Title: Fighting a Losing Battle
Author: suprockstar
Pairing: Anna & Jeremy. (:
Rating: PG-13 to T, I guess. Very angsty.
Disclaimer: I own nothing, yeah it's sad.
Summary: Everything that he wants to say, everything that he can tell her that will make her feel better (lies), dies at the back of his throat. She's Anna, and she deserves the truth.
Fighting a Losing Battle
He clutches the newspaper in his hands, his knuckles turning a pale white, and the picture of her, shaking with his hands that he cannot seem to keep still. He doesn't want to believe that Vicky is dead, no she isn't dead, no, she's not. He keeps telling himself this, keeps repeating it over and over, because if he does, maybe he will believe it, maybe he can go back to thinking that she just left town, and that is an easier much easier pill to swallow.
Tears are spewing onto his cheeks, and he can't stop them, and they just keep coming and coming, and it is only when he spots a flash of dark hair out of the corner of his eye that he realizes that someone else is in the room with him. It's Anna, oh Anna, he hasn't forgotten about her, how could he? But there is just too much pain for him to comprehend, and he just doesn't know what to do now.
"What are you doing?" She asks, her eyebrows furrowed, staring at the trembling newspaper in his hands. He looks down, the feeling of shame overcoming in him in waves and waves of self-resentment, because he is just reminded of what he had been doing to Anna for the past couple of weeks.
His voice is trembling when he is trying to explain about his friend, and how he thought that she was a vampire, because it just all made sense!
"She's the reason why you wanted to turn." Anna says bluntly back to him, her eyes deep in the pain of what he has just inflicted upon her. He looks down, because he can't stand to see those beautiful eyes, can't stand to see that much hurt in them, for they would indefinitely mirror what is in his own.
He doesn't know what to do, when she is standing in front of him looking as hurt as she does, and accusing him of what he wanted to do all along. Vicky was the reason why he wanted to learn about vampires. Vicky was the reason why he was so desperately ached, for the fact that Anna would be one. Vicky was the reason for everything he had yearned for, for how he acted. Vicky was the reason for every fucking thing.
"You wanted to be with her." She says this part quietly, but forcibly all the same. Her eyes stare at him, waiting for a reply, and he knows that he deserves to give her one, but everything that he wants to say, everything that he can tell her that will make her feel better (lies), dies at the back of his throat. She's Anna, and she deserves the truth.
"I'm sorry." That's all he can spit out to her, but by the time he does, gathers up the courage to turn his head and face her, she's gone.
He's already lost too much.