach suicide notes at Midvale High School?" Cat asked.
"Excuse me?"
"Just before your sister nearly died saving the world she gave a very impassioned dictated suicide note. Of course she denied it being that but we both know that's what it was. Now you come in and give a very similar tone of speech. So I'm curious, is this something they teach in Midvale?"
"No."
"Just something you picked up in the Danvers' household then? Tell me, what is this suicide mission and why isn't your sister involved?"
"Have you heard of Project Cadmus?" Alex asked.
"I've heard the rumours."
"I have reason to believe my father is being held there."
"Is your father an alien?" Cat asked confused.
"No, but when he disappeared a decade ago he knew more about Superman than anyone else. I was recently given some information about Cadmus and I think I know where it is."
"Can you trust this information?" Cat asked.
"I don't know, but I have to risk it."
"Why not tell Kara?" Cat asked. "After all having Supergirl at your side will give you a much better chance. Especially as you look like you shouldn't be walking let alone raiding secret government facilities."
"If I tell Kara she will become Supergirl. You've spoken to her, you know she is not ready to restart that part of her life. I will not force her down a route she isn't ready for."
"I think you don't give your sister enough credit. She is a lot stronger than she looks. She is ready."
"That is something she has to realise by herself." Alex pointed out.
"And how do you plan on explaining your absence?"
"She thinks I am going to Geneva for a conference. Unless she becomes Supergirl and goes back to the DEO she will never know differently." Alex explained before pausing again. Finally she looked at Cat. "In the event that something happens to me I need you to give her this." Alex said handing a thumb drive to Cat.
"Your actual suicide note?" Cat guessed.
"Everything I know about Project Cadmus." Alex said before adding. "And a letter for Kara."
"Can I use the information on Cadmus?" Cat asked.
"After we have freed my dad or if I don't come back and only as long as you promise not to say anything to Kara."
-TBC
A/N: Thanks for reading and reviewing.