It all Slips
Author's Note: This was a piece I had in my mind when watching Lisbon break down in the previous episode. It's a bit AU, at least, I think so, but I enjoyed writing it.
It didn't take her long to admit there were definite advantages to having him on the team. He made the chemistry just flourish. Ignoring all flowery terms aside, Teresa Lisbon knew that Jane had probably been the best addition to the team since she had started heading it. But she refused to admit that he might be more than just the best friend partner in tackling crime guy that he was. That was her way – she blocked things out when they might threaten her well-being or her sanity. She didn't want to be crazy over anything. Sure, she said people drove her crazy. But she didn't want to admit that she might feel more than a tiny radius of emotions. Because there was a difference between being mentally insane by keeping everything inside and letting someone feel too much. So Lisbon decided on the first.
After all, keeping everything in, like nothing was wrong was easier to fake. She had become an expert in hiding every single emotion that might compromise the image she had built up since her abusive father had started his rampages.
And now... now her subconscious was fighting with the active part of her brain, telling her that those feelings were most definitely there and she needed to do something. One part of her brain told her "Squash them!" and the other half said "Act on them!" Lisbon did neither.
She knew she needed to do something but then again, she was very content with what was going on right now. But was she? Was this some sort of trick that her mind was playing her? Was she really happy or was she thinking of an alternate world – a world that could be – that she was stuck in and therefore only happy there? Merlin she hated psychology.
"Lisbon you're zoning again." Jane's voice brought her back to reality – that she had a case to solve. No, that they had a case to solve.
"No I wasn't." She was quicker than to admit that she might be thinking of the possibilities that her mind was letting her realize something she wasn't going to admit: that she liked him.
"Yes, you were. But never mind, VanPelt wants us to come take a look at something at the crime scene." He turned to leave and she thought she was safe. But then a thought seemed to cross his mind "What were you thinking about?"
"You." She blurted before the proper, secret-loving side of her brain could take over. Instantly she realized her mistake and slapped her head with her hand.
Jane raised an eyebrow. "Me? Whatever for?" He teased, his eyes dancing and Lisbon knew she was going to have to be a genius to work this one out for the best.
"Thinking about how you've been with our team for awhile now and I still haven't killed you. I'm surprised at myself."
"Ah." He seemed to have dropped it so Lisbon let out a sigh of relief. "But that's not what you were thinking."
"Shut up Jane. VanPelt needs us."
And on that note – that mysterious, let's dance around the issue way, was how she ended another day at the CBI headquarters.
AN: Thanks everyone for reading. Hope you enjoyed! Reviews are appreciated but never required.