I like writing stories in which characters find out the truth of how they feel about one another. Tea and Ready are two such stories.
Tea: Tea is similar to Warmth, just with Hikaru and Akira being a little older. It is through Hikaru's POV.
Disclaimer: Hikaru no Go is written by Yumi Hotta and the animated series was created by Studio Pierrot. Please do not construe the writing of this fanfiction as a claim to ownership in any way.
Tea
When Toya Akira appeared through the glass windows, Shindou Hikaru could see that he looked disturbed. His smile faded as Toya pushed the door open and walked out. Toya kept his eyes down and walked in a straight, determined line. He had a hand to his mouth with a Kleenex, and as he passed Hikaru, he sniffed. Concerned, Hikaru came forward quickly and grabbed him by the closest upper arm to stop him from walking away.
"Toya," he said. Startled, Toya spun around to face him. He gasped and covered the lower half of his face.
"Shindou!" he exclaimed. "Why are you here?"
"I wanted to pick you up…" Hikaru said. "…Go out to eat or something." Toya's eyes drifted downward and away from Hikaru.
"Oh…" he murmured. "I can't." He was talking funny. It might have been because of his hand, which was still over his mouth, but Hikaru was worried that it might have been because he was near tears.
"Why? Are you okay? I mean…I know you had an appointment. I wanted to keep you company, but you weren't home when I stopped by." Toya looked up towards his apartment complex three buildings down.
"Oh." Toya exhaled heavily and looked back at Hikaru.
"How did it go? You look upset."
"My appointment was yesterday…" Toya said. He was definitely talking funny. Hikaru winced at the fact that he'd gotten the day wrong.
"My bad…" he said.
"No, it's all right." Toya sighed again. "It's just…my mouth still hurts, but there's nothing that Iguchi-sensei can do about it short of numbing it again, and that's the absolute last thing I want."
"Do you want to talk about it? I mean, does it hurt to talk?"
"No, it doesn't," Toya said. "Well, it hurts in general, so…talking or not, I'm still in pain."
"Oh. What about when you eat?" Toya lowered the tissue and worked his jaw slightly.
"It hurts…more when I eat…" he said. "It's frustrating. I suppose it's just that…I have a sensitive mouth."
"Oh, that's too bad," Hikaru said. "C'mon. Let's go up to your place and hang out. Maybe having company will cheer you up."
"Maybe…" Hikaru smiled encouragingly and walked towards Toya. He bumped him to motivate him to walk, and Toya followed him around the corner towards his apartment building.
Hikaru was happy that he had run into Toya. The Toya family had been traveling during the month and was hardly ever in the area. Hikaru had become depressed and bored in Toya's absence and had tried to catch him as soon as the family had returned to Japan, but as it turned out, Toya had a busy schedule set upon his return and it spread their time apart even further.
They had been companions for nearly six years, but it was still an awkward thing for them to call each other. They had each other's numbers, but phone calls just weren't common between them. Hikaru had figured that it was just because they didn't have that type of friendship—they had one very particular thing in common and that was the basis of their relationship.
They were usually around each other enough to satiate their GO-centric needs, but lately, namely once Toya had been gone for weeks on end and Hikaru found himself bored and despondent, Hikaru started to feel as if he'd lost a part of himself, and once he'd thought that, many other questions and issues came to him. He began to wonder if Toya felt the same way. And he began to realize that there were many things that he didn't know about Toya because they didn't have the other type of friendship, the type that Hikaru desperately needed in order to fill what he was coming to call a "void" in his life.
"So…I've missed you lately," Hikaru said. Bracing himself against the chilly November wind, Toya frowned as he looked over to Hikaru.
"Have you?" he asked. "Why?"
"Because you were gone for forever," Hikaru said. "And things weren't the same without you around."
"I see…" They turned onto the stone walkway leading to the double doors of Toya's apartment building. "Well, I'm back now and we're going to…hang out. So…there." Toya reached into his pocket and took out his keys. Hikaru frowned at the lack of personality on the chain. It contained simply the keys that he used within the apartment building, and nothing more. Hikaru wondered whether or not Toya would use a keychain if Hikaru gave him one.
Inside, they walked to the mail room and Toya retrieved his mail. Then they walked to the elevator. Hikaru boarded first and pressed nine. Toya smiled at him pleasantly, as if he was a stranger that had held the door open for him.
"We're friends, Toya," Hikaru said. "Right?"
"Yes, of course." Toya covered his mouth again. "Why?" he asked.
"Well, just because… Well…" Hikaru sighed in frustration of not being able to find the right words. "I want to know that…you think of me as a friend."
"Of course I do."
"What do you think makes a friend a friend?"
"Well, bonding," Toya said simply. "We bond over GO."
"But don't you think…there has to be something else there, too."
"Such as?"
"Well…you know… Common interests and hanging out. Calling each other out of the blue just to chat, and stuff."
"You can call me if you'd like," Toya said. "There is never a bad time to discuss GO, Shindou." Hikaru gave Toya an odd look as the elevator door opened. Toya caught it on the way out. "W-what?" he asked. "What is that look for?"
"I want us to have something more in common than just GO," Hikaru said. He started walking, as Toya had stopped. After a moment of hesitation, Toya followed him.
"Such as…?" he asked, and he sounded as if he needed an example more than he wanted one.
"Like anything. Like games, or music or food."
"Well, our tastes run quite different, Shindou," Toya said. "In the years that I have known you, I have never been able to quite understand your odd tastes."
"I don't have odd tastes…" Hikaru said. Toya's expression showed his disagreement with the statement as he opened the door to his apartment. Hikaru had always preferred Toya's apartment to his own. Being that he came from money, he could afford to live on the pricier side of town. Everything was nicer there than at Hikaru's and that was Hikaru's only guess as to why Toya never came over.
"I'd like to think that you do." In the foyer, they switched from their outdoor shoes to their house shoes. Toya immediately went into the kitchen to prepare a snack. He had learned some time ago that Hikaru always expected to eat, and so he took the liberty of stocking and serving items that he knew that Hikaru would like. In the colder months, it was mainly cocoa and something sweet. Today, it was chocolate chip cookies.
Hikaru kneeled at Toya's mini kotatsu, which doubled as a dining room table. While the apartment was larger than Hikaru's, it was still cramped, and so the living room had to do double duty. Hikaru slipped his legs under the blanket of the kotatsu and faced the TV as he turned it on. Using the remote, he flipped through the basic channels. Toya never watched TV, and so he didn't have cable. That was one thing that Hikaru preferred about his own place over Toya's.
Toya, however, had decent heat and pricey food. It wasn't that Hikaru couldn't afford to eat well, it was mainly that he was bred to be frugal, and those habits stuck with him into his independent years. Toya knew the best of brands; he knew what to shop for and where to find his specialty items. Hikaru loved the taste of the rich cocoa and chewy cookies, but he could never find those brands in his own neighborhood.
Toya joined him with a humbled smile as he sat down the tray with the mugs of steaming cocoa and the platter of warmed cookies. Toya wasn't the biggest fan of sweets, and so he didn't always partake in eating them, but he usually drank the cocoa. Hikaru settled on a static-laden station that was airing an anime that he didn't recognize. He took a cookie and started to eat it while he let his cocoa cool. Toya reached over towards his futon and grabbed a book on GO strategies from the rack next to it. Afraid that Toya would bury himself in the book and ignore him, Hikaru quickly turned off the TV.
"Let's talk," he said, turning to face Toya. Startled, Toya lowered the book to the ground as if caught.
"What?" he asked.
"Let's chat for a bit. How was the trip?" Toya loosened up and smiled again.
"Well, it was just magnificent, Shindou," he said, shaking his head as if he couldn't believe how wonderful it had been. "Father and I encountered many pros from the different nations we visited and we played so many incredible games. You would have loved it, Shindou, I just know it."
"What else did you guys do?" Hikaru asked. "Did you take any pictures?"
"Certainly. Mother has most of them, however. She's making an album for the family. You must come over, Shindou, when it is completed. She and I did our fair share of sightseeing. The Louvre was grand." Hikaru smiled.
"What's that?" he asked. Toya's pleasant expression dipped, and he shook his head slightly.
"What is…what?" he asked.
"The Lou…whatever?" Hikaru asked. "What's that?"
"The Louvre?"
"Yeah."
"Why…it's only about the largest museum in the world, Shindou."
"Oh. That's cool," Hikaru said, nodding. "Must be really huge, then."
"Well, haven't you ever heard of it?" Toya asked.
"Probably," Hikaru said. "Probably I just forgot."
"Hm…" Toya drank some of the cocoa and winced. "Oh…" he murmured. He put his hand to his mouth again.
"Too hot?" Hikaru asked.
"Yes." Toya sat the mug down and touched his cheek. "I'm so sore. Iguchi-sensei was drilling into my tooth. Can you believe how barbaric dental practices are? To do such a thing, to drill so close to the root… It's simply barbaric."
"You have cavities?" Hikaru asked, shocked. As far as he knew, Toya was perfect.
"Just…one…" Toya admitted sheepishly.
"You?" Toya pursed his lips in shame.
"Yes," he said. "I could hardly believe it either. It just may be because of you, Shindou… I was never one for sweets until you came along. Always bringing chocolates and sweets as a host's gift. I can't refuse them…I have to eat them. And…they are…really good. Especially the ones with…the caramel and nuts. But they make my teeth hurt and that is why I have a cavity."
"You seem so ashamed to admit it," Hikaru said. "It's okay. People get cavities, Toya."
"Yes, but…I had always had such great oral health." Toya gave Hikaru a friendly glare. "You've been…a bad influence to me in more ways than one, Shindou-kun." Hikaru smirked.
"That's what friends are for," he said. He started on another cookie. "Okay, so now we know that we have cavities and sweets in common."
"You consider that a common interest?" Hikaru thought about it.
"Well, liking sweets is."
"I simply must cut back," Toya said. "Cavities are not good."
"They aren't death," Hikaru said.
"Bad oral hygiene can lead to an early death," Toya said, sounding serious.
"Really?" Toya nodded for emphasis.
"Most definitely." Hikaru let that fact sink in for a moment.
"But not one stinking cavity," he said. "So I wouldn't worry."
"Do you floss, Shindou?"
"No."
"You must. You have to brush at least twice a day and you must floss. Flossing prevents cavities."
"Didn't work for you…" Hikaru murmured. Toya gaped in a mild spurt of shock, and then closed his mouth. Probably, he'd realized that Hikaru's statement was true. Hikaru shrugged. "I used to floss, but I have sensitive gums."
"So do I," Toya said. "They have special toothpaste for people like ourselves." Hikaru looked at Toya and smirked.
"You're so prim and proper," he said, and then an odd idea occurred to him. He sat up straighter. "Hey, let's try something."
"Oh, I was hoping you would want to play GO," Toya said, clasping his hands together in anticipation. "Come. Let's—"
"Actually…it's not that…" Hikaru said and Toya's expression fell.
"No?" he asked. Hikaru couldn't help but smirk again.
"Nah. We can do that a little later."
"Well, what was it that you had in mind?"
"Let's switch places real quick." Toya's brow dipped. He started to rise, but stopped when Hikaru held his hands out to him.
"No, not— I mean let's pretend to be each other," he said. Toya's brow fell even further.
"What?" he asked.
"Come on, it'll be fun." Toya eyed him strangely.
"What…exactly would be the purpose?"
"You'll see." Hikaru sat up straighter and folded his hands neatly in front of him. "I'm you," he said. "My, this cocoa is rather delicious, isn't it, Shindou?" Toya stared at him.
"Why…are you pursing your lips like that? Do I do that?"
"Sometimes," Shindou said with a shrug. "Be me."
"O…Okay…" Toya let his shoulders fall and he rested back on his hands with his legs open.
"Yeah, it is good all right…" he said as nonchalantly as he could manage, which wasn't very nonchalant at all. Shindou chuckled and then got back into character.
"My, Paris was just lovely," he said, sticking his chin up slightly. "I just wished that you were there, Shindou."
"Well, maybe I'll go next time," Toya said, scratching his belly. "Ya know, and hang." Shindou laughed again.
"This is fun," he said. He cleared his throat. "You simply must, Shindou. It was ever so much fun." Toya gave him an odd look.
"Ever so much?" he asked. "Who talks like that? You are one in a million, Toya." Hikaru took a break in acting.
"Are you flattering yourself through me?" he asked. Toya broke character also, and sat properly.
"Well, I'm only saying what you would say. You compliment me randomly. It's just something that you do."
"Oh. I guess I didn't realize that." Toya sat back again.
"So I suppose I missed you while you were gone, Toya. It was lonely, even though I have so many friends…" Toya rolled his eyes in a way that Hikaru couldn't picture himself having done often. He wondered if that was Toya's own feelings shining through his act.
"Well, perhaps you would have preferred to tag along with me. To "hang", as you put it. Show me that…there's more to life than GO." That gave Toya pause. "It would have been nice to have you there. I didn't even have a decent roommate."
"But your parents were there, weren't they?" Toya said, seeming to negate Shindou's thoughts on how he felt that Toya felt on his trip. "Didn't you play GO with Toya-san?"
"Yes, but… His crowd runs a bit old," Shindou said, pouting in distaste. "It would have been nice to have a young friend along with me." Toya sat up straight, breaking character again.
"I don't understand why you'd think I'd feel that way, Shindou. I had fun with father."
"So…you didn't wish that I was there?" Hikaru asked.
"Sometimes I did. I would have wanted to play with you, because playing with father is sometimes so usual that I long for the excitement you bring to the table."
"Can I ask you something?"
"Yes."
"Do you sometimes wish that…you had brothers and sisters?"
"Well…not really. There were always people coming in and out of the house to play with me and it was fun." Toya lowered his gaze and then sighed wistfully. "Sometimes, though, I do wish that mother and I had spent more time together while I was growing up. Father discouraged my…clinging to her and whining to her. He always stepped in to make sure that I…handled the situation in a dignified manner."
"Even as a baby?" Toya looked as if he was about to say yes, but then he sunk down a bit. Probably, he recognized what a terrible thing it was to admit.
"But I'm certain that you did not have that problem. You and your mother are quite close."
"Yeah," Hikaru said. "I love moms, she's awesome. Dad's cool, too, he's just always working a lot."
"Your mother…is a very kind woman… A little nervous, but kind." Hikaru nodded. "She doesn't know much about GO, however."
"Nah. That's my gramps."
"I see. So you found your influence through him?"
"No… That was through Sai." Toya perked as Hikaru slapped his hand over his mouth. Toya's eyes lit up like the first stars at dusk. "Me and my big mouth…"
"Oh, Shindou!" Toya said. "Do tell. Tell me all about Master Sai."
"Master?" Hikaru asked. "You're sure putting a lot of stock into him."
"Everyone is still so thrilled and interested. He is your instructor, right? You must tell me all about him." Hikaru sighed.
"Toya…we have to wait. At least until I find out more about you."
"You know a lot about me," Toya said, setting a hand to his chest.
"Well, I want to know more," Hikaru said. "Do you like to cook?"
"Yes. I have found much joy in baking and collecting cookbooks since leaving the family home. It is something I have been bonding with mother over when father isn't around."
"What do you mean when he's not around? What's he got against you talking with your mom?"
"Well, he thinks it's…something that a young man shouldn't…concern himself with. He believes that…her… That she will rub off on me in a negative way."
"What, like you'll go all girly or something?"
"Something along those lines…"
"Do you think I'm girly?"
"No." Toya shook his head.
"Well, I was always around ma."
"I am around mother more now than I ever have been," Toya said. "And I enjoy myself. I wouldn't say I'm becoming girly, or feminine…" Toya trailed off. He sighed and wrung his hands. "Shindou…do you think I'm girly?"
"Most people that are prim and proper are that way because that's just how it is. I don't think it's a bad thing."
"I think that father thinks I'm too feminine. I think…he is upset by it."
"Your dad's a stuck up ol' bore."
"Shindou, please," Toya scolded. "Don't insult my father."
"Oh…sorry…" Shindou said. "But it's not like it's not the truth. I think he knows it himself. I think he's trying to make you the same way. I'm glad that you've got a hobby outside of GO, though, Toya. It's good to be well rounded."
"I have many hobbies…" Toya said. "But…they aren't hobbies that…I…make public."
"Well, like what?"
"Knitting. Sewing… Quilting… Things like that."
"Really?"
"Yes. And gardening. On days when father is traveling, mother and I spend that time catching up on the latest trends in botanical dressings, in landscaping. I have learned much about her famed koi pond and garden."
"Well, that's cool," Hikaru said. He nodded.
"It's just that…I like the peace and quiet… I like to settle into a task and work hard and long at it…for a pleasant result." Hikaru nodded again. He could understand where Toya was coming from and didn't think he had to explain himself. "I understand that you…are more interested in comics and cartoons."
"Yeah. Love manga." Toya smiled slightly.
"I have tried to read them, but I can't seem to understand the draw."
"Well, they aren't for everyone."
"No, I suppose they aren't."
"I like board games and video games, too," Hikaru said. "You ever played chess like they play overseas?"
"Yes, I have."
"I like it, even though I always lose." Toya twiddled his thumbs. He looked away, and then made eye contact with Hikaru.
"Do you think I'm weird?" he asked. "Knowing my hobbies?"
"No, not at all. I think it's cool."
"I see. Well…at any rate, you understand that…it isn't something that I want to get out, right?"
"Well…not really, but now that you told me, I won't say anything."
"Wouldn't you be embarrassed to admit such things?"
"That I like plants?"
"And baking…and…sewing…?"
"No. Who cares?" Toya looked away again. He twiddled his thumbs again, and chewed on the inside of his bottom lip. Hikaru watched him, quirking a brow. "Apparently you care…" he said.
"Father would be rather upset to learn that I occupy my time with such things."
"Because they distract you from GO?" Toya shook his head.
"Not only that… It would also be because they aren't… They are…the types of things that women involve themselves with."
"Well, apparently boys do, too, if you like them," Hikaru said frankly. Toya pursed his lips and moved them in a peculiar manner. Hikaru found himself drawn to them. He had always liked Toya's mouth, for reasons he couldn't explain.
"But… Wouldn't you agree that they are women's interests?"
"Well, not really," Hikaru said. "Anybody can do anything. Lots of people like all kinds of things and it shouldn't matter what sex they are." Toya stared at him for a short time.
"Really?" he asked. "You really believe that?"
"Yeah," Hikaru chuckled. "I don't think that we should stereotype, at least not in a way that makes someone feel bad. I mean, your dad's trying to make you feel bad and make you feel like you can't do things that make you happy because it's something that maybe a lot of women do more than men, but, I mean, he can't do that. It's mean." Toya chewed more on his lip.
"But…what if the stereotype…was true…?" he asked quietly.
"What do you mean?"
"Like…expecting only…effeminate men to like feminine things?"
"Oh, you mean because you're girly, or something?" Toya looked caught even though he was the one to bring that assessment up into the conversation. He looked away.
"Would it surprise you…?" he began. Then he seemed to change the subject. "It's not as if I've…ever really shown any interest in manly things."
"Well, neither have I, but I'm not girly. I'm telling you, it's just your upbringing. Preppy guys always come off as girly, even when they're buff and playing tennis and stuff." Toya rubbed the back of his neck.
"Have you…ever dated before, Shindou-kun?" he asked. Hikaru frowned and shook his head after thinking the point of the question over.
"Why?"
"I mean…I… I was just wondering. You and…Fujisaki-san have always seemed so close and yet even now you aren't dating. I was just wondering…you know…if you'd ever dated before."
"Akari-chan and I are just friends," Hikaru said. "And besides, she's seeing someone now."
"Oh…" Toya licked his lips, his eyes still averted. "Are you…jealous of her?"
"What, that she's dating and I'm not? Not really."
"I mean of her boyfriend."
"No…" Shindou said. He had the feeling that Toya wanted to know something specific, but that he was asking other questions to find the answer. Upset, he said, "Are you reaching, Toya? If you want to know something just come out and ask me. I want to talk to you and I want you to feel like you can ask me anything." Toya looked more nervous now. He cleared his throat slightly and lowered his head.
"Well…about dating… Have you ever considered anyone…such as…someone in your life lately? You have a lot of friends, but…well…I have never seen you…" Toya moved his hands, at a loss for words.
"You wanna know if I've met someone I wanted to date?" Toya nodded. "Yeah. How about you?"
"Yes…" Toya lowered his face so much that his bangs hid his eyes. "I have," he said.
"Who? Someone I know?"
"Well, that isn't fair," Toya said, shaking his head slightly. "You're asking before I can ask you."
"Oh, well… I don't think you'd want to know who I'm thinking about. I don't think it will ever happen, so it doesn't matter."
"Why do you think that?"
"Because we're…sorta incompatible and I think that…we would have more problems than most couples…"
"Why do you think that?" Hikaru took in a deep breath and swiped his thumb across his upper lip.
"Because…it would be a, uh…gay thing," he said with a shrug. Toya lifted his head quickly and stared Hikaru directly in the eyes, his face bright red.
"You're hom—" Hikaru could tell by the movement of his hair that he was shaking.
"Yeah…" Hikaru said, trying to shrug his nervousness away. He looked down and scratched his forehead. "Are you mad?" Toya's eyes had never left his. He looked so stunned. Somehow, his hair had become unsettled. He simply stared, nonplussed. Then suddenly, his expression turned from bewilderment to mild anger, his eyebrows furrowed heavily across his forehead. "Toya…?"
"Who is this…character you're referring to?" Toya demanded, moving his hand impatiently. "What does he look like? Where is he from, have I met him?" Hikaru's eyebrows furrowed in turn.
"Why…do you want to know so bad?"
"Is he…someone I know? Please, tell me. Is it…is it Sai?"
"Whoa, no!" Hikaru said, lifting his hands in denial. "No, Sai's… No, Toya, it's not Sai." Toya looked, of all things, relieved. He put a shaking hand to his chest and searched the kotatsu with his bug-eyed gaze as if it would give him the answers to his questions. "Toya…what's up? I don't get it. Are you mad?"
"No…" Toya said. "No, I'm not. Just…will you please tell me who this gentleman is? Have I met him?"
"Well, who do you think it is?"
"It's Sai, isn't it?" Toya looked afraid as he asked again. "This Sai, he…he's got to be the one. He must be why you never say anything about him. He's your secret lover, isn't he?" Hikaru's nervousness was melting into humor. He honestly couldn't believe Toya's reaction.
"What are you going on about Sai for? I told you he wasn't the one. Now, I told you a secret about myself. It's your turn. It'll be an even exchange."
"Oh, well…" Toya pulled his hands to his chest. "What…what secret am I supposed to tell?"
"Who are you secretly in love with?"
"Oh…" Toya shook his head slightly. "You mustn't ask that…" Suddenly, color rose in his cheeks. "Oh, my. I can't believe this. I can't believe what I've just heard. How…how did you know that you were…hom—?" Toya huffed and looked at Hikaru again. Hikaru chuckled slightly.
"Why don't you drink some cocoa and calm down?"
"Tea. I need tea. Chamomile. Yes…" Toya rose mechanically from the floor and walked into the kitchen. "When did you first know, Shindou?" he asked. "Who are you in love with? Is it someone I know?" Hikaru stood up from the floor and stuffed his hands in his back pockets.
"I knew since I was a kid," he said. "But I always hid it, you know? I didn't think anybody would understand. I told ma the year after we met…" Toya had taken a teacup from the cabinets, but when he turned, he dropped it. It fell to the ground and shattered into small, sharp fragments.
"Oh, no…" Toya murmured. "I've broken it… Oh, my…" He looked at Hikaru, still shaking. "What…should I do?"
"Here, come here," Hikaru said, reaching for his hand. Toya reached and took it. Hikaru squeezed it and pulled it towards him. "Come here." Toya stepped over the shards and looked down at them.
"It's broken."
"Let me handle it. I'll fix your tea, okay?"
"Okay…" Toya walked over to the futon and sat down tensely, his hands cupped in his lap and his eyes focused on the kotatsu. Hikaru set up a kettle on the stove and then began to clean the shards. Partway through, he was startled to see that Toya was staring at him, watching him with a peculiar expression. "Shindou-kun…?"
"Yeah?"
"Who…is it that…you are in love with?"
"I don't know that's it love just yet. I just know that…there's an attraction there."
"Who? Won't you tell me?"
"Just…relax a minute," Hikaru said. "I don't want to tell you until you've calmed down."
"But I am calm…" Hikaru scooped another dustpan full of glass into the garbage can.
"I think I've seen you calmer," he said. He stood up and stretched his back before he searched through the cabinets for tea. Toya had several flavors lined up in silver cans. Hikaru soon found out that he had to make the teabag himself. He took a spoon from the utensil drawer and scooped some of the chamomile tea into the bag. He tied it closed and dropped it into another tea cup. He glanced over to Toya, who was staring at the kotatsu again. Hikaru wondered what it was that he was so worried about.
Deciding not to wait too long, Hikaru poured the water into the cup before it was ready. It was still hot, but not so hot that it would hurt Toya's already sore mouth. Hikaru walked over to the futon and sat next to him. Toya reached for it.
"Here ya go," Hikaru said. "Sit back and hold it with both hands." Toya did as he was told. He cupped it tightly and took a quick drink. Instantly, the tension in his body eased away and his shoulders drooped comfortably.
"Mmm…" he murmured. He drank more. "I love tea…" he said. He drank a little more and closed his eyes. He inhaled the scent of the tea and seemed to relax even more. "Thank you," he said. "It's lovely. It's just right."
"You're welcome, Toya…" Toya lowered his hands and looked over to Hikaru.
"Will you…tell me, now?" he asked, carefully. Hikaru rubbed his hands together and sighed.
"Well…yeah I guess it wouldn't hurt… It's, uh… It's you, Toya." Toya made a sound akin to regurgitation and he quickly brought a hand to his mouth.
"Oh, God…" he moaned. His legs began to jump and the hand that held the tea was shaking so bad it began to slosh the liquid over Toya's knees.
"Toya!" Hikaru called out. He grabbed the hand to stop it from shaking. "Toya." Toya faced Hikaru quickly, his eyes rimmed with tears.
"Me?" he mouthed, and it reminded Hikaru of people who won awards that they had thought they weren't going to win, but that they wanted, badly. "Me?" Toya asked again. His eyes slowly shifted to the kotatsu as tears spilled over and down his cheeks. Hikaru quickly took the cup away and held Toya's hands.
"Are you okay?" he asked.
"Shindou…? How could you say that we aren't compatible?" Toya gasped, his voice hitching in his throat. "Oh, my G— Hn." Toya shook his head and looked at Hikaru again. Hikaru honestly had no idea what to make of the reaction.
"Are you…happy?" he asked. Toya's head bobbed up and down.
"Of…course…" he cried. "But you don't think that you…lo-lo-love me?" he asked. "I-I-I want…you to lo-love m-me…"
"Well, that's what getting to know each other better is for, Toya…" Hikaru said, scooting closer. He slipped his arm around Toya and held him tightly. Toya turned towards him and sobbed into his chest.
"I…lo-love y-y-you…" he huffed. Hikaru smiled to himself.
"Aww, Toya…" he said shyly. "You do?" Toya nodded.
"I was afraid that y-you were in lo-love with so-someone e-else…" he said. "It w-would h-hurt so bad if you loved an-another man, Hi-Hikaru." Hikaru smiled wider. "If you lo-loved Sa-Sa-Sai…"
"Well, I do love Sai, just not in that way," Hikaru said. "He's special to me, but…it's different with you. I wanna…be intimate with you, and be boyfriends with you."
"We're…compatible…" Toya said, calming down. "O-ow…"
"What's wrong?"
"My mouth…" Toya pressed his hand to his cheek. "I forgot how much it hurts."
"Hm… Well…maybe I can distract you from it again…"
"What? How?" Hikaru smirked, and then leaned towards him. He pursed his lips slightly against the side of Toya's mouth, very gently. Toya made a soft purring noise in his throat. Hikaru pulled away and smiled at him. Toya's eyes had widened, and the aqua colored orbs were brightly shining again. Shaking, but determined, Toya came toward Hikaru and kissed him again. The pull of his lips was strong and he moaned again. Hikaru exhaled loudly, for the feel of Toya's lips upon his was strikingly pleasurable. He broke contact again and leaned back, trying to catch his breath.
"To…ya…"
"Hi…Hikaru…" Toya sniffed, and cupped Hikaru's face in his hands. He kissed him again, deeper this time, shifting his body towards him. "Mm…" he moaned. He pressed their foreheads together, his breathing heavy and shallow. "Mm." They kissed again, Toya leaning further on Hikaru, causing him to lay down on the futon. Hikaru wrapped his arms around Toya and brought him closer. The pleasure gained from the intimacy of their actions was pooling quickly and heavily towards Hikaru's groin, and he began to ache. Toya pulled away again, huffing and puffing, his lips full and red, his face still moist from his tears.
"Toya…" Hikaru gasped. "Hey… Uh…"
"Mm…" Toya rubbed his thumb across Hikaru's lower lip. He pecked him on the lips and then on the nose. Again, he rested their foreheads together. "Would you…kiss someone you didn't love…?" he asked. Hikaru's mind was devoid of thought, and yet he still shook his head in response.
"No…" he said. Toya chuckled very faintly.
"No…" he said. "I didn't think you would. Not you, Hikaru…" Toya sank down onto the futon beside him and hugged him. "We can be compatible without having to have…everything in the world in common, Hikaru…" he said. He rubbed his stomach and giggled shyly, snuggling against his side. Hikaru's body felt as if it was on fire. He pulled Toya closer and tried to kiss his crown. The feather light touch caused Toya to shiver. "Hm…" he murmured. "Dad…dad can't know about this."
"I know, Toya…" Hikaru said. "I know… Let's just take things one step at a time."
"Yeah… We'll talk more over a game, okay?"
"Yeah…" Hikaru said. "Yeah, okay."
Thank you for reading and please review,
Arima