Fic: After the Storm
Rating: M
Characters: Edward/Jasper, Esme, Carlisle, Jane, Alec, Felix, Bonnie, Jimmy, Ashley, Alice
Pairings: Edward/Jasper
Chapter Title: Wake Up Call
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. Summit and Stephenie Meyer do, no money being made off this. This story mine. Characters of Twilight and associated - not mine. OC characters Jimmy Oaks, Bonnie Simmons, Ashley Jameson - all mine. Don't sue.
Summary: A self-confessed, vampire-obsessed man, Jasper Whitlock comes across one such being one dark, stormy night. The vampire, Edward Cullen, affects his life in such a way that Jasper has to decide what he is willing to do for life and love. AU,E/J,dark
Please Note: Dark Edward, Dark Jasper, M-rated for violence, other graphic content and use of crude language.
Again, thanks to my wonderful ladies who pre-read, beta, grammar-nazi and give general feedback on everything! rhenea5018, KuroiBlackNightingale and vampthenewblack I don't know what I would do without you all!
Chapter 12: Wake up Call
"Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; but remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for." ~ Epicurus
His body is burning...
Jasper's body arches, trying to escape the pain.
He isn't sure just what he had expected, but he is sure as hell that this is not it. The pain - the pain is beyond anything he could ever have imagined. There is tearing: of his soul, of his heart, as every emotion he has ever encountered floods through his mind, body and soul. Prepared he was for pain; unprepared is he for the devastation of his mental capacity, his psyche, intellect and innermost self; for the desecration of every memory he has held dear as the change affects him in ways more than physical. Acutely, Jasper recognises his sensitivity will be his accursed affliction for the rest of his days and he screams in anguish at this unjust persecution.
Cool fingers touch his hand and he can hear Edward whispering, "I'm sorry," before more emotions flood through him; conflicted, tormented, tortured, and he knows without a doubt that it is Edward's agitation that he is feeling.
He just wants it to stop, but he can only scream as the venom flows through his system, forcing his human blood to change. Bones grind and crack, knitting themselves together within his frame into straighter, stronger forms; muscles tighten and strengthen. As the hours of night pass by, Jasper fades in and out of concious thought, succumbing to the agonisingly-crippling pain as his body knits itself together into the supreme version of himself.
Pain.
Where he had expected a slight sting of Edward's teeth piercing into his skin followed by a pleasant release of blood into his lover's mouth; in actuality it is a painful, excruciating experience as the razor-sharp teeth tear at his flesh and the ice-cold venom invades his bloodstream. It is a cold that is so pervasive, so glacial in temperature that it burns inside his warm, human body and that burning chill infiltrates every gland, organ, and cell of him, consuming him with its wintry brand.
In the depths of his mind, Jasper thinks hazily, 'Death might truly be preferable to this.'
With staggering clarity, memories unfurl and stream frenziedly through his brain, and with a startling sign that fate has finally caught up with him, the images trigger every emotion known to him thus far. Feelings long-dormant rise up, threatening to overwhelm him; the sense of feeling abandoned; of feeling alone... Bright white-hot sparks of desolation and plaintiveness flicker intermittently between the flashes of imagery, each individual historical moment bringing its own brand of emotional persecution along with it.
Alice - her beautiful cherub face smiling at him, coffee-coloured curls waving gently in the summer breeze; the accompanying ache in his chest as he stares at her face in his mind's eye.
His father - berating him; ranting about patriotic duty; waving him off as he rode away to join the rest of the boys going off to war... and the accompanying feeling of being cut loose in a world he does not understand, nor knows how to live in.
His mother - a warm smile, a hand that brushes back his hair as he nuzzles closely against her warm skin, breathing in her familiar scent as she comforts his tortured soul - no longer here to offer advice and he relives the loss of her comforting presence with tortured gasps.
Ashley - the boy who tormented him; now a man who lies dead upon his rug... Jasper feels no remorse about his actions and worry eats at him for he thinks that he should.
Bonnie - his hands curl in remembrance of her breath again his palm, of feeling her pain and agony of trying to draw breath against his palm; of her expiring against his skin...
Edward - the remembered pain of realising that Edward had left him, of needing his vampire man at his side and the knowledge that Edward had left...
"No, no, no! Edward!" Jasper screams, unaware of the pressure against his arms as he thrashes about, unaware of Edward's eyes full of pain as he holds Jasper down against the bed...
Newer memories come: of falling in love, of feeling love, of getting that which he finally deserves...
* Jimmy - earnest brown eyes that stare at him, that beautiful mouth declaring his love before capturing his own in a stormy heartfelt kiss;
* Edward - the water sleeting off his lithesome figure; the silent, but deadly stalk of his lover's body sauntering towards him; the incredible sweet taste that is all Edward;
* Carlisle - eyes pleading with him to run, run and take Edward far, far away
Dimly, Jasper is aware of the passage of time. Light shines weakly through the window as the sun slowly breaks over the horizon. He can feel the pinpricks of light lightly kissing his skin making him cognisant of his nerves' growing sensitivity. Still, it is fleeting and as much as he tries, he cannot differentiate beyond night and day. Hours fly by; hours where he has a sense of being avidly watched, of feeling an irritation of sorts, animosity, resentment, and a growing sense of impatience. He can feel resignation, nausea, and... with a sudden understanding of the feeling, Jasper comprehends that he can feel an uncomfortable need to urinate.
Concious of his human tiredness fleeing and being replaced with a heightened perceptiveness of the world around him, Jasper is fascinated with the feelings and emotions being fed into him by the people in the room.
Before he can dwell further on his ability to absorb the mental and emotional state of those around him, frosty venom sluggishly worms its way further into his body, sinking into every organ with pain-filled intensity and just when he thinks it's at its most unbearable, the torment is pushed up a notch as the final organ in his body dies. The excruciating pain of his heart stopping is unlike any thing he experienced previously, likening it to someone taking a short sharp knife and stabbing him continuously with it until his breath expires. Thousands of ice-hot pinpricks shoot through his last major organ. He arches high off the bed, the only sound leaving his throat a single, long, anguish-laden scream.
Silence.
A momentary absence of sound.
Except...
He feels the onslaught of the pain and torment of a tortured soul, both the rush of anticipation and the sense of dread from several directions - this confuses him for how can he experience both exhilaration and dread? He is bombarded with desire, want, fear, and most of all, love.
He takes a breath...
And wrinkles his nose at the multitude of smells that assail him; dank sweat, the smell of urine and vomit, and overlying them all; the almost palpable stench of fear.
He takes another breath, this time almost hesitantly....
And is overwhelmed by the sweetest smell he has ever encountered in his young life. Venom floods his mouth like saliva, rendering Jasper momentarily speechless as the burn in his throat grows stronger. With a growl he leaps up in one single, fluid motion...
And encounters the form of Edward.
He growls deep in the back of throat at this vampire in front of him, barely recognising his Edward before him.
"Jasper, stop."
Ignoring the vampire, he closes his eyes and sniffs the air, trying to find the origin of that sweet, mouth-watering scent. He turns and unerringly, focuses on the young human still bound in his chair. "Jimmy..." The growl that rises from his chest comes unbidden and before he can move, Edward is holding him tightly against his chest. He struggles against the bonds, his want to escape them strong, then the creeping sense of familiarity comes, the sweeping knowledge that he knows this embrace. Edward. He stops struggling, but not before he notices that the embrace is no longer cold, that Edward is no longer cool to him. Instead his embrace is warm and Jasper pauses in momentary confusion, closing his eyes as he tries to work out this anomaly.
Suddenly, Jasper is aware of a myriad of sounds reaching his ears: the chafing of individual leaves against one another; the creak of every limb as it gently moves with the wind; the scuffing of the blades of grass together: all these previously minuscule sounds reaching his now perfect and perceptive ears.
Slowly opening his eyes, he is stunned by the riotous colour that pervades his senses, the walls sparkling, almost moving in the brilliant brightness of candlelight. Almost negligently, he notices it is dark outside as he turns his head to stare at the gently bobbing flame nearest him and is amazed by the intensity of each part of the flame; the azure blue of the hottest centre, the outer reds and oranges, coolly paling to the yellow and white. Marvelling at this discovery, he turns to look at Edward.
Jasper stops at the incredible beauty of the man before him. Where his human eyes had once looked and found this man to be handsome, his vampire sight allows to see the true beauty of vampires. Reaching out towards Edward's face with his hand, he is distracted by the glow of candlelight hitting his skin, turning it from a plain white to a myriad of colours perceptible only to his newly acquired, penetrating and sharp eyesight.
Awareness floods through him as he feels the coolness of the floor against one foot, the roughness of the rug beneath the other and the minute debris in the air kissing his sensitised nerves, causing little shocks to travel through him as the air circulates around him. Edward's arm smooths his naked back, and he can feel the rise and fall of his mate's chest with every breath brushing against his own erect nipples, and a thrill runs through him as every minuscule touch seems like a sensuous caress.
Leaning his head back, he revels in this new perception of the world, the aliveness of simply being aware.
"It is beautiful, Jasper."
Opening his eyes, he sees Edward's trained upon him and he smiles shyly, knowing that Edward can hear this incredible experience through him.
"Thank you, Edward. This is... this is simply astounding. There is nothing that can prepare you for this. It is simply put: amazing."
"As are you, Jasper. You... before, you were a fascinating complex man, handsome and glorious. Now, you are simply breathtaking. You ought to see yourself, Jasper Whitlock. As a vampire, you are stunning."
Edward is floored by the changes in his Jasper. Tucking an errant strand behind the blond's ear, he takes in the chiselled, more finished-features of his mate's face; the more enticing, lusher waves of silky-looking hair upon his head, begging Edward's fingers to run through them. Curling his fingers tightly against this silent call, he instead smooths his knuckles against Jasper's cheek, unfurling his fingers to curve lightly against the side of Jasper's neck, feeling the human fragility replaced by the smooth, silent strength of marble-like skin beneath the pads of his fingertips as his mate leans into his touch. Delightful.
"Edward..." Jasper breathes and Edward's hold tightens slightly against his lover's skin as the man's cool breath wafts somewhat becomingly over his wrist. He snorts silently. Who was he fooling? It was beyond becomingly. It is heavenly. Breathing deeply, Edward makes a concerted effort to concentrate on his task at hand. But it is not easy as Jasper... half-naked Jasper... freshly-turned, vampire man Jasper... his Jasper brushes against him, sliding skin against skin, grazing strands of silken hair against his jaw, his scent - still inherently Jasper - rising up to linger in Edward's nostrils...
The sensory overload on Edward's senses encourages a multitude of non-platonic thoughts to stream effortlessly through his head. Gathering the newborn vampire into his arms, he pushes him up against the wall, his hands cradling Jasper's hips as the man wraps his legs around him. Edward's foraging mouth claims Jasper's, soliciting a response from his lover; one that is hot, ardent and altogether too easy to get lost in.
Wrenching himself away from the temptation that is Jasper's mouth, Edward pauses, trying to regain his bearings. 'Come on, Edward. He is one of us now.' The monster is back and Edward tries to keep him at bay, but the monster is not willing to be pushed away. 'Do it, Edward. Make him one of us. He needs to feed. And we need the distraction of Jimmy gone.' Thumbing the man's full lips, Edward knows the monster is resolute. A little of Edward dies inside as he forces himself to carry on with his plan; he is ruthless, he is a killer. 'Yes, yes you are,' purrs the monster in his head.
Slowly, he releases Jasper, feeling the man's leg slide sensually against him, drawing a groan from his lips. Pushing the man hard against the wall only makes him desperately aware of the hardened erection pressing against his own. Without volition, his hips grinds into Jasper's rhythmically as he speaks, "But first Jasper, Jimmy has to go. Free Jimmy from here, Jasper." His purposefully hoarsely whispered words have the desired effect and Jasper stills.
"Edward?"
"Jasper, those vampires out there do not care if he lives or dies. He is just food. He will undergo a slow and painful death. Kill him now. Put him out of his misery and do not let them have him. You will be thwarting them if you do it first. Do it Jasper. You need to feed and what better way to feed than to use Jimmy? You will be saving him at the same time."
"Edward!"
"Do it!" Painfully, he grinds harder against his Jasper. 'Please,' he begs silently.
"I can't!"
Edward pulls roughly away, and keenly notes the silent following of his lover's hips towards his own. Frowning hard, he glares at his Jasper. "Do you want him to be torn apart? Because that is what they will do to him. If you do this, do this for Jimmy's sake, for it will be the most altruistic thing you will ever do."
Unable to meet Jasper's accusatory eyes, he pulls him close and buries his nose into the sweetness of his neck. He hates his monster. He doesn't want Jasper to become like him. Lowly, he urges, "Please Jasper, you must! If you cannot, I will do so."
"Do you need me to do this, Edward?" Feeling his mate pull away, Edward swallows hard as he lifts his head. He nods, unable to voice a single word. A small glance is exchanged before Jasper turns towards the man still tied in his chair. Together they ignore Jimmy's whimpering and muffled pleas.
Edward watches as his lover walks hesitantly over to his stable hand, his steps slow and unsure. He can hear Jasper's thoughts, the willingness to do whatever Edward desires, wants, but above that, the hunger of a newborn vampire. He can also hear the pleas, the prayers that the lone human says in the vaults of his mind and something in him churns with compassion. After all, this is the man that loves his mate too.
The young, dark-haired boy looks up at the man he once revered as he approaches; the stalker like stance, the smooth easy gait of his silent approach; and pleads with his eyes.
Gliding silently across the room, Jasper steels himself for his task. With shaking hands, and a mild ache in his chest, Jasper grasps his stable hand's head between his palms and looks him straight in the eye.
"Thank you for your service," he says simply before with one fluid motion he cranes the man's neck to the side and fastens his mouth upon his neck. Biting down, Jasper feels his teeth pierce the man's skin, tastes the hot, moistness of his blood and he drinks extensively until he feels Jimmy still...
And Jasper knows he has silenced this young boy forever.
"Well done, Jasper."
A hand touches his shoulder as Jasper slowly releases his hold on Jimmy. Laying the man down carefully, Jasper moves the young man's hands to rest quietly upon his chest. "Be well," he says softly before rising and turning into the arms of his vampire.
Laying his face in Edward's palm, Jasper sighs deeply. Regret flows through him; succumbing to the eloquent manipulation of his mate for life does not make for a happy Jasper. There are some things that he will do for this man, but he does not relish the idea of supplication by manipulation.
Resignedly, Jasper understands that Edward is barely a boy turned man, that his emotions are simply still too young to fully comprehend what has just happened. Conceding to Edward's request meant consenting to a need to supplicate to his man, a need that Jasper would always feel, but there is an edge of resentment at Edward's use of it. Burying it deep, he hides it from Edward, reciting his favourite passage from Virgil in his thoughts, 'It is easy to go down into Hell; night and day, the gates of dark Death stand wide; but to climb back again, to retrace one's steps to the upper air - there's the rub, the task.'
Forcing himself to relax in the man's embrace, he sighs deeply.
"Jasper? I believe I can guess your thoughts at this moment."
'Oh Edward, I think not,' thinks Jasper as he continues to silently recite Virgil's passages.
"Are you all right?" Concern written upon his face, Edward queries Jasper softly. "This is for the best, you do understand that, do you not? He would have met the most undesirable end, should you have left him to the others."
Keeping his head firmly against his lover's chest, Jasper peers upward, staring into the pale face of Edward Cullen. "I did it solely for your benefit. I did not desire to see you feast on Jimmy. I understand that you have to feed, but that boy needed it done by someone who cared about him. I suspect that your jealousy would have hindered a peaceful death."
His eyes cloud over and with a tightness to his voice, Edward replies somewhat stiltedly, "Perhaps."
Giving Edward a final squeeze, Jasper pulls back. "Let's go outside," he says softly. "I really miss the wind on my face, the air is stale in here. Not to mention, I suspect that running as a vampire will be far more exhilarating than I could ever imagine. Take me, Edward. Take me outside. Show me what it's truly like."
The curl of Edward's lips into the boyish grin saddens Jasper as it cements his suspicions. Edward is just a boy, still trying to grow into a man. He grasps the hand that is offered by his lover, and together, they leave the room, but not before Jasper gives it a single, forlorn, backwards glance.
Edward eyes Jasper critically as they stand outside in the light of day. "It won't matter now that you forgot your hat," he states cryptically.
Jasper shrugs, and starts walking away. The journey to the front door had been rife with incidents, from the pulling off of door knobs to the imprint left on the banister as Jasper grasped it, unmindful of his newly acquired strength. Frustrated, he is eager to be away from the house, from the dead body that was Jimmy, but he stops as a memory comes to his mind.
"You forgot your hat."
With a startled look back at Edward, he recalls that similar moment a few days after Edward's arrival.
And the events that followed soon thereafter...
They both smile at the shared memory. When Edward reaches his side, a little flutter is felt in Jasper's chest as Edward grasps his hand lightly before tugging him forward. And like that time before, he relishes in the feeling of being both outdoors and with Edward as they walk. But unlike that time before, he is sure of this man's intentions towards him. He glances back at the house, its large windows looming, and again, Jasper realises how stifling it had become. He reflects that he might have to leave this house soon, for the memories and secrets tied to it are more suffocating in their burden, than in any joy that they might bring.
They pause once more at the crest of the hill before the land slopes towards the edge of the lake, gazing upon the scenery before them. However Jasper can now appreciate the lushiness of his land, the greenery that surrounds his property, the openess of the fields, and the sparkle of the lake's deep waters shining in the crystalline light of the sun.
And as they stand there, thundering steps against the ground shock Jasper and he winces at the loudness, frantic to find the source. It is thunderous to his ears, and with some surprise, he finds he can feel the rumble through the earth at his feet.
'What on earth? Is it an earthquake?' he wonders.
A distinct scent comes to him and he follows both scent and sound to its source. His eyes are wide when he realises that it is only his beloved horses... running in newly built corral? When did they get there? He distinctly recalls having placed them back in their stalls.
"It has been three days, Jasper," comes the soft tone of Edward in answer to his silent question. He shrugs, a small movement that is endearing in its boyish uncomfortableness. "I could not - in good conscience - leave them be. I built this and released them here so as to let them roam as they had neither you nor Jimmy to exercise them. And I felt that it was the least I could do, given the circumstances."
Grateful at the thoughtfulness, Jasper carefully notes away yet another point in Edward's favour.
"Thank you," he says simply. "I was a little startled at the rumbling I could feel through the ground. I was somewhat unprepared for that." Sensing the need, Jasper changes the subject, "Is everything always so... startlingly different at first?" He gesticulates wildly, his gestures conveying the overwhelming feelings that currently barrage him. "I feel as if I have been rebirthed into a world that I thought I knew, but have only just become aware of the wondrous nature of everything around me."
"I don't know, Jasper. I've only done it the once, myself," comes the wry reply and Jasper prepares to flush in embarrassment but comes to the realisation that as a vampire, this will no longer happen.
He grins, in spite of himself, at this revelation and it gives a lightness to his emotions. Teasingly, he asks, "You have no compassion for my newness that you must mock me at this moment?"
"I have compassion aplenty, my dear Jasper, for you behold - not the strangeness that you see - but the wonder of the world seen through fresh eyes. I see it through your thoughts and it is stupendous in its wonder. You are bewitching me anew."
"I had not realised that I had bewitched you at all," he replies to Edward's flustering, impassioned speech. The intensity of Edward's answer flusters Jasper. He bites his lips, torn between grasping his handsome man and kissing the bejesus out of them, and taking it slowly, one step at a time. He opts for the latter. It is all so new and there is much to take in. He does not want to rush anything, now they have eternity on their side. He spies a glint of water in his periphery and makes a snap decision.
Jasper starts to walk backwards, enticing the other vampire to follow. "Come, Edward, I wish to visit the lake. I wish to see for myself what the water is like to my new eyes!"
"Oh I daresay, you will appreciate it infinitely," comes the dry reply. "I know I desire most ardently to take you back into the lake. So yes, let's go back. "
The mental images caused by Edward's words scoot through his mind at a rapid pace. They are sinful, wicked.... and infinitely pleasurable. Jasper sucks in his breath. Damn. He recalls the last time they were there. A slight hum rumbles through him as Jasper feels the amorous tension climbing deliciously through his body. He hears the hastily drawn breath from his lover as Jasper continues to pull him along, and throwing him a questioning glance, he observes that Edward's eyes seem to be glazed over. He shoots him the most lascivious of smirks that he can possibly give. "You peering into my thoughts again, Edward?"
"I don't have to. You fair scream them in my presence."
"I would rather scream your name," hints Jasper.
His lover smirks back. "I am not wholly opposed to the idea, Major Whitlock. Suffice to say, I would like to be most... present at that moment."
Jasper feels the thrill of sexual need pierce through his soul. Beside him, again his lover makes a strangled, inarticulate noise. Jasper frowns at him in surprise and consternation. Watching Edward carefully he observes the tension that roils off Edward's body in waves, but Jasper feels the want and desire - and coupled with his own - it is a lust laden wave of pure want.
"Do you - is that - oh dear God.... Jasper, do you feel... amorous? Right now? From those thoughts that run rampant through your mind right now?" Edward's voice is tight. Visibly, Edward seems tense, and when their eyes meet, it is Jasper's turn to suck in breath at the desire reflected in his hungry eyes.
"Yes," he answers simply, not quite understanding where this is leading to.
"Jasper, stop... thinking. Please. Fuck..." With a singular motion, Edward rushes toward him and thrusts his hands into Jasper's hair, both lips and tongue vying for entrance to his mouth. Weak at the knees as Edward's tongue swipes along and over his lips and slides deliciously into his waiting mouth, Jasper grasps Edward's shoulders, pulling himself closer to the thrusting body, and tasting tongue. His own hands rove in haste over Edward's body, touching fervently every place they can reach. Waves of unadulterated lust wash over him and Jasper finds himself upon the ground and his lover above him, mindlessly nipping, sucking at his skin whilst his hips thrust urgently, pushing Jasper into the ground.
When Edward moves to pull away, Jasper makes a noise of irritation and pushes his pelvis up to grind against his man.
His lover leans his forehead delicately against his own and Jasper can feel the wash of his hurried breathing against his skin, eliciting from Jasper a small moan of want, and the answering jerk of Edward's hips.
Weakly, Edward apologises, "I am so sorry, Jasper. I do not mean to grab you like so, like a mere belonging."
"I do not mind belonging to you," murmurs Jasper, craning his neck to lave lightly at the hollow beneath his lover's ear. "I just dislike it when you stop."
"Ah - oh god... Stop, Jasper."
Reluctantly relinquishing his mouth's claim on Edward, Jasper leans his head back. He stares at the almost-whimsical movement of the clouds in the azure sky above, and listens to Edward's murmur against his ear, "I certainly do not wish to frustrate you, Jasper. Please believe me."
Distractedly, Edward runs a hand through Jasper's hair in quiet desperation, lightly tugging at the ends before releasing the strands. Laughing softly, he adds, "You make me infinitely weak. I had not fully assimilated what that gift of yours would mean for me, for us."
Attempting to lighten the mood, Jasper asks, "Does everything you say have to have that edge to it?"
"What edge?"
"That sensual edge. Innuendo."
Frowning in confusion, Edward pulls back to look down at him. "If you regard it as being there, perhaps it is your perception and comprehension of my words?"
"So there was no chance that you were to impress an innuendo in any form upon me?"
"Aside from the worrisome thought that you might actually think I would dare impress such a thing upon you in such a manner, I must ask what dares you to ask such a thing of me?" Edward's jocular tone appeases Jasper's worry that Edward might have been truly affronted at his words.
"Evasion - interesting." Jasper gives him a teasing smirk.
"Evasion - a necessity," corrects Edward. He pauses, his lips pressing lightly against Jasper's cheek, "Dear God in heaven, that is a dangerous tool you have at your disposal. You need to wield that instrument most carefully."
"Why thank you, kind sir," mocks Jasper as he pushes his hips to slide against Edward, earning him another moan from his mate.
"Now who is laying on the innuendo?"
Jasper chuckles, "Well, suffice to say that several times in the course of knowing you, you have glibly laced innuendo in your words so I think I am safe to say that you do do it. And I learnt well from the master."
An impish grin upon his face at Jasper's words, clearing his throat Edward stands and bids him, "Come Jasper."
"Well I was heading that way until you stopped," complains Jasper bitterly under his breath. Nonetheless he takes hold of the hand that Edward offers and pulls himself to his feet. The scent of recent rain greets Jasper's nostrils as they melt into the cool loaminess of the forest, heading to the path that leads to south side of the lake.
Quotes:
'It is easy to go down into Hell; night and day, the gates of dark Death stand wide; but to climb back again, to retrace one's steps to the upper air - there's the rub, the task.' ~Virgil