Disclaimer: I do not, and unfortunately will never own Ranma ½. The story, and characters all belong to a wonderful woman named Rumiko Takahashi. The only thing that I own would have to be myself, and hopefully some part of the plot used for this fan fiction. ...I don't own The Nightmare Before Christmas, which is briefly mentioned in this chapter. I also don't own the rights to sugar-free cookies. ...Do cookies even have rights?

Hmmm... 200 hits but only 5 reviews so far?

Oh well, at least people are actually taking a look... Plus, it's not too shabby. After all, the first chapter has only been up for a day or two.

(I'd still really love to see some more reviews though.)

...Are you sure that there's no possibility of me owning Ranma ½?

...No?

Well, damn.

Anyway, I hope you enjoy it!

It was a lovely day in the Nerima ward. The sun was shining, the birds were singing...

"Pervert!! Get Him!!"

...And it looks like Happosai has just started his daily rounds.

The martial arts master held his captives tightly, a wide grin plastered across his face. 'New treasures... Oh, my little beauties...' With that thought firmly planted in his mind, he yelled out his battle cry.

"What a haul!! What a haul!!" Then he jumped to the rooftops, the angry mob of women hot on his trail.

All in all, it was a perfectly normal start to an average day in Nerima.

A young blond woman looked up as both the perverted master and the usual mob of righteous feminine fury ran past her in the park. She watched it with a little smile before looking back down to the sketch pad in her lap. The chase always seemed to give her a little bit of a boost in the morning. She chuckled to herself a little as she thought of the drawing that Happosai would be coming back to collect from her later.

Her main source of money was rather simple, as it was just using her ring to wish up random jewelry for her to sell. The only problem with it was that most people didn't feel comfortable buying jewelry from some random foreign girl on the street, and as a last resort she had to try selling them to various antique shops. Who, while still suspicious of her, would at least buy them for a decent amount.

It was also crazy how much money you could make by drawing slightly perverted pictures in Nerima. She was definitely glad about that little fact, otherwise she really would have been in a whole lot of financial trouble.

She was actually very glad that Happosai was currently around, even if it sounded a little weird for a girl to say. It was a complete stroke of luck that she had met him. After all, if she hadn't...

...She really didn't want to think about what could have happened.

Contrary to popular belief, Happosai, also known as 'Happy', was not some kind of evil monster.

He was a pervert, of course. There's no possible way of denying that rather obvious fact.

...But that doesn't immediately turn him into some kind of horrible heartless beast.

Deep down, if you look past all of the perversion, deceit, and thievery...

He was an excellent (though, maybe a little cruel and sadistic) teacher.

He was also the Grandmaster of an entire school of Martial Arts.

He actually does his duty as a marital artist, protecting civilians from life-threatening dangers. (As long as they didn't piss him off in the first place, of course.)

...Don't look at me like that, I'm just the Narrator.

What, you still don't believe me?! ...I'll admit that it does sound a little odd...

...Fine. I'll show you.

Flashback: A few days ago
The same blond woman from earlier could be seen exiting a rather trashy looking antique shop, a huge smile lighting up her face. She turned to give a cheerful wave to the shopkeeper before allowing the door to close and then began walking down the street. She closed the wallet in her hand, dropped it down the front of her shirt for safekeeping. You could never be too careful around some of the pickpockets in this city.

Things had really started looking up for her. She had gotten lost and ended up walking into that particular store to ask for directions. Who would've thought that they would be interested in some random jewelry and accessories that she had thought up? Five sets of one design had been bought off her for a somewhat decent price!

With this kind of money, she wouldn't be forced to shoplift from any of those cheap little stores anymore. Yes, shoplifting. How else was she going to get what she needed? A few fruits, a mini hairbrush, and a small tube of chap stick wouldn't be missed by those racist shopkeepers. They deserved it, and could go off and rot somewhere for all that she cared.

Besides, she really wasn't the type of person who would sit on the side of the street and beg. She wasn't some poor beggar, and she definitely didn't look like it. It was all thanks to her beloved little magical ring. The whole shape shifting clothes thing actually turned out to be more useful than she had originally thought.

She did a small happy twirl before walking down the semi-deserted dark streets, unaware of the eyes on her. Or, more specifically, where she had placed her wallet.

Meanwhile, our perverted little martial arts master was busy cuddling one of his newest treasures to himself. He was alone on a peaceful rooftop basking in the company of various undergarments, his 'silky darlings' as he so lovingly called them.

Unfortunately, Happosai's precious little moment was shattered as a scream suddenly tore through the night. He growled to himself, immediately thinking that the original owners of his darlings had caught up to him... Before he noticed just how frightened the scream had sounded. In a split second decision he quickly stashed his beauties away, and jumped across the next few rooftops.

'A Martial Artist's life is always filled with peril.' he couldn't help but think to himself as he heard a considerably louder feminine scream from somewhere nearby. He stopped and looked down from his perch on the edge of the rooftop, and glared at what he saw.

There was a rather large young woman struggling to break free from two obviously stronger and much older men. One had a knife to her neck and a secure hold on the hands that were twisted behind her back, while the other had just shoved his hand down her blouse.

Happosai was livid. Sure, he was a liar, and a thief. He would grope a few girls and maybe steal a spare pantie or two, but at least he never actually threaten their lives! If he did, then there would be less panties for him to steal in the future!

He silently jumped down from rooftop.

...Needless to say, those thugs were down before they even knew what hit 'em.

End Flashback
To cut the story short, they had decided on a mutually beneficial deal. He didn't steal her belongings and would protect her when she needed it, as long as she drew him a few perverted little pictures. It wasn't all that hard, really.

Both her, and some of her friends were known to have a bit of a perverted streak, so at least she had a bit of experience with drawing. In her opinion, she did not draw pornography. It was merely a collection of semi-nude pictures, drawn in slightly provocative though artistic poses.

The blond smiled to herself as she finished the shading on her latest drawing. "Perfect. He'll really like this one." A sudden tap on her shoulder made her jump up and shriek in surprise. She stared blankly at the tiny old man who now occupied her seat on the bench, before finally smiling at him. "Hello, Master Happosai."

He looked up at her with a small perverted grin, "Why, hello! Have you got anything new for me?"

She merely sighed before carefully ripping it out of her sketchbook and handing it over to him. She did get a small bit of satisfaction when his grin got even wider. 'At least the paper wasn't wasted.'

He rolled up the picture and tucked it into his shirt, and then pulled out a rather lacy piece of lingerie. "Do you think that you could include this next time?" His eyes looked wide and hopeful.

The blond looked the garment over for a second before sighing again and nodding her head. "Sure thing, Master Happosai. I'll try to have it done for tomorrow, okay?"

The little old man's face lit up, "That'll do, that'll do!" He chirped, before turning and leaping away. "See you tomorrow, Ashley!"

The young woman waved at his vanishing figure for a moment before walking behind the bench and into one of the much larger groups of trees. 'It's like a miniature forest, I guess.' She thought, as she finally came up to her tent. It wasn't as big as what she had initially wanted, but it was currently her home.

'Just a little while longer, and I'll have enough money to rent a cheap apartment.' She went inside and came out with a large black messenger's bag, carefully shifting through it's contents. After a minute or two of searching, she finally pulled out a small blue hairbrush, and quickly ran the brush through her slightly greasy hair with a grimace.

She hadn't been able to properly wash herself since she had arrived, and it was starting to show a little. She didn't smell bad, but her hair was getting dirty. By now, she definitely had enough money for the public bathhouse... But there was no way in hell that she was actually going in there.

'Japanese people are a little weird sometimes...' She couldn't help thinking to herself. It definitely wasn't a racist thought, just her opinion. She really didn't understand how the heck people could be comfortable bathing with strangers.

It had been embarrassing enough to have to get changed in front of the other girls in gym class, and she had no intention of ever doing it again. As much as she wanted a bath, she wasn't about to get naked in front of random people that she didn't even know.

She finished brushing her hair, and quickly shifted her shirt into a black hoodie with a pink skull pattern. 'I guess I'll go rinse my hair in the water fountain when it gets dark... Again.' With that thought she drew the hood over her head, hoping to hide the majority of her hair. She shoved the hairbrush into her bag and pulled out a city map. After a few moments of reading the map, she put the bag's strap over her shoulder and decided to set off.

So far, Ashley had been rather lucky. Since her unexpected arrival into this world she had managed to spot the Amazons, Ukyo who had been busy cooking okonomiaki in her shop, and had almost run directly into Ryoga twice.

During those encounters, she had been smart enough to remain in the background and avoid their notice. She really didn't want to get too involved with them yet, as she was still trying to figure out the exact point in the storyline that she had fallen into.

Currently however, she was watching the eldest Tendo daughter happily do her shopping.

Thankfully, price tags and brand names were the first things that she had learned to read decently, but her limited knowledge had come after a few hard games of trial and error. It had been rather embarrassing when she had gone out to buy some Advil, and had accidentally brought home a bottle of Viagra instead... No wonder the woman behind the counter had been looking at her funny.

...It definitely hadn't been a mistake that she wanted to repeat.

Her small stash of food probably needed refilling... Who knows, maybe Kasumi would be able to help her with some of the harder words that were still giving her trouble. Knowing Kasumi's kind nature, she was suddenly filled with hope. 'At least I know that she won't mutter nasty things about me under her breath...'

Kasumi hummed cheerfully to herself as she checked her shopping list, she was almost done and had plenty of time left before she had to get home and start preparing dinner. The Saotomes had cleaned out the refrigerator again, the second time this month. She was really going to have to hint to her father to at least ask Mr. Saotome to pay for half of the food bill...

She was suddenly startled out of her thoughts by a gentle tap on her shoulder. Kasumi turned to see a foreign young woman in a skull-patterned hooded sweatshirt, who was looking at her with a bright smile that definitely didn't match the way that she dressed. "Um... Excuse me, Miss?"

Kasumi tilted her head to the side, "Yes?"

"I'm terribly sorry to bother you... But... Would you mind sparing a moment to help me?"

She blinked at the polite young woman, "With what, may I ask?"

At this the girl looked embarrassed, a slight flush coming to her cheeks. "Well... I can't really read what one of these signs say. Could you please tell me what they are advertising?"

The eldest Tendo smiled kindly and nodded, and after she was led to the sign she took a little extra time to point to each word as she said it. "Sugar-free cookies on sale for half-price." She turned back to the girl still smiling. "Is that all you needed?"

Ashley was looking at the advertisement with little stars in her eyes. Cookies that she could eat! Yes! She eagerly grabbed a few packages of the cookies before turning to Kasumi and giving her a slightly clumsy bow, a huge smile lighting up her face. "Oh, thank you so much!"

Kasumi couldn't help but giggle, "Oh my, you're certainly welcome!"

The blond happily started walking towards the checkout counter, before pausing and rushing back to Kasumi with an embarrassed face. "Oh! Sorry... My name is Ashley-marie, I've only recently arrived in Japan... I'm so sorry for taking up your shopping time with my silly question..."

"My name is Kasumi Tendo, and it honestly wasn't any trouble at all. Welcome to Japan!" She gave the younger girl both a perfect bow and smile.

"It was nice to meet you, Kasumi! I'll see you around, okay?" With that, Ashley waved and started walking to the checkout again.

After waving back to the departing girl, Kasumi went back to her shopping a glowing smile on her face. 'Such a nice girl...' On a random urge, she grabbed a small package of the sugar-free cookies. With the kind of reaction that the blond had given, they had to be worth trying.

'Well, that went along smoothly...' Ashley cheerfully thought to herself, as she walked down the street an few minutes later. She gazed lovingly at the shopping bag in her hand. 'Sugar-free cookies...'

They had been a major bonus. She could get some regular food later, when her stash completely ran out. For now... Cookies would do.

Anyway, the first meeting with Kasumi had definitely gone well. Kasumi had always been her favorite out of the Tendo sisters, and just being able to actually meet her had given her a warm happy feeling as well as a semi-permanent smile on her face.

She stopped at the street corner and opened up the city map, happily humming, and occasionally singing a few parts of the beginning song from 'The Nightmare Before Christmas' as she scanned through her current area. "This is Halloween, this is Halloween..."

She was still reading the map as she started crossing the street, making sure to look both ways every so often. That didn't prepare her for when she suddenly tripped over something, causing her shopping bag to dump one of the packages of cookies onto the street. She glared down at what ever had dared to harm her precious cookies, only stop and stare blankly.

She had tripped over... A duck?

The duck was wandering around quacking and flapping it's wings at thin air. It also had ...glasses perched on it's head? She blinked, she only knew one duck who was capable of wearing glasses.

She reached down and picked it up, and then continued her way to the other side of the street despite the duck's fierce struggling and quacks of anger.

Once she was safely across the street, she crouched and fixed the ducks glasses before gently placing it back on the much safer ground. "There, is that any better?"

The little duck seemed to stare at her for a second before quacking and bobbing it's head in what could only be described as a thank you. She couldn't stop the smile from forming her face. After all, it wasn't everyday that you were genuinely thanked by a little duck.

A sudden loud crunching noise made her look back to the road in shock and horror. Some bastard had just run over her cookies!

The duck followed her line of vision, and quite visibly gulped as it observed the crushed cookie package. It was in the exact same spot that he had been wandering around with his glasses off... It certainly didn't take a genius to figure out what could have happened to him.

He turned to look back up at the large blond woman who had apparently rescued him, only to see her staring sadly at the cookie remains that were now scattered all over the road. She got up from her crouching position with a sigh and finally turned to offer him a smile.

"Be careful, okay?"

Mousse just nodded as he watched her walk away. 'Well... You don't see that everyday.'

Yes, I do have a complete and utter obsession with sugar-free cookies, so... They were included in this chapter! Yay!

...Don't look at me like that. They're good. ...Really!

Anyway, sorry about it not being as long as the last chapter...

The next one will be longer though, I promise!

What did you think of it, anyway?

Good?

Bad?

Holy-shit-learn-how-to-freaking-type?

Review and tell me!

Luv,

Shifta Shi-Chan(aka Ashley)

xoxoxo

(P.S. If anyone's still confused about my appearance, I've posted a pic of myself on my profile. Hopefully it'll keep me from writing out detailed blurbs on what I look like.)