The Scorned King Chapter 8: Desire, a x-men fanfic

Chapter Eight: Desire (or It's a Powerful Thing)

Becoming the Gatekeeper wasn't a dramatic man-to-werewolf transformation. It was kind of like wrapping himself in a universe-sized blanket. The ceaseless press of the Exterminators was unnerving at first, but after a while, it became a comfort. The monsters were out there, not in here. It was easy to follow those unwitting souls pulled through and when they returned home, the Gatekeeper sealed up every crack and mouse hole behind them. Then there were the willing souls – superheroes who "needed" to travel to another dimension. It wasn't easy to meet his old friends as strangers. They weren't happy about the new middleman, either. Who was he to decide whether or not their missions warranted interdimensional travel?

He usually let them pass if he could extract some favor. The Phoenix Five were deteriorating, so would Xavier persuade Cyclops to reject it? Ray wasn't safe in New York, so could the Shi'ar station a solider there full-time? He asked for a few favors for 'On – but she rejected them. She didn't want a winning lotto ticket or a mansion in San Francisco. She wanted freedom.

At some point, they'd managed to conceive – an event she couldn't explain, since she had no memory of him. She watched in horror, he in amazement, as her body ripened with his child. She lost her jobs, took up drinking, and was practically a prisoner on Utopia. Mutant babies were too valuable to abort – no matter what the mother wanted. Every kind thing he sent, she threw away. She was determined to self-destruct and since he could do nothing, he turned away. It was too painful to watch.

The wall had been breached. It wasn't a quiet, easily missed crack, either. Grappling hooks pierced the fabric and then ripped it down, tearing open an enormous freeway into the universe. Nate rushed to the scene – completely unprepared. Tens of thousands of red-fanged monsters darkened the blue and green orb of earth. He followed faster than the speed of light, expecting a slaughter of the unsuspecting planet, but they slipped past SWORD, past planes, skyscrapers, and cars. No one registered their invasion and they touched nothing – until him.

Emplate held the corpse of his latest victim, still sucking marrow from her bones. He was a horrid sight. The mountainous mutant was covered in wild black hair, his face concealed by a respirator. When he saw the monsters – he saw them – he begged for more time. Too late. He was still gulping when they sank their claws into his shoulders and back and ripped him away with a slurp.

Nate had an instant to act.

He created a psionic copy of Emplate, shoved it into the fray, and extracted the mutant. The copy was so good that even it didn't know it wasn't real. They took the bait and retreated the way they'd come.

Why had Nate been so vulnerable? Complacency. It wouldn't happen again.

"You – who are you?"

He reviewed the vampire and realized it was useless to him. Emplate wasn't Shi'ar or SWORD or an X-Man… he corrupted everything he touched. It was hard to condemn a life to that black Hell, but if anyone deserved it, he did.

Nate said: "I didn't protect you because you're innocent. I did it because you're weak. Think about that next time you're hungry."

Then he rushed off to repair the massive freeway crushing his wall.

The Celestials were waiting.

"Gatekeeper. We have words."

"You think I don't know? This looks bad. It won't happen again."

"You interacted in a social manner. This was strictly forbidden."

"I said two words! I haven't exposed anything."

"You created a sentient humanoid. This will not be tolerated again. Life has been carefully created and cultivated for countless millennia. Your interference could jeopardize life in this universe."

"The only thing I'm interested in creating now is a patch. If you aren't going to help, beat it."

His universe wasn't a small, dying town riddled with violence. Sometimes he received people, too. And sometimes they weren't even blood-thirsty superbeings… Like the beautiful ambassador called Sage, who transported refugees from dying planets or collapsing realities. As much as he wanted to help, he had a universe to protect. Every exchange weakened the barrier. Sometimes it was a soft 'no', sometimes it was a firm one, but his response was always 'no'.

Until she learned to bargain.

"I hear you have a soft spot for the X-Men," she said. "Let me pass and I'll help them anyway I can."

He admitted her spaceship carrying 1513 souls. "Go to the Jean Grey School in Salem Center and tell Rachel Grey there's been a baby born in Utopia. It's a member of the Summers family and she needs to find it before it's too late."

She solemnly crossed her heart and led her people to the SWORD refugee station. He didn't think her heroic. If he'd told her to kill that baby, she would have.

Fortifying the barrier of reality was even less fun that collecting dog shit on a rainy day. If monsters wanted to break in, they'd find a way. If bored witches wanted to break out, they'd break out. Once that happened, he couldn't chase, attack, or warn anyone. Gatekeeper. That's all he was.

He erected razor-sharp space distortions. If anyone got beyond that, they fell into a world of madness and chaos. Beyond that, the Exterminators. Let the puny mortals conquer that!

Inevitably, Ray came for answers. He cloaked himself, even though she wouldn't remember him. To her, he appeared as a hunched back, hooded old man.

"So that baby you sent me after…" she said. "Care to explain?"

"Were you successful?"

She put her hands on her hips. "I asked first."

"I don't understand what you don't understand."

"We've done paternity tests on every branch and twig of the Summers family. They've all come back close but no dice. What don't we know?"

"That child's going to be important," he said. "Do all you can to protect it."

She studied his projection, telepathically searching for answers but finding none. "I wonder how you know so much and yet so little."

"I wish I could say more, Starchild, but even I don't see everything. Even I have to answer for my actions… I've said too much already. Farewell."

"Wait! I still don't know-"

Stupid sister.

He'd been in her place before and he knew she thought he'd been intentionally unhelpful. She'd challenged him, forced him to tip his hand… Now the Celestials would accuse him of being social. Would they kill her? Erase his memories, too? Another warning seemed unlikely.

Scanning Utopia for a familiar face, he found Magneto and created a psionic copy to go investigate. But as before, this duplicate didn't know he was a copy and had zero interest in finding a baby. The island was sinking. Evacuation was the best course of action, and he was occupied keeping his failed dream afloat long enough to get everyone ashore. Then he was discovered. Before he killed his clone (oops), someone said all the civilians were safe. Surely that included the baby..?

Ominously, the Celestials were silent. If Nate was going to feel their wrath, by God, he would earn it.

He sent a copy of himself to the Jean Grey School, where some friendly bamfs directed him to Ray in the ladies room.

She screamed when his head popped over the stall divider.

"Where's my child?" he asked.

Her telekinesis threw him across the room. "This is a new low! Attacking an X-Man at a school! In the bathroom!" She quickly wiped and pulled up her pants.

"I come in peace, Starchild! Sorry for the ambush but I haven't much time. I need to find my kid and its mother and get them to safety… If I can."

She opened the door, tense but not aggressive. "Gatekeeper?"

"I used to be called Nate Grey. We're siblings. I can see your doubt and I realize this is a lot to process, but I haven't got time to coddle you. We're all in danger. Where are they?"

Katherine "Katie" Summers was a happy, pudgy two-month-old baby with bright blue eyes and copper curls. Although Ray was her guardian, in practice, she was passed from X-Man to X-Man during the week.

"Katie's a terrible name," he said. "Who picked it? You?"

Ray scowled. "It fits her! She's named for her godmother, thank you very much, and it's a Summers family name."

At two months, she couldn't move much, but she wanted to. Ray placed her on some sensory overload mat, where she strained to look around. He was suddenly worried he'd accidentally step on her. Or the ceiling would fall. Or she'd get tangled in the mat. He never realized how dangerous the world was!

"Here," Ray said, "Hold her."

"I don't want to – I've never held-"

"She can hold her head up, but no jerky movements 'cause she's still wobbly."

She felt soft and wiggly in his statuesque arms. They looked at each other and – nothing. This could've been anyone's kid. He didn't love her. And she was clearly trying to return to the soft, familiar embrace of her aunt.

"You're a natural!" she mocked.

"Where's her mother?"

Her teasing gave way to sorrow. "I don't know. She abandoned Katie at birth. We haven't been able to locate any family."

"You're her family. How many times must I say it?"

"This hasn't been easy, you know. We had to fly her out here, find a doctor, buy a crib, clothes, diapers! I'd never made a bottle before. Do you know you can't make it with tap water? I almost killed her!"

"How else would you make it?"

"You have to boil it. She got sick and I didn't even notice…" She shook her head. "She needs more than I can give her. She needs her parents. I love her to death and I do my best but it's not enough."

He looked at the baby in his arms and wondered how something so tiny could be such a burden. "Will you lend me your telepathy? I think we can find her mother if we work together."

It was nearly time for Katie's nap, so Nate fed her a bottle, burped her, and rocked her to sleep. He hadn't wanted to postpone his search, but Ray insisted.

"This is what it's like to have a baby!" she said haughtily. "Everything else waits!"

Damn Celestials wouldn't wait…

They joined hands and synced minds, which was vaguely akin to using Cerebro. Since 'On was last seen in Utopia, they began their search there, but she'd left too long ago to leave tracks. They expanded to San Francisco and slowly moved up the coast. It wasn't promising. As a P.I., he knew a trail this cold usually ended in the graveyard.

'This is taking forever,' said Ray. 'What if we plant a subliminal message in everyone? Not overt – just a passing curiosity about her.'

'Are you trying to get her organs harvested?'

'Just X-Men, then?'

They sent out a clear, mass message, and Psylocke immediately replied: 'I found your mark a month or two ago. Chinatown.'

She was part of the re-tooled X-Force team, which specialized in pre-emptive strikes. When they came across a factory of Omega Prime Sentinels, Betsy and her team did what they did best. They hit first. They hit hard. They left no survivors.

'She was an exceptional fighter,' said Psylocke. 'We're fortunate she was never unleashed in combat or our losses would've been substantial… But I understand that's cold comfort to you.'

No words scratched surface of what he felt. Misery, sorrow, rage, pain – yes, he felt them all but more than that and deeper, too. It was too much. His pain erupted like a volcano and rained fiery sheets across every atom of the universe. Betsy bore the brunt. Only the combined efforts of Rachel and Psylocke saved her from certain death.

She struck back – instinctively – but his psionic image had vanished.

He would direct his attack at the Celestials. After all, they had promised to keep her safe. They took his name from the world and drove her mad. They would suffer.

Like moths gathering to a light in the dark, they came and surrounded him. Enormous, metallic, and seemingly endless, they presented a formidable sight. But he wasn't afraid. Not anymore.

"You lied to me," he said. "You promised me you'd keep her safe."

"Her mortality expired. We could not prevent it. Our intervention would have stripped her free will, which is forbidden."

He scoffed. "Don't give me that bullshit! You play God all the time!"

"We warned you against forming social bonds."

Realization swept over him. "Did you… did you kill her?"

"She ended her own life. We attempted to spare what remained through the Prime Sentinel program. She was destroyed by Psylocke, but her death was inevitable. This knowledge should already be in your possession."

"You could've stopped her but you didn't."

"It is animal instinct which blinds you to the truth. You cannot control another. Accept this or be consumed by a hunger you can never quench."

He throbbed with rage. "If you didn't want an animal, you shouldn't have hired one. Whole goddamn world full of robots willing to sacrifice their existence for the greater good. I'm not one of them. You lied to me so I'd guard your little gate. I know you'd change me if you could. You'd erase my memories like you did everyone else, but you can't… Now you know I'm pissed so you sent an army to 'reason' with me." He looked around as they closed in. "How many are you? Five-hundred? Six? Good, I like a challenge."

They didn't flinch as the Celestial before him was ripped in two. Inside was hollow. He'd always wondered what lurked beneath their mask. As with most gods, they were empty.

"You can't understand the value of something you've never lost," he said gleefully. "Allow me to enlighten you!"

Their return fire crushed him like a mountain but he was able to slip away and reform. They followed. He'd never seen them as anything other than lumbering giants. They were lightning fast. And coordinated. Moving two at a time, they flanked him, closed in, and chased him back into the fray.

'I'm going to die,' he thought coldly. 'Finally. And all it took was five hundred Celestials.'

Swan-diving, he fell back and splattered on the robotic army. A dozen or more Nates reformed and pierced their armor, sliding inside and smashing his way out again. They swarmed on him. A moving, sentient wall imprisoned him – following wherever he went and constantly rotating damaged units to the back, fresh units to the front. He was spinning, spinning, obliterated and reformed; spinning and spinning again.

He tried to reach over them and climb out of the swarming prison, but every time, they beat him down again. Still, he kept reaching. He reached until someone reached back.

"Don't touch my baby."

The Celestials melted away and the universe filled with white light.

So this was death.

"Jean…?"

"I'm here, son." She was his Jean from his universe.

"Mother… I've never called anyone that before."

"It's a terrible burden to bear. Leave them. Lay down all your troubles and come home."

"I would but… burdens don't vanish when you abandon them. They pass on to others…"

She smiled sadly. "Then let me help where I can."

He'd hoped/expected she'd emerge from the White Hot Room like some cosmic Matrix-Neo with omni-guns a'blazing. Instead, she called a ceasefire and helped negotiate a truce. Really not the climax he wanted, but it was better than being locked in eternal combat with an infinite army.

A year ago, his boat ran aground on the beach of Utopia. The Hellicarrier loomed in the distance and Hope stoically marched towards her fate. Time… Time was against him. Behind him, 'On was crying; ahead, Hope was leaving. Above: the Hellicarrier engines were softly blowing hot air. He had destroyed those engines to rescue Hope, but it had cost his mortal life. Inevitably, it had cost 'On hers, too.

He was here again with the chance to make it right, but could he do it?

"'On, please, we cannot let them take custody of Hope. If we work together-"

She struck in a flash and the world went black. When he awoke, he'd been moved to a hospital cot and judging by the long shadows, several hours had passed. He called out and Rachel appeared, crossword puzzle tucked under her arm.

"Hey there, tiger. How you feeling?"

"Cut the chat. Where's Hope?"

She looked away.

"And 'On?"

"H-Hank doesn't want-"

He swung his feet out but she (and the IV) stopped him from fleeing. Frustrated, he looked in her eyes and saw the truth. 'On had remained on Utopia to receive an abortion, which had already been administered. No. No, this wasn't real. His sweet, happy little girl with bright blue eyes wasn't lost forever. He could re-create her.

"Sorry, hun," he said after he knocked 'On unconscious.

The first time this happened, he didn't realize he could reclaim his powers whenever he wanted, so he'd given it everything he had and reality rejected him. Now he knew better. Telepathically, he summoned the Phoenix Five, who promptly destroyed the Hellicarrier and everyone on it – expect Hope. Bits of burning bodies dropped on the sand.

Well, shit.

"Nate… Honey…"

Reclaiming his telepathy, he erased the Avenger's memories. He made them worship the Phoenix. And Hope? She'd seen the errors of her ways. 'On, too, was happy to live with him, and she quickly forgave Rachel. It wasn't easy, controlling these strong-willed women, but he gave them a happy family life. They'd appreciate him one day. In the meanwhile, he resurrected Jean and made Scott realize he still loved her. Ray was pleased, at least.

"Oh, come now…"

One day 'On slipped free, and in a minute, was dead in the ocean. Seven months pregnant. He fished her out and held her close, wondering where he'd gone wrong. Hadn't he loved her enough? Hadn't he given her everything?

"No," Jean said, "You didn't love her enough to let her be free."

"I just wanted… I wanted…"

"Her?"

"Us. I wanted us to be a family."

She swallowed her disappointment and asked, "Are you done playing with reality? Because the Celestials are prepared to release you from your isolation. In return, they want you to maintain your role as Gatekeeper."

"Be two places at once?"

"You can do it."

The Celestials couldn't give him what he really wanted – 'On, alive and happy. Nor would he give what they truly wanted: blind devotion. So they each accepted what they could get. Nate would serve as Gatekeeper but he was free to return to earth and indulge those pesky 'social bonds'. As his overlords faded, he thanked her profusely.

"You could've done it without me," she said. "After all, you were doomed to eternal combat. An eon… maybe two… I'm sure you would've considered reconciling."

He watched his hands flex. "I'm finally free. I can go anywhere, do anything. All I wanted was…"

"You still have a family, my lamb. But some of us are unseen… And the picture looks a little odd. Doesn't mean we're not a family."

A year ago, his boat ran aground on the beach of Utopia. The Hellicarrier loomed in the distance and Hope stoically marched towards her fate. Time… Time was against him. Behind him, 'On was crying. This was the last time they'd see each other. Nothing he could say would make things right between them, and anyway, she didn't want to "make things right". This was where their paths separated.

"I'm sorry," he told her. "I love you."

Breathe. Focus. Relax.

…

End of Part One

…

Author's Notes: Nate's story is far from over. Originally, I planned to end this story at this point and continue his tales in a separate story. However, he's now so far removed from cannon that the sequel wouldn't make sense without all this information… So it's going to be included as "Part Two". That may take a while. Nate isn't a popular character and since he's mostly involved behind the scenes or outside a team setting, he isn't traditional "X-Men" material at all. Thanks to everyone for sticking with this strange little man! Please let me know what you enjoyed or didn't.