To those who are reading "Falling Into Average," I strongly apologize for not updating in over a month. To try to make up for it, I decided to take a break from writing chapter eleven and came up with this oneshot after listening to a song for the first time. I hope you all enjoy and don't end up killing me :)
DISCLAIMER: I don't own Kingdom Hearts nor the lyrics used in this story.
Whenever grown-ups ask children what they want to be when they get older, most children would respond with the a big-time title, such as a doctor, a singer, an actor, and even a king or queen. Some children would say that they want to become their favorite superhero. There are even children that want to follow the footsteps of their parents. However, since ideas change as a person progresses from child to adult, only a few people would still cling onto their childhood dream and pursue their goal.
One young woman was among that few. Ever since she was little, she strongly believed that she knew her role in life.
She wanted to make a difference in the world and help those who were suffering.
...
Since I was a little girl, I knew what I wanted
One day I would see the world and make my mark on it
...
As a child, she would always be the first person to offer assistance to others whether they were teachers or students. When people would ignore someone who was in tears, she would hold that person's hand and smile at him or her in hopes of alleviating the pain. When someone was hungry, she would share her lunch. When someone was injured, she would be the one applying the band-aids. When there were frowns, she would create smiles.
It was in third grade when she realized her goal in life.
During lunch, she noticed a boy around her age sitting alone at a table in the far corner of the cafeteria. He was twiddling his thumbs and his eyes were staring straight at the floor, looking downcast. Feeling sad for the boy, she got up from her table and made her way over to him. The boy did not seem to notice her presence, so she decided to take a seat next to him.
"Are you okay?" she asked.
The boy quickly turned his head in surprise. "Huh?"
"Are you okay?" she repeated.
"Oh, um, yeah, I'm okay." He directed his eyes back to the floor. "Why are you sitting with me?"
"Because you don't look too happy." She then examined his long-sleeved shirt and sweatpants. "Aren't you hot in those clothes? It's almost summer!"
"No, I'm fine."
"You should roll up your sleeves—"
"I don't want to."
Without knowing what to say next, the little girl looked up at his head and noticed how his brown hair was spiked up in many different directions. His hair looked soft and playful, and her hands were tingling for she wanted to touch it.
'Maybe I should compliment his hair,' she thought. 'Mama always said that people like getting compliments.'
"Your hair looks really cool!" she said. When he finally turned back to her, she asked, "Can I touch it?"
"Why?"
"Please? It looks really soft."
"Um... Okay."
She began to gently stroke each individual spike. When she was halfway done with his hair, she glanced down and saw him trying to force down a smile.
"It's okay to smile, you know," she said, patting his head. She expected him to giggle and release his smile.
However, she did not expect him to scoot away from her and hold his head in pain.
Feeling confused and worried, she reached out for him and asked, "Are—are you okay?"
And without giving a reply, he got up from the table and ran out of the cafeteria.
Recess then came along and the school's playground was full of energy. Kickballs were flying and children were running; the sounds of jump ropes slapping the ground and boys and girls emitting laughter brought a smile to the little girl's face.
But the smile quickly faded when she saw the same boy from the cafeteria sitting alone in the shadow of the school building. His knees were brought up to his chest and his arms were folded, hiding his face.
Knowing that her day would not be perfect until she saw him smile, she walked up to him and asked him the same question as before: "Are you okay?"
He glared up at her. "Why can't you just leave me alone?"
"Because I don't like that look on your face! And I'm still worried about your clothing. I think you're gonna faint if you stay in that!"
"You don't need to worry about me. I'm fine."
"I can't help it. I just want to see you smile."
He huffed. "Like I said. I'm fine."
The little girl kneeled down next to him and placed her hands on his right sleeve. "Well, maybe if we rolled your sleeves up, you'll cool down and be happy!"
"No! Don't!" he gasped, but when he grabbed her hands to stop her, he was too late.
With his forearm revealed, the little girl's eyes widened at the sight of multiple bruises and scratches with crusts of blood on his skin. Underneath the damage were faded scars and other unwelcoming discolorations.
The boy sighed. "You probably think I'm a monster," he said. "That's what everyone else thinks."
"Why would I think that about you?" she replied. "Who did this to you?"
The boy locked his blue eyes with her violet ones, unsure whether to tell her the truth or not. The little girl softly glided her hand over his wounds and squeezed his hand, letting him know that she was someone he could trust.
Though he tried to contain his tears, feeling the warmth of her hand in his made them fall down his cheeks. "Papa beats me 'cause mom isn't around anymore," he quietly let out. "He beats me and tells me that I'm the reason why she left."
The little girl tried to think of something to say to the boy, but no words came to mind because she could not understand his pain. Instead, she squeezed his hand tighter and rested her head on his shoulder while he cried.
'I always see mama give papa kisses whenever he's sad,' she thought. 'Maybe that will help him.'
She leaned up towards his face and planted a kiss on his cheek. His tears stopped falling and his cheeks reddened.
"What's your name?" she asked him.
"Sora," he answered, wiping the remaining tears of his cheeks.
"Well, I'm Kairi, and I'm going to be your friend!" She kissed him again in the same spot. "From now on, I'm going to make you happy!"
This time, the boy smiled.
...
Put in time, sacrificed, never thought of thinking twice
Since I was a little girl, I dreamed
...
Not only did she want Sora to be happy, but she wanted everyone else in the world to be happy, too.
Throughout elementary school, Kairi stuck by Sora's side and introduced him to all her friends. She and Sora would walk home together while they told each other their secrets. Every other day, Sora would come to school with a new wound and Kairi would be the one to care of him and cheer him up.
As they got into middle school, they became the best of friends. Whenever Kairi would volunteer to help out in the community, Sora was with her. Whenever Kairi tried to resolve a fight, Sora supported her. Whenever Kairi donated to organizations, Sora would donate alongside her.
There were a few times in middle school when Sora would be absent for a few days and then come back looking more beat up than ever before. Although he told people that he participated in a boxing club outside of school, Kairi knew that his father was getting angrier and was starting to injure him without caring if he came close to death or not. She insisted that Sora report his father to the police so that he could be safe, but he assured her that he would be fine.
She had enough when high school came along and Sora was hospitalized for a week after getting beaten by a baseball bat.
After a month of chasing the police and making sure that they were actually investigating the case, Kairi was able to get Sora's father behind bars for good. Since her parents would not allow her to live with another boy, she was able to convince her uncle and aunt to have Sora live with them and her cousin, Roxas, until he was able to make a living on his own. Every day she would visit him, take care of his injuries, and tutor him in the classes he missed.
Before the end of their freshman year, their friendship had blossomed into something more. After many attempts by their friends to get them together, the two became a practically inseparable item.
Ever since Kairi told Sora her dream of helping people back in elementary school, Sora began to take notice of how her assistance to others became more and more frequent. She had little time to go on dates with him because she was always volunteering or helping strangers on the street. He then told her that she should start making community organizations of her own and insisted that she take classes that would help her achieve her goal. Although she argued that that would take all the time away from her to be with him, he told her that it would all be okay because she would be happy and he would be there to see it.
From her junior year in high school into all of college, Kairi was able to create successful organizations to help those in need while maintaining a strong relationship with Sora. Because of her success, international organizations began to notice her and were offering her one-time chances to visit other countries and establish centers for aide. When she accepted the offer to go to Africa for a two-year trip to help save people from starvation and children from abuse, she was more than thrilled because she would be one flight away from making her dream come true.
Even though she knew what her role in life would be as a child, she never imagined how it would play out with love in the picture.
...
My alarm clock in the morning said, "You got to go now"
But at breakfast, you were calling and my heart just broke down
'Cause tomorrow we will be waking up separately
Wish I never heard that clock ring
...
The alarm clock beeped loudly in her ears, causing her to groan and slam her hand down on the button to make the sound stop. Opening her eyes, she saw that the clock read five in the morning, meaning that she was two hours away from changing her life. She smiled and rolled over on top of her boyfriend to wake him up, but her smile disappeared as she stared longingly at his face.
'I'm two hours away from leaving his side, too,' she thought. She shook her head and sighed, laying down on his muscular chest and breathing in his scent of vanilla and the ocean. 'Oh, what am I talking about? I'm about to do something that I've wanted to do my whole life!'
She felt him stir underneath her. When he opened his eyes, he wrapped his strong arms around her body and kissed the top of her head.
"Today's the day," he said to her.
"I know," she whispered. She crawled up to where her head was leveled with his and kissed him passionately on the lips. "I should go get ready. We have to leave in an hour."
"All right. I'll go make breakfast." He escaped her hold on him and slowly walked over towards the door.
"Sora?" she called out, already missing his presence.
"Yeah, Kairi?" he said, setting his blue eyes back on her.
"I love you."
He smiled and scratched his head. "I love you a whole lot more."
When he left, Kairi stripped out of her clothing and took a shower. When she finished and stepped out into the bedroom, the smell of Sora's breakfast-in-the-making entered her nostrils and made her stomach grumble in delight.
After putting on new clothes and adding the finishing touches to her suitcases, she made her way over to the kitchen and found an appetizing plate of food waiting for her on the table. Sora came out from the kitchen and smiled at her while she eyed the breakfast before her.
"Since this will be the last time I'll be cooking for you in a long while, I decided to make it extra special," he told her. "Sorry if it's a bit much."
And that was when the thought of leaving fully hit her.
'Last time... Long while...' she repeated in her head. She could feel tears forming at the base of her eyes.
'Last time... Long while...'
"Kairi?" he said, creasing his brow in worry. "Kairi, what's wrong?"
"Sora..." She could not hold the tears in any longer for they were now cascading down her face.
'Last time... Long while...'
"I'm going to miss you," she choked. She shut her eyes and clenched her fists. "I'm going to miss you so much!"
Sora quickly wrapped her up in an embrace and rubbed her back as she let the tears fall and soak into his shoulder. At that moment, Kairi felt as if her heart had broken down. It was tugging at her chest, begging for her to not let go of the man holding her.
But just like she did for him back in third grade, he kissed her cheek and was able to stop the tears from flowing.
"I'm going to miss you, too," he said. "But you've been chasing after this dream since forever ago. Now, go ahead and eat your breakfast while I go wash up a bit."
Kairi could not help but notice that there was a sad edge in his voice when he said that.
Although her mood was too dampened to make her feel hungry, she forced herself to eat and savored the taste of her boyfriend's cooking.
A thought suddenly came into her mind. For the past three years, she and Sora have been living under the same house. She had gotten so used to feeling his warmth and comfort while sleeping with him that she could not imagine herself waking up alone and separate from him.
Why had she not thought of this situation before? Because she was so enraptured with the thought of accomplishing her childhood dream that she did not think about how painful it would be leave Sora behind.
She could not even guess how much pain Sora was in; his smile covered up his thoughts.
With an hour and ten minutes left until she boards the plane, Kairi wished that she had never heard her alarm clock go off.
...
See I don't want to win if my heart's got to lose
So how in the world do I choose?
...
Kairi was silent most of the car ride to the airport. Sora tried to cheer her up with inside jokes that would usually make her laugh, but hearing his voice brought more tears to her eyes.
Even though it was early in the morning, many people were scrambling around trying to find their terminals, buying plane tickets, or getting their last-minute coffees. Announcements were being made as the airplanes arrived and departed, and the electrical sign was constantly making changes to its never-ending list of flights.
Walking into the airport, Kairi knew that she had to make her final decision, but she had no idea what to do.
In thirty minutes, she could be boarding the plane and finally help people internationally, but that would mean leaving the man that she fell in love with.
Or, she could stay behind with Sora and let her life changing experience slip through her hands.
'Why does this have to be so hard on me now?' she thought as Sora placed her suitcases on the conveyor belt. Her heart pounded uncomfortably at the sight. 'I know that Selphie would be disappointed in me. She would be all for staying with the one you love. But, I've been wanting this for so long...'
She felt a familiar hand slip into hers and looked up to see Sora smiling at her. He kissed her forehead and stared lovingly into her violet eyes.
"What's with the distraught face?" he asked her.
"Oh, it's nothing," she smiled, trying to hide her emotions.
"I can tell that it's not nothing."
"Don't worry about me, Sora. I'm fine." She kissed him on the lips.
"I don't like that look on your face!" he exclaimed in a high-pitched, sing-song voice, trying to mimic her little girl voice back in third grade.
She playfully slapped him. "Shut up!"
They walked over to gate twenty-three. They were about to take a seat until one of the flight attendants entered through the doors and occupied the small microphone behind a podium.
"Gate twenty-three, flight to Guinea, Africa, now boarding," she announced.
"Already?" Kairi whined. She squeezed his hand. "Sora..."
"Now, now, Kairi," he said, caressing her face with his free hand. "Don't be scared. You're a brave, wonderful girl who worked so hard for this opportunity. You're about to start making your dreams come true by seeing the world and helping those in need in Africa."
"But, Sora," she could feel the tears coming again, "I'm going to be gone for so long. How could you—how could we even tolerate that?"
All he did was smile. "I'll always be right here waiting for you, Kairi."
...
How can you measure the promise of love
When it's weighing against a chance that comes once?
How can I leave when I know he's the one?
When the dust settles, he might not be here
...
Her heart was tugging at her again, trying to leap out of her chest to stay with the boy that she had always been there for; the man that she wanted to call her husband.
Her thoughts began to short circuit when images of her and Sora splitting up because of the time and distance away from each other came crashing into her mind. She knew that long distance relationships were difficult to maintain, but she just could not see herself living a life without Sora.
Sora was the reason why she came up with her dream in the first place.
Sora was the reason why she kept pushing herself so hard.
Sora was the reason why she became so successful.
Sora was just the reason behind everything that she did.
How could she go on without her main wall of support? But there was just only one chance, one ticket, to change her life.
...
Now I'm standing with you in this terminal
With a ticket so far from your love
And I'm standing with you in this terminal
Crying my eyes out of tears
...
"Kairi, why are you crying so hard?" he asked her, trying to wipe away the tears but to no avail. "You'll be fine."
"I don't know if I want this anymore, Sora," she admitted. Her eyes were producing waterfalls as she held onto him so tightly. She gripped his shirt tightly and bit her lip, trying to pull herself together. "I don't know if I can be so far away from you and for so long!"
"Boarding for gate twenty-three closing in five minutes," announced the flight attendant.
Sora placed his hands on her cheeks and rested his forehead on hers. His touch was so gentle that it made her cry even harder.
"Isn't this what you've wanted?" he asked her.
"I wanted it because of you, Sora," she said. She shook her head and gripped his shirt tighter. "You were the inspiration behind it all. What am I going to do when you're not there with me?"
He smiled again. "I just want you to be happy. That's all I've ever wanted."
She did not know where she would be happier: her dream, or with Sora.
But she had to know, and she had to know now.
So she threw herself at him and kissed him hard on the lips, expressing all her love for him in that one moment for she was not sure if she could ever again.
...
Can I have one more kiss, one more touch
I just can't get enough of you
But I'm in a rush, I got to fly away
Plane's waiting up for me right at gate twenty-three
There's a doorway to my dreams
I could go or I could stay
...
"Boarding for gate twenty-three closing in two minutes," the flight attendant announced.
"Kairi," Sora breathed after they broke apart. "I honestly don't want you to go; I want you to stay here with me. But I don't want you to stop chasing after your goal after you worked so hard for it. This experience will change your life, probably for the better."
She sniffed. "Sora..."
His eyes shined brightly and he smiled at her, but she knew he was hiding his feelings. "The decision is yours, Kairi. Go out there and be happy. Be proud that you accomplished something great. I bet many people are jumping on the edge of their seats, waiting to meet you."
She could not help but smile back at him. Even through all his pain, he still insists on her being happy.
She kissed him one last time, finding it very difficult to pull away from him for she just could not get enough of him. The flight attendant made her final boarding announcement and began guiding a few of the remaining passengers through the hallway towards the plane.
Sora reluctantly ended the kiss and dropped their hands to their sides, his fingers still intertwined in hers.
"You should go now," he said to her. He gave her his goofy grin. "Write to me, okay?"
"I'll come back to you, I promise," she replied, wiping away the last of her tears.
"I know you will."
She slowly let go of his hands and walked over to the door that lead to her airplane. She stopped at the door and stared through the windows, watching as the passengers were smiling and laughing as they boarded the plane.
'This is the doorway to my dreams,' she thought. 'The result of my hard work is right here, right in front of me, and now I'm questioning if this is what I really, really want.'
She looked out and watched as one of the airplanes lifted off from the runway and began its climb into the sky, slowly disappearing into an adventure into the clouds.
'All he wants is for me to be happy and to follow my dream...'
She turned around and looked at Sora, who was still smiling at her but had a questioning look on his face.
This time, she smiled at him.
'And I guess I will.'
...
Should I change my life, or miss my flight?
...
As the plane lifted off, Sora and Kairi began to make arrangements with the airport employees on getting her suitcases back.
-Just in case you didn't catch it, Kairi realized that her actual dream was to be with Sora, so she decided to stay behind (I couldn't separate the two; I love this pairing too much to do that).
-The lyrics used in this story is from JoJo's song "Fly Away" from her "All I Want is Everything" album, coming out later this year. I encourage you all to listen to it. I like the song very much and the lyrics kind of make me sad but happy at the same time. Weird, right? Anyways, I mixed up the lyrics a little bit so that I could fit it into my story better. I don't mean to confuse anyone if you decide to listen to it!
-Once again, I hope I can slightly make up for not updating my ongoing story with the release of this oneshot! I'm really sorry, everyone. I just needed to type up something so that I could get some more inspiration back.
Thanks for reading! I would greatly appreciate reviews. Feedback is certainly helpful!