Losing Her
Pairing: DoVe
Summary: One Shot- Lamb doesn't know how she affected him so quickly or so deeply, but he's still losing her, and its killing them both. Better than description.
Rating: Teen but close to M.
OOOO
She was the first one he told. Why? He couldn't figure it out himself, but he was thankful. He was half-asleep in front of the TV, while a DVR-ed football game played. He had missed the game on a drug bust, and he had read the scores the other day, but nothing else was on.
The knock was almost too quiet, but something inside of him registered it. He padded through the short hall towards the front door, knocking over his small mail table.
She was crying. He had only seen her cry a couple of times, once he had caused it, but it was always sickening to see Veronica Mars cry.
She ran against his chest and embraced him. He was shocked, but he went with it. She was so small and tiny against him. He almost forgot she was the same Veronica Mars that undermined him at every chance. He put his arms around her.
He maneuvered her into his home, being careful to not move her too much, and scare her off. You had to be subtle with Veronica, or she'd run. That was just how she was, and he didn't want her to run right now.
He held her for over ten minutes, he stopped checking when the ten mark passed.
She was dying. At least, she thought she was dying. The doctors had diagnosed a heart condition. She was terrified.
Veronica Mars was scared, he was scared by the fact. He had never thought he would see her this way. Hear her speak with tear choked words. But here he was, witnessing both, and it was killing him. He felt so weak compared to her, and here she was, crying in his arms.
He felt as though he should do something...try and fix it, but there was nothing. He was just a deputy-a sheriff. He was the sheriff, he had power. Just not that kind of power.
He didn't remember who kissed who first. But it was rough. Scratches and bites. He knew she was just trying to prove she was alive, he had done the same after many missed bullets. It was quick and hard, and neither of them were thinking. Her shoes were piercing his hips, he was surprised either of them managed to get off with all the discomfort. But it was one of the best times he had ever had.
They were still panting in each other's arm. Her back against his bedroom door, a path of destruction behind them. The tension left her body. She relaxed, and kissed his neck.
"Deputy." He could hear the spark in her voice.
One quick fuck and Veronica Mars had her game back. This time was pure teasing. They were trying to drive the other mindless, and it worked, he forgot the condom that time, too.
OOOO
She was really dying.
He was killing her.
His child was killing her.
If she gave birth, she would die. The doctors said her heart couldn't take it. They wanted her to abort the child and live a peaceful life, because her heart couldn't take it.
"I am not giving up your child." She sat on his couch, feet propped up, sipping lemon water.
"Its our child." He corrected.
She smiled, softly, "You are the one who is going to raise it, not me."
"Veronica." He stared at her.
She couldn't die.
"I think I could love you." She said, with direct eye contact.
"I think I do love you" He replied, giving a silent prayer.
"Take care of your child." She whispered, before cuddling against him.
Usually, she avoided him. Keith made her come over, it had been four months. Keith Mars hated him even more. Lamb had signed the deed to Veronica's life. He had given her death to her.
They had sex, as often as possible. Veronica said she might as well get as much in as she can. Lamb said she was a good lay, but it was a lie. He had wanted her since he meet her, even when she was young enough it was creepy, he wanted to wait for her like the hero in a romance novel. He was no hero, he was the reason she was dying.
He held her long enough that he felt satisfied, but let her go before he scared her away. He never wanted to let her walk out of his door. He wanted to lock it and keep her in his bed for the next five months.
She was having his child. She refused the alternative. Everyone tried to convince her, even Don. But she wasn't listening. She wanted Don's child, even if she couldn't hold it herself, just knowing it was growing in her and not someone else, was enough.
OOOO
When they found out it was a girl, he wanted to name her Veronica.
The other Veronica refused.
He was forced to agree that he would name his child something else.
He was going to name her Veronica, though. He couldn't name his daughter anything else.
OOOO
"I love you."
One month remained of Veronica Mars' life and she loved him. He felt blessed and damned at the same time.
"I love you." He repeated, it was killing him inside.
He deserved it, he deserved to feel like he was dying.
He killed Veronica Mars.
And all he ever wanted during those last months was her love. He got it, and it killed him.
OOOO
Fin
AN: What did you think? Depressing? Moving? Thought provoking?
Anyways, I have been majorly busy, but i wanted you to know I am still alive. And I will be posting more to my other stories soon.
Review.