Worth the Trouble
childofspacegypsy1
xxxxxx
Startled, Jen looked up into Ronon's dark eyes and immediately answered without even thinking. "I was wrong."
Jen's head quickly caught up with her mouth. Crap.
Speaking of mouths, Ronon's was curling up at the edges as he moved to close the space between them.
Heart pounding, Jennifer watched in fascination as he leaned closer, or was it her?
The kiss was gentle, and short lived.
"Jennifer?" Teyla's soft voice suddenly spoke into her ear.
Snapping away from Ronon, Jennifer reached up to activate her earpiece. "Y…Yes? Go ahead Teyla."
"Is everything alright?" Teyla's calm voice held a touch of concern.
"Oh. Oh, yes. You just startled me." Jen cut her eyes over to where Ronon sat unmoving, watching her. "It's just very…quiet out here. Are you ready for me to return Torren to you?"
Chuckling softly to herself at the doctor's jittery disposition, Teyla responded. "Yes. Would you like for me to come and get him?"
"NO!" At Ronon's amused grin, Jennifer fixed him with a glare. "I…pphhh. It's just that I am out on a balcony and need to go by my room and get his bag and things. I may as well bring him to you."
"Of course. I am here now, so whenever you are ready just bring him."
"Aright. We'll see you in a few minutes." Clicking her ear piece, Jen ended the conversation.
Carefully settling the baby into the crook of her arm, Jen braced her other hand on the floor of the balcony, but before she could move to rise, two strong arms wrapped around her middle and lifted her to her feet.
Pressed full length against Ronon's lean body, feeling the heat and strength in the fingers that gripped her waist, Jennifer fought to control the blush already staining her cheeks.
Her stomach in knots, she opened her mouth to speak but couldn't.
Taking one last look into Ronon's eyes, eyes that were begging her to say or do something, begging her not to walk away, again, she turned and left the balcony.
As Jennifer drifted slowly down the hall her silent litany of…Coward, stupid stupid coward… was broken off on a gasp as she heard Ronon's bellowed curse through the balcony doors.
On the balcony…
Ronon spun around to stand at the railing. Why did he have to keep doing this? Pursuing her when she had told him she wasn't interested.
She had lied, but still, he should have backed off.
Whatever it was that kept calling him back, was getting to her too. But she continued to skitter away at the last minute. If they didn't work this out it was going to drive them both crazy. Or it would drive him crazy and he would drag her with him for spite.
He had never had so much trouble with a woman. Courting her hadn't worked. Backing off trying not to pressure her hadn't worked. What the hell else was he supposed to do?
Maybe he just needed to realize nothing was going to work, because this wasn't meant to be.
xxxxxx
With Torren on her hip and his bag on the opposite shoulder, Jen left her room heading for the transporter. Minutes later and she was handing the sleepy baby and his bag to Teyla.
"Would you like to come in?" Just as mysterious as her ability to sense the wraith, Teyla's ability to sense a person's need to talk was at times a blessing and a curse.
Eyeing the now sleeping baby in his mother's arms, Jennifer hated to intrude. "Are you sure?"
"Come on in Jennifer. If you don't Teyla will pout for a week that she wasn't given the chance to play physiatrist-slash-matchmaker…" The deep disembodied voice coming from the bathroom was cut off by Teyla's indignant interruption.
"John Sheppard you will pay for that remark. Jennifer, I just want you to feel comfortable talking to me…if you wish to."
"Okay." Jennifer quickly stepped into the room before she lost her nerve.
Caught completely by surprise at the doctor's sudden compliance, Teyla blinked and met John's equally puzzled gaze as he came to lean in the bathroom doorway. "Well, why don't you start by telling me what it is you wish to talk about?"
"Ronon." John's eyebrows went up at Jennifer's disgruntled reply.
"And McKay." Jen added quietly.
"And me." At this last confession, Teyla's eyes widened.
Biting her lip, Jen sat on the edge of the bed. "I told myself I had feelings for Rodney. I told Ronon I wasn't interested."
Teyla thought about this for a moment before asking, "Do you have feelings for Rodney?"
"I did, I do…I don't." Jennifer picked forlornly at invisible lint on her pants.
"I see." Considering this and giving Jennifer a moment to think, Teyla waited before asking her next question. "And are you not interested in Ronon?"
"No, I wasn't. I'm not…I am." Suddenly standing, Jen held her hands over her burning cheeks. "I'm sorry. I should go. It's late and I shouldn't be here bothering you with my childish insecurities."
"Can I ask you something Jennifer?" Having kept quiet up till now, John wasn't sure how much Jennifer would appreciate his butting in.
"Okay."
"If you're interested in Ronon, why won't you at least give a relationship with him a chance? I mean, you gave a relationship with Rodney a chance and you weren't even as interested in him."
"I guess, when I think about it, it's that Ronon and I don't add up. It just doesn't make sense. With all our differences..." Her voice faded with a shake of her head.
Teyla met John's eyes over Jennifer's shoulder and smiled softly. "Jennifer, very few things in life make perfect sense, Love most especially. But more importantly," Teyla shifted her gaze to meet Jen's intently, "you will never know until you try."
xxxxxx
After checking Teyla's room, Jennifer's room and a number of balconies, Ronon decided he would just have to wait until tomorrow to track Jen down. Knowing he needed to settle his mind before he would get any sleep, Ronon headed to the gym for a short workout. He never expected to find her there.
Just inside the doors of the gym, Jen stood staring into the room with her arms wrapped around her waist.
Stopping just behind her left shoulder, Ronon looked down at the side of her face. "Hey."
"Hey." Jennifer looked up at Ronon then turning her face back to the room, let her arms drop and turned to leave. "I guess you want to actually use the gym, instead of staring at it like an idiot."
Ronon gently grabbed her upper arm and spun Jen to face him. "I'd rather talk…to you."
Taking the slight nod of her head as her answer, Ronon turned them to walk down the hall, away from the gym. "What were you thinking so hard about back there?"
"Hm?" Jennifer looked over at Ronon as they continued navigating the halls. "Oh. Well, I was thinking about my self defense training. Sometimes it still surprises me that I am now capable of at least giving myself a fighting chance. But I think until recently I overlooked a really important lesson from that experience."
Turning to look at Jen, he quirked a brow in question.
"As Teyla pointed out to me earlier, some things are worth taking a chance on, but that I'll never know unless I try."
It took Ronon a minute to realize that they had stopped and were standing in the middle of a hallway staring into each others eyes. "Your room or mine?"
"What!?"
Smiling down at the blushing woman, Ronon clarified, "To talk, would you be more comfortable talking in your room or mine? What did you think I meant?"
"Nothing. It doesn't matter to me." Jen was blushing furiously and just wanted to change the subject and move on.
With a knowing grin, Ronon grasped Jennifer's hand and motioned up the hall with his free hand. "Mine's right up there, if that's okay?"
"Sure."
xxxxxx
Leaning against the wall just inside his room, Ronon watched Jennifer turn a complete circle looking his room over.
Too used to finding him watching her to be unnerved by his intense stare, Jennifer smiled at the familiar stance.
Ronon stepped away from the wall and came to stand an arm's length from her. "Jennifer…"
"I know. I'm really sorry Ronon. I know I haven't been fair to you, saying one thing and doing the opposite instead of just talking to you but…" Jen bit her lip unable to voice her fears.
"But you thought if you talked to me about your fears it would make me realize the differences too, and that I would decide you were too much trouble to bother with."
Jennifer realized how badly she had handled this, never stopping to consider that Ronon would have thought this through as well. Because he was just as unsure as she was, and he was risking just as much.
How could she ask him for another chance now?
Seeing the sad look on her face, Ronon reached out and pulled her to him, wrapping his arms around her shoulders, relieved when she relaxed into the embrace.
His hand wrapped loosely in her long hair, Ronon tilted Jen's head back so he was looking down at her face. "I definitely think you are worth the trouble Jennifer."
Relaxing as she realized that she was going to get that second chance, Jennifer smiled mysteriously up at him. "I know I am. Now I just have to decide if you are, worth the trouble that is."
The hand at the small of her back to pressed Jen closer as he tightened the hand in her hair slightly and grinned wickedly down at her, his eyes promising to prove just how worth any trouble he could be.
The End