"Hey there you are! Wow isn't this cool??" Alice was as bright as ever, watching the stage hands set up the all-too-famous Ellen Degeneres Show set.
Shane wasn't paying attention, the recent flood of memories that she had a few minutes ago still had a hold of her. She blinked a couple times and brought herself back to reality.
'Pull yourself together for fuck's sake.'
She put her hands deep into her pockets and smiled up at Alice,
"Yeah, this is pretty cool Al"
Alice smiled warmly back at her and put a hand on her shoulder,
"See, told you you'd thank me later… and holy crap, there's Ellen."
Shane followed Alice's open-mouthed gaze and there standing a few yards away from them, was Ellen Degeneres. Shane felt Alice's grip on her shoulder tighten.
"Al."
Alice was staring, oblivious to the fact that she was slowly cutting off the blood to Shane's right arm.
"ALICE!"
"Huh? Oh right, yeah sorry." Alice quickly let go and turned back to the dressing rooms.
"Where you going?"
"I wanna check my hair's okay…wait right there." Alice rushed off back into the rooms.
Shane took a seat a chair by the stage and slowly began to drift away in her thoughts.
'You're not living your life, Shane.'
'Whoa. Why are you thinking about this? What are you doing??'
'And if you don't take any risks...'
'What are you doing?! Stop! Why think of this now? After so long of forgetting it all huh?! You can't change anything, so you might as well forget it!'
Her mental argument was suddenly interrupted,
"Hello?"
Shane eyes suddenly opened as she sat up in her seat.
"Oh, sorry, didn't mean to wake you there. Just thought I should introduce myself, I'm Ellen." She held her hand out, and Shane cleared her throat and shook it, "So you must be, Alice?"
"Oh, no no, I'm Shane. I'm Alice's friend."
"I'm Alice. Hi"
Shane turned around to find Alice leaning against her seat, with her make-up re-applied, and her hair freshly done.
"Awesome. Pleasure to meet you Alice."
"Oh no, no, pleasure's all mine. Seriously I'm a huge fan of the show."
"Great, well I hope you enjoy being on it!"
'EVERYONE PLACES PLEASE. LIVE IN 1.' The same booming voice came from the loudspeakers and Alice followed Ellen eagerly onto the set, dragging a not-so-eager Shane with her.
--
Off set, everyone was silent. 10 minutes into the show and the audience were already at the mercy of Alice and The Chart.
Carmen pushed open the backstage doors quietly with two electric cables in her hand. She walked over to a balding man with a clipboard and handed them to him.
"Hey thanks Carmen." He whispered. His breath reeked of coffee and stale doughnuts.
"Uhum" She walked off hurriedly in order to prevent herself from hurling.
She was thankful to get away from the stench and took a seat by the side of the stage and looked up onto the set.
She hadn't realized how much she missed being around everyone. Alice was her usual self, optimistic and comedic, getting laughs from the audience from talking about a simple thing like her website. Carmen moved her gaze onto Shane, and then looked down at the floor.
Damnit. Don't look at her.
But she couldn't help herself.
Shane sat there listening intently to the conversation, and smiling and nodding in the right places. So far so good.
"So Shane, what's your part in all of this?"
Crap.
"Uhm. Well, I didn't really have anything to do with making it"
"Yes- but you do use the chart; you are online in a constellation of your own am I right?"
"Uhm, Yeah, sure"
"So. Tell me about it; has it helped you find love?"
Alice laughed nervously, and gave Shane an apologetic look.
"Uhm, I don't know, I guess it depends on the circumstance, and being online and all-"
"Well, anything's possible. I sure have ogled at my computer screen many a time", the audience buzzed with laughter, and to this the host winked nonchalantly. "So, just out of interest, as a user of the Chart, what is your opinion on people dating online through a social network?"
Carmen watched intently as Shane sat up and began to talk, she tell she was uncomfortable.
"People can date who they like. Uh, I don't think it's none of anyone else's business how they go about doing it."
"Hear hear. What about you, does the Chart ever influence your love life at all? I mean, I'm sure many people out there are looking for love. Do you recommend the chart as a short cut? What are your thoughts on the concept of love?"
The audience fell silent, and Shane felt her palms start to sweat.
"All, I can say is that, once people find love, no matter how hard, or stressful, or scary the situation- They should, uh, never let it go. It's one of those things that's rare between people, and if,", she hesistated,
Carmen was now on her feet by the camera man and watching the screen, holding her breath.
What are you doing to yourself Carmen?
"…and if you don't take risks, then, you might as well be dead."
Carmen suddenly felt a rush of anger and her eyes fill with salty tears, and stared past the monitor and looked straight at her, the woman who ripped her heart out and left her to fix it on her own.
Ellen announced for a commercial and the studio was soon filled with casual chatter.
Alice bit her lip and looked into the audience, who looked adoringly at the set, enjoying themselves. Her eyes cast down to the camera crew. Shane looked at her watch, how much longer?
"Oh my God."
Shane looked at Alice,
"What?"
Shane looked to the side of the stage at the camera crew and her heart skipped a beat.
Carmen froze as her eyes locked onto Shane's.
What on earth would she do now.