My Two Mockingbirds
As I dozed into a dreamlike state, I noticed Boo Radley and Tom Robinson shaking hands. They were having a conversation.
"Hello, my name is Arthur Radley," Boo extended his hand.
Tom Robinson warmly greeted him in return. "Pleased to meet you Arthur."
At that moment, both of them noticed that I was there. I froze, unsure of what to say, my mind racing. Tom spoke first.
"Why if it isn't Jean-Louise, my, you've been growing."
He smiled. I bowed my head in sudden shame. Tom Robinson was convicted by the jury after Atticus had tried in vain to defend him.
'Tom…" I whispered… "Is there any way you can…forgive me?"
Tom looked surprised.
"Forgive you? Why, whatever for?"
My continued silence gave away what I was thinking. He put his good arm on my left shoulder.
"Listen Jean-Louise, your pappy's one of the finest men I ever known, and I know he gave his all at that trial. Listen, you didn't kill me, your pappy didn't kill me, heck it wasn't even the jury that killed me…do you understand what I'm getting at here Jean-Louise?"
The urgency in his voice alerted and confused me at the same time. Not the jury? But they convicted him…Then I felt another hand on my right shoulder, a distantly familiar but comforting touch that I remembered from a while ago. I looked up, it was Boo. And as I looked into his sad eyes, I understood. It was the fear…fear of the unknown. Fear of things that are different. That powerful, terrifying, unfathomable fear. It didn't matter even if Tom Robinson was acquitted, to the town of Maycomb he was "dead", and so were all Negroes living in Maycomb. "Dead" not in physical form but in the minds of others.
And as I looked at Boo I thought of the things that I had done in my earlier years. Skulking around his house at night, making up plays about his life. I remembered the warmth of the blanket that he put around me, and the safety and relief I felt when he saved us from that Halloween night. I was guilty of that fear too wasn't I? I never really understood you until it was too late…
"It's never too late Jean Louise," Boo said softly. I had been speaking aloud?
"Your pappy's got you on the right track, you can fight against the fear, we know you can, just like Atticus is doin'."
Tears streamed down my cheeks, they hadn't given up on us, on me, so I wouldn't give up on them. I grinned as I looked at Tom and Boo.
"And I'll have you guys with me right?" I asked pointing at my heart. They smiled back.
"Every step of the way."