2. Love begins with a smile, grows with a kiss, and ends with a teardrop
TO: Alicecullen
SUBJECT: I like turtles!
Dear Alice,
Today I was stalked by a vampire called Reginald Aardvark. HELP ME!
I like turtles!
From an extremely depressed Bella
TO: bellaswan
SUBJECT: Subscribe
Dear Bella,
SUBSCRIBE TO ALICE CULLEN'S SUPER FANTASTIC RUMOR COLUMN!
From Alice
TO: bellaswan
SUBJECT: News Flash!
NEWS FLASH!
Edward Cullen is now dating Victoria; the new couple have announced they have been together for 2 months!
Pictures have been released of the couple:
[Pictures of them practically eating each others faces off]
I didn't read the rest, I had already thrown up in Charlie's laundry basket . . . oh well the clothes weren't that great anyway!
THE NEXT DAY . . .
Charlie walked in today and said, "What's that smell? Barf? You pregnant aren't you!"
I told him I was as a joke, he ran out screaming!