A/N: Pssst! I've recently started reading all fanfics at 1/2 the page. If you go up on this page and to the right, you'll see it says a bunch of stuff like full, 3/4, 1/2. If you read this, or any story at 1/2, it makes SUCH a difference. You should try it. I like it SO much better.
Disclaimer: See chapter one.
* * *
EIGHT
* * *
I stared from Noelle to Cellie, and back to Noelle. The wrath of a mother was not something to be taken lightly, and Cellie's mother was no exception.
MAYBE, ME GO? I signed, timidly… hopefully, but Noelle cut her eyes at me.
She replied, "No, this probably concerns you, too, so I'd appreciate it if you stayed." Which really meant I didn't have a choice.
She turned back to Cellie, whose face was glowing with embarrassment. She didn't seem to know where to look, but she couldn't stare at the floor for too long, because her mother demanded all of the attention in the room.
"Where did you go this weekend? And don't you dare lie to me, Cellie Donovan," she said, her tone of voice matching her signing exactly.
Cellie shot me a look, that I probably would have mistaken as a plea for help if I didn't study her face expressions the way I had. The look clearly said, 'Get out. I don't want you here witnessing this right now. It's embarrassing enough as it is.' So I tried again to leave.
MY MOM, MAYBE LOOK-FOR-ME… WANT ME HOME, I signed, too nervous to actually make eye-contact with Noelle.
"I'm sure that if I called your mom to tell her what's going on, she wouldn't mind you staying to help work things out," she said and signed, eyes flashing.
"Um, well…" I mumbled.
"Shall I test the theory?" she asked, tone hard.
I shook my head, and signed a feeble, NO.
She turned back to her daughter. WHERE YOU GO, CELLIE? ME NOT ASK AGAIN.
SCHOOL, Cellie answered, a mutinous expression on her face. ME WANT GO-TO SCHOOL! YOU KNOW!
ME TELL-YOU NO! Noelle retorted.
ME WANT GO! Cellie argued. ME WANT MEET DEAF PEOPLE. LEARN DEAF CULTURE. MEET DEAF WORLD!
ONLY ONE WORLD, NOT HEARING, NOT DEAF, Noelle interrupted. BEFORE, ME TELL YOU.
LIE! Cellie said. YOU NOT UNDERSTAND.
ME YES UNDERSTAND! YOU NOT GO-TO DEAF SCHOOL. YOU STAY HERE. ME TEACH YOU -
NO! ME WANT GO! GO GO GO!
CELLIE! But Cellie had covered her eyes, and wasn't 'listening' anymore. Noelle had to physically pry her hands away from her face.
LISTEN TO-ME NOW, Noelle signed furiously. YOU WANT, YOU WANT, YOU WANT ALWAYS! YOU OLD-16, ONLY! ME YOUR MOTHER. YOU LISTEN TO-ME! YOU WANT GO-TO SCHOOL? ME SAY NO. YOU YOUNG, VERY. YOU NOT LEAVE, NOT GO ALONE.
"And you!" she suddenly spoke aloud to me, her signing never ceasing. "How could you support her? Just let her go? You realize she's only sixteen, don't you? She's too young to go off on her own and just - "
"I know," I said, signing too.
"You know?" Noelle said. "You agree with me?"
I turned to Cellie and she stared at me, hurt evident in her eyes. I was a horrible person. Especially for what I was about to do. My reasons were completely selfish, but as much as I wanted her to be happy, I wanted her to be happy with me. And maybe she would come around… maybe she would learn to forgive me, for this.
ME SORRY, I signed, steeling myself. ME THINK… YOUR MOM, SHE RIGHT. YOU SHOULD STAY HERE.
Cellie's mouth dropped open and at once, her entire expression crumpled to pieces in front of me. It was as if it were happening in slow motion. I reached out a hand for her, to hug her, or comfort her, I don't know, but she recoiled from me, and I felt my heart break.
She looked from me, to her mother, then back to me.
Her face expression hardened, and she flicked her fingers at me in a sign I didn't recognize. Then very slowly, she fingerspelled, H-A-T-E. And before I could react, she turned without another word and ran upstairs.
"Thank you, Embry," Noelle said, tiredly.
I turned to her, uncomprehendingly. My heart was shattering into tiny slivers and she was thanking me? For what? Betraying my imprint?
"She's just being dramatic. She'll come around. And probably to you, a lot faster than me."
I couldn't say anything. I wanted to curl up and die somewhere, and I could feel the bile rising in my throat. I could only imagine what my face looked like, then.
I hurried to the front door without even attempting to say goodbye, and hurled myself through it, only then regretting my decision to have Jared leave. I ran as fast I as I could and as soon as I hit a line of dense trees, I burst out of my clothes and exploded into my wolf form.
And I howled.
* * *
It took five seconds for me to realize that I had done a horrible thing. It took three hours for the pack to calm me down enough to phase back. And then it took me 10 minutes to fully understand that Cellie was not going to answer any video messages from me any time soon.
She was utterly and truly angry with me.
And I deserved it.
I trudged home, glad to be alone with my mind once more. As if I deserved to feel good about anything. I almost wanted to phase and hear all of their voices just to torture myself. They were upset with me, yes, but unfortunately, they could also all feel my pain acutely. And yelling at me about it would just make all of us feel worse, so it wasn't exactly like having sympathetic ears.
My mother must have been waiting up for me because before I even pulled out my key, she flung the door open.
"Embry! Cellie's missing! She ran away!" Her worried face bore no signs of trickery, and I knew she wouldn't joke about something like this.
Immediately, I turned back and headed for the woods.
"Noelle mentioned a disagreement. Something about school? Honey, what happened?" she called after me. "Embry, where are you going?"
But, of course. I couldn't just run into the woods and phase. Not with my mother staring after me.
"Can I borrow your car?" I asked. I wouldn't use it to go far. Just far enough, and I'd park it in a secluded place, jump out and phase. A time-waster, but a necessary precaution.
"You don't have your license," she raised an eyebrow. "I think it's better if we call the police. Chief Swan - "
"Ugh, no, Mom! You can't even report a missing person until they've been gone for a certain number of hours," I held my hand out for her keys, but she still wouldn't budge. I let out an impatient sound. "Look, I can just walk."
"I'll drive you - "
"I'll run," I said, already off the porch. I headed for the nearest line of trees, ignoring the sound of her voice calling my name. Over and over.
As soon as the trees were thick enough, I deserted my clothes and shoes. Well, Jared's clothes and shoes that he had let me borrow, lest my mother think my shoes were robbed or something, seeing as I had completely destroyed my own outfit in my grief earlier.
Luckily, we were close to the same size. And my mother hasn't paid attention to what I wear since elementary school when she dressed me in plaid button-down shirts everyday. She had somehow gotten it into her head that we had to wear uniforms. Only my mother…
Anyways, I let out a howl. As much as I didn't want the others back in my head, I would need their help to find Cellie. There were potential dangers lurking in these woods, and I didn't want one of them to find my imprint. Especially since, indirectly, that would be my fault, and I didn't know if I could live with both something happening to her and knowing I could have prevented it.
Embry?
What's happening?
Ran away? Seriously?
I thundered down a - well-known - path by now to Cellie's house, and immediately stopped. She was in the woods. Right outside her house.
Still need us?
Oh good. You found her.
Obviously, he doesn't. I'm out.
Such a douche, Paul.
Shut up, Brady.
Hope that pie is still warm…
They all phased back in a matter of seconds, after I confirmed that I didn't need them.
I started to approach her eagerly, then I realized two things. One, she still knew absolutely nothing about the wolves, so she wouldn't recognize me. And two, if I phased back I would be naked. And then I'd be forced to explain.
Fuck. In my rush, I hadn't even thought to tie the shorts to my leg.
I knew I could get away undetected, since she wouldn't be able to hear me moving around, but I didn't want to leave her unprotected in these woods. Like I said, they were dangerous.
I hesitated, deliberating. I supposed I could follow her, making sure she didn't come to any harm. Or I could expose myself to her in wolf form, hope that she'd be scared of me, come to her senses, and run back in the house shrieking.
Right.
This was Cellie I was talking about. Knowing her, she'd come up and pet me.
I groaned aloud, and it came out sounding like a whine.
But, I thought to myself, would it really be so bad? If she discovered me here? If I phased in front of her. I was allowed to tell her; she was my imprint. I had to tell her sooner or later.
And maybe it should be sooner… maybe knowing this secret about me would cause to change her mind, to understand that I literally could not survive if she walked out of my life.
I caught a whiff or her salty tears, and impulsively, I moved my massive body forward into her line of vision, not allowing myself to think about it any further. In that instant, she spotted me and her eyes widened as her breathing hitched.
She started to back away, but I was correct in the assumption that she wouldn't scream. I didn't detect any fear from her. Only shock, which was to be expected, and wariness. That was good. I wanted her to recognize me before the fear set in. I took a deep breath, mentally.
And then I phased.
And then she screamed.
Everything happened quickly after that.
"CELLIE! CELLIE!" I distinctly heard Noelle open her front door, and dash into the night, and I retreated, stumbling backwards.
Cellie continued to scream, and stare at me. She didn't hear her mother approaching, but the screaming was alerting Noelle in our direction. And I didn't want her to find us.
CELLIE, PLEASE STOP. ME! EMBRY! YOU KNOW ME.
NOT EMBRY. NOT EMBRY, she signed rapidly, over and over. Her screams had quieted, but she continued to back away with wide-eyed horror. NOT EMBRY.
Not too far away, Noelle continued to yell for Cellie, either forgetting that she couldn't hear her, or not caring, and just desperate to find her.
YES, EMBRY, YES ME EMBRY, I signed quickly. SORRY. ME SCARE YOU. ME… W-O-L-F. PLEASE UNDERSTAND ME. LET ME EXPLAIN TO-YOU.
NO. YOU _______. Then, she signed something that I would have been able to understand, even if she didn't mouth it. She raised both hands up to either side of her face and bent her fingers, so that her hands look like claws. She made a scary face. MONSTER.
Monster.
NOT, I signed desperately. And God, I should have planned this better. So much for impulsiveness. In another two seconds her mother would be here, and I would be caught naked.
LATER, I signed, as she continued to gawk at me. Then, I turned and phased back, hearing her gasp once more before I disappeared deeper into the woods.
* * *
"Okay, so it was irrational - "
"It was stupid," Sam growled, after I explained to him what had happened the next morning, a Saturday. "Not to mention dangerous. Not to mention, she could tell her mother about us, completely breaking the secrecy and silence. Do you want the whole place to know of our existence?"
"Sam, I'm sorry. I panicked. She - I'm sorry, okay?" I said, running my hands through my short hair in exasperation.
"You need to go back over there," he said.
"I tried," I replied. And I had earlier that morning. Except she had refused to come to the door, and her mother kept shooting me strange looks as she explained that Cellie wasn't feeling up to company. It was a sure sign that Cellie had mentioned something to her.
"You need to go back over there," he repeated, grouchily.
"If she doesn't want to talk to me, there's not much I can do about it until she calms down," I snapped.
"Embry - "
"Sam," Emily's gentle voice interrupted.
His attention went directly to her, and she gave him an admonishing look. He had the grace to look embarrassed for a second.
"Just take care of it, okay?" he finally said, glancing at me again.
"Yeah," I muttered, before climbing up out of the chair. I nodded to Emily, and then left, walking slowly down the dirt path of their driveway.
It was incomprehensible, but for once, I, Embry Call, needed a distraction. I had gotten completely caught up on all schoolwork, which was the only reason my mother had allowed me to take yesterday off. I had even done some work ahead of time, and was much closer to graduating early than before.
Normally, this early on a Saturday, I would already be heading into work - I paused. Work. Now, there was something I could take care of.
With determination, I headed for Port Angeles.
Exactly an hour and half later, I was fired from my job. Formally, this time. On grounds of misconduct because my friends visited too often (only, like twice), I took days off without calling in sick (two days, and I did call in for both of them the day before, but apparently I'm supposed to call every day that I'm sick), and I completely disregarded the company's rules and regulations (I sometimes whispered to people to take the newer stuff from the back of the shelves, and not the expired stuff from the front).
Whatever. Grocery stores were evil.
Bored as hell, I stopped at home, consumed five frozen pizzas, grabbed some schoolbooks, and then headed for the library. I probably wouldn't study anything, but I wanted to be in a place that I could call mine and Cellie's. If I concentrated, I might be able to pick up remnants of her scent there.
Man, I was pathetic.
I entered the library, aware that it closed early, and wondering idly if anyone would notice if I just stayed after closing time. Would anyone really care? It's not like I would steal the books, or anything. It was a library; they were free anyway.
The dude I had come to recognize was working again. I wondered if he actually lived here somewhere. Or if he owned the place. Or if… they were hiring. As if he would actually give me a job.
I sighed, and reluctantly went over to the counter.
"Ugh," he said, by way of greeting.
"Please don't. I'm having a terrible day," I said, forlornly.
"Well, aren't you just a bowl of sunshine and smiles," he muttered.
"What do you expect when the first thing you say to a person is, 'ugh'?" I asked, sarcastically.
"Touché," he replied, lifting an eyebrow. I rolled my eyes.
"Anyway, just wanted to know if you guys were hiring," I said.
"No," he said, immediately.
"Yes!" someone else said, from behind him. It was a short, middle-aged woman. And she was beaming. "It's about time someone wants to apply here. Nate here likes to scare people away."
"It's my only means of entertainment," Nate said, deadpan.
The woman rolled her eyes in Nate's direction, and then turned back to me. "We had two girls quit a month ago, and I've been trying to get people to apply, but no one seems to want to work in an old dusty, musty library. Are you really interested?"
I looked back at Nate. He glared at me. The dude was so joyless. I grinned at him. He narrowed his eyes even more.
"Sure," I said.
* * *
Predictably, Nate was picked to guide me around on my first day. Which was the next day. Since I really didn't have anything else to do. At all. Since Phynisa - that was the woman's name, and she didn't own the place, but she was the boss - insisted on interviewing me, I couldn't start that very day.
That turned out to be pointless because her interview lasted all of two seconds:
"So, Embry Call, why do you want to work here? What can you offer us that someone else couldn't?"
"I got fired from everywhere else. This is my last resort, which is a guarantee that I will not screw this up."
"Wonderful. You're hired."
"Seriously?"
"We're really desperate."
Yeah, I wasn't going to argue.
The library turned out to be a better job than I had imagined. First, it had that elusive peace and quiet I always found myself searching for. I was in love with quiet, and within the span of a week, I fell head over heels for the library, in a way that I hadn't when I had come in here to study. It was more of an escape than it had ever been.
Second, the guys didn't bother me here. Ever. I don't know if they were allergic to the dust mites or what, but they never came in here. And I realized they had never interrupted my studying here before, either. Whatever it was, I was grateful for it.
Third, it was ideal a place to wait for Cellie to come to me, not to mention a good excuse to keep coming back. I had tried every day to talk to her since the woods thing, but she wasn't having it. And from previous experience, I knew when to leave her alone and stop trying. She would come to me when she was ready, and I had to have faith that she would come find me here. This was our place, our sanctuary, safe haven kind of place.
She had to come find me.
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A/N: So, I have to honestly say, that if I met Embry in person and somehow knew everything that was going on in his head, I probably wouldn't like him. He annoys me. Is that terrible?
In defense to and from myself, the way I wrote him feels so… human. He is glaringly, obviously flawed, and he's real. Yes, in my experience people really think like this. Yes, in my experience people are really this selfish. He's no where near perfect, and he annoys me. But I also am in love with his characterization, and I'm proud of myself for creating his personality this way. I've never worked so hard to bring a character to life, much less a boy character when I myself am so not a boy.
So, I ask you guys… what do you honestly think of my Embry? I'm curious.
Thank you so much for reading and reviewing! I'm at 100!
- FadingSlowly