Here's another chapter. Today shall be (hopefully) epicness. So ENJOY!

Disclaimer: *looks back through certains* Do I really have to do this? *waits then sighs* I don't own Naruto. Call the press! Now enjoy what I typed!

I had been wormed. Black duct tape plastered on my lips, and rope binding my limbs together. I didn't remember how long I had been carried by them, and I didn't know who was carrying me, because I was blindfolded.

I squirmed, then remembered everything I knew with my experience with band-aids. When the adhesive becomes wet, it doesn't stick as well, and is easily peeled off. So, if I use that, then I could at least get this tape off.

I opened my mouth the best I could, and licked the adhesive, then purposefully salvitated, feeling it come loose. And I can reach my head to my shoulder, so I can remove the cloth around my eyes! ...I seriously need to get out more often.

With one last poke of my tounge, I was rid of the tape. I then rubbed my nose against my shoulder, making it seem I was scratching it, but I slid my head so my shoulder went up the bridge of my nose, then lifting the blindfold.

I saw Sasori, who was looking at me with surprise. He opened his mouth, but I gained the strength to lift my legs and kick him in the face.

"Falcon... kick!" I declared as my feet hit him. Tobi ran to him, making sure he was okay. Wiggling more, I got free of Kisame's iron grip. Then, I did a barrel roll down the hall, momentarily forgetting about the stairs.

After my tumble down the Evil Staircase of Pain and Doom, I managed to get on my feet, hopping away.

Footsteps swiftly followed behind, making me hop that much faster. The ropes were loosening around my legs, allowing more freedom.

I got several looks from surrounding students, especially the seventh graders. The girls were snickering and the guys just stared at me. I thought I was going pretty good, until I was tackled.

They thought they had me, but I felt where the legs started, then kicked in that same spot. Yumi: Almighty Dick Kicker of Freedom. I was free, so I wormed away, then rolled again.

I now hate stairs

The ropes are loosening! I repeat, he ropes are loosening! I can now run at full pace!

"Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit!" I shouted, seeing that Hidan was in front of me, waiting for me to come running into him.

Have I ever mentioned that these floors are slick?

I then rolled, or... tripped and fell on my ass. Then slid, knocking Hidan down but on me, almost like a dog pile. I groaned, having my head hit the tile floor twice today.

"I fucking got the bitch!" he shouted in pride.

"That is where you are wrong," I pointed out. He looked down at me. "Technically, I was the one who got you-"

"But look who's toping, bitch!" he retorted, cutting me off. That sounded wrong on so many levels.

"I'm not your Uke, fucker!" I screamed.

"You're fucking insane," he pointed out. "You're full of fucking madness."

(A/N I know what you're thinking. And yes, it's going to happen.)

"Madness? No! This. Is. SPARTA!" I declared, rocking forward and headbutting him. He lost his balance and I rolled right, got up, and the chasing began.

Ever accidentally face-palmed, only the palm wasn't your own?

Indeed, after about five minutes of chasing, I had rammed my face into Peins hand.

After flying backwards a few feet, like he used some almighty push or something, I glared at him.

"You did well evading my members and escaping, so he first part of your initation test has been passed," he said, that god-like voice booming again. I wiggled out of the ropes and stood up, glaring at him. There's mad, then there's ticked, then there's pissed, then enraged.

But with Yumi, there's mad, pissed, and scary angry. I was between pissed and scary angry.

"This was only part of the test...?"

"Yes. The second part of the test is something we will go over in the morning."

Shit, I hate waiting.

Let sleeping Yumi's sleep!

Something was tugging at my arm, but I pulled my arm back and snuggled deep in the blanket, enjoying my sleep. I heard murmering, but was too tired to care.

Third-person Point of Veiw

Itachi tugged on the sleeping girl's arm, but she pulled it back in defiance. Sighing, he turned to his leader.

"She's out like a light," he whispered. Pein nodded, then turned to Hidan.

"Hidan, do you know what to do?" he asked in a murmer. Excited, the Jashinist nodded, then quietly moved into the bed with Yumi, under the blanket and all. Smirking to himself, he wrapped his arm around her waist.

Yumi Point of View

Warmth suddenly wrapped itself around me, inducing more sleep. I curled up more. "Mm, warm," I said. The heat source stiffened against my back, but quickly relaxed. I turned, almost nuzzling my face in the near-squishyness. If that's a word. Leave my sleep vocabulary alone!

Why must perverted attractive guys be so damn warm?

My eyes cracked open, seeing nearly bare chest. Then I saw a religious pendant, then smug and embarrassed purple eyes, then blushed cheeks, then slicked back silver hair.

Instead of spazzing out and shoving him off and kicking him in the nuts like usual, I smiled widely and hugged him.

"I shall call him Squishy, and he shall be mine, and he shall be my Squishy!" I chanted, quoting the words of Dory from Finding Nemo.

"Get the fuck off me!" he commanded. I looked at him in mock hurt, pouting.

"B-but Hidaaaan~! You were the one in my bed with me in the first plaaace~!" I whined. He glared at me, but then looked away, cheeks deepening. I knew I had won.

"Damn girls and their fucking faces," he cursed. Smiling once more, I nuzzled my face into his chest.

"SQUISHY!" I shouted once more, throwing us off of my bed and landing on him. After I crawled off of him, I looked at the guys. In the second day I have known him, I saw Itachi Uchiha smiling! That's right! Smiling, bitches!

From what I heard from Sasuke, Itachi never smiles. Never. Must I spell it? N-E-V-E-R. Never.

I pointed at him. "Ah-ha! So the emotionless Itachi can smile! Victory is mine!"

The smile grew bigger, and I got scared. And yes, it was called 'The smile'. It's just that important.

In a flash, I was on he floor, my wrists pinned to the carpet above my head by his left hand, the other supporting himself up. My legs were spread, his in the push-up drill position. His head lowered to my ear, The Smile growing oh so widely.

"Who is victorious now?" he whispered menacingly. A shiver went down my spine. Then I smirked.

"Stop mocking me," I whispered back, thus quoting Stewie. I caught his two legs between my knees and shins and flipped, then stood back up. This is sexual harrassment!

"Nice, nice," Itachi said plainly. I turned to Deidara, Sasori, and Pein. Deidara was slowly backing away. Sasori stared blankly ahead, and Pein was... walking... this... way. I backed away, but bumped into Hidan and Itachi. I glared at them.

"Fuck all of you and your tallness," I complained, crossing my arms.

Hidan smiled sadistically. "I would, but I would need some help with that."

"Eep!" I squeaked, retreating behind Sasori. He side stepped, so I went behind Deidara.

I apparently room with a bunch of assholes.

I was tied up again, only like, cheesey movies where you get tied in the closet or something. And yes, I was tied to my computer chair.

Pein looked at me, his ringed eyes creeping me out.

"Yumi, the second stage of your initation test begins now," he announced. I raised an eyebrow.

"Which is...?"

"You must pull a prank with someone else, on all of the teachers in ninth grade, the entire principal's office in addition, in two weeks."

"By myself?"

"Itachi and Hidan will accompany you. Itachi will know how to set it up, and Hidan will be there to help give you ideas."

My head went ragdoll at the moment he mentioned that Itachi and Hidan would help me.

Thank you for Saturdays.

I was untied and ran a brush through my hair, not bothering with the normal foundation of blush and mascara, making me look paler. I slipped on a pair of flip-flops, and out the door I went.

Itachi and Hidan were following me, one on either side.

"Hi-yah!"

Hidan, you've just got owned by a girl wearing pink bunny slippers.

Hidan had just been Spartan kicked down the stairs. And the girl who kicked him, she was wearing pink fluffy bunny slippers.

I burst out laughing, leaning against the wall for support. Itachi gave the less creepy smile I had made him show earlier this morning.

"That- was- so- ninja!" I said between laughs. I was now falling on my side, struggling to breathe. The girl smiled proudly, wiggling her toes and making the bunnies move.

Bunnies of Imminent Doom: 1

Hidan: 0

"Er... is she okay?" she said, pointing to me. Hidan had resurfaced from the stair case, noticing how I wasn't moving. It took me a while to realize I wasn't breathing. Breath would not come.

After a bit of struggle, I still couldn't figure out a way to breathe. Hidan was in a hurry to flip me on my back and leaned over me. Closer, closer, now he's invading my bubble. Stop bein a bubble-invader, damn you!

His mouth was hovering over my forced open one. Breath returned, and I was thinking about spiting in his mouth, when I closed it and again, headbutted him.

Does it still count if my forehead hits his cheek? Well then, forget boot to the face, we got head to the cheek! ... It fails.

I kinda felt bad for Hidan. I'll try to be nicer to him, but no promises.

I stood (after Hidan got off of me first) and smiled at the Ninja Bunny Slipper trainer. "Sorry about that," I said, blushing a bit of embarassment.

"Naw, it's okay. It's not the first time I've taken someone down with my bunnies," she said, laughing. She smiled.

Her blond hair hung loosely around her shoulders, waves texturizing it (stop critisizing my damn vocabulary!). Her ice blue eyes were warm and kind, her cheek bones blazing pink. She wore a dark green v-neck short-sleeved shirt, and orange freckles dotted the bridge of her nose.

"I'm Yumi," I greeted. Then I shuffled slightly closer to her and whispered, "And the idiot you sent flying is one of my room mates."

She giggled. "I wouldn't mind it," she teased. I rolled my eyes. Obviously, she didn't understand having to room with five guys.

"Trust me, it's not all it's cracked up to be," I promised. She laughed more.

"Anyways, I'm Kayla," Kayla introduced.

I looked around. "Hey, I'm trying to pass an initation test so I can apparently be part of the 'Akatsuki' and I need to pull pranks on all of the ninth grade teachers and then the office. So, care to help?"

She nodded eagerly then leapt at me, glomping me for the third time in a week. "Yes! This'll be hella' fun!"

"Let's go!" I said, rushing to anatomy to start planning. I searched through Jiraiya's desk, finding porn magazines, some sort of tool that I was sure he masturbated with, a picture of Tsunade, and porn movies. I got an idea.

"What'd you find?" Hidan asked. I looked at him, a smirk dancing across my lips.

"Hidan, I need you to get me a sharpie, and a VCR tape of: Toy Story, Lion King, Cinderella, and Finding Nemo," I ordered. He looked at me and I gave him a 'Just do it' look. He obeyed and quickly left to the library.

"What do you need me to do?" Kayla asked.

"Kayla, we need a screwdriver, a hammer, and a wash rag!" I said excitedly. She nodded and left.

Epic time lapse (use your imagination, okay?)

I was now tranferring the films onto the porn ones. Thankfully, the original film stayed on the cassettes.

After that, I grabbed the king size Sharpie and started going through Jiraiya's magazines, marking a censor bar through the 'private areas' as we were taught in fourth grade.

Now, was the Masturbo-majig to deal with. Somehow, Itachi knew a great deal in machinery and knew how it worked, so he worked with that. I looked around the room, posters of female anatomy hanging about. I got my Sharpie and marked through the chestal and lower reigons.

Foot steps came down the hall. I tensed.

Closer, closer, they stopped.

"Ffffffffffuuuuuuuuuuuuuck!" I mouthed.

"Hide, but do it silently," Itachi mouthed back, gently setting the Masturbo-majig in the drawer, same as all of the stuff we found in there.

Itachi crawled under the desk. Hidan took under the sink. Kayla took in an empty cabinet, and where'd that leave me? On the opposite side of under the sink with Hidan.

Keys jiggled and the door opened. I held my breath. I looked at Hidan, panicked. He looked back, face mirroring mine. I didn't blame him, honstly. It was his second day here, and he was already on the edge of getting caught doing something.

The footsteps walked over to the sink. A shadow loomed over the crack in the doors. I tried to flatten myself as flat as paper, it was no good.

"Hidan, we may have to kick ass today," I mouthed. He nodded. A hand gripped the handle.

"Let's kick some ass," he mouthed back. My heart sped up, and I was sure they could hear it. I grabbed a bottle of Lysol and gripped it, index finger laying lightly and readily on the arrow to spray. Hidan grabbed Windex.

The door swung open and I leapt out, pinning the perpatrator to the tile floor, Lysol in the air ready to strike. I looked at who it was and hit them in the head with the can of Lysol.

"I fucking hate you," I said, nearly having a heart attack.

"What can I say? Pein told me to see how you were doing, hm," the blond said.

"Fucker..." I said weakly, letting my heartbeat regulate. Deidara laughed. Itachi surfaced from the desk, Kayla poking out of the cabinet.

"Everything clear?" Itachi asked in monotone. Deidara turned from sly to pissed.

"Damn Uchihas, hm!" he cursed. "Thinking they're so cool and insulting real art, hm!"

Ignoring Deidara's little thing, I looked at Itachi. "Did you finish screwing with the thing in Jiraiya's desk?"

"Yes, and I set it back in," he said, showing me the tools. I hurried and grabbed them, tossing them next to the cadaver, which the class thought it would be hilarious to name Pablo. Whatever reason is beyond me.

"On to the next one?" Hidan asked, smirking. I nodded, cleaning up the room and turning off the light, and leaving, locking to door as well.

"Let's go prank us some bitches!" I said, even more pumped that we were getting a move on.

Third-person Point of Veiw

In the creeper-lab

A man watched the screen as a group of teenagers messed around with stuff in his old friend/new enemy's class room. The had just left, showing virtually no evidence of anything.

"I give them credit," he said to himself, a sadistic grin dancing across his pale lips. "They cleaned up after themselves quite well."

"Sir, what should we do about them?" his underling asked. The man just kept smiling and looked back to the screen.

"In due time, Kabuto. In due time."

Please review! I don't own anything... except a lot.

Okay, sorry to all you Oro and Kabuto fans, but we need a bad guy!

And, Kayla belongs to miragechick2, so ask her if you want to use her in your stories! Or she will find you.

Also! Death threats for upcoming chapters, though this isn't necessarily a popular story. Best one(s) will be used.

NOW REVIEW!