23) Plot fake mutiny with Breda, Havoc and Falman.
"Okay, so this is what we'll do…" whispered Tasha. She looked around the circle of twenty-five year old men and held up one finger.
"First, we're going to drive him completely insane by meeting each other here, and draw obvious plans to get his gloves. Next, we're going to have a look of panic on our faces whenever he addresses us directly. Thirdly-"
Havoc interrupted. "How about we call you boss and grin at each other whenever he's in the room? Like we're going to jump him?"
Tasha paused. "That's not a bad idea." She instructed them on how to look as guilty and sullen as possible. "Slouch and mutter what he's gonna think are obscenities. Don't look him in the eyes. Get into the character of an unhappy subordinate."
Breda slouched, muttered, and avoided Mustang. "I think I'll pursue a career in acting." He breathed.
Havoc tried very hard not to laugh. Breda resembled a toad when he tried grimacing.
---
"Hawkeye?"
"Yes, Colonel?" answered Riza.
"The men are looking at each other. Suspiciously."
Riza sighed. She knew her boss was getting mentally cracked because of the strain of having Tasha around, but this was simply going too far. The walls were weird but the men were so far uncontaminated.
"Look, Colonel, if the men happen to like that sort of thing, they are fully-" she was cut off by Roy striding down the aisle and fixing a stare on Falman. Tasha and the others groaned inwardly. Falman couldn't lie for dog biscuits.
"Warrant Officer Falman, what are you and my other subordinates doing?" Roy growled, a manic gleam in his eye. In an almost heroic effort, Falman looked at Tasha and then Roy with blind panic on his face and stuttered, "N-nothing, sir. W-We were j-just betting whe-when Havoc was going t-to lose his n-newest girlfriend."
Roy looked a little disappointed and skeptical. He walked out and got back to his desk; almost missing Falman whisper to Tasha, "So what do we do now, boss?"
Tasha grinned.
"We need to draw up jobs for everyone."
24) Exclude Fuery because he's too innocent.
"What about me?" asked Fuery. His ignorance and youth and damned cuteness shone through his face like a beacon.
In the face of such purity, the corrupt ones stared blankly at him.
"Too innocent." They chorused.
Fuery's eyes watered and filled as he looked up at them pleadingly.
"Please…?" he quavered.
The corrupt ones stood no chance. They invited him in their plot to fake mutiny.
25) Take over Fuery's station and put in a country-wide broadcast that Roy has overthrown the Fuhrer.
"Hey, Tasha…" said Fuery.
"Yes?" she asked.
"I'm just thinking…isn't this a lot like real mutiny? We're framing Colonel Mustang and I think that-"
Tasha cut him off. "Who's the boss here? Me. Who's the person with the plan? Me. Who has omnipotent and godlike powers?"
Fuery sighed. "You."
Tasha grinned in reply and made him put in the broadcast; Soon the nation of Amestris was in pandemonium. It just so happened to be the day the Führer took off without telling anyone where he went. The Authoress hid her plot device behind her back and whistled innocently.
Mobs broke out onto the street, women and children locked themselves into the rooms, able men barricaded the door with furniture; shops closed and there was a Central-wide police force searching for Roy Mustang. Central Headquarters was searched and turned inside-out in order to find either the Führer or Roy.
Roy Mustang was apprehended in a bakery store and brought to trial. It was just and even-minded. Kind of like how the sky happens to be bright orange and pigs fly.
26) A few hours later, say 'Just kidding!'
"Tasha-Lu-you-bitch-" ground out Mustang, someone's boot crushing his head.
"I'm so sorry, what was that? A confession?" asked the officer. He bent down and let his bad breath wash over Roy's face.
"Oh, you wait, buddy boy. There's going to be so much in store for you in prison." The officer grinned nastily, giving Roy even more incentive to kill Tasha.
Just then the radio crackled and a cheery female voice chirped- "Calling all Amestrians! Radios on, everyone! Turns out that Roy didn't overthrow the Führer! He's safe and sound! Right, Führer?"
"Yes, I'm sorry about the confusion." The Führer's smooth voice took over. "I apologize for the inconvenience. Roy's completely innocent, it seems...I do hope no one was inconvenienced by my sudden holiday. This young lady here…"
The officer- a lowly Lt. Colonel-paled as Roy stood up and yanked on his gloves.
"L-listen, sir, this is all a big misunderstanding-" he stammered. Roy's eyes sparked dangerously and he brought his fingers together.
There was one less Lt. Colonel in Amestris that day.
27) Persuade the Fuhrer for you to become Fuhrer for the day. (I apologize if this wasn't entirely clear…)
"Please, Führer? It'll be worth your time, I promise." begged Tasha. She looked at him in supplication.
"Depends. Do you know I'm a homunculus?" he asked bluntly.
"Yup. Won't breathe a word of it to anyone. So can I be Führer for a day? I won't do anything too outrageous." She asked, brushing aside the fact that the ruler of a country was an UNGODLY MONSTER OUT OF HIS MIND-no, wait, that's Stalin. Carry on, please.
Tasha glared at the authoress' unsavory joke about Russian Dictators and turned her rapt attention back to trying to con the Führer out of his job.
The Führer himself was looking a little astonished by the fact he'd been brushed off so easily. He got over it and laughed good-naturedly.
"You're a likely young lady. Okay then, go ahead. This will be interesting." he remarked. He launched into a speech about the Führer's jobs and mission statement. She twiddled her fingers and replied, "Uh-huh, sure, as long as I get the job" in the pauses provided. In the end the Führer gave up and let her wear the honorary mustache.
That's right. The Führer has fake mustaches.
Here we are; that'll make your reading a little better. I should've waited a bit and edited and added more stuff but yesterday I got excited and tapped it all down because the inspiration bug hates it when I'm idle and doing homework.