A list of fairly famous couples and what their New Years resolutions are!
Sorry, no Butters :'(
And it's still 10:30 on the 31st here, so technically I'm on time in my timezone.
Disclaimer: I don't own South Park, obviously, and I'm not getting any money from this story either.
Christophe and Gregory
Christophe stared blankly at the sky being lit up with explosions of colors and designs, sitting next to his friend, coworker, and boyfriend, and not really concerning himself with his first true love, the cigarette resting patiently in his hand.
"I'd really like it if you kicked the habit of smoking those this coming year." Gregory rested his curly blonde head on the masculine shoulder for comfort after tilting his head up for such a long period of time.
The Frenchman stayed quiet, not knowing how to personally answer the question without getting a swift kick in the head now for flat out saying no or later when he didn't follow thru.
"Christophe?"
"Oui?"
"Well?"
"Oui, I'll quit." He wasn't going to mess with his chances of getting laid that night.
Stan and Kyle
Randy was doing what he always did New Years; he was drinking, heavily.
His wife wasn't keeping her tabs on him which meant he could drink as much as he wanted, and he wanted to drink a lot.
So, it came as no surprise that he got hammered before midnight rolled around and it also was no surprise that he had to pee like no other after it all.
"I'll, uh… be right um… back." Gerald nodded and watched his friend stumble off into the house, searching for a bathroom that was open.
"Ah, um, man, I'm sorr- Stanley!"
Wrapped tightly in his son's arms and pressed firmly against the white wall was a certain pale redhead who was covered in wet hickeys and a deep blush.
"Damnit Stan, play with Kyle in your bedroom, I gotta piss!"
"Dude, no more making out anywhere near a toilet when your dad is in a fifty yard radius."
Craig and Tweek
Tweek was sitting alone in his quiet house, watching the count down on the small TV in the living room.
It wasn't his first year sitting in front of the flashing screen, if anything it was tradition that his parents left him to it as they went off partying.
He couldn't help but feel so down this time though, he did after all, expect his loving boyfriend to be there with him.
Defeat washing over him as the ball dropped in New York; he pressed the power button and made his way upstairs, sliding into bed and throwing the covers over his face.
He knew he wasn't going to sleep but it was better than watching everyone make out on camera while he wasn't getting anything.
"Tweek, what are you doing in bed? I thought we were going to meet up at Stan's house for the party."
"Oh Jesus, dude, I forgot!"
"Don't worry 'bout it. We can just stay here. It didn't seem all that great anyways."
Walking out of the door frame, Craig leaned in and placed a light kiss on his boyfriend's nose.
Entangled together, Tweek snoring occasionally, Craig made a mental note to always tell his boyfriend his plans out loud from here on out.
Eric and Wendy
Eric was munching on donut holes idly, something he hadn't done in years due to being called fat so often and so much, and was waiting for his mom to tumble in from her night out, but knew it wasn't going to happen until morning rolled around.
He would have attended Marsh's party but he knew Wendy was going to be there, so instead he ate all the junk food in the house.
He wished he didn't call her a cunt, but how else do you show a woman that you love them?
Deciding that he was going to win the hippie girl over in the New Year, he wrote in his planner to check the internet on how to properly woo a lady.
Cartman never gave up easily.
Damien and Pip
"I'm sorry about my father."
"No, it's okay. I enjoyed dining with him tonight."
"You're so perfect, Pip."
Damien passionately slammed his lips against the mortal who in return kissed back with just as much force.
As their tongues fought for dominance that they both knew the anti-christ would win, a teen dropped from earth to the kingdom of hell.
"Damien, I-I think I'm ready to take the next step."
Never feeling more grateful, he lifted the British boy from his delicate feet and started off to his room.
Just as everything was getting hot and heavy the thick, metal door flung open with ease.
"Yo, Damie, Pips old chap. Woah, mind if I join?"
"McCormick! Get out of my room!"
Kenny threw his now ungloved, due to the magma flowing freely from just about everywhere, hands up, and grumbled a fine.
"Damnit, remind me to have a conference with someone to keep that kid from coming down here again."