Title: Never Say Never
Rating: K+
Type: AU-ish
Status: Complete
Word Count: 518
Disclaimer: I don't own
Summary: Why was she hugging him?
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She was touching him.
She was touching him.
The pretty pink haired medic from Konoha was touching him, the very monster that had tried to kill her as gennin.
Flabbergasted he looked down at Sakura with slightly dilated eyes.
He didn't understand.
He said he would protect Naruto. And he did. No more, no less.
Why was she crying?
Why was she hugging him?
She was sobbing on his shoulder blade, and he could feel her every breath, her every tear. Her hands clutched his shirt and held him so tightly. Almost as if she needed him. And he wanted to believe so badly that he alone was all she wanted, needed ….
The screaming of a hospital patient made the Kazekage blink and come back to his senses. This was not right. Any person who was sane would never want him.
No.
Not him.
Never him.
Her arms were tight around his rib cage and he could feel the warmth of her body on his. It was nothing like he'd ever imagined. He felt estranged from himself, claustrophobic even.
Breathing was too laborious and harsh.
It was awkward, alien, and worst of all unrestrained on her part.
What was going on?
Touch is affection. Something he'd never been exposed to. He simply could not understand the concept. And now, now he was conflicted.
What was he supposed to do?
He knew that he was supposed to comfort her. He was supposed to raise his arms and touch her, hug her back. He had learned this from acute study in the past, but he had the urge to throw her off him all the same. Only he could never touch her much less harm her.
Not her.
He clenched his fists and stiffened his arms even more as they lay useless at his sides. He had no right to touch her. She is the precious friend of his only friend, an acquaintance by association. No more than that but undeniably important nonetheless.
But she was leaning more of her weight on him, clutching to his leather straps, and whispering "Gaara…" in breathy sobs against his neck.
He tensed.
Human contact is something he's been wanting fiercely ever since he was a child. And now that he was on the receiving end he was wholly apprehensive.
Touch is love. And she was touching him of her own will ….
No, he could never think that. Angry with himself he furred his brows a bit. He was not delusional; he was not a lovable person. A hollow and deprived man who had never felt the warmth of kindness would always be a monster. He was nothing more than a tool that fought a losing battle for sanity. Such a piteous creature could never garner or even deserve the affections of this unusual woman.
"Gaara…"
He was beginning to shake from the tension. If only he could get her off of him. Her weight against his was starting to feel even better than the feel of fresh blood being splattered across his face. It was so warm.
"Thank you so much…"
She was always so emotional, so nice. Even to him, especially to him. Everything about her is strange.
"I… I don't know what I would have done if it weren't for you" she strangled out in a tight and quick voice.
She is dangerous.
He needed to leave. It was too hard to breath and his whole body was on the verge of teleporting thousands of leagues away. Adrenaline and pure unadulterated panic began to stream into every part of his being. He was feeling every pulsation of his heart beat, and his breathes became even more haggard.
He had to escape from this. It was too much.
As he was preparing a transport jutsu Sakura unexpectedly whispered harshly "Don't leave me alone! Please! I don't know what to do!"
He could feel her scorching tears slide down his neck.
Eyes dilated while he stared down at the kunoichi and moved his arms around the shaking woman.
She wanted him so stay. She wanted him.
It was horrifying. It was impossible. It was a lie and it felt so good.
To be needed. To be wanted.
It was ecstasy.
His arms were starting to shake from the rush of emotion. But he had to hold her tighter. Closer. He needed this to be real, because this female, this Sakura, was everything he'd ever wanted. He was never going to let her go after this.
Never.