HOW TO BE.....(HEHE JOKE).....EMMETT!

Disclaimer- Gwennii OMCCAEAMCAEMCAMJWH and Clozzer Cake OMEAMC

*OMEAMC(RP)AJB(TL)AF* Do not own any of the Gorgeous Twilight characters or Twilight for that matter, the best writer on the earth Stephenie Meyer does.

MWAHAHAHAHAHAH- MY FOURTH FANFIC MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAH. luv u xx

Set at anytime, but Nessie is not born and Bella is still human.

I've decided to put another review up straight away after a review from a very eager reader :). Thank-You

Chapter 4- Dieting Needs.

EmmettPOV.

Oww! My face feels like..... it was punched by a really angry, and possibly overly horny vampire. Which it was.

I've just realised..... the readers don't know what to eat! But how to get around the complication of mentioning i'm a vampire.......? I GOT IT! I'll put metaphorically (of course) that i'm a vampire. I will mention the ups and downs of consuming blood, and what is the best tasting animal. Quick,Quick! Block thoughts! Edward is here.

"Emmett, why are you blocking your thoughts by singing 'American Idiot' by Green Day?"

"Oh,umm...er I was thinking about Rosalie...."

"Thank God for Green Day!" And with that he left the room. Okay chapter 4 here I come!

Chapter 4 Dieting Needs

Just for the fun of it, I'm gunna give you the diet of vampire! Because i'm a stupid person. ( a/n teehee, we all know what Emmett really is.)

I'm a cute vampire, and I only drink the blood of animals. We don't want to be monsters ( Emmett says: See, I can be serious and emotional)

The best thing to eat is a ginormous grizzly bear! The best bears usually have ginormous butts,so always go for the fatties!

When you get too full, the best thing to do is run around in circles for hours. Get a can of energy drink and shove it down Alice's throat. She will join you in your circular marathon.

After drinking all that blood, you may have excess energy........this is where Rosalie comes in.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH! (Mental laugh, I am being guarded by Carlisle....thats a different story)

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Review again please!

Thank-You

Gwennii

P.S can people please check out my partner's stories :)

OMEAMC

Once again Thank-you