Her life, she decided, was a lie. A big, fat lie built on a foundation of untruths. She could admit this only to herself, and no one else would ever know. Not even Satoko.
It was a Monday morning. She'd had trouble motivating herself even to get up and go to school. She wasn't sure which was worse - weekends, when she was completely alone, or weekdays, when her supposed friends would laugh at silly things while she pretended to join in their amusement, never noticing how she really felt.
Rena asked her if she was feeling alright, because her eyes seemed so red.
"I was doing some cleaning. That room is really dusty..." she told them. "I guess I must be allergic, nii~pah." she finished with her trademark saying. This, she knew, would be considered cute, maybe moe, even. The normal Rika-chan they all knew and loved.
"Don't overdo it." Keiichi cautioned
"I won't, promise."
She paid little attention to the studies she had repeated time and time again. It began to become almost a mind-numbing boredom. The others were amazed at her knowledge. She would smile modestly and tell them she had been understanding the material really well lately.
None of them would remember the number of times she had repeatedly used that excuse.
On the night of the Wataganashi festival, everybody was excited. They fell hook, line, and sinker for her act of anticipation as well. They had no idea of the thoughts that swam through her head in the days leading up to the festival.
"Don't be embarrassed!" Mion teased. Or maybe it was Shion pretending to be Mion - Rika no longer cared.
She playfully denied the embarrassment she knew was likely quite apparent. Love was the one thing she could still occasionally be caught up in the schoolgirl sentiments of. She was embarrassed, but not for the reason they thought she was.
"Yes you are!" Satoko chimed in with a giggle, "You're really easy to read, Rika-chan, you know?"
"Nii~pah..." she blushed as though she were finally giving in and admitting she had a crush.
If she was so easy to read, she later wondered, why did nobody notice? Sure there were times when she deliberately kept things hidden, but there were also times when she felt empty and tried to cry out for help. But how could she force such a burden upon her friends?
There were times when she felt so sad that she didn't know what to do. Nothing that she normally did sounded interesting, so she would just lie in bed all day. Sometimes, she would silently call out to one of her friends, wishing they could hear her. She was too unmotivated to reach for the phone, but she wished somebody were there at all. The next day that she forced herself to go back to school. She excused that she'd had the flu and had spent the majority of the day sleeping.
Sometimes she would be exhausted. "I'm tired." she would tell Satoko when they had finished their work, "I couldn't sleep last night."
Rika hoped the girl would inquire as to why, wanting somebody to talk to, but instead she just shrugged, "That happens sometimes. Try to get extra sleep tonight, that way you won't be tired tomorrow. If you don't get enough sleep, you could get sick..."
Her friend's concern was touching, but she seemed to not notice that something was very wrong.
She sometimes toyed with the idea of telling them everything she knew. But that would only make the problem worse.
"Me? I'm supposed to kill everybody!?" the year's murderer would reply in disbelief, and it would slowly eat away at their sanity until they snapped and killed everyone. So, she suffered in silence.
This year, she would die again. She wished she could end it all. Normally, people with that wish would kill themselves. But Rika knew that would only send her back to the beginning. She wished she could get rid of the Himemizawa disease. Even if that was then the end, permanently, she preferred it.
Anything had to be better than this.
Rika could again only watch as the events played out. Rena started to act a little differently than normal. Mion and Shion switched places for a few days. Then, suddenly, neither of them went to school
Concerned, Keiichi suggested they go visit the now three (though he only knew of two) missing persons.
Arriving at the Sonozaki family's torture chamber, Satoko and Keiichi were terrified. Rika feigned to relate. Keiichi was the insane girl's first target. Which twin it was, Rika couldn't have cared less. She felt an instinct to cover Satoko's eyes and protect her from the sight that would undoubtedly be soon before them. Sure enough, the sounds were more than disturbing enough for the young girl without visuals. The blue-haired girl was largely unfazed. Blood, bones, and even the visible organs now bothered her little.
The twin's next target was Rika. Rika hoped it would be over with quickly, especially for Satoko's sake. She stood, resigning herself to the fate she was certain would be inevitable.
Bracing herself, she attempted to mentally prepare for whatever would happen. Whatever it was, she was certain it wouldn't be the worst pain she had experienced. They had already killed her at least once in every imaginable way. It was nothing out of the ordinary.
That is, until Satoko decided that she could not just sit and watch while her friend was tortured and killed. In an act of far more bravery than any of them knew she possessed, she ran and pulled Rika out of the way. Running, she half-dragger her last remaining friend to a hiding spot.
Satoko released Rika's hand, "Rika-chan, are you alright?"
"I-I'm fine, nii~pah... just a little shaken..."
"What are we going to do? Can we get out of here and to the police in time?"
She debated how to answer. The true Furude Rika knew there was no escaping, but the Rika everyone thought they knew would always have hope. Instead, she lied. "My legs are too shaky... I can't run." Naturally, most people would be terrified if they were about to die. It would seem normal, understandable.
Satoko hugged her, "It'll be ok, Rika-chan."
It was then that Rika felt tears falling, against her will.
"Rika-chan...?"
"Thank you, Satoko-chan. Thank you for protecting me..." Truthfully, this had little to do with it. She was grateful, for no one had ever tried to protect her before. Not when it risked their life as well. But the real reason she was crying was because of the figure behind Satoko.
No matter how many times everything happened, it was far more painful to watch her friends die.