Lenalee hitched her breath when he walked out with his new haircut (production of the last harsh battle): now it emphasized his scar, messy in adorable way, and that roughness of the cut--his silky locks now stuck out everywhere in different directions--showed he wasn't the same tidy, polite Allen. He was still a man and sweet-talker, but there was something hidden deep, far in his eyes.
He was a very good actor, indeed.
Nothing. Nothing changed in him after those fourteenth thingy, not even a single milli of his smile shrunk, not even his all-innocent actions gone. Nevertheless, his eyes determined, focused, and... scared.
No. Maybe it was not fear she saw in his eyes. Allen...
...was sad.
Why didn't he show them everything? His despair, his sorrow, his anger... That mask of his was just too much for a facade. Lenalee was certain she never saw someone could put such persona while he was so dark--and pure at the same time. His burden... If she were to have his fate, would she stay strong for her friends? Would she just eat like nothing ever happened? Would she just burst a carefree laugh when a lousy joke was thrown?
Lenalee couldn't say which one she liked better, the old sugarcoated Allen or the new one. The gray man (he was worth a man after everything he has been through) standing several feet in front of her was a mature version of the one she met long time ago. Back then he was so free and teen and pats on his snowy head would be the best way to thank him (just like a cute puppy) but now it would be a wine for him above the table, fist greeting on his broad shoulder to tell him he was the man.
His jaw defined, his muscles sharpened, and his back widened.
She liked the way he talked now--without those honorifics--because it made her felt closer to him. He was so far right now that she couldn't reach out for him; there was always an invisible wall surrounded him and that blood-like fire dancing twirling around him. Even though she was on his arms, protected and loved, their body pressed against each other, so near that she could lick his sweat off his firm neck, smell his scent mixed with rust (blood! she screamed silently) and tiredness; she still couldn't find Allen.
Perhaps he did that so no one knew he was putting more distance.
Was he afraid that he would harm them? He would destroy ones he loved the most?
It wasn't that Lenalee full of herself that she thought she was one of his beloved (she blushed at the thinking); of course, there were people better than her to take that place. Still, whoever she was to him, he wouldn't hurt her in any way.
Well, he would if he kept his reborn confidence. If she didn't know him well, she would judge him as a Casanova.
He was too good at manipulating. No one could deceive people the way he did--and look at how much burden he got! People all depended on him! And she... from the first place, as the nuisance of the group, she had been grabbing his sleeves for safety.
His smile melted people he wanted to be his comrades. He got some serious back-ups if he wanted to say 'help'. They would be there for him, sure, but he never called anyone for it.
Fourteenth.
"If the time comes, please kill me," his crispy voice echoed, fresh on her ears. "But... it won't happen that way. If the Fourteenth tries to attack the order--" which Lenalee damn believed he would not, "I'll stop him. You'll see."
And Allen would not be alone when the time really came. She was there. Everyone would be there.
Allen was gonna make it for sure.
Ah, and he was hotter with his new hair.
---
Disclaimer: Don't own D. Gray-Man.
A.N.: This is my very first D. Gray-Man fic. I've been downloading all volumes this week and found this manga is very interesting and sweet. True it is rather cliché when the heroine of the story carried the biggest burden, but well, that's the lovely point!
I downloaded Soul Eater too, I have read it until the fourth volume, and I still couldn't find the charm. Wonder why it ranked high on onemanga.
To the R, to the E, to the V, to the I, to the E, to the W. You know what I mean. And constructive criticism, suggestions, and corrections are highly appreciated. I deeply apologize for typos and… Soul Eater fan. Peace, bro c:
© fitha