This is a really short... something, that I wrote at about 2 in the morning today, and although it wasn't meant to be a fanfic or anything, I guess this could be interpreted from Alex Eames' perspective. This would be set after purgatory when she's very confused about everything in her partnership.
It's really quite funny if you think about it. Not 'ha ha joke funny', but more of a strange 'aha' funny. It's amusing that to describe silence, you have to use the words 'sounds', or 'noise'. Because the only way that I can think about describing silence is by saying that it is a lack of sound, or the vacuum that is left when you take away all kinds of noise. I can't seem to think of anything else, because usually you get silence when you lack the knowledge of what to say. It represents a loss of something, but that loss brings a gain. You reach conclusions, you think clearly, you can do many things and use that lack of sound to your advantage.
But after years of trying to get a moment of silence, just when the going gets a little too tough, I can't seem to get it. Every time I really need that silence; to think, or wallow, or just be, I never actually get silence. I get this special in-between, where you get a sort of silence, but all this extra stuff that goes along with it. When I'm frustrated, or just plain mad, I reach a standoff with him, which has silence, but you still have a voice screaming at the back of your head, and loud breathing. Breathing brings with it sound, and silence is a lack of. Then through loss, people cry; at work, people speak, and at home, it's telephones and tv that accompany the silence.
For me, I need a balance; a person to give me this knowledge as to how silence works. Because I want to lack the noise my life has become, at least for a little while. Words mess up something beautiful, pure and perfect. And I know that in this silence, everything would fall into place. After that brief silence, I would lack, not noise, but I would lack the problems that words, laughter and cries have brought me. That lack of everything, for those few moments would make me appreciate the delicate chaos caused by noise.
My personal definition of silence is, a lack of noise. And the brief moment of silence I willsomeday get, will, just like its definition, begin with a lack, and end with noise.
Hopefully, you find it in your hearts to review; just like you would want someone to review a story of yours.