Similarities

People thought that Ronon and Teyla were very similar, cut from the same cloth as the saying went, but Jennifer knew that the similarities were only superficial. She should know, after all, she'd spent enough time trapped in situations of no escape with both of them. The infirmary, New Athos, actually now she thought about it she spent a lot of time trapped places. The excitement with Carter and Rodney in the hole came to mind. This habit of hers couldn't be healthy. In fact, she knew it wasn't. One moment she was her usual shy, self doubting...self and the next she found herself doing things like eating gross food and walking across highly unsafe rope bridges and shooting people and kissing Ronon Dex. Well, not quite on the last one.

Jennifer really wasn't sure how she had ended up at the almost but not quite kissing stage with Ronon. Actually, that was a total lie. She knew exactly how she had gotten there, what she didn't want to admit was why. Although judging from the embarrassed looks, or what she assumed was embarrassed for Ronon, Jennifer wasn't the best judge of social situations, Ronon seemed to be suffering the same personal crisis she was. Or something. His tales about his former lover had really kicked the whole thing off. How she had been a doctor too, how Jennifer reminded Ronon of her. That was when most girls ran a mile but instead she had leaned in. What had she been thinking?

Well, once again Jennifer could answer herself. And what the hell, the paperwork wasn't going anywhere at this time of night and she did have a small bottle tucked away; a birthday present she had been saving. May as well continue the melancholy self analysis.

It came back to her original thought that had struck her part way through a report on Ronon's umpteenth sparring injury this month. Or week, she lost count regularly. Ronon and Teyla were similar. Same quiet manner, same strength, both native to Pegasus and with survival skills to boot. They even a similar physical appearance; dark hair and a medium skin tone. Although what was more to the point was that Ronon reminded her of Teyla. A lot. Teyla who was currently pregnant, Teyla who was mourning the loss of the father of her unborn child along with the rest of her missing people.

She sighed and buried her head in her hands. "Timing, Jennifer. What great timing."

There had been a... connection between herself and Teyla, or at least, that is what she had felt. Teyla was brave, was caring and kind. She was strong when she had to be and sympathetic as well. The Athosian woman had Jennifer doing things that she didn't think she'd ever be able to do. Eating raw animal, spending a night in the woods while being hunted by cannibals...Teyla was the only reason that Jennifer was here now, that she had made it back home.

The baby had been unexpected and Jennifer had known that Teyla would want someone around who knew her secret, someone who she could talk to. The support Jennifer had offered had soon turned into a friendship; eating lunch together, swapping stories about their lives and Jennifer thought she'd taught Teyla more about human culture in a few weeks than John Sheppard had in a few years. Teyla would come to visit her in the infirmary, drag her away from mounds of paperwork and make sure she ate and slept enough. Ironic, really, given she was a doctor.

And all of that had been fine. More than fine even. Jennifer wasn't used to having friends, being the young genius girl at school and university had put the blockers on that. And then, of course, things went wrong. Well, not wrong just...impossible. Under other circumstances the situation may have even worked nicely with a happy ending.

But realising just how beautiful Teyla was, admiring her elegance and grace and hanging on her every word were generally things not to do when the subject of ones thoughts was a pregnant, and therefore straight, friend. It was just like her lab partner all over again. Whenever she made a female friend, or thought she had at least, these feelings got in the way. Well, it was the snakes with the lab partner, but still.

She had quickly accepted that Teyla would never reciprocate her feelings. That was nothing new, she'd gotten over women and men before. But then there was Ronon. Ronon who reminded her of Teyla, Ronon who possessed the same strength, the same quiet manner. Add to that an impossible situation with God knows how many people infected with God knows what disease and...What had she been thinking?

Well actually once again Jennifer knew what she had been thinking; that Ronon reminded her of Teyla, reminded her of someone she loved but could never have. The similarities were there, superficial, but there. And falling for Ronon would have been much less complicated than falling for Teyla.

Sadly, though, it was the unsuperficial qualities that had drawn her to Teyla in the first place. Which was why she was going to get a handle on this. She had found an amazing, warm friend in the Athosian and she wasn't going to lose that, she decided as she put away the three quarters full bottle and the glass.

Jennifer could brush aside her feelings, hide them away, get over them and get back to the way things had been before. She could do that. She could.

After the near kiss with Ronon in 'Sunday', Jennifer reflects on the similarities between Ronon and Teyla. Jennifer/Teyla pairing.

AN: I wasn't sure about this piece. I love the idea of Jennifer/Teyla but this just took on a life of its own. My wonderful and lovely beta reader Nanuk Dain (check out her amazing stories on livejournal!) reassured me, however, that she loved the story and so here it is.