Mitchie came out of her room twice that day after her shower. Once, because she had been fantasizing about that apple since she had set it on that damn counter, and the next because Mrs. Gray had made flank steak, something even Shane and Holy Harlem couldn't keep her away from.
Mitchie came down to set the table at 5:30, just like she had done since she could remember to find a perfectly set table. What. The. Hell.
"Hey, Mitchie…where have you been? I was kinda hoping to get to know you today, you know?" Harlem popped through the connecting kitchen doorway, toting a bunch of cups, which she placed at everyone's place…and an extra one which was obviously for her.
"Oh, sorry, I had no idea! I was just super busy…with my…summer homework? I was just super absorbed with the book. You know how it is." Mitchie managed to piece together a reasonable excuse. She couldn't exactly say, "Oh, well I was just super busy moping around about you and your boyfriend's relationship and how my life was super perfect until around the time you showed up. Weird."
"Well, how about we sit next to each other at dinner, then? I placed you right here." Harlem said as a couple more household members trickled in, each piled high with plates and bowls of steak, salad, strawberries, and every green vegetable Mitchie's mother could get a hold of.
Mitchie almost shat a brick as Harlem began to sit down. In Mitchie's spot. This table had always had a special order, with both Fathers at the head of the table, their wives on their rights, Mitchie, and Nate on the side closest to the kitchen and the wall, and Shane and Jason on the other side where a chair could be pulled up next to them, reserved for guests.
Mitchie begrudgedly sat down at her "assigned seat", and then Shane breezed into the room, and sat down at his usual place.
"Shane, baby, I was hoping you'd sit by me, over here?" came from Harlem's evil little mouth.
Mrs. Gray turned her head from the conversation she was having in the doorway to give Harlem a surprised look. Shane slowly got up from his seat and very, very slowly made his way to the other side of the table, where he slumped into his chair with a tad of a scowl. Harlem just looked at him with a pretty little smile, and he sat a little straighter, and gave her a little smile and a nudge back.
Everyone else fumbled their way into their seats and sat, preparing for grace. Mitchie and Nate shared a glance across the table while everyone grabbing hands for grace, relaying their mutual disdain for the new table places.
Five minutes into the awkward conversations, Nate kept complaining about how Jason chewed his food, and when he wasn't he was yelling across the table to Mitchie, only to be yelled over by the adults also trying to communicate. Shane and Harlem were lost in their own little world, feeding each other and earning repulsive looks from Mitchie, Jason, and Nate.
Four minutes into The Dinner From Hell, Mitchie's phone vibrated in her back pocket. Figuring her mother and Mrs. Gray were arguing over which vegetable was most nutritious, she flipped her phone open sideways, so that she could use her keyboard, and read the text from NATE:
"This sucks. I miss u."
Mitchie smirked, before catching his eye and then texting back:
" Chinese firedrill? ;D"
Barely thirty seconds later, Nick texted back:
"I'm tellin Shane & Jason, doing it at 7:42 precise."
Sure enough, exactly three minutes later, the Mitchie and the boys exchanged glances, and then bolted from their seats, all screaming something about fires and Asians and ran out of the room.
The parents didn't even seem to notice, but Harlem sat at the table scared shitless, staring at the doorway where they had exited. But she didn't have long to wait, because they were all back within ten seconds, sitting in random new places, and then continued to eat off each others' plates, like nothing had ever happened.
The minute Mitchie got up the courage to ask Shane to give her back her plate, Harlem squawked in her squeaky little voice, "Shane, can we please go have a talk for a second? Now? " There was no question in her voice, though. She was pissed.
Shane glanced up at her with his mouth stuffed full (he was using Mitchie's fork, but he couldn't stand to be in the same room with her more than once a day? Asshole).
They quietly left the room, and everyone still in the dining room went silent, ready to hear all the juicy drama.
"Well, what was I supposed to think, Shane! I was sitting alone with you and that girl's family, who hate my guts, and you leave the room to frolic about with your ex-girlfriend? What the hell!"
Excuse me, that girl?! Mitchie couldn't help but think.
"They don't hate you! And I wasn't frolicking around with my ex-girlfriend, Nate and Jason were with us for the whole ten seconds, which you just told me you knew because you realized you were at the table by yourself! It was just a joke, Harlem. Please, let it go."
"I'll let it go when you realize it was stupid, and immature, and you were clearly not thinking about how I would feel about this. I'm telling your family goodbye, and then I'm leaving. I can't even stand being in the same room as you right now."
Nobody even pretended to be in a conversation when Harlem came back into the room. She let a dazzling smile take a hold of her face, and said loudly, "Thank you guys so much for having me, the food was delicious" Oh, yes. That lettuce leaf and broccoli stem looked so appetizing, Mitchie thought, "But I have to be leaving, I have a prior commitment I just remembered about. Thanks again though, nice meeting you!"
Shane gave Mitchie a death glare, and quickly followed the retreating Harlem's footsteps.
Mitchie also stood up from her place, and followed them. Shane and Harlem were whispering an argument at the door when Mitchie caught up.
"Hey, Harlem. Can I talk to you in private for just a second?" Mitchie asked.
Both Shane and Harlem's eyes widened drastically, and Shane stepped back to let Mitchie and Harlem have some privacy on the porch. Mitchie shut the door behind her, and crossed her arms to the chilly Colorado air that gently whispered around her bare shoulders.
"Listen, Harlem, I know that you're angry with Shane for the Chinese Firedrill thing, but I promise you it wasn't his fault. I thought it up, so you don't have to leave, or be angry with him. Everyone in there is really disappointed to see you go so soon." Mitchie was lying through her teeth about half of this crap, but she didn't need Shane angry with her for something so stupid.
Harlem and Mitchie each sat down on a huge wooden rocking chair, and Harlem let out a big gush of air before saying, "It's okay, Mitchie. I know that he didn't think of it, he's not the sharpest tool in the shed. I just don't like how immature he can act sometimes. What's he going to be like when we have kids, you know? It's time to grow up!"
Did she insult his intelligence?Hah! Wait… Kids? Grow up? KIDS?
"Uhhh…yeah…um… Kids?" Mitchie managed to sputter.
"Well, this is the longest I've ever dated a boy, and we're seventeen, after all. I mean, now's as good a time as any to start getting ready for a family. We graduate next year, and then college, but college isn't as important to me as starting a family. And Shane knows that so he needs to stop acting like a teenager and start acting like a husband!" Harlem burst out, panting by the end of her rant.
"Wow. Okay, Harlem. I'm sorry about Shane…acting like a teenager. Really. I just wanted to make sure you knew it wasn't his idea. But I need to get back inside, so I'll see you soon, right?" Mitchie was already making her way towards the door, trying to get away from the crazy girlfriend who was starting to remind her of Kate from Jon and Kate + 8. You know, the crazy, crazy, crazy one.
"Yeah, thanks anyway for that. If I don't run into you sometime this week, I'll see you at Camp on Monday!"
Mitchie froze. She spun around slowly, one hand on the door.
"Camp? You mean, you're also…working there?"
"Yeah, that's actually how Shane and I met each other, last year. I'm a lifeguard, I chaperone the kids around the lake."
Of course she's a life guard. It's not like she would work in the kitchen or something.
"Okay, well I really, really have to go. Bye Harlem!" Mitchie quickly shut the door behind her, barely hearing Harlem's goodbye through the slamming of the door. She didn't even consider going back into the dining room, she just walked back up to her room, closing the door softly.
She laid on her bed for two hours, trying to process everything Harlem had unveiled tonight. One, Harlem was crazy, if you couldn't figure that one out yourself. Two, they would be spending a lot of time at the very least seeing each other, if not actually spending time together. Well, Harlem, Mitchie, and Shane. Lovely. And Three, Camp had ended last summer before Mitchie and Shane had their…fight…, so how long had he been talking to Harlem. Had he been planning to break up with her anyway? As she thought through all of this, she finally let her mind wander back to that night, where everything had changed.