House Elf, a new species
Summary: Where did Yoda and his kind come from? What happens when Dobby takes Harry too literally and tries to leave the planet? Nothing but humour, I hope.
A/N: Don't flame me for any grammar mistakes in this story. While there might be a few that I didn't mean to, most of them are on purpose. I tried to get Yoda's speech as best as I could and the same goes for how the house elves speak.
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Privet Drive
"Master Harry Potter sir," Dobby called as soon as he popped into the bedroom. "Dobby has taken care of everything Master Harry Potter wanted Dobby to do. Does Master Harry Potter sir wish Dobby to do anything else?"
Looking up from his book, Harry could only stare in disbelief as he took in Dobby's appearance. He had told Dobby to find something to wear that went together instead of his mismatched clothes. It seems he wasn't as clear as he thought he was.
"Dobby," he slowly said. "What are you wearing?"
"Dobby did exactly as Master Harry Potter sir said," Dobby beamed. "Dobby looked all over and couldn't find anything that looked good enough. As Dobby was thinking, a big animal went buy. It was huge and had these two horns that blew smoke and a large black mouth. It was as long as a baby dragon."
"A dragon in Muggle London?" Harry mused to himself. "Can't be."
"Behind it was following all these other animals. They went into this big tent and Dobby thought they might have something to help Dobby. Inside the tent, Dobby found clothes. Big ones and small ones. Well, Dobby figured that since they had so many, they wouldn't miss one pair."
Dobby robbed a circus, Harry thought to himself. It does explain why he looks like a clown. "Okay, that's good. I suppose."
"What does Master Harry Potter sir want Dobby to do now?"
Feeling a headache coming on, he could only bang his head against the book he was reading. He had hoped that it would take Dobby longer to find something to wear. "Uh, Dobby? I'm kind of busy right now and need some time to go over this.
"Master…"
Thinking quickly, "I want out of here. Out of Privet Drive and away from the Dursleys."
"What can Dobby do?" the little elf asked as he wrung his hat.
"You can find me a way off this planet," Harry said with a triumphant look on his face. That should keep him busy for a bit. There's no way he will find a way.
"Dobby will do as Master Harry Potter says," Dobby saluted before popping away.
"That was easier than I thought," Harry said before turning back to his book.
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Hogwarts
"What is Dobby doing," Winky asked as she watched him run around while muttering.
"Master Harry Potter sir asked Dobby to do something and Dobby can figure out how to do it. Dobby is a bad elf."
"Then Dobby should do what little master always does. He should ask the bushy one."
"Winky is right. Dobby will do that," he said before popping away.
"Dobby is crazy," she muttered to herself.
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Hermione was currently going over her homework for the third time when Dobby popped in.
"Dobby needs Master Harry Potter sirs friend help," Dobby said as he hopped from one foot to another.
Looking at the old elf, she said, "I can try. What is it you need?"
"How does one going about getting off the planet?"
Thinking the question was off, she answered nevertheless. "The muggles use a space ship to leave the planet and visit space. They…"
"Are there other places out there? Grand places for Great Wizards?"
"Uh, there might be far away. There are none in the general area of this planet."
"Where do you find a space ship?"
"Well, the best place would probably be in the United States. Their space program is the most advanced. Let me check the book though." After she managed to find the correct one and check the correct chapter, she said. "Yes, it is in the United States. More specifically, in Cape Canaveral."
"Thank you Master Harry Potter sirs friend," he said before popping away.
"I wonder why he wanted to know that," she mused. "Unless Harry wanted…no, he wouldn't do that. Would he?"
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Cape Canaveral, Florida
Two weeks later
"Why is Winky here for," she asked as she looked around. "Why must I help?"
"Because Dobby needs help and Winky is the best one to help," he said as he looked at the controls."
"Well, what is Dobby going to do about the muggles up front?" she asked. "They can't stay here."
"Once the muggles start the ship, we pop them back to the ground. Then we find a place for Master Harry Potter sir to live."
"Winky thinks this is a bad idea."
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Mission Control
"Sir, the astronauts appear to be on the ground," a monitor technician said.
"Who's flying the ship then?"
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Ship
"The ship is going too slow," Dobby said as he looked out the window. "Dobby will never find a new home for Master Harry Potter sir. We use magic on ship to make it go faster."
"No Dobby," she cried. She knew that magic didn't work right with muggle stuff like this. She had thrown away plenty of the stuff at Hogwarts that the students had brought and thrown away after it broke. Feeling the ship speed up, she said, "Never mind."
"This is fun," he said as he looked out another window. "Dobby will find a new home for…"
"Are we supposed to be heading for a big rock," Winky asked as she tried to curl up in her seat.
"That's easy," he said. "We just pop the ship to the other side." Snapping his fingers, the ship disappeared right before it crashed into the asteroid. Though where it re-appeared was not behind the asteroid.
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A galaxy far, far away
"Dobby, where are we," Winky asked as she looked around. "We didn't pop back where we were supposed to."
"Dobby doesn't know. Dobby thinks we are far from home. Dobby…"
"Ow," Dobby said as he rubbed his head. "Why did Winky hit Dobby?'
"This is all your fault. Magic does not work with muggles stuff. Magic…"
"Look a planet. It might be nice place for Master Harry Potter sir."
"I don't think we have a choice," Winky said as she noticed as the ship heading for the planet. "I think the ship is crashing."
"That's easy," Dobby said before dodging Winky.
"No more popping the ship. We pop down to the planet."
"But the ship…"
"Ship can burn. We will pop to the planet."
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Dagobah
"Dobby doesn't know what to do," he said as he looked around. Dobby can't pop home. We are too far."
Shaking her head, she said, "We make home here until help comes. Then we go home,"
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Dagobah
Many years later
"Master, are you sure this is the place. I can feel the force here, but I can't feel a force user."
"Yes Padawan, this is the place. You need to open your senses."
"Yes master…"
"What is it?"
"Over there. In the bushes."
"Hello, we come from the Jedi Order. We mean you no harm. May we approach?"
"Approach, you may," the voice said.
Approaching the unknown being, they saw that it was small and green with pointed ears. "We were sent here by our master to find a force user to take back to our temple and train."
"I'll come," the being said. "Let me gather a few things."
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Privet Drive
"Dobby," Harry called for the third time. It had been four days since he had seen the little elf. "Where can he have gone?"
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Dagobah
"Mother, leave I am to train," he said as he popped into the small adobe.
"What do you mean, Yoda? You can't leave. We are still trying to build a castle for the young master."
"Leave I must," Yoda said. "Out there lies my destiny is."
"Yoda," she started to say before he popped away. Turning to Dobby, "This is all your fault."
Looking up, he said, "Dobby never talk that way. Winky at fault here. Yoda was always a strange one. Maybe we can have a daughter. She might not be so strange."
Huffing in annoyance, she said, "If so, I get to name her. Yoda? What kind of name was that? That probably was why he was so odd."
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Many years later
"Mother, two ships landed they have. Wish to go I do."
Shaking her head, "Yaddle is like her brother. Very well, Yaddle can go."
They watched as she popped away and could only wonder where they went wrong.
"Dobby didn't choose the name this time," he defended.
"Winky thinks it's time to leave. Castle keeps on falling apart on this planet, I think we should take the other ship and leave."
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"Dobby, why are you heading for that black hole in space?"
"Dobby can't control ship with magic anymore. Ship is being pulled into it no matter what Dobby do."
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Dagobah
Many, many years earlier
"That was not fun," Winky said as she looked around. "Big hole brought us back here."
"Feels funny," Dobby said. "Time not the same. Well, back to the planet. And I get to name our next one."
"Do not," she argued. "You bad influence."
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Years later
"Vander, come here," Winky yelled. "Dobby has found a new ship to get us off this planet. I knows that you be like yours brother and sister. We will drop you off on the first planet we find. The others wish to stay here."
"Feels thankful Vander does," the other elf said.
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Dantooine
"Farewell this be," Vander said to his parents. "Luck I wish you in finding your home."
Dobby and Winky could only cry as they watched one of their children head off towards the nearest city in hopes of being like his elder siblings.
"Can we get home," Winky asked as she blew her nose.
Nodding his head. "Dobby has asked the men in funny robes who act like wizards how to get home. They told Dobby how to. We only be gone from home for several days even."
"Good," she nodded. "Let's go."
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Earth
Five days after they left Earth
"Master Harry Potter sir," Dobby said as he popped into the room. "Dobby has done as Master Harry Potter sir says. He has found a way off the planet for him."
Looking at Dobby in shock, he said, "Um, that's nice. How did you do it?"
Beaming. "At first Dobby was confused. The Dobby went to Winky who said what does you do when you need help. That was when Dobby went to the Bushy One."
Bushy one, Harry thought to himself. Oh, Hermione. She'll love that one.
"Bushy one gave Dobby idea how to help Master Harry Potter sir. Dobby and Winky left the planet for many years and only recently came back."
"I…"
"BOY!" Vernon roared from the den. "Get down here now and explain what this thing is outside."
Looking out his window he could only stare in shock as he spotted what could only be a space ship. That or his potion ingredients leaked again and he was suffering another hallucination.
"Dobby, think you want to go back out there again?" Harry asked as he thought how he was going to explain this. Forget the Ministry and Aurors. He was going to have the army after him.
"Yes Master Harry Potter sir. Winky already has gathered everything we need. You can even pick out which planet you wish to live on. They also have wizards out there who let House Elves use magic as they wish."
"Let's go," Harry said as he grabbed his trunk.
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A/N: Just had this idea and wanted to see where I could take it. I might write some more of it. If I do, next time it will focus more on Harry instead of Dobby.