At the very moment when doubt had been cast on how sincere Wendy was involving Butters, there was some evidence refuting that claim going on right then.
Despite the low readership of the school newspaper, it was one extra way for Wendy to spread her views on any given subject, as a recurring op/ed columnist. Now, she was informing the heads of the paper about her next column.
"This'll be the hardest hitting column I've written since the one about the principal buying groceries from a store right wingers go to! This time, the subject is the whole school itself!" Wendy began towards the editor. "Our treatment of 'nerds'- harmless social situation, or degenerative bigotry?"
"Another bigotry column? You've done so many of those that the term has lost it's meaning by now.", the editor said, a bit tired by getting only 5 hours of sleep last night, and by her latest little tirade.
"This time it's different, I'm not taking on the usual bigots! It's the ones right here in our school, and not just Cartman! It's everyone who believes that messing with weaker people who don't fight back is a right of passage! It's that kind of cultural misinformation that turns kids into the grownup bigots and abusers and rednecks that keep the corporate owned politicians in power!"
"So this is another 'corporations must die' piece? Aren't 6 of those in one semester enough? And I thought this was about bullying, not that other stuff, so what are you writing here?"
"I haven't written anything, my study is still ongoing. But I want to reserve a column for about a week or two from now, when I do get finished. I'll have all the juicy facts by then, and it'll rock this place to its core!"
"Oh, like your 'you're racist if you don't re-elect Obama' piece freshman year? That sure turned out great."
"How was I supposed to know Mormons would vote that much for Romney? Even Larry King's clone didn't see them making that much difference for him!" Sighing in impatience, Wendy had to wrap this up before class started. "Just free up that space for me and I'll take care of the rest."
"Do I have a choice?"
"Not if you don't want prejudiced people running this school you don't." Wendy headed off so that would be the last word. Once again, she figured that line of talking would bug him enough to free up the space- and once again, she didn't see that although it got her the win, it also got the opponent cursing and grumbling a lot while he did it. But even so, as long as the objective was achieved, the rest was meaningless.
Though it would only remain that way for the next two hours.
When lunch time came about, Butters once more sat alone, a little tiny bit more dejected than usual. However, with no knowledge of why, Wendy took this in stride. She figured if she was gonna start drumming up controversy over this issue, and her upcoming article, she should start showing it in public. Once they saw her talking to him and not pulling a prank, it would get them riled up and ready to get lectured. Anxious to get started, she cleared her throat loudly once she got to Butters' table, and then satisfied that people were probably watching, she paid her full attention to him.
"You mind if I sit down? I thought we might continue some of our talk from last night."
One small thing happened that wasn't in Wendy's plan- Butters didn't light up or anything, and didn't even look at her. Perhaps he didn't hear her amidst whatever misery happened to him today.
"Ahem, Butters? I'm here to talk to you in public, may I sit down to do that?"
She waited for someone to start objecting by now- but not only did that not happen, Butters still seemed like he wasn't paying attention.
"Oh, I see...well, you don't have to worry about getting hurt for speaking to a popular person. You can speak freely to me."
"Popular...you really think that?", was Butters weird first response in the convo.
"Well...sure, you yourself said it last night. I am popular, and yet I'm talking to you."
"You said I twice...that's more than you talked about me."
"I guess so...and that means?"
Rather than clear it up, he just increased the confusion by moving to sit further away from her. "What is that for?", Wendy asked, but wasn't rewarded with an answer.
"Butters, I told you, I have the power to talk to you and get away with it, and I'll make them see it soon!"
Now she was indeed getting attention, but not in the way she had worked towards. The plan further fell apart when Butters finally turned to face her and got everything out in the open.
"You could have just asked me for help if you wanted to make everyone look like bigots and less enlightened than you cause they pick on me. But you just tried to trick me since you wanna get your name mentioned more than helping me. Bebe, Red, and Jordan filled me in, and everyone else confirmed that you help people like me just to get noticed and no one likes you for it! That's no real way to help someone...but I probably still woulda helped you if you just let me know about it instead of tricking me...like those people that you think are bigots do."
With that, he left to find another table or another room to eat at- leaving Wendy to face the stares, the fear, and the agreement equally divided among the mix of people watching.
Once she gazed the reactions of everyone else, she moved to find three specific faces in the crowd- Bebe, Red, and Jordan.
"May I speak to you for a moment now?", she asked while making extra sure to show her gritted teeth.
"What in the good God did you tell him?!"
"The truth, wasn't it?"
"You told him I was using him to advance my own agenda and paint everyone as evil!"
"Again, wasn't that the truth?"
Before Wendy and Jordan got even closer to each other in anger, Bebe decided to make at least one effort to prevent war.
"Look, all they said is that they think you're not being sincere. No need to start punching them out for that, right?"
"It sounds like they told him more than that!"
"And what if we did?", chimed Red.
"Then we'll come to that when it comes, but-"
"Oh, shut up Bebe! Wendy, no one likes you, we hate how you're stuck up and brag about how 'enlightened' you are and how stupid every white male and white Republican is, and we can't stand your bitching! All you do is bitch and whine and we hate it! We just pretend not to because we know you're unstable enough to murder us for it like you did Miss Ellen- who by the way, never wanted to screw Stan in the first place! Shows how smart you really are!"
When Red was finished, Bebe cringed in waiting for the blood to spill, while Jordan got herself steady in case she needed to join in. Wendy stood still though, and her hands weren't fists yet, so they had a little more time.
"How dare you go off base like that...I try to help in fixing this screwed up place, and this is the thanks I get?"
"See, once again, you just keeping talking about your efforts and how screwed up the rest of us are! You think people like being told they're evil and stupid and guilty just because they're white every single day?!" screeched Red.
"Is it screeching if it's true?", was Wendy's question following a question. "They're mad because I tell them the truth that they're not smart enough to figure out yet. And they won't get that smart unless I help them."
"Or lecture them until they feel guilty for evil stuff that half of them didn't even do.", added Jordan.
"They've never stopped others from doing it, so that makes them just as bad. It's really a simple thing, if you know how to think about it."
"Wendy, you're probably digging yourself into more of a hole with this.", pointed out Bebe. "You're making it sound like if we disagree with you, we're all psychopaths who enable evil Americans. That can't be what you really think."
"It's an exaggeration of the truth, but if it helps get people there, then it's an apt one."
With that, Red and Jordan stopped using words and headed right towards grabbing her by the arms and taking her with them down the hall.
"Let me go, you racists!!" But that hardly stopped them from heading back into the newspaper office, and in fact made them head inside a lot quicker. Once they did, Red and Jordan headed to the editor.
"Open the door to the secret letters, please." The editor looked up after Red's question, and then looked to see Wendy there as well.
"Wait, she's here with you? So why the hell should I risk my life doing that, then?"
"She's here to read them, and she's not going away until she does."
"The hell I'm not, Jordan! Don't listen to this white people propaganda!"
"She's gonna be made to see the truth once and for all, and the letters are gonna do the job. Open the office to them now, and you'll never have to be bulled into putting her in the paper again!"
Red's way with words did the trick, as the editor actually smiled at this and headed for an office door. When he opened it, Red and Jordan took Wendy inside to show her it's content- a room with very little to speak of except five brown, sealed boxes piled together.
"This is the room contain all the negative letters to the editor you've gotten since freshman year. Why do you think all the commentary and letters about your articles have been 100 positive? Whatever you think, it's wrong, because the editor hid all the negative letters away and didn't print them! Why would that be? Because you're so bossy and superior and quick to anger that you'd have beaten up your opposition! They knew it and wrote those letters anyway, even though they knew they would never get published! They had to take their frustration out somehow, though! And now you're going to read every unpublished negative opinion that's been written about you for the last 2 1/2 years! We were wrong to hide them for this long, but at least we know when to stop doing stupid things!"
As Jordan's long speech went on and one, Red took some keys from the editor and locked the door so escape was improbable. Wendy looked at the both of them, then at a silent Bebe, who was hoping this would be over with no teeth spilled on the floor.
"So you let me go if I read these comments?"
"We can do over the top things to get the truth out as well. But unlike you, we're actually gonna get somewhere with it. Everyone's written at least one letter in there, so let's start comparing them.", wrapped up Red.
And with that, Red and Jordan took the boxes and started to open them. By the time their insides were revealed, they could see about 30-40 envelopes inside each one. And since this made Wendy stop frowning out of surprise at seeing so many, the other girls figured they'd better start opening the letters themselves and showing them to her while they could- while the window of opportunity to show Wendy the light was this open.
All told, according to Red and Jordan, it took them an hour to get through all the letters. When Wendy was allowed to return to her classes, they explained she was too busy working on the paper to come earlier, and the teachers bought in. Wendy said no more words for the rest of the day, and left school faster and quieter than everyone else.
By then, the gossip was well under way, and the word that students didn't need to bite their tongues about Wendy anymore was well past out. Relief filled pretty much all of the mob of students.
"Man, it is about time! You girls did quite a service for us!", exclaimed Clyde.
"Finally, we can actually debate her when she bashes everyone but herself! That'll save so much aggravation and eye rolling!", added Kyle.
"Now instead of calling her a bitch under our breaths, we can do it out loud!" an unnamed girl who wasn't in the South Park kids group in elementary school pointed out.
"And to think, it all started when Mr ball-less here got the balls rolling!" explained Craig when he pointed to Butters. "He set the stage, and these genius hotties took up the slack! Finally, what a time for the Melvin to act like an actual human being and trash someone!"
"Yeah, I guess at least 1 of him is more human than made up of fag juice!" added Cartman, who people only listened to at times like this, when someone just as unpopular was being discussed. "Way to step outta the fag trend for the first time ever! You partly stopped the bitch's tyranny!"
The completely unfamiliar sight of people approving of something Butters did continued with some applause and praise for a few more seconds.
"So...you're happy with something I did because I insulted someone else?"
"Someone who deserved it for trashing us for years! At least this time when you fought back against someone, it's someone we approve of hating!" Craig continued. "So no pranks on you for the next two days!"
"Because I made her feel despised and hated?"
"Because you finally acted like a real person, so don't go back to fagland already, k?" Cartman asked while really giving an order.
By the time Butters figured out what he wanted to say to that, the others had already left.
Butters had been informed by Wendy's mother that she had not come out of her room since school ended. However, he figured he could still do what he came to do without that being a problem. So he headed up the stairs to the door of her room, and quietly knocked.
"Wendy? Can you hear me?"
No answer came. And unbeknownst to him, he was barely being heard in the first place because those letters from the editor's office had Wendy's full attention, as she reread them for the 4'th time today. Without that knowledge, he figured she could still hear him anyway, and went on.
"Look, I...I heard what happened today, and everyone's giving me credit for getting it started. But I didn't wanna...so, so I just came here to say I was sorry, and I'm okay with you using me for your own political gain."
Still no response came, but this time he had an audience now. The reading stopped as she listened in more closely.
"I've pretty much been used all my life for one reason or another...all of it's been for other people's selfish gain. They're all saying you're selfish, but at least you're selfish for the right reasons. Even if you just do it to get attention and stroke your ego, at least you're bringing attention to a real problem! You're doing some good while being selfish, which is more than I could say about everyone else! If I gotta be used and manipulated, at least this time I know it's gonna do some good...at least your using isn't gonna hurt me on purpose."
Without knowing how his attempt to make her feel better was actually increasing her uneasiness and guilt, he went on.
"I just...I just wanna talk to somebody who isn't as bad as them. I don't care if you think of me more as an object of oppression than a real friend...at least that's better than what they think of me. Heck...at this point, I'll take talking and pretending to be friends with anyone rather than no one. You were right...those days of me thinking a lot of people could like me one day are over. I have no one to hang around with, talk to, or share my feelings with without being called gay or worse. And I probably never will for the foreseeable future. Even though we won't be real friends and even if you're just pretending to put up with me...I'd accept that as the closest thing to friendship I'll get. And you can quote that in your article if you want, okay? So...I don't care if you're underhanded...at least it's an underhanded that's better than anything else I know. So don't let today ruin that, please?"
The trend of her not saying a word continued on, until Butters figured he wasn't gonna stop it. Deciding to leave her alone so she could consider his request, he headed on his way home.
She never came close to wanting to come out of her room for the rest of the day.
The tipping point came over the next two days. Word was fully out that no one had to suck up to Wendy anymore, or pretend to approve of her comments to avoid her wrath. As such, since Wendy didn't bother to make comments, no one talked to her or came near her. They just left her alone, as some were still trying to get ready for whenever she would snap, and some just didn't wanna talk to her period. Bebe wanted to come over and comfort her, but eventually figured she would have a better chance of being heard if she waited a few days, thinking Wendy needed that time to calm down. For that time period, Wendy was invisible and ignored as anyone else bringing up the rear of the social food chain.
Absolutely none of it was lost on her.
As a mostly privileged girl who raised herself to be the moral crusader of South Park, she never really had to face hardships. Aside from Stan's old puking habit and explaining to Bebe why she had to tell guys she broke up with them for her, everything came easy. She stood up for what she thought was the undeniable truth, so therefore, if she said these things, no one could question her judgment or tact or else they exposed themselves to be evil brainwashed tools. That was how it worked ever since she could remember- that was the only way she'd ever known. For all the praise she'd gotten in the right circles, it must have been the right way- unless they were lying behind her back as well. After this, who could say?
Anyway, the main point was that she assumed people liked what she did, liked how smart she was, and appreciated her. Now all that was in danger of being a giant lie, if it already wasn't. But how could everyone hate her just for doing good? What the hell had she done for people to have a negative knee jerk reaction to her? All she did was the right things, did it matter how she did them? Who were they to act like she was no better than...than...
...than the very people she had professed to help all these years...people like Butters...and her first reaction was to be angry at being considered to be as low as they were. Having a first reaction of anger and embarrassment at Butters was how this entire mess started...partly to get rid of her fear that she was like those uneducated people. But now...now she was on the level of Butters via being pretty much hated by everyone.
Now she really was as looked down upon of one of the people she championed...and she hated it. She hated it a lot after only two days of putting up with it, and couldn't figure out how people like Butters dealt with it every day...
Every day...
...every day for at least 9 or so years, if not more...every day of his life...
...she couldn't stand it for two days...and it took him 9 years to be completely broken by it...
...the pure and utter hell she felt multiplied by about a billion days was his life 24/7...and the toll of that was clearly shown in that speech from earlier.
The boy who wanted to be friends with everyone and show love and kindness to all, now had been broken enough to want to be used and discarded by someone willingly, as long as it helped him pretend he had a friend...even that was better than everything else he had going for him.
That was how low his standards for friendship had been forced to fall?
All that after feeling for years what she had only put up with for two days?
If she was that upset about going through that, how many zillions of time worse had his life been?
If she now knew first hand how it felt, the depths of his despair now seemed like they could fill up two solar systems...and as horrible as it was, she did not and could not see it until recently.
Once more, she was faced with the horrific realization that she had ignored a truly rotten situation for years right under her nose, and she wasn't truly compassionate enough to see it and stop it earlier, no matter what she had tried to do for him now.
And the fact that he was the only one she knew that did not write a negative unpublished letter about her articles all this time was an impact maker as well.
This time, she could not disguise her guilt.
This time, she could not hide behind the evils of everyone else.
This time, she had to put up with the fact that she really was no better than all those others who ignored him and his friendship.
This time, she had to face that if she really was the equivalent of those others in this case- was she really their equivalent in others?
All those letters and all those nasty words she had been exposed to this week said that she was.
She did not truly care for those she stood up for, they said...and now, she had nothing to prove them wrong.
She never really felt for them as a person...until now, now that she finally had an idea what it was like to live the kind of life Butters had gone through, and even then it wasn't nearly close to his kind of misery.
This was the kind of misery she only cared about when she could make a social statement out of it. And even then, when he could see that before she could, he believed it was the best relationship he could ever have.
To pretend to be friends with someone no one else could stand...much like no one could stand him...
By the time she found herself at Butters's house after all these thoughts consumed her very being, her breakdown of tears and sobs had already begun. And even as Butters ran outside and led her towards his living room, there was no sign it was gonna end anytime soon.