It was a Tuesday. The kind of Tuesday that was nice and also actually a Saturday. Birds were happening in the sky. The sky was happening in the birds. A bunch of people were in a house doing things. Said bunch of people consisted of fast guy, flying drug fox, four-headed dick guy, bat with arms and wings completely separate from each other somehow, boobgina, and someone's Sonic recolor OC. They were all just kind of sitting around and there and stuff. Also they had pizza bagels.

"Dude, these pizza bagels are fucking great, man," Tails stated statedingly as he held one in his hands and looked at it.

"Tails, that's a fork," Sonic pointed out and stuff. "We finished the pizza bagels a half an hour ago."

"Huh..." Tails then began staring deep into the fork. "That explains why this bagel is so shitty."

"The bagels needed something," said Shadow quite suddenly. "And that something is... THE BLOOD OF OUR ENEMIES! AND MORE PEPPERONI!"

"You're right!" declared Knuckles as he stood up and his hands became fists. "WE SHOULD HAVE TAKEN THEIR BLOOD WHEN WE HAD THE CHANCE!"

Sonic then sighed. "And now Shadow's getting everyone to yell things again."

"WE STILL HAVE THE CHANCE!" Shadow yelled dramatically as he jumped on the table. "WE JUST NEED... MORE ENEMIES!"

"Shadow, get off the table before someone commits murder or something," Rouge commanded in a bored, not very commanding voice. Also her name's Rouge now, because apparently that was her name all along. There was a name mixup that no one noticed until she read the birth certificates and stuff.

Shadow turned towards Rouge angrily. "YOU CAN'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO!"

"Just do it."

"Fine!" Shadow then grabbed a cup of water from the table and started sipping it all butthurtly and stuff.

"You mean we're not going to find enemies and put their blood on bagels?" Knuckles asked disappointedly.

"Shit dude, that sucks. This bagel could really use some blood," Tails said as he licked the fork. "It's all cold now too..." He then got up and went off to the kitchen.

"You know what we should all do when he gets back from the kitchen?" Amy began, for she was alive again due to a wizard. "Have an orgy!"

"Not after what happened when we tried that the last time," Rouge replied. "I still can't get the mental image of Knuckles with that lamp shoved up his ass out of my head."

"Well it seemed like a good a idea at the time!" Knuckles yelled as he thought back to how unexpectedly painful it was to shove a lamp up his own ass.

"A better idea would have been unplugging it and removing the light bulb first," Sonic commented annoyedly.

Knuckles frowned a bit. "You're never gonna let this go, are you?"

"Do you think I wanted to have to drive you to the hospital at two in the fucking morning so we could get my lamp out of your ass? And out of all the things in my house that you could have shoved up your ass, why the fuck did you pick the lamp? Why not the broom? Brooms are cheaper to replace and don't have glass in them!" ranted Sonic with anger and hand gestures.

Amy began comforting Knuckles. "Awww, don't worry Knuckles, I still think it was really hot when the blood started leaking out of your anus!"

"And I still think lubrication would have helped," Shadow said quietly while still kind of butthurt. Not nearly as butthurt as Knuckles was when that lamp was in his ass though.

As this stuff occurred, Tails was doing stuff in the kitchen. The fork he had was now on a paper plate with some cinnamon and butter on it, and he was about to microwave it.

"STOP!" screamed a sudden voice that was accompanied by time travel sounds.

There was now a guy standing in the doorway between the living room and the kitchen. His head was weird.

"...what the fuck?" Sonic said after several seconds of silently staring at the guy.

"GASP!" gasped Knuckles in surprise.

The weird head guy turned towards Tails. "I have come from the distant future with a very important warning! Don't microwave that fork!"

Tails stared at the weird head guy for a moment, and then said, "dude, this guy doesn't want me to reheat this pizza bagel."

"Yes, we know, he literally just said that five seconds ago," commented Rouge.

"YOU!" Shadow screamed all suddenly and stuff while pointing towards the weird head guy. "I HAVE NO IDEA WHO YOU ARE!"

"The name's Silver, and I'm here to stop your future from getting..." he then put on a pair of sunglasses. "...heated."

"...okay then." Sonic went over to where Tails was and grabbed the plate with the fork. "Why the fuck were you going to microwave the fork? It's not even food with a fork left in it! It's just a fork!"

Tails shrugged. "I don't know man, it was getting cold."

Sonic stared annoyedly at him and thought of saying stuff, but then Rouge said a thing before he could. "So you went back in time just to save our microwave? Does it breaking cause some horrible future or something?"

"Oh yeah, it caused this sexy bunch of people to need to a new microwave." Silver then winked a wink that was directed towards literally everyone.

"Sexy?" asked Amy excitedly. "Ooh, are we gonna fuck then?"

"You bet your sweet ass we're gonna fuck!" he replied, but then remembered what he was here to do and serioused himself. "But not yet. Today is the day this microwave will be destroyed, and I must prevent that from happening with constant vigilance."

"You mean you're just gonna stare at us all day and make sure none of us break the microwave?" questioned Sonic.

Silver nodded. "Yes. Yes I am."

Sonic sighed, and Rouge kind of just shrugged. "Weirder things have happened," she said. "So what's the future like anyway?"

"Literally every bad thing the environmentalists here said could happen happens," replied Silver kind of sadly. "Global warming, depleted natural resources, bees dying, other stuff..."

"...oh." Rouge was kind of bummed out now.

"Yeah. It fucking sucks. Don't vote republican."

"Wait a minute," began Sonic, "if the environment is severely damaged and the future is really shitty, then why did you go back in time to save our microwave instead of everything else?"

"Well how the hell do you expect me to get millions of people to care about the environment by myself?" whispered Silver in a way that was extremely not whispering. "And what about the politicians that ruined everything? Am I supposed to just show up at the whitehouse at specific times and kill the president?"

It was at that point that Shadow got interested. "DID SOMEONE SAY... KILL THE PRESIDENT?"

"Oh god no," Sonic said, for he knew this could possibly not end well.

"That is exactly a thing that I just said. And I must say, I do greatly enjoy staring at your ass," said Silver as he stared at Shadow's ass.

"Oh yeah? Well it's mine. And you can't have it unless you use lube!" Shadow then glanced over at Knuckles briefly and then stopped glancing at him. "Some people don't use lube. They say they're too cool for it! BUT YOU CAN NEVER BE TOO COOL FOR SAFE SEX, BITCH! YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENS TO PEOPLE WHO THINK YOU CAN? THEY END UP DEAD!" He gestured towards Knuckles at the word 'dead'.

"But I'm not dead!" Knuckles protested.

"Not yet. But you will be."

"Are you warning us about the risks of not practicing safe sex, or threatening to murder Knuckles?" asked Rouge, "because I honestly can't tell which one it is."

"Me neither," answered Shadow.

They then noticed a sound. The sound of someone pressing microwave buttons. They all looked at the microwave and saw Tails pressing microwave buttons and trying to microwave popcorn.

"DON'T TOUCH THAT MICROWAVE!" screamed Silver. He then pushed Tails out of the way and removed the popcorn from the microwave.

"Dude, what do you have against the microwave?" Tails asked all upsetly.

"I have nothing against the microwave! I'm trying to save it from you to prevent its destruction!" Silver explained loudly.

"Come on man, I'm not gonna break the microwave," Tails prostated.

"You tried to microwave a fork! I never trust anyone who tries to microwave a fork!"

Sonic sighed. "Why don't I microwave the popcorn then? And maybe we could all just watch a movie together or something else that has nothing to do with the microwave."

So they did that. Sonic made a bunch of popcorn and then they all watched Sharknado on netflix. Silver had never seen or heard of it due to living in a shitty post-apocalyptic future. But now he had seen and heard of it. And everything was great.

But then part of the wall exploded. There was someone standing in that part of the wall. This someone looked like Sonic. Except it wasn't Sonic, because it was actually a robot that looked like him.

"BEEP BOOP, MOTHERFUCKERS!" declared the robot that looked like Sonic.

"Okay, why the fuck is there a robot that looks like me?"

"BECAUSE I MADE IT!" yelled a voice. Everyone then proceeded to see who it was.

It was Robotguy. He was alive once more.

"YOU!" screamed Shadow as he pointed a gun at Robotguy. "I THOUGHT YOU WERE DEAD! BECAUSE I KILLED YOU, BITCH!"

"HA HA HAAAAA!" laughed Robotguy, "I WAS! BUT I KNOW NECROMANCY!"

Silver was very surprised and stuff. "Oh my god! You're Skeletonguy before he started using an army of skeletons! I've never seen you with actual skin before!"

Robotguy was also surprised now. "HAAAAA! GOOD TO KNOW DEATH ISN'T AN OBSTACLE FOR ME!"

"Dude, didn't you already know that since you came back to life or something?" Tails asked and stuff.

"...oh right. YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN THOUGH! NOW..." he said, and then pulled out a remote thing. "ROBOT SONIC THING, KILL THEM! VIOLENTLY!"

Robot Sonic Thing nodded robotically. "Beep boop."

"GASP!" gasped Knuckles. "WHAT ARE WE GOING TO DO ABOUT THIS?"

"The same thing we did before," Shadow said as he aimed his gun towards the robot. "We are going to MURDER THE FUCK OUT OF THEM!" He then began shooting at the robot.

It did nothing.

"WHAT!" yelled Shadow in surprisedness and anger.

Robotguy began to laugh again. "HA HA HAAAAAAA HA! I MADE IT BULLETPROOF!"

"OH YEAH? WELL THEN HOW BULLETPROOF IS... YOUR FACE!" He then began shooting at Robotguy's face.

It also did nothing.

"WHAT!" Shadow yelled again with more surprisedness and more anger. "IMPOSSIBLE! WHAT KIND OF FORCEFIELD ARE YOU USING, ROBOTGUY?"

"IT IS... BULLETPROOF GLASS!" exclaimed Robotguy, who then began laughing more.

Shadow then gasped dramatically. "NO!"

"YES!"

"NOOOO!"

"YES!"

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"

"YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES!"

"SHUT UP!" interrupted Sonic. Everything was silent for a moment. Then that silence was interrupted.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" noooooooed Knuckles, who wanted to join in on all the yelling.

"Weird how the robot that's supposed to kill us is just standing here while everyone yells at Robotguy," Rouge observed with words.

The robot then realized that it was supposed to be doing things. "Oh. Right. BEEP BOOP!"

"FUCK! WHAT DO WE DO?" Sonic yelled while trying to figure out what to do.

"Dude, what if we put the robot in the microwave, and then turned the microwave on, so the robot was like, microwaved?" suggested Tails.

"GASP!" Knuckles gasped with great dramaticness. "THE ROBOT WOULD BE DESTROYED BY THE POWER OF THE MICROWAVE! PROBABLY!"

"BUT AT WHAT COST?" Silver said with extreme quietness. "THE MICROWAVE WOULD BE DESTROYED AS WELL! I CANNOT ALLOW ITS LIFE TO COME TO AN END, FOR THAT IS THE SOLE PURPOSE OF MY JOURNEY TO THIS PERIOD OF TIME!"

"BUT YOU SAVED THE MICROWAVE EARLIER! IT WAS BECAUSE OF YOU THAT THE MICROWAVE IS HERE NOW, AND CAN SAVE US FROM THIS ROBOT!" Rouge speeched dramatically. "IT MAY BE DESTINED TO DIE, BUT AT LEAST BECAUSE OF YOU, IT WON'T DIE IN VAIN!"

Silver was very moved by Rouge's words. "...VERY WELL." He then turned to the microwave. "Microwave, do you accept your fate?"

The microwave nodded. "I do. I am sad that I must die, but at least I may die of a noble cause. Thank you, Silver. Thank you for giving my death meaning." The microwave then leaped off the counter at the robot that looked like Sonic, and exploded into a glorious explosion that brought a tragic end to the lives of both the microwave and the robot.

"...WELL FUCK!" Robotguy then started leaving. "I'LL BE BACK SOMEDAY! AND I WILL DO SOMETHING! AND YOU WILL PROBABLY NOT LIVE THAT TIME!" And then he was gone.

Silver walked over to the remains of the microwave. Tears began to softly erupt forth from his eyes. "Goodbye, microwave."

There was a moment of silence and mourning. That moment was then interrupted by Sonic.

"...what the fuck just happened?"

After the microwave's funeral, they all went back inside the house. Silver was now preparing to return to his time for now. There were many sad goodbyes and hopes that they'd see him again.

"Wait," Amy said upon realizing something. "We never had all the sex you said we'd have!"

Silver had completely forgotten about that. "...oh my god, you're right!"

"Wanna do that now?" she asked excitedly.

"Totally."

The two then began to have sex. And as the others watched, they all remembered how great that orgy was before Knuckles shoved that lamp up his ass. And so the little bit of sex turned into an orgy of great greatness and also great lacking in any trips to the emergency room this time.

And it was wonderful.