A.N. Not much to say other than The End. Yes this is actually the last chapter. Thanks to everyone who's reviewed and thanks to everyone who I've ranted to about how I have writers block and how I'm stuck and that type of stuff.

Disclaimer: I only own Kiara. But I guess she's gone now : (

Ziva didn't know what to do with herself. Gibb's had forced her to go home, not letting any of his team stay at the office but Ziva would have been better with something to do because now all that she could think about was Kiara. The face she had given Ziva when she handed her to the Social Services lady. Despair, she made her little girl feel despair. All the grief was building and she finally pulled herself up from the couch where she had been sitting since she got home and changed into clothes she could run in. Sometimes it was better if she couldn't feel.

She opened the front door and ran straight into someone. Tony. She didn't want to see Tony; she didn't want to see anyone, only Kiara. Only Kiara. She pushed past him, ignoring his calls of Ziva and just as she was about to leave her yard, she was grabbed by her wrist and without thinking she turned around and flipped Tony over so he landed with a bang on his back, his arm held painfully over his head. Oops. She really needed to not feel right now. Why didn't he let her run?

"Sorry Tony." She said in a dead voice, letting his arm go once she realised what she had done to her friend, walking inside knowing full well that Tony would follow. Maybe he could help, maybe he could help take the emptiness away. Running had put her on auto-pilot. She was dangerous on auto-pilot. Especially when her head was in such a mess.

Tony knew that now wasn't the time to joke. He knew that at this moment he needed to be the best friend he was and just comfort her, hold her, fix her. He walked over and sat down on the couch where they had been eating pizza without a care the night before. Was it only a night ago? It felt like a lifetime.

He reached out and moved her head gently so she was staring right at him.
"Ziva."
That was all it took. She completely broke down sobbing almost hysterically into his jacket. One part of him was glad that she could trust him enough to show this side of her, the side that was stuffed up beyond recognition, the side of her she usually kept locked up; but the other half of him was devastatingly sad that she was feeling this screwed up that she would break down in front of him. Ziva didn't break down in front of anyone. But this case had hit home. Tali, Kiara. The line was blurred in Ziva's head; they were both so much alike and no matter how hard she tried, no matter how many times she screamed in her head that it was weak, she couldn't stop crying. Couldn't stop breaking.

It wasn't very often that Tony shut up and let people cry but for Ziva he would. He would do anything for Ziva. Especially when she was hurting like this. He held her until she finally stopped crying, asleep. So exhausted from all the events from the past few days and from sleepless nights from the past few years.

Tony carefully carried her into her bedroom, laying her down on top of the covers, trying his best not to wake her but she did anyway. It was proof at how tired she was that she only woke up as he laid her down.

"Goodnight Ziva." He whispered from the door. The darkness making him unable to see her clearly, only a dark shape entangled in a mass of quilt.

"Stay." She whispered. So quiet Tony wasn't sure if she had actually said it. "Please stay."

There was no denying it now, and there was no way he could say no while her voice and heart were breaking like this; so he pulled off his shoes and crawled in next to her, stroking her hair like he had while she was crying. He knew this would never happen again and he wasn't sure if that was a good thing or a really, really bad thing. All he knew was that at the moment, with Ziva in his arms he felt right. He felt warm and happy in a way one-night stands couldn't replace and breathing in the smell of her hair which fanned behind her, slightly tickling his face but he didn't mind. Tonight wasn't about him, it was about Ziva and being the partner and friend she needed. Being Tony the way she needed.

She was back on the roof-top. She saw Ari, she couldn't stop him. Bang. One.
She was in Israel, watching Ari kill her mother, watching her get beaten over and over. Bang. Two.
She was in the main shopping street of Israel watching her sister get blown up in slow motion. Bang. Three.
She was in Abby's lab trying to pull Ari away. Bang. Four.
She was at her front door, getting McGee to move, not quickly enough though. Bang. Five.
She was in Autopsy trying to warn Ducky and Palmer. Bang. Six. Bang. Seven.
She was in her favourite car, a red mini with Jenny, trying to yell and tell her. Bang. Eight.
She was in her lounge room, watching James Bond. Screaming, not at the movie but because she had seen this before she knew what was going to happen. Bang. Nine. She leant over; trying to mop up the blood, cover the hole but failing then grabbing hold of Tony, pulling herself impossibly close to his lifeless form. Then he came alive, leaning over her, the blood from the hole in his head dripping sickeningly onto her face.

"Look Ziva, I'm okay, I'm fine. Shh. Calm down, it's all okay."

And then she wasn't in her lounge room but her bedroom and Tony's head no longer had a hole in it, there were no bloodstains clouding her eyes.

"It's okay Ziva." He whispered, rubbing her back. "It was just a dream, I'm here now. It's okay."

She sat up straight. Sweat covered her body and she had been moaning and mumbling through the dream but she didn't scream and she didn't wake up yelling everyone's names or hating herself for letting them all die. Tony couldn't take away the nightmares, no one could. But he could make them better; he could slowly pull her out of the water she was drowning in.

-

Tony was woken from a peaceful sleep by a loud buzzing noise. He reached over to turn off his alarm but his arm hit something else.

"OW!" Oh yeah, Ziva. He had forgotten for a split second but now it hot him with full force. He had known from stake-outs, undercover missions and their old movie nights that she was a restless sleeper but last night had scared him. She had started just moving around, Tony didn't realise anything was wrong. When she started whimpering he started to worry and picked up stroking her hair, hoping it would calm her down but it didn't. Once she started talking and nearly crying, he sat up and pulled her into her lap, rubbing her back and murmuring comforting words to her but that only seemed to make her worse. He was about to wake her up quickly when she did so herself her eyes wide and frightened like she was expecting someone else above her, not Tony. Little did he know it was exactly the opposite. After that it had taken her a bit to get to sleep but Tony waited until he was sure Ziva wouldn't wake up like she did before he went to sleep. At least she hadn't been screaming like Kiara had said she heard. He didn't know if he'd be able to cope seeing her so scared.

He had found the one thing Ziva was scared of. Her memories.

He picked up the buzzing phone knowing who it would be.

"Hello?" He answered.

"DiNozzo. Get your ass to the office, if given you a bit of time but you have filing to do." Gibbs's voice was tired but not as much as yesterday. Everyone was slowly mending themselves. "Tell Ziva she doesn't have to come in until 12:00."

"How did you know I was with her Boss?" Tony asked, surprise evident in his voice, even over the phone.

"If it was my partner I'd be there too. I want you here at 0930 at the latest. Make sure you're not late." And with that he hung up.

"What did Gibbs want?" A sleepy voice asked from next to Tony.

"Nothing from you until 12:00. Go back to sleep for a few hours, make sure you're not late or Gibbs will have my head."

She let out a sleepy chuckle before rolling over a going back to sleep. Hopefully one without the terrifying nightmares.

-

"Ahh, Sleeping Beauty finally arrives!" Tony joked as Ziva walked into the bull-pen looking as sleepy as she had that morning. Maybe she hadn't gotten any more sleep after all of that.

She looked up at him for a brief second a ghost of a smile on her face but then she dropped her eyes and continued on to her desk.

"How are you holding up Ziva?" Gibbs asked, leaning down so his blue eyes were level with her brown ones.

She didn't have to answer, he could see the craziness in her eyes and the dark circles under them but the smile she gave him contradicted all of that.

"I'll get there Gibbs." Was her reply. Maybe she was going to be okay after all. He was also going to have to talk her and DiNozzo about rule number 12 but for now she needed to heal and Tony was the only one who could do that.

Ziva went about doing her paperwork on auto-pilot. Tuning out everything around, her eyes and shoulders sore from sitting at the computer for too long. She was trying to find a runaway piece of paper when she fell upon something.

It was a picture, carefully drawn in coloured pencil. It showed two people standing under a blue sky with a big yellow sun and next to a tree and a bush. The two people had big smiles on their faces and they were holding hands and above them were two words in bright purple childish script that Ziva knew she would never forget.

Kiara Ziva